


The Long Road

by 8Cyborg, TheWriterValkyrie



Series: Saga of Steel [4]
Category: Warframe
Genre: Alad is now a full fledged shotgun dad, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/M, Falling In Love, Friendship, Gen, Idiots in Love, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Love Confessions, Marriage Proposal, Nightmares, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Redemption, Regret, Saryn's trying her best, Self-Hatred, She wants to be a good girl, Space Mom has Good Ideas, Suicidal Thoughts, Tags May Change, Titania's a fucking fairy, Tyl is still dad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:21:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 40
Words: 103,738
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25214587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/8Cyborg/pseuds/8Cyborg, https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWriterValkyrie/pseuds/TheWriterValkyrie
Summary: Saryn starts on the road to redemption, only to find it much rockier and more desolate than she first thought, and begins questioning if she can make it. Aided by the Lotus's behind-the-scenes-scheming, and someone who has no business helping her, there might still be hope.Update: Chapter 40 is up. It's the epilogue. Thank you all for reading! :]
Relationships: Saryn/Tyl Regor
Series: Saga of Steel [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1743274
Comments: 277
Kudos: 87





	1. The Wilting White Orchid

**Author's Note:**

> It's here! And two chapters in one day because they're both kind of short. They'll lengthen as it goes on, don't worry.

Some people have the ability to disregard reality. Saryn used to be one of those people. But sometimes reality gets sick of being ignored, and hits you in the face to get to your attention.

A ball. That’s all she was, just a ball on the floor. Not a Warframe, not someone who tried to destroy someone else’s life. Just a nice, curled up ball…

Oh, what use was it? She would never be able to get away, release herself from the mental prison she had built around her mind. What made her think that she had any sort of decency in her? Not the time when she talked Kelpie into fighting a foe too strong for her, nor when she put her plan into motion to see her gone. No, she was horrible. A horrible thing, curled up on her floor, trying so hard to not feel anything that she felt too much. 

All her scheming, all her downward spiraling had cost her Nidus, cost her the one thing she loved most in life. Looking at it now, maybe it was for the best. He deserved better. So much better than her, and the monster she’d slowly grown herself into, without even noticing it. What had happened? Even she didn’t really know. All she knew that was now everybody saw her for what she really was. A low-life piece of scum that nearly got someone killed for no good reason at all. The worst part was that she had done it to herself. There was no one else to blame; it was completely her fault. Even Vauban had finally gotten wise to her. Vauban, who had always tolerated her. He had probably gotten sick of trying to stop her from destroying herself. And now she was completely alone. 

“Saryn, what happened to you? I don’t ever remember seeing you like this.”

Well, maybe not alone. Although, Ordis didn’t really count as company, being as the ship's cephalon was always there.

“You’ve been doing this for a while.” he added, concerned. She felt that concern was misplaced but didn't have the energy to argue about it.

“I’m fine, Ordis.” she said, her voice carefully devoid of anything other than apathy.

“Are you sure? You’ve been in that position for quite a while.”

“And? What, am I not allowed to lay on the floor now?” she said, and instantly regretted it. “Sorry.”

“Is there something I can do?” the cephalon inquired.

Saryn sighed. “No, Ordis, there’s nothing. Not even I can do anything, nor can anyone else. Only time is really going to fix anything.” 

“As you say, then. Maybe you should try and take your mind off it for a while.”

“And how do you suggest doing that?”

“Maybe go on a few missions- _ bathe in your enemies’ blood- _ and try to clear your head.”

“Is there anything I can do solo?” 

“Lets see...there’s a capture at Ariel. The only other open mission at the moment is an extermination at Puck.”

“I’ll go to Ariel, seems easy enough.” It was just busywork, but anything to keep her mind off her feelings was good enough for her. Anything to distract her from how she hadn’t talked to another frame in months was a blessing. Anything that would take her attention away from the fact that she had no idea how to go about fixing things was divine intervention.

While Saryn set about her mission, Ordis had a little talk with the Lotus.

“ _ Yes, Ordis? _ ” She picked up immediately.

“Is there nothing you can do for her?” 

“ _ There are things that I  _ can _ do, but am unwilling at this point. Although she is down, she must suffer the consequences of what she did.” _

“But, she’s so...she’s at her wit’s end, Lotus.”

“ _ Don’t worry, Ordis. I’m not saying that she must endure this alone, as I’m sure that some of the frames will see her try to change, and help. But the price must be paid.” _

__ “And if they - _ abandon her forever- _ don’t try and help? If things continue as they are, and she starts looking elsewhere for a companion? What then?”

“ _ Then we will take things as they come. Do not lose hope, Ordis. The darkest bit of night is yet to come, but we’ll get through it. Know that I have my eye on her.” _

__ “I will trust you on this, Lotus.”

“ _ Thank you, Ordis.” _

She ended the call, and Ordis wondered if the Lotus was doing the right thing, or not. He decided to keep his word, and trust her. Saryn returned from her mission half an hour later, bloodied and tired, and he hoped she was right about this.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  


The lady of the hour herself, as she looks in the Saga

  



	2. On Thin Ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hildryn is a good buff girl, Saryn is experiencing friendship and it's not magic.

Hildryn was one of those Warframes that could get along with practically anybody.   
  
Sure, she wasn’t the only one. Chroma’s easy going nature, and much higher quality prime goods than Baro, Oberon’s patience and healing ability, and Octavia being a literal ball of sunshine made the three of them very popular as well, but what made Hildryn stand out is that she had no prior antagonism with Saryn. The two had barely shared one or two words, much less had time to get under each other’s skin, and that is what Lotus was after. 

She was startled by a call, and looked down to see it was the Lotus. She quickly picked up, admittedly nervous.

“Hello, Lotus.” she said, trying to keep her tone even.

“ _ Hello, Hildryn. I trust you are well?” _

__ “Yes, no complaints. To what do I owe this call?”

“ _ I’ve got an unusual task, and I couldn’t think of anyone better for it than you. _ ”

“What do you want me to do?” she asked, doing her best to keep the eager tone out of her voice. Hildryn, always ready to help whoever needed her, was thrilled at the prospect of a mission from the Lotus herself. 

Lotus gave her a gentle smile. “ _ It’s nice to see you so willing. Saryn’s trying for the straight and narrow, and she needs some help to stay on it. Since the two of you have no prior antagonism, I feel that you’d be perfect. _ ” __

Hildryn was surprised. She’d never been asked to be someone else’s friend, much less been asked to do anything personally by the Lotus. However, she also knew of Saryn’s reputation, and wasn’t convinced that she would be willing to turn her act around this quickly.

“Are you sure about this, Lotus? I feel like she’d just go back to her old ways before too long.”

“ _ You’re not the only one, and I understand, but she really does want to try again. Give her the benefit of the doubt. _ ”

Hildryn rubbed the back of her neck. “I’ll trust you, Lotus, but I’m still going to be wary of her. She does have a reputation, after all.”

“ _ As I said, I understand. However, I would advise you to give her a chance. She is trying, and deserves that much, at least. _ ”

Hildryn nodded. “I’ll do my best, Lotus.”

“ _ Thank you, Hildryn. I’ll leave you to your judgement as to how to go about it. Let me know if I can help, as well. _ ”

“I will. Thank you for giving me this chance.”

The Lotus smiled and nodded at her, and ended the call. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saryn stood in her usual out-of-the-way position, tucked into a corner and trying to keep her legs from shaking. She’d gotten a message from Hildryn, and was waiting for her, unsure what was going on. She wasn’t sure that she trusted her, but something had made her show up, though she didn’t know why. So she kept herself hidden and watched for her, trying to stay out of sight from the rest of the relay.

It would not be a warm welcome if anyone saw her, especially if Kelpie was around. 

She couldn’t handle that sort of thing over again, getting rejected and cast out. She tucked herself further back into her hiding place, trying to make herself as small as possible. 

Fortunately, she was saved more unpleasant thoughts by Hildryn walking in. She peered out, before motioning her close.

“Well this is an...interesting haunt. You come here often?” she asked, trying to break the ice. Saryn shook her head.

“Too risky. Ember bounced her Glaive Prime off my head last time.”

“That must have hurt,” Hildryn said, sympathetically.

She nodded. “Mari thought it was hilarious. Not like I didn’t have it coming, but still.”

“Mari?”

“My operator. She’s not...very fond of me.”

Hildryn sait down next to her. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Again, not like I didn’t have it coming.”

“Don’t you want another chance?” she asked, lightly testing the waters.

“‘Course I do, and how well do you think things have been going? It’s been four months.” Saryn slumped slightly, putting her chin on her raised knees.

“Maybe the others just need more time. It hasn’t been that long, after all.”

“Yeah, I know it won’t be instantaneous, but still. It’s starting to get kind of lonely. Not that I can’t take it, but I wish that at least Vauban would talk to me again. Especially after the bastard stole my sugatra.”

“Why would he do that?”

“He said since I took so much from Kelpie, he was going to take something of mine. Gave it to her. I loved that damn thing too.”

Hildryn was silent, having nothing to say about the subject. Instead, she changed the subject. 

“I was thinking. Your orbiter must be getting lonely, and so I wanted to ask if you wanted to join me on some missions? I’d be happy to have you along.” She turned to face her. 

“W-wait, seriously?” Saryn stared at her in disbelief, hope starting to cautiously grow a little green sprout in her heart.

“Well, yeah. You know your way around your blades, and I’d like to see you in action. Besides, I think that we can be friends.” She reached over, putting a hand on her shoulder.

“I...hope you don’t come to eat your words.”

“Don’t worry, I’m sure that things will be fine.” 


	3. It's Not Pretty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alad N friends have a talk, Hildryn is waaaay out of her depth.

Four months turned out to be a shockingly short amount of time.

To Alad, it seemed like it had only been four weeks, or days, since everything went sideways. Between taking care of Kelpie, and the time he spent finalizing his plans with Zuud, the time had just slipped away, leaving him rather floored. Everything was just so...normal.

Ish.

There seemed to be this underlying feeling of...something. Like something that everyone had in the back of their minds, but didn’t talk about, in order to try to keep up some semblance of normalcy. Instead, they talked amongst themselves as if nothing had happened, because talking about it with anyone but Alad wouldn’t help matters. Furthermore, Alad didn’t seem to want to talk about it, changing the subject instead of answering questions about the incident, although he was more than happy to spit venom about Saryn whenever that particular topic came up.

Or, that would have normally been the case. Today, he just wasn’t rising to the occasion, and seemed more withdrawn than usual.

“Are you alright? You seem quieter than normal.” Umbra asked, watching him with his exposed eye.

“Well...Kelpie isn’t recovering as well as I had hoped she would.” Alad didn’t move from his spot, looking at the floor. “Physically, she’s fine. It’s her mind that’s struggling, and I just...I don’t know what to do.”

“Well, it’s bound to take a while.” Umbra said, less sympathetic than expected. Oberon glared at him.

“I-I know, but...I’d hoped that she’d at least be willing to wander the relay by now. I can’t say that I blame her, though. I’m just worried about her, I suppose.”

“I definitely can’t blame her for not wanting to run into Saryn. Heck, even  _ I  _ don’t want to run into her, and she’s been keeping to herself recently.” Oberon added.

“Oh, has she now?” Alad’s disgust was plain in his voice. “I’m surprised she had the gall to even show up. What’s she been doing?”

“The missions nobody wants to do, mostly. Either that, or sitting in a corner looking pathetic. Doesn’t really talk to anyone, and when she tries it tends to not go well.” Titania answered, sitting on Garuda’s head in her tiny pixie form, the gold of her prime shimmering softly.

“Ok, how long did you watch her?” Garuda asked.

“Oh, just a couple of hours. Long enough to get a good idea of what she was doing.”

“That’s a bit weird, Titania.” Alad said, glancing over his shoulder at her. “Do you have nothing better to do when Chroma’s on one of his Void trips?”

“I was curious, ok? And besides, somebody had to, just to see what she was doing. It’s not like I’m gonna get in trouble for it, anyway.”

“That’s still questionable behavior, Titania.” Garuda picked her off her head, putting her on the table. She crossed her arms and glared at her.

“She’s free to it.” Alad said bitterly. 

“That doesn’t mean she should, Alad,” Oberon brought up, leaning against the wall. “It’s one thing to be watching someone, but it’s entirely another to be stalking them.”

“Saryn’s done a lot of things she shouldn’t have as well, it’s about time someone gave the wretch a taste of her own medicine.” 

“If you hate her so much, why don’t you try and get rid of her? With your gun, I mean.” Titania suggested.

“Theoretically, if we did do that...what’s the difference between what we’re doing and what she tried to do to Kelpie. How would we be any different?” Umbra challenged.

Valkyr, who was sitting on the edge of Alad’s desk and inspecting the pads on her toes, looked up at Titania. “You’re a fucked up little fairy, you know that?”

“Ok ok sorry, geez. I was just bringing it up as a what if. I don’t like Saryn, but I wasn’t suggesting he actually goes and does it. But I mean...better or not, we’d be getting rid of someone who’s absolutely horrible and really doesn’t do much for us.”

“Where’s the honor in that?” Umbra asked.

“Where’s the honor in what Saryn did?” Alad retorted, backing Titania’s statement.

“Convince me that the Lotus would let that fly, Alad. Just because she did some horrible things, doesn’t mean that we should stoop to her level, and do them back to her.”

“I am fully aware that Lotus wants her alive for some unfathomable reason, which is unfortunate. You have no idea how badly I wanted Ragnarok’s first shot to have her at the other end of it.”

“Don’t try anything.” Oberon warned.

“Oh come off it, Bambi. He sees this differently than we do because his relation to Kelpie is different than ours. Give him a break.” Valkyr said, flexing the claws on one foot.

“What does Kelpie want?” Garuda asked.

That silenced everyone. Everyone looked at Alad, who shrugged. 

“She doesn’t talk about it, and I don’t blame her. I’m definitely not going to bring it up until she’s ready.”

After a moment, Oberon answered. “Then it is not our place to try and determine the fate of Saryn, without the opinion we should respect most about the matter.”

“I guess you're right.” Titania conceded. She looked over at Alad, who simply nodded.

“Besides, who knows, maybe she really does mean to change.” Valkyr said. 

Alad snorted. “Mercury has a better chance of freezing over twice.”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Oberon? Do you have a minute?” Hildryn asked. He stopped his conversation with Umbra and Garuda.

“Yeah, I can talk. What’s bothering you?” he asked.

“Wha-? You could tell so easily? You’ve really got a knack for it.”

“I do what I can.” he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. “So, what’s up?”

“Well...it’s about something the Lotus asked me to do. You see...she asked me to befriend Saryn.” 

“...She what?” he asked in disbelief. “I...she  _ what!?” _

“I mean, I trust her, but...I’m lost as to what to do or say, and I figured that maybe you could help,” she said, looking at the three of them. 

“What would you want us to do?”

“I don’t know if we even can do something.” Garuda added.

“The Lotus seems to think so. She wouldn’t have asked otherwise.” Umbra spoke up. 

“I know, but...I just can’t help but wonder if she’s wrong this time, and whether I should do as she asks or not.” Hildryn looked down. “Maybe it’s unfair of me to think that way but, well, you all know Saryn, you know what she was like. I just can’t help but think in the back of my mind that this is going to turn out to be a lost cause, one way or another, and I don’t like thinking that way.”

Umbra took a deep breath. “Well, if the Lotus asked you to do it, it’s a good idea to try. It’s not like she’s ever steered us wrong before.”

Oberon gave him a look. “Do you not remember the Golden Halls incident?”

“Right, ok, but she didn’t know that would happen.”

“It still happened, so she’s not infallible.”

“That’s fair.” 

“Do...do any of you think Saryn can make a turnaround?” Hildryn asked, quieter than she’d meant to. 

“I suppose that it’s possible,” Garuda said after a moment. “But I have to say, I wouldn’t be surprised if she failed to make it.”

“I would like to say she could. I definitely don’t trust her as far as I can throw her, but if she really is trying, I hope she makes it eventually.” Oberon answered.

“I’d be massively surprised if she even made an effort, if I’m honest.” Everyone turned to look at Umbra, who continued. “I mean, she’s tried other ‘plans’ like this before, for her own gain, and that’s what this feels like to me. She just wants to be let back in to continue her schemes. What she’s doing now? Most likely just a trick.”

“Who stole your prime parts?” Garuda asked, entwining her arm with his. He sighed.

“Look, we all know how sinister she can be. I’m just saying that we should be careful, just in case this isn’t what it seems.”

“Makes sense.” Hildryn said slowly. “I’d like to believe she can change...but I just can’t, not now at least. She does seem repentant though. And quite lonely. Why did Ember bounce her Glaive prime off her head?” 

“Argument, Ember told her to leave and threw it at her.” Umbra answered her. “A bit more mean-spirited than she usually is, I must admit.”

Oberon was quiet for a moment. “I can’t say I blame her, but...she isn’t like that. At least, not that I’ve ever heard of.”

“Saryn brings out the worst in everybody.”

“Umbra!” Garuda swatted his arm. 

“What? Am I wrong? I mean, think about it. Everyone gets all snappy and upset just  _ talking  _ about her, moreso when she’s in the room.”

“Still, you don’t have to be like that.” She turned to Hildryn. “Don’t worry. If there’s anyone who can handle her, it’s you.”

“Do you have any suggestions, because that would really help. I’m kind of flying blind here.”

“Don’t do what we’re doing, which is being negative. Or, don’t do what Umbra and I are doing. Oberon is...Oberon.”

“Do as I say, not as I do?”

“Exactly!” she replied cheerily. “But seriously, I would like to see her make it. I remember her from a long time ago. She was quite pleasant, and it would be nice to see her return to that.”

“Well...I’d like to see that. Maybe there’s hope for the future. Thanks for the help.” Hildryn turned and left, waving over her shoulder. 


	4. Lua's Silver Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hildryn and Saryn have their first buddy cop outting. Things die, Larkspur is awesome, Hildryn is whatever the female version of a bro is.

Saryn awoke to her communications sounding off. She sat up, looking around her dark orbiter, blinking under her helmet. The alert went off again, jogging her brain. She accepted the request, and Hildryn greeted her.

“Hey Saryn, whats...oh damn, you look a bit...bedraggled, are you ok?” 

“I...I’m fine, I just woke up. What’s going on?”

_ Woke up?  _ “Nothing’s going on, I was just wondering if you wanted to come on a mission with me.”

“What mission is it?” she asked, stretching her neck and back.

“It’s Tycho on Lua.”

Saryn groaned. “A survival mission, and on Lua? You really know how to pick them, don’t you?”

Hildryn laughed. “Yep! I figured your abilities would be great for survival, with big groups you can infect and all.”

She sighed. “Well, I can’t say that I don’t want the company, but...are you sure that you want me to come?”

“Of course, I wouldn’t have asked, otherwise.”   
  
“Oh, alright. I can join you. It’s better than standing around watching Mari give me dirty looks. Besides that, I’ve been asleep so long I feel stiffer than a sheet of metal.”

Hildryn couldn’t hold herself back. “I have to ask, why were you sleeping?” Warframes didn’t need sleep, the helminth making that, along with consumption, an unnecessary facet, but they still could if they felt like it. Saryn balked at the question.

“Uh...well, I just kind of...felt like it?” An obvious lie, but Hildryn decided not to press.

“Fair enough, I suppose. I’ll meet you in the relay in an hour?”

“Sure. I’ve got to screw around with weapons anyway.”

“Okay, I’ll see you then.” Hildryn ended the call, still wondering why Saryn would want to sleep. She was the only frame she’d ever met who took advantage of their ability to fall asleep. Even Kelpie didn’t.   
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
Hildryn wandered around Larunda, looking for Saryn. Oh sure, she’d agreed to go with her, but good luck trying to find her to actually start the mission. When that girl didn’t want to be found, she wouldn’t be found, it seemed.

Then she started as she felt a tap on her shoulder. Turning around, she saw Saryn standing behind her, somewhat bashfully. 

“I-I’m sorry, I would have been here earlier, but...I got wrapped up in some things. We can go now though, if you still want me to come along.” 

Hildryn sighed. “It’s alright, really. If you’re ready, let’s go.”

Saryn nodded and headed off, Hildryn wondering what she’s gotten herself into.   
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
Lua was as usual. Dusty, creepy, and unpleasant.

Saryn shivered at the chill of it, everything bathed an odd silver color, dulling even the vibrant gold of the ruins and giving it a ghostly appearance.

“So, what’s the plan? Just not die until Lotus says we can go home?” Saryn asked, constantly looking over her shoulder.

“That’s about it, really. It shouldn’t be a problem, but just yell if you’re in trouble.” Hildryn shouldered Larkspur, heading off down the hall. 

“W-wait, we’re splitting up?” she called after her.

“If you don’t want to, that’s okay. We can stick together.” she offered. Saryn nodded.

“It would probably be safer. Not that there’s much in the way of that in this line of work but...”

“Take what you can get.” she finished. She walked up to the console and shoved her parazon in it, tripping the alarm. 

“And here come the Goldfaces.”

“...Lotus said Corpus.”

“Well, she was wrong.” Saryn raised her dual swords. 

Hildryn didn’t like the sound of that. But she had come for a mission, and so the Corrupted would get a mission. 

Outwardly, Saryn was calm, not showing the storm of emotion going on inside of her. She didn’t want to be here, fighting the Corrupted, but she didn’t have much of a choice now. They were always the worst enemies to deal with, and she wasn’t sure that she’d be able to keep her head above water. That, aside from it being on Lua. None of the warframes like missions on Lua, or in the Void, giving a collective feeling of the heebie jeebies, and she felt like her skin was crawling. She showed none of this, however. It wouldn’t help the situation, and she didn’t want Hildryn to feel sorry for her. 

The enemies came running at the sound of the alarm, and soon they were surrounded. They were coming from three directions, cutting off all sides but backwards. Hildryn and Saryn stood back-to-back, fighting at full stop. Hildryn had Larkspur on full blast, the beam melting it’s way through the crowd of enemies in front of her. Saryn’s Cyskis blades tore armor and gouged flesh, stained past the hilt with blood, almost slipping out of her grasp at times.

Slowly, they managed to cleave a swath of open floor, every inch hard fought and hard won. Together, though progress was marginal, they moved forward. Every time an enemy was downed, another would take its place within seconds, and though many were slain, more were coming to fill their spots. As if having to watch life support wasn’t bad enough.

Hildryn was absolutely thriving in the chaos. She watched the enemies fall before her, Larkspur melting or blasting its way through them, as she easily picked up the life support they dropped, and generally having a grand old time stomping through bloody puddles and shooting anything that looked at her funny. It was safe to say that she was thoroughly enjoying herself. Her defensive abilities were perfect for this kind of situation, keeping her from getting so much as a scrape, while continuing to dish out the pain.

Saryn, on the other hand, wasn’t feeling the thrill of battle. Rather, she was feeling like she’d bitten off more than she could chew, and was only trying to keep her head above water, so to speak. She was slowly falling behind Hildryn, her actions becoming slightly slower, less determined, almost as if she was losing the will to fight. Partially, this was due to sheer envy. Hildryn wasn’t bogged down by anything, not missing energy, not lack of skill, and definitely no emotional weight. The girl was absolutely flying, and seemed to not struggle at all.

Of course, she’d noticed a dip in her performance ever since the…”incident”, but it had never been this sharply obvious, since she’d always been alone. Now, with Dryn to compare herself to, she was a candle in the sunlight. She sighed to herself, ready to accept it. This was, it seemed, just another ugly facet of her punishment that had only now chosen to reveal itself. She had apparently managed to make herself so abhorrent that even decent battle efficiency was too much. So fine. Who was she to argue with karma? 

If Hildryn could admit anything to herself, it was that she was a bit slow on the uptake. That’s why she was wrist deep in the fight before realizing Saryn was flagging. It was subtle, but it was there. She had less life and effort in her movements, almost like she was tired, but more deliberate. Then she looked again and saw her slowly being driven, back to the wall, and not really doing anything about it. She immediately started running towards her, trying not to think about how little time she had to do something. 

Saryn was backing up against the swarm of enemies coming for her, slashing with her Dual Cyskis to keep them at bay. Suddenly, her back hit the wall, and her heart fell slightly. Maybe she wasn’t destined to make it out of this fight, she thought. Maybe this was it. Her swords slowly dropped to her sides, just for a moment, before throwing herself back into it, if only to not look bad in front of Hildryn. If she was going to die, someone had better take her out in a way that wasn’t as stupid as ‘getting swarmed by Corrupted while just standing there.’

Suddenly, the enemies in front of her were blown apart. She looked to the side to see Hildryn, gun quite literally blazing, blowing up Corrupted left, right, and center. She stepped back, a wave of relief washing over her, followed by regret. Not only had she not been able to handle her own fight, she’d had to rely on someone else to rescue her. 

“Are you alright, Saryn?” she asked, concerned. 

She merely nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

“Is something up? You seem a bit...dull.”

“I’m fine, I’m fine.” 

Hildryn shook her head. “You’re not. Look, things aren’t always going to be fun, or happy, or easy. But, I think that you’re better than you give yourself credit for. Just try not to worry about what others are thinking of you so much, and don’t compare yourself to them. Just focus on yourself, and you’ll be fine.”

“Easier said than done,” she answered cynically, but seemed to perk up, catching up to her in volume of enemies slain. As she mulled over Hildryn’s words, her mood improved, though she still just wanted to finish the mission. However, Dryn soon began seeing far more Corrupted covered in spores, decaying while still alive and spreading the malignance to their fellows. She smiled under her helmet, actually happy to have helped. The feeling surprised her, but Saryn was not nearly as bad as she was, or was made out to be.

There was hope for her, of that, she was becoming more sure of.   
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You did really well, Saryn.” Hildryn said, putting a hand on her shoulder as she turned to leave. She looked back, painfully aware of some of the others staring.

“I just did what I had to do, it’s nothing to praise me over.” she replied, trying to keep her voice down. 

“Regardless, you still did well, and it deserves some kind of recognition.” 

“If you say so.” she said dully. “Look, if this is some ploy to embarrass me, or get some secret, or you’re just doing this for laughs, you can drop the act. And if you’re genuinely trying to help...you might want to stop, it’s not worth your time.” She gave Hildryn a pointed, distrustful look before leaving, looking oddly tense. She blinked under her helmet, trying to process what she’d just been told. Saryn thought she was trying to trick her, or was just wasting her time.

_ Well, try telling that to the Lotus. _

Titania fluttered up to Hildryn, her tiny wings trailing sparkles.

“So you’re really doing it, huh?” Titania asked, in her small form’s squeaky, high pitched fairy voice.

“Doing what?”

“You know...helping her.” 

“It’s not entirely of my own volition, but yes, I am, and I’m going to keep helping her. She’s...actually not so bad.”

“Not so bad? You haven’t forgotten what she’s done already, have you?” Titania looked sideways at her.

“Of course not. But I mean...personality wise.”

“Her personality is more bland than a dried brick. Did you get hit in the head?” She fluttered over to perch on top of her helmet. 

“No. Also, have you ever talked to her, or did you just hear this through the grapevine?”

“...Yes.”

“Dammit, Titania.”

“What? She’d probably hit me with a fly swatter if I tried to talk to her.”

“Well, getting out of your pixie form might help.” Hildryn suggested.

“But I’m so adorable like this.” Titania responded airily, striking a dramatic pose on top of her head.

“You’re also a very easy target.” she raised her hand. 

"NONONONONO please don't." She squealed, wings flitting nervously. "I just want you to be careful. You have a good reputation, and you're quite nice, and I'd hate to see anything bad happen because of her." 

"Do you have some kind of bad blood with her or something?"

"Name a frame who doesn't!" she huffed, crossing her arms.

"Excalibur. Me."

"...Touché. if you must know, she turned her bitch switch on me one too many times. Not to mention all the crap she tried to pull with my Chroma!"

"You really love that dragon, don't you?"

"Him and his beautiful shiny gold prime ass." Titania gushed, sounding just a bit like she was drooling under her helmet. "Nobody tries to rip him off like he's Baro Ki'teer! I mean, he puts so much time and effort into going to the Void and trying to get decent cosmetics for everyone, and sells them much fairer-priced than Rhombus Head, and she tries to swindle him! How dare she!"

"Oookay. Well, yeah, that's true, but, for now, it really looks like she's trying to change."

"Hmph, we'll see. I might just start keeping an eye on her myself."

"Wait, what? Why would you do that? You're not going to try and screw with her, are you?"

"Pfft, of course not." She waved a hand. "I'm just curious is all."

"That'd  _ better  _ be all." Hildryn said, cracking her knuckles. Titania nodded furiously.

"Yes, yes yes, just curious, I promise." 


	5. Into the Vault of Shadows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saryn has dreams. It doesn't go so well.
> 
> Special thanks to JustIII for his help on this.
> 
> Please check the notes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter gets graphic. If you'd rather not read it, feel free to skip it, or to skip to "And then, Saryn woke up in her orbiter. Safe..."

Sleep wasn't always the peaceful haven for Saryn that it usually was.

Most of the time it served as a perfectly fine way to pass time and get away from everything. What else did she have to do, with everyone pretending she didn’t exist, or that she didn’t deserve another chance? The mind has many doors it can go through to escape from grief, guilt, and sorrow. One of them is sleep, which is by far the most reliable. To just pass out for a few hours, spend time in the blissful dark, feeling nothing, while the rest of you works to numb the experience, like putting rubbing alcohol on a wound. It stings, then it’s just cool and quiet. But with sleep came dreams, and those dreams were not always pleasant.    
  
She didn’t have so many dreams at first, but the more she slept, the more frequent they became. They weren’t so bad, usually pieces of extreme surrealism, events in her life twisted in some odd way, sometimes featuring her in strange but beautiful gold and white gowns woven from crystal thread. Sometimes she could dream lucidly and control them, usually taking herself to a beautiful local to let her mind unravel, like a field of white orchids, or a cliff by the sea during a sunset, with the sky in blazing colors like an artist spilled acrylic paints that ran and mixed. But, after the dreams came the nightmares. These started tame, at first, but quickly evolved into dances of red, painful violence and eerie, surreal fear. And it could always get worse.   
  
Saryn opened her eyes to the sight of the quartz-white, gold chased ceiling of an Orokin hall, shrouded in shadow. She couldn’t move anything but her head, and turning to look revealed little, albeit that this Orokin hall looked far more elaborate and important, complex ayatans spinning and whirling, nearly every inch having some kind of gold chasing, everything polished to a shine even in the shadow. Craning her head painfully, she looked to be on some kind of dais. Actually, judging by the extra detailed arch of gold and marble, it was more like an altar.

For what, she didn’t know.

She felt cold, and she felt sick. Something about this place made her scared, filled her with the kind of terror possessed by a hunted rabbit. But, unlike the rabbit, she had nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. Soon, she became aware of  _ something  _ watching her from a particularly dark corner. She couldn’t see it, but she knew it was there, and she knew it was there for her.

It was most likely that she had been the sacrifice all along.

She whipped her head around, looking for someone or something to help, to save her. But there was only the dark figure in the corner, the one she couldn’t even see, but knew was there, staring at her. She looked at her wrists and ankles, trying to find some kind of binding, but there was nothing, they were just stuck there.  _ She  _ was stuck there.

A metallic clap made her jump.

She immediately turned back to the corner the figure had occupied, but no longer saw it there. Panic filled her, and she looked around desperately. She tried to call out, scream, voice something, but she found that she couldn’t speak. Her throat felt like it was filled with a bar of lead.

Any sense of reason that she’d had left was gone in that moment. She completely surrendered to the terror, thrashing her head around in a feeble attempt to free herself from whatever was holding her. It was in vain; she might as well have been frozen in place. She stopped, feeling equal parts fear and stupidity. She might as well suck it up and take it. If it managed to be worse than things were already, she would let it do it’s thing. That was just impressive at this point.

Then the world went black. Abyssal black. 

It stayed like that for what felt like hours, the shade slowly seeming to creep into her very bones. Even the ayatans didn’t glow. There was nothing, not even the presence of the  _ thing _ . There didn’t even seem to be any temperature. Just...nothing. Then, just as suddenly as it had disappeared, there was light again. She was momentarily blinded, but her eyes adjusted before too long. And she almost wished that the darkness had remained. Standing at her feet, weidling a massive pair of golden forge tongs was...her. 

Saryn’s throat constricted, feeling like it was stuffed with dry cotton and sand. How fitting, oh how positively  _ appropriate,  _ was this? Of anyone, there was really only one person fit for this, one person who knew every single weakness and could hit her exactly where it hurt the most, emotionally, physically, it didn’t matter. Nobody else should be made to lower themselves to even touch her, so get the lowest of the low, get  _ herself _ to do it, instead. The thing looked at her. The helmet was off, wavy white hair flowing down her neck in a short tail, but her face was shrouded in shadow, only showing the barest hint of the pale skin underneath. She fastened the pincers around where her big toe would be under her armor, and slowly, methodically, squeezed them shut on it. Once they’d touched her foot, she kept adding pressure, still unhurried, which mounted, becoming painful, then unbearable. Then, she heard her armor crack. If the shade could make noises, she would have imagined it would hiss in delight. Suddenly, brutally, she opened the pincer and slammed them closed around her toe again, pressing the handles together as tightly as she could. Saryn would have screamed if she could, but it was like her mouth was sewn shut. All she could do was feel the pain, bright, hot, agony coursing through any and every vein and vessel and artery.

Then the shade pulled, yanked back with the kind of savagery a wolf uses to tear the hind leg off a still living deer. There was the sound of snapping bone, crackling metal, and tearing, Helminth infected flesh. The shade held up the chunk of metal, meat and bone, looking triumphant, dominant. It loomed over her face, cupping her cheek gently in one hand, before dropping the removed bit on the floor and turning back to her work. 

Saryn raised her head weakly, staring at the empty, bloody space where a piece of her had once been, her mind trying to disbelieve what had just happened. It was just...gone. It wasn’t there anymore, it wasn’t attached to her. It was lying on the floor somewhere, staining the gold crimson. Her brain was desperately trying to power itself off, to no avail.   
  


The shade put her tongs around the same place on the other foot, staring at her the whole while. She rocked and twisted them, pinching hard and pulling harder. More tearing, snapping, cracking. A clink as it hit the floor, accompanied by the silent drip of blood as it ran down her foot and onto the altar. This was repeated on all of her toes, or, what passed for them on a warframe, and she could do nothing. Just lie there and bear it. Once the initial covering of flesh and metal was removed, she could swear the shade looked giddy, with the bones of her foot exposed to the open air, and easy to access. She exchanged her forge tongs for something much slimmer, graceful even, with sharp points. The shade kept them closed as she inserted them in the leftover flesh from the previous toe, opening them and stretching it out once far enough in. She gripped the middle phalanx and pulled it out, Saryn wincing at the feeling of tearing cartilage and muscle. There was another clink as the bone hit the gold. She did this with the other foot. So it went, back and forth, all the bones in her feet, heels, and ankles were removed. Proximal phalanx, metatarsals, tarsals, talus, calcaneus, all of it, slowly, meticulously, purposefully. She listened to them clink, clank, and clatter every time they hit the pristine ground.

She felt nothing but the pain. She wasn’t even aware of the altar underneath her, of anything else around her. Just the pain. The smell of blood filled her nostrils, and her feet and ankles were little more than hollow sacks of flesh and metal. She looked over, at the bones and gore on the golden floor, and something welled up in her that desperately wanted out. The shade patted her head, like she’d done something good (for once).

And then, Saryn woke up in her orbiter. Safe, shaking like a leaf in a hurricane, adrenaline seeming to take the place of her blood. It was just a dream. Just a dream, just a stupid dream, just a nightmare, none of it was real, none of it happened, none of it was possible...

She screamed until her throat was raw, screamed so much yet it didn’t feel like enough. Her vocal cords begged for her to stop, and she eventually dissolved into helpless sobs, helmet off, white, tied up hair splayed on the floor behind her neck like seafoam. Her inky black scleras were cracked with bloodshot veins, amethyst irises bright with fear and sorrow, the pale skin around them red and puffy from the salt in her tears, the rest of her face not faring much better, red and blotchy and shiny from them.

_ “And that’s why Warframes weren’t meant to sleep.”  _ she heard a whisper, turning to see the shadow of her operator, Mari, flitting away, back to her room, sending her right back to square one.

“What happened, Saryn? _ -you look like you saw a ghost- _ Is there something wrong?" Ordis’s voice was jarring after nothing but herself for so long. She sniffled and looked up.

Well, of course there was something wrong. Ordis was cracked, not stupid, but social graces demanded he ask if something was wrong first, even though it was so blatantly obvious that even Kelpie’s fetus could have seen it. Something was terribly off with Saryn, and he was beginning to doubt the Lotus’s plan. Just a little bit. Surely it couldn’t involve this, wasn’t meant to involve this kind of distress.

She just shook her head. 

“Oh Saryn…” if he had had arms, he would have thrown them around her and hugged her tight. As it was, all he had was a voice and a will to help her. So he did, did the best he could, talking to her softly and staying online with her. That was all he could do, but it seemed to help, if just a little bit.

But sometimes taking the edge off was enough.


	6. Surface Tension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelpie goes out for a walk.

“Hey, Kelpie!”

She looked up from the fleshy bone she was in the process of stripping down, her long tongue wrapped around it, the taste of blood and meat in the back of her throat, to see Excalibur standing in the doorway, hand up in greeting, looking regal as usual in his chosen style. 

“Hello, Excalibur.” she said slowly, reminding herself that he was a friend, she could trust him. Trust, something she had in short supply these days.

“How are you doing?” he asked, walking inside and sitting on the edge of her tank, legs crossed. She finished up the flesh, cracked the bone in half, stuck the pieces into her maw and swam to him, resting her head and arms on the rim next to him.

“I’m...fine.” she replied carefully.

“Are you sure? You haven’t left the lab in a while,” he said, concerned.

“It’s been less than a week. It’s my shortest time yet, since I assume you’ve come to ask me out?”

“Well I can’t do that, Wisp would get mad.” He joked. Kelpie stared at her hooves in the water, embarrassed. “But I can ask you to come walk around for a bit. If you want.”

Kelpie was silent, her chin resting on her arms. In truth, she wanted nothing more right now than to just float in her tank, not thinking about anything. But, she also considered Excalibur to be her friend, and didn’t want him to be disappointed in her. She thought for a bit, her tongue working the marrow out of the bone she was chewing.

“I could, yeah.” she said finally, spitting out the empty bones.

“Great!” He hopped up, and held out his hand to help her out of the tank. She shook the water off.

“I’ll meet you outside.”

He nodded, then walked out. Kelpie wandered over to her shelf, running her hands over the treasures she’d pulled out of the various bodies of water she’d gone to with Alad after her initial trip with Tyl. From the numerous lakes, seas, rivers, and oceans of Earth, there seemed to be no shortage of strange, beautiful items resting on their sandy, stony, or muddy floors. Small, neat piles of gold coins, jewels and strings of pearls in various, vibrant colors that she’d spent hours polishing and cleaning from sea grime, shards of ancient pottery and tile with their glazes still bright, oddly shaped pieces of driftwood, antlers and skulls from long-lived deer and elk, bottles, lanterns, nets, shells, and a truly staggering collection of fossils that she had a serious knack for finding. Her two favorite items were displayed most prominently, framed by everything else. A massive conch shell, pearly cream on the outside, a soft, gentle pink within, and a locked black quartz box, inlaid with gold and mother-of-pearl, the slim, golden skeleton key to it resting close by, away from the several other keys she owned.

This place, this shelf, aside from right next to her father, was the one place she was happiest. She had earned these things, sometimes fighting hard to drag them out of their watery resting places into the light. She was proud of it, the one thing she’d truly managed to accomplish. It even made some of the others proud of her. Gara, who loved looking into ancient humanity, and Chroma, who just liked treasure, were more than happy to stop by and study what she’d pulled up and out, and even stone faced Mani gave an appreciative whistle. It was like her own private museum.

She ran her webbed fingers over the quartz box before running to join Excalibur. She passed her dad, hunched over his desk, tinkering with something or other, with Michi’s head on his shoulder. She snorted quietly. She definitely was not the operative’s biggest fan, but she made Alad happy, and as long as she didn’t overstep her bounds, Kelpie supposed it was fine. After all, she trusted her Dad. If he said she was alright, she would accept that, while also keeping her eyes pinned on the squid. 

She met Excalibur outside, slowly looking around, feeling uncomfortable, prickly, like someone was watching her, although she knew nobody really actually cared. They were focused on their own things. He tapped her muzzle, and she shook her head.

“What was that for?” she asked, feigning being upset. 

“I just like doing it, and your reaction is cute.” He patted her on the head between the ears, and she let him. “Are you ready?” he asked, his hand on her shoulder.

“I guess so, if we’re actually doing this.” she said softly, looking around like a nervous foal.

Excalibur patted her shoulder, briefly, before slowly leading the way. Kelpie walked along beside him, lost in her own thoughts. She couldn’t help but think about where she’d rather be, and what she’d rather be doing. But, he was right: she had to get out sometime. That didn’t mean that she had to like it, however. She was trying, she really was. She knew, deep down, she couldn't hide underwater forever. And she didn’t. She still went on missions when asked, this time wielding her Ooltha bladed zaw staff, Nuckelavee, doing well, even excelling. But she always came quietly back to her tank, choosing to not stay around and chat with the others. After Saryn, she really didn’t know who was genuine, and who was 

just tolerating her. At this point, she wasn’t sure that she wanted to find out. 

But, for now, she was with Excalibur. She knew that he was a true friend, as he wouldn’t have come by to take her out like this if he didn’t care about her. He was one of the nicest guys she’d met, and if he wasn’t taken, she might have tried her luck. But she still really only had moony eyes for one boy. Dakik. Grineer or not, Tubeman or not, he had officially, practically just scooped her heart up. And he still hadn’t given it back. She hadn’t been able to see him in months, just sent him the occasional message, and yet even with that time and distance, he still seemed receptive to her small attempts at flirting. Maybe, she hoped, that in the same way he’d taken her heart, he’d given her his.

She was shaken from her lovesick reverie by Excalibur being hug-tackled to the ground by a very cheerful ghost.

“Scally!”

He laughed, hugging the ghost back. “Ah, Wisp. I missed you.” She let out a happy noise.

“I was thinking about you that whole disruption. By the Lotus, it was a pain.” She floated next to him, twining her arm with his.

Kelpie stood back and let the happy couple chatter for a bit, slipping back into her thoughts, only to be violently dragged out again upon hearing the name of the Forbidden One. 

“...You...you were on a mission with... _ her _ ?” she asked Wisp, trying to keep the disgust and fear out of her voice.

“Yeah, her and Hildryn...damn, sorry.” Wisp answered, only now remembering her request to not bring up Saryn.

“It’s ok...what’s Hildryn doing with her!? She seemed really nice, too...how could she interact with someone like that?”

“Hildryn said she’s trying to change, and that she’s helping. Not entirely of her own volition, but she’s not upset to do it..”

”Hildryn better watch her back. What’s she like?”

Wisp paused to consider. “Well, she’s very withdrawn, for one. Doesn’t speak unless spoken to, which can really be awkward sometimes, and she just sort of does her own thing. She did her part, don’t get me wrong. But, it was almost like she was...in her own head, just not really aware of what was going on around her.”

“And what do  _ you  _ think of her?” she asked, starting to get heated, angry.

“I think that although she’s not in a good spot right now, she could change, even considering her past.” Wisp gave Kelpie a look, which Kelpie returned.

“She can’t change. She’ll never change, but you can believe what you’d like...wait, you said you just came back from a mission with her?”

“Yes, I did say that.” Wisp wasn’t liking where this was going.

“She’s not...still here, is she?”

“She might be, I’m not sure. If she is, I’m sure she’ll stay away from you. She wouldn’t risk it.”

Kelpie looked at Excalibur. He put a hand on her shoulder.

“We can go back, if you’d like.”

“N-no, it’s ok. I’m not scared of that bitch.”

Instead of answering, Wisp stepped forward and pulled Kelpie into a tight hug. She wrapped her arms around the ethereal frame, and nestled her head into her neck. 

“You’ll be alright, Kelpie. I promise.” She let go. “I’ll keep an eye out, and let you know if I see her.”

“Thank you, Wisp.” She turned and nodded to Excalibur. He gave Wisp another hug before joining Kelpie. 

Their walk was peaceful for the time being, talking with Excalibur’s teammates, between themselves, or with Harrow, who was delighted to see Kelpie out. He’d taken a liking to her, and was looking out for her in small ways behind her back. They also came across Hydroid, sitting in a fountain and humming, Nyx sitting next to him on the rim.

“Hydroid!” Kelpie called, waving.

“Lass!” he jumped out, splashing water everywhere, ran up and gave her a huge hug. “I missed yeh!”

“I missed you too, Hydroid.” 

“So, how are yeh doin’, now that yer back up on yer feet?”

“I’ve been...hanging in there.”

“Thas good, vereh good.” he said, patting her on the head.

“How have things been with you?” she asked, looking up at him. 

“The usual. '' He waved his hand dismissively.

“Making a gigantic watery mess.” Nyx said from behind him, sounding amused.

“O’ course, wha’ else dae yeh expect?” 

“I don’t know, maybe something less...moist?”

“Meh name is bloody Hydroid, ain’ it?” 

Nyx just shrugged. “True. But still”

Kelpie listed to their exchange delightedly, seemingly almost entranced by the playfulness of their responses to each other. They were quite close, it seemed, even when deeply entrenched in an argument. 

“If someone slips, tha’ is on ‘em, not meh.”

“Hydroid.” Nyx groaned, with the air of an exasperated daughter. Kelpie waved goodbye as Excalibur dragged her off. 

And everything was going fine, until Kelpie learned that Saryn was, in fact, still there. 

She saw her across the relay, sitting alone, her knees pulled up to her chest. Kelpie froze, feeling sick. Excalibur stopped.

“Kelpie, are you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Might as well be a ghost.” she said quietly, nodding her head towards Saryn.

“Ah, fuck. Do you want me to go tell her to buzz off?”

“No, I don’t want to have anything to do with her. Let’s just head back,” she said, taking a step back. 

Saryn looked up, snapped from her reverie by the sound of Kelpie’s hoof on the floor. She looked up, the thick cloak of sadness her heart had suddenly wrapped itself in giving way to a kind of fear almost on par with what she’d felt in her nightmare. Her blood turned to ice as her brain slowly started to scream at her to run.

They stared each other down, Kelpie floored by what she was seeing. Saryn scrambled to her feet, then turned and practically bolted away from her like a hunted doe.

Saryn was...afraid of her? Why? She had nothing to be afraid of. 

But she just kept running, all the while imagining what Kelpie’s jaws could do to her delicate throat if such an action took her liking. Better safe than sorry.


	7. Tell Your Parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mother(and/or Father) knows best except not in the evil stepparent way.

Hildryn was sitting peacefully for once, petting the head of her moa Rygge, grateful for the rare downtime. It had been a long few days. Helping Saryn, combined with the stress of not letting her get to her, was wearing on her, and she was happy for just this moment.

Saryn. What could she say about Saryn? She was the strangest person she’d ever known. On one hand, she was aloof, emotionally dark, and in need of serious positive attention if she was ever to truly change. But on the other, she was capable of great moments, her abilities monstrous and truly terrifying once you thought of the implications. And there _was_ good in her. She had seen it after those long missions alongside her, and though those times where she showed it were few and far between, she believed that they were growing more frequent, if slowly. Very slowly.

Despite this, she might as well have wrapped herself in a block of ice for how easy it was to talk to her. Oftentimes, conversations petered out to Hildryn simply saying random things that came to mind, making it awkward. Saryn didn’t seem to mind it, as she would almost always keep her silence, only speaking when she had something to say, or in response to a direct question. And physical touch? Forget it. She recoiled if you so much as held a hand out to her. All in all, she seemed to want to be alone, but was too polite to say so. Like she didn’t feel worthy of Hildryn’s efforts. For all that, however, Saryn didn’t always return directly to her orbiter after a mission. Sometimes, she would stay around Hildryn, not saying or doing anything, simply keeping her company, as it were. Of course, as soon as she was questioned, she left. But it was something.

_“Hildryn.”_ Lotus called to her gently. She snapped out of her thoughts and opened her communications, Rygge settling comfortably next to her.

“I’m here, Lotus. What can I do for you?”

_“I would like to ask how these last few days with Saryn have been. I know it’s a short time, but my curiosity has gotten the better of me.”_

Hildryn took a deep breath. “Things are going well enough, so far. She doesn’t talk much, but she seems to be tolerating my company so far. I’d like to get closer with her, as it does really look like she wants to change, and be better. She’s making it difficult though, keeping me at arm’s length and all.”

_“To be expected. I’m very grateful to you for doing this. I assume Saryn is...not your ideal choice of friend.”_

“She’s growing on me, but it would be much easier if she was more open.” Hildryn sighed. “Maybe with time, that will happen.”

_“Yes, time. How are the others taking her?”_

“Very coldly. Most of them won’t join us on missions, and the few that will hardly speak to her. As you said, though, to be expected. Saryn will need to meet them in the middle, however, if they’re going to give her a chance, at all.” She reached over, patting Rygge, who gave a happy, electronic chirp.

_“And she’s not thrilled about doing that?”_

“I’d say not. She hardly talks to me, let alone anyone else. Not that I blame her, but...she’s only making it harder on herself.”

The Lotus nodded, and Hildryn cleared her throat.

“If I may ask...why don’t you talk to her? She seems like she could really use it.”

_“I try, but she doesn’t want to listen. It seems she’s lost her trust in everyone, myself included.”_

Hildryn paused. “I...Forgive me for saying this, Lotus, but I can’t say that I blame her.”

Lotus seemed a bit taken aback, but not upset. _“Why?”_

“Well, respectfully, you’re the one who ousted her, and in front of everyone. She stood a chance to gain her ground back until you came. Not that it was the wrong thing to do, but...looking back, things could have been handled differently, in such a way that she didn’t lose all trust in everyone, and instead saw the error of her ways, and came back from that. But, it’s too late to worry about that now, really.” 

Lotus sat in silence for a long while, thinking hard.

_“You are...most likely correct, yes.”_ She said slowly. _“And I regret it now, looking back.”_

“Maybe you could send her a message apologizing? I believe that would go a long way in helping her frame of mind.”

_“I will try that, yes. I hope you are right. I don’t enjoy seeing her like this. I have been...too distant with her.”_ she said, seriously starting to reconsider her hands off approach with her.

“If I may, Lotus, I would advise not to send her more than a couple messages a day, if you can help it. Even less, if possible. She is very delicate right now, and I worry that she might get overwhelmed, otherwise.”

_“Nobody likes spam mail.”_

Hildryn nodded. “I wish you luck, Lotus.”

The Lotus gave her a motherly smile. _“Thank you.”_

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Dad? Are you busy?” Kelpie asked, peering around the doorway.

Alad looked up from the table, smiling fondly at her. “I always have time for you, Kelpie. What’s going on?”

“I need to talk to you about something.” she shifted her hooves nervously.

“Of course, what is it?” He walked over to her, putting an arm around her shoulders. “Is something wrong?”

“No, yes, well, kind of. It’s hard to explain really.”

“Well, just start at the beginning, and tell me what happened.”

“O-ok. I went for a walk with Excalibur, and everything was actually going really well...but…”

“But what? Did you start feeling bad? Do you need to lie down?” he asked, gesturing at the table.

“No, it’s not that. I ran into Saryn.”

Alad went silent at that, his face going stony, and Kelpie felt his grip on her tighten, as if he was resisting the urge to pull her close. Then, he gave in, pulling her into a hug, not saying anything. 

“Thanks Dad.” She said quietly, after a while. 

“Just go ahead and tell me what happened. I’m here,” he said, patting her shoulder. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“She didn’t really...do anything is the thing.”

“She...she didn’t? Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure. She...she looked scared. Of me...and then she ran away.”

Alad was quiet for a long moment. “Well...that is certainly a surprise. I never saw this coming, that’s for sure.” he took a deep breath, and then started laughing.

Kelpie paused, confused. Why was he laughing? Didn’t he know how serious this was to her?

“Dad?”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It’s just...after all she pulled, after all she’s done, _she’s_ the one afraid of _you._ I mean, your feelings for her go beyond simple fear. You loathe her. But her? She’s fucking scared of you. I just...it’s so ironic.”

“But...how could she be scared of me? She’s the one who did everything to me, I did nothing to her.” She folded her hands nervously in her lap.

“I’ll be damned if I know. It’s very strange.”

“Dad, what if...what if she’s planning something again?” She looked up at him. 

“I would say that’s the obvious answer.” He said, lounging back in his seat. “Nothing to worry about, everyone’s wise to her tricks by now, thanks to Nidus and Vauban.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” She looked down again, still worried. 

“Don’t worry Kelpie, she’s not going to be able to do anything to you anymore.” He unconsciously put his hand on Ragnarok. “I’ll make sure of it.”

“Thanks, Dad.” She gave him a shaky smile. 

“Besides, there’s no guarantee that she is planning something, anyway. She might just be scared of you, and that’s it. It’s possible that even being seen near you would be too much for her, and she’s worried that the others will think that she’s still up to her old games. Of course, that’s incredibly unlikely, but if, by some miracle of the universe, that 0.01% is taken, well, then she really would be scared of you. I’m still not gonna let her anywhere near you if you don’t want her, though.”

“Y-yes...please keep her away.” she said in a shaky whisper. Alad hugged her tightly again. 

“I will.”

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
Excalibur  



	8. The Observation of the Priest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gun priest gives good pep talks.

Time had passed slowly. So slowly that to Saryn, one day bled into the next, and she could barely tell the difference anymore. Long stretches of nothing were punctuated either by death-defying solo missions or the much less impressive, but all around safer, missions with Hildryn and whatever friend or friends she decided to bring along. She was, honestly, quite jealous of this, of the connections Hildryn had made, but given the choice between being stuck along with her, or having other people along for the ride, she would pick the latter, beyond the shadow of a doubt. The rest of her time was spent either desperately arguing with Mari, trying to patch things up, or trying, and failing, to talk to her “comrades”. So far, she’d tried to make things up with Mag (who slapped her in the face), Ember (the Glaive Prime hit her in the gut this time), Valkyr (those claws are  _ damn _ sharp), Nidus (she had a feeling he would have strangled her with his second pair of arms if not for Equinox), Vauban, (who’s rejection had been the most painful. She hadn’t realized how much she actually liked him until he hated her, even if he did steal her sugatra), and a few others, all with equally poor results.

But, she supposed it was too late now. Better to just keep moving forward and hope that one day, maybe she’d find a way to make them see she really did want to change. 

Even if it was taking forever.

She sighed, rousing herself from her reverie. How much time had passed? Felt like barely a few days, when it had been a month. Possibly two, she wasn’t quite sure. And yet, so little had changed that she could barely tell the difference. She didn’t know how long she could keep this up, at least without breaking. She wasn’t ready to find out, either. Something would have to change, and soon. But then, how often did wishes go through for her?

Across the relay, Titania was chatting with Harrow, passing the time. Eventually, as it often did, the conversation worked its way around to Saryn. 

“She’s really weird.” Titania said, her little wings flittering as they often did when she was excited. “It’s like she’s stopped caring.”

“Is she now? I must say, I don’t see how she thinks all this moping around will help,” the gun priest chimed in. “She shouldn’t let herself go like this.”

“I saw her going around, trying to talk to some of the frames, but they all just turned her away. I mean, I don’t blame them, but...still, ouch. You’d think that at least one would give her the time of day.” Titania replied.

“How do you know all this?” Hildryn asked.

“I told you I’d be keeping an eye on her, didn’t I?”

Hildryn paused. “Keeping an eye out or stalking her?!”

“...Yes.”

Harrow and Hildryn groaned. 

“Look, Titania, I know you think she’ll try something, but trust me. She’s nowhere near the way she was, and besides, you’re spying on one of our own, whether you like it or not.” She sighed. 

“It’s not cuz I think she’ll try something, I’m just curious. I mean, really, who puts in all this trouble trying to convince others she’s changed when all she’s getting is a kick in the shins. You’ve gotta either be really remorseful, or a masochist. Is Saryn a masochist by any chance, Drynie?”

“First of all, don’t call me that. And second, she’s not a masochist. At least, she hasn’t shown herself to be one. She definitely wasn’t one before the incident, so I don’t see why that would change.”

“Bah, you’re no fun. She may not be a masochist, but she’s definitely different.” 

“Of course she’s different, that kind of situation would mess anyone up!” Hildryn’s voice rose as she talked. “Just because you’ve never been there before, doesn’t give you grounds to judge her on. And it certainly doesn’t make you better.”

“Whoah, whoah, I never said it did.”

“It seems like you’re starting to like her, despite what you’ve said previously.” Harrow interjected. 

“Opinions change, that’s all. She’s trying, and if I’m the only one that’s going to help her, I will.” She gave the two of them a hard look.

“I would like to see her for myself.” he said, seemingly unaffected by Hildryn’s Shield Maiden Death Stare.

“I’ll invite you on our next mission, then. You’ll see plenty, I assure you.”

“I meant without you.” 

“W-what? You’re not planning anything, are you?” she asked, eyes narrowed under her helmet.

“Of course not!” He said, fingertips fanned over his chest in mock offense. “I, like Titania, wish to satisfy my curiosity, albeit in a far less creepy way. The best way to get a measure on Saryn is to speak with her, so that is what I shall do.”

“You sure Khora’s ok with that?” Titania giggled. He flicked her away, making her bonk into the side of Hildryn’s head.

“Of course she is, because she’s not a child, and she trusts me. Behave yourself, little one.” he said, taking out his thurible and swinging it casually. Titania returned to her normal form and pitch of voice.

“Alright, alright. I’ve got to go, anyway. Chroma will be expecting me soon.” The fairy-like frame walked off, waving over her shoulder. 

“That girl is going to get herself a meeting with the business end of someone’s hand one day.” Harrow said. “Or, more appropriately, a flyswatter. I hope to be there when it happens.”

“She’s got wit to spare, that’s for sure. She’ll probably be fine, her talking skills are through the roof.” Hildryn patted the priest on the shoulder. “I hope things go well between you and Saryn. Don’t lose your cool with her, and you’ll be fine.”

“I will see to that, thank you.”   
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saryn awoke, to the strange sound of the communications beep becoming more familiar. Then she saw it was Harrow, and her heart nearly stopped. She thought about not picking up, but decided against it. 

“Saryn, hello.” he said, in his usual, calm manner, his black-and-red Sahasa Kubrow, Ammit, curled in his lap. 

“Harrow.” she said quietly, trying to minimize the waver in her voice. “This is a surprise. What brings this call?”

“Nothing much. I’d just like to extend an invitation is all.”

“...Why?”

“Why not? You have been given a better review as of late. I’m interested to see if it’s true.”

“What’s the invitation?” she asked, apprehensively. 

“Just dicking around the Orb Vallis, nothing too strenuous.” 

Saryn considered the possibility. She did want to go, that much was true. But her level of trust was less than what she wanted it to be, and she wasn’t sure that he wasn’t planning something. 

“I don’t know, can I think about it?”

“Take your time.”

“A-alright, I’ll get back to you.” She ended the call abruptly. 

She had been asked to go on a mission by someone other than Hildryn. 

She just let that sink in for a minute, not really sure how to feel. In a way, it was what she’d been waiting for, this chance to prove something to someone else. But, now that it was finally here, she was having second thoughts. Did she really want to do it? What if she messed up, or was mistaken for doing something she actually wasn’t? She didn’t want to picture the implications. If by taking this outstretched hand, hers would be cut off? She didn’t know. She didn’t know if she wanted to find out.

She took a deep breath. None of this had happened yet. She hadn’t even made up her mind to go, yet, and she was already in her own head about what could go wrong with it. Shaking her head, she walked over to where Snowball, her kavat, was splayed out on the floor, and ruffled his pure white neck fur while she mulled her thoughts over. He purred loudly, brushing against her legs.

_ Just say no. It’s easier. You’ll screw it up. You  _ always  _ screw it up. _

She took a deep breath and returned the call. He picked up immediately.“Yeah sure, I‘ll join you.”

_ What was that, what the FUCK was that, Saryn? You had one, one, single job, and you blew it. Just say no. Just one word. Two letters. No. And what do you go and do? YOU GO AND SAY YES! You are so dumb, even Nezha would be floored by your lack of braincells. The first lizard that crawled out of primordial ooze is smarter than you are. The ghost of the first single celled organism to ever exist in this system is in awe of your bad decision. Did you think about this? Did you even give it five seconds? Come on, woman, you’re better than this, if only slightly! At this point, the only thing dumber than you is Vay Hek, and he’s a bucket of melted organs! I guess we just roll with it. _

She took a deep breath, clearing her head from her inner rant. This would be fine.

Harrow clapped his hands. “Excellent! I’ll meet you there then?”

“Y-yeah, sure.” she said, like she wasn’t screaming on the inside. “You mean now?”

“Yes, if you want.”

“S-sure, that’s fine.”  _ No it’s not, Lotus DAMMIT. Uuuuuuhuhuhuhuuugh. _

“I will see you there.”

He ended the call. She put Snowball into stasis, sat in the middle of her orbiter, and screamed.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Hey Saryn, glad you made it. Lovely weather we’re having.” he said, as they stood in the middle of a light blizzard. Light as in they could still see and hear, but heavy enough hat if it cranked up anymore, they wouldn’t be able to.

“It sure is. So, what did you want to do?”

“Talk, mostly. If we end up bashing some Corpus skulls along the way...well I see no issue.”

“Alright…” she said, trying not to sound too cautious. “What did you want to talk about, if I may ask?”

“You, and I know that sounds weird, but trust me. I’m just...curious about you.”

“W-what’s there to be curious about?” she huffed.

“You’ve been going at this for ages, with almost nothing to show for it. Why?”

“I…” Saryn wasn’t sure what to say. “I want to make reparations. If I get kicked or spit on along the way, I guess that’s just part of the punishment.” 

“Is that all? Really? You can be honest with me. I won’t think less of you.”

She looked down, watching her feet make prints in the snow, the storm having slowed into a gentle diamond dust of sparkling flakes. After a long time, she spoke.

“...I’m lonely.” She said simply. “And scared, and ashamed, and I…” She stopped herself. “I’m sorry.”   
  


“You’re alright, you’ve done nothing wrong-” 

“What!? Are you insane?!”

“-in trying to change, whatever your motive may be. None of them seem malicious, but of course, I can’t truly know your heart. I would like to give you the benefit of the doubt, just a little.”

“W-what? Why? I don’t understand.”

“What I’m saying is, I can see that you’re trying, and I’d like to help. That’s all.”

“Why!?” she asked, genuinely confused. “Why would you want to help me!?”

“Is that such a strange idea to you?”

“Yes! Yes it is! I am  _ despicable,  _ do you understand? I’m not good, and the fact that you’ve managed to share this many words with me is baffling.”

“Just take some deep breaths, okay? If I was planning something, I wouldn’t have come here to do it. My only motive here is talking to you so that I get my information from the source, and not through rumor and hearsay.”

She shook her head.

“Come on Saryn, just the mere fact you recognized that you had to do something different speaks volumes about you. You still think you’re all that?”

“Because I am! The only reason I had my wake up call is because I lost Nidus!” She sat suddenly, head in her hands. “Although I should have realized I could never have him.”

“Look, Saryn, it’s okay to-”

“It’s not okay! It was my fault, and now things will never be the same again, not even close! I’ll never be looked at the same way, I’ll always be ‘The one who did the bad thing, who can never change.’ That’s me, no matter how hard I try. I just wish I could disappear into the ether and never come back. It’s not like anyone would miss me anyway. Not even the Lotus could love me now. Nobody can.”

Harrow was silent for a long time, the only sounds being Orb Vallis around them. He wasn’t sure what to say, or do, and didn’t know if he should give Saryn a hug, or just walk away, or something else. Eventually, he went and sat down next to her.

“Saryn, I believe in you. The fact that you regret what happened is proof enough to me.”

He sat next to her, not saying anything, not touching her, just sitting. Eventually, she spoke.

“Thank you, Harrow.”

He reached out and patted her shoulder. “You can call me anytime, Saryn. I mean that. Someone else should give you a chance.”

She nodded wordlessly, and sat for a while longer, watching the snow drift gently down.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Harrow  
  
  



	9. Beckoning Abyss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No happy thought allowed in this brain
> 
> Repost

Things were going rather well, all things considered.

Saryn didn’t trust it one bit.

Nothing bad had happened, no one had come crashing down on her, and some of the frames had even started looking her way again. It was strange, and it was out of place. Her skin started crawling every time something went right. It felt unnatural.

And yet she desperately wanted things to continue as they were. Even her mood was slowly improving, something that hadn’t happened, not even just since the incident, something that hadn’t happened for a long time, even before that. She had been so used to being emotionally drained that she had just learned to operate in that state, but now, she was feeling something more positive, and it made her even more uneasy, skittish almost.

Part of it, she guessed, was because of her remaining guilt over Kelpie. She hadn’t said a word to her since her chewing out, and she knew it was wrong. She should have, at the very least apologized, as small a gesture as that was.

And so, she was sitting against a wall, watching Kelpie talk cheerfully with Umbra and her mother, seeming quite relaxed, unlike the last time they’d met. She told herself that things would be fine, that this was just something small. Taking a deep breath, she stood, and made her way over to the group, feeling slightly sick.

Umbra, noticing her approach, walked right up to her, blocking her way forward. 

“What do you want, Saryn?” He crossed his arms.

She forced herself to not turn on her heel and bolt like a frightened horse, her knees turning to jello. “I-I just wanted to...talk to Kelpie.”

“I’ll be sure to let her know,” he said, coldly. 

After a moment of just standing silently in front of him, she spoke again. “Please?”

Silence stretched between them, and finally, Umbra sighed. “I will ask her. Just...wait right here.”

Kelpie and Valkyr were both staring as he came back.

“What does she want?” Valkyr hissed, and if she'd had kavat ears, they would have been flat against her head.

Umbra shrugged. “She only said that she wants to talk to you, Kelpie. I told her I’d ask.”

“Why does she need to talk to me? Why can’t she leave me alone? Is she not aware that I hate her?” Kelpie asked, subtly scooching a bit closer to Valkyr. 

“Don’t worry,” Valkyr said, putting an arm across her back. “We’ll both be here, if you decide to say yes.”

Kelpie just shook her head and sat down, thinking.

“Would you like me to ask her why?”

“Don’t bother.” she said, clenching a fist. All this effort she’d made to avoid Saryn, and here she was, knocking at her door, so to speak. It made her angry. She hated Saryn. This was much deeper than your regular kind of enemy. If Kelpie was completely honest with herself, if Saryn kicked the bucket, she wouldn’t even give her a proper burial, just leave her out on a rock to rot. She wanted her to hurt in the same way she was hurting. Saryn deserved it, didn’t she? She wasn’t trying to change. It was all a trick, all a scheme. She was just tired of having no puppets to manipulate anymore, and Kelpie wasn’t the only one who felt that way. Mag agreed, and so did Nidus, to an extent. So why shouldn’t she get another dose of her own medicine? It was just karma.

“I’ll see what she wants.” Kelpie said finally. “Just...stay behind me, ok?”

“We’re with you.” Umbra nodded at her. 

She unclenched her hands and walked up to Saryn, who couldn’t help but deflate a little, seeing her beloved Melia sugatra hanging off her zaw.

“If you want it back, I’m not giving it.” Kelpie said, following her eyes and feeling fear starting to curl in her gut.

“I-I wasn’t going to ask.” Saryn looked down, fidgeting nervously.

“Then what do you want?”

“I…” she stopped. How could she say it so that it wouldn’t sound inadequate?

“Well?” Kelpie crossed her arms.

“I’d like to apologize, is all.”

Kelpie was completely lost for words. She had never expected to hear that specific sequence of words from Saryn’s mouth, and yet, it had just happened. She was immediately suspicious that she had something up her sleeve, some twisted, evil plan to get her to go along with what she wanted. 

“And you came up with that idea all on your own, did you?”

When Saryn didn’t respond, Kelpie continued. “You thought that after everything you did, you could just come and apologize?”

“W-what?”

“After all you’ve done, you think that...you can just say sorry, and things will be fine?!” Kelpie was outraged, but strangely...a very small part of her didn’t like saying these things, things that were very cruel, and felt out of place in her mouth, like she was chewing sandpaper.

“No, of course not! I’m not stupid!” Saryn protested. “But it’s the right thing to do.”

“The right thing to do would have been to never have done those things to me in the first place! And  _ now _ you want to come say sorry? You’re much more stupid than you take credit for.”

Saryn didn’t say a word, just stared at her.

“You know, it’s really funny that  _ you’re _ the one who’s afraid of  _ me _ . After all you’ve put me through, after all you’ve done to me, I really should be the one who’s afraid of you. But somehow I’m not. I just have this hollow, cold hatred for you.”

Kelpie would have gone on, if Ember hadn’t noticed what was going on, and came over.

“What’s going on, Kelpie. Is she bothering you?” she asked, indicating Saryn.

“She’s making a sad attempt at apologizing.” 

“Oh, is she?” Ember turned around, and yelled out, “Hey, there’s an idiot over here, come take a look!”

Then, she got into Saryn’s face. “After all, that’s what you are, isn’t it?” She backed up a few steps, shaking her head.

Saryn still kept her silence, looking at the floor. 

“Of course she is,” said Valkyr. “A reasonable person wouldn’t have even thought about it.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?!” she asked, trying to keep the waver out of her voice, despite the pit that was rapidly starting to open up in her heart.

“It means, Saryn, that you’ve gone beyond the voice of reason,” Umbra said. “It means that you can’t see past yourself, and you don’t recognize the emotional pain you caused to Kelpie.”

“I do though! That’s why I came here in the first place!”

“No, I think that you’re not telling the full truth. I think you came here for yourself, so that you could get it off your chest, and not because you thought that Kelpie might benefit from it,” he said, angrily.

“That’s not true!” Or, at least not entirely true. That was only part of the reason, really. She really did want to make things better.

The others on the relay were watching them now. Nidus had both sets of arms crossed, Vauabn looked like he wanted to hit her with his Fragor prime, and Garuda was flexing her talons, among others, who looked like they wanted to hurt her. Saryn was starting to get the feeling that she wasn’t necessarily welcome at the moment. They hated her. All of them. It truly, finally, completely hit her like a ton of bricks. They’d rather see her drown in Uranus’s frigid seas than improve, and be better.

Ember suddenly wound up and threw her Glaive Prime directly at Saryn’s head. It bounced off with a  _ thunk  _ and hit the floor with a metallic clank. She stared ahead, looking at nothing, not even a little surprised that it had happened.

Ember caught the flying weapon, expecting Saryn to jump at her, react, scream, do  _ anything _ . But she didn’t. She just stood there, shoulders slumped, looking like her soul had been sucked out. Defeated. In fact, the only reaction she gave was a heavy sigh, staring at the floor.

She looked up then, and silently, holding back the flood of tears under her helmet, looked around the gathered crowd, looked back at Kelpie with her stolen sugatra, and slowly walked off, trying to give nothing away. Not a word, not a whimper, as much as she’d like to lose it and retaliate, she knew it would do no good. Nobody cared. Nobody cared how much it hurt, or how much she wanted to change. They all thought her suffering was funny. That’s why nobody wanted to help her, wanted her to get better. Because it was entertaining. That’s why Lotus never helped her. Even Lotus thought watching her struggle like a fish flopping around on land was hilarious. That’s why she had no one. 

That’s why she’d always be alone.

So she stuffed her emotions in a bottle and left, because there was nothing for her here. She knew that now.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

By the time she got to a far enough recess of space that she felt relatively comfortable, she found a message from Alad waiting for her, only served to pour salt in her wounds.

She came back wanting nothing more than sleep. She felt weak and nauseous, and just wanted to surrender herself to oblivion. She hadn't realized how much the six months of rejection had been hurting her. Now she just felt tired. Dead inside.

And of course, she had to be dumb enough to check her inbox.

The message boiled down to this: “I don’t know why you keep claiming that you’re trying to change, but none of us here are going to take the bait. So whatever you’re planning, just give up. It’s not going to work. And if you really are trying to change well...you can’t. You’re too far gone, so give it up. If you ever go near Kelpie again, I'll blow your brains out.”

She simply nodded as she read it, tempted to ask him to do that anyway, her brain shutting itself off to deal with the grief, and sent him a single word in reply: "Sorry". Then she curled up on the cold floor of her orbiter, and hoped she wouldn't dream.

No such luck.


	10. The Witch and the White Veil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dreams are always fun ;]

Saryn really, truly missed her old self.

Her old self really was a lovely person. Kind, helpful, and sweet to a fault. Or, at least, that’s what she remembered. It had been such a long time ago, and everything from then was fuzzy. She remembered she’d had a lot of friends, and she never dreaded what the next day would bring. She shook her head, always, at the thought that she’d taken it for granted. How stupid she’d been then. How innocent.

She awoke to the same Orokin Hall as before, and her blood ran cold.  _ No, not here, anywhere but here!  _ She again found that she couldn’t move, aside from her head. Panic engulfed her, and she thrashed her head around desperately in a weak attempt to free herself. It didn’t work, of course. It wouldn’t work until that witch had had her fun. She looked around for the shade, but couldn’t see her anywhere, couldn’t even feel her. She looked down, and saw that her feet were intact again, bringing her a tiny amount of relief, even if they were about to be cracked like clamshells soon. 

Suddenly, the room went dark, plunged into nothingness again, and when the light came back on, the Witch stood in the doorway, holding her gold forge tongs. But this time, she had a friend. Someone she recognized.

This was her oldest self. Her innocent, kind, best self. No skins, no different colors. The base armor that the Helminth had originally cursed her with. She hadn’t taken to those things, back then, like some of her comrades had. Her helmet was off again, but this time her face shrouded in a gauzy ivory fabric that draped down to her collarbone, almost like a bridal veil. Saryn looked at her enviously. She was beautiful. What was she doing with the Witch?

The two shades walked single file around her altar, the shadow-faced one patting her on the head as she passed, and the veiled one gave her a pitying look that seemed painfully genuine. She shut her eyes, trying to wake herself up, but it was no use, especially once she felt the tongs clamp around her foot again. 

_ No, not this, not again! _

She tried not to watch, but couldn’t help opening her eyes just a little bit. The veiled shade looked like she wanted to stop the Witch, but was unsure, or just couldn’t. Saryn slammed her eyes shut again, just in time to feel the bite of the tongs, and hear the crack of her armor.

The clink of her bones dropping to the floor had become like the sound of water dripping. A constant tap, like a leaky faucet, or the sound of her blood rolling off the edge of the altar. Her flesh was once again empty, and she assumed she’d at least wake up soon. Then the pain would go back to being a bad dream…

She opened her eyes again, to see the Witch wrapping her hands around her hollow ankle. Terror gripped her once again, and she would have screamed if she had the ability. The shade squeezed her hands, showing her strength as Saryn’s armor cracked. She let out a hiss of pleasure and  _ pulled. _ There was the sound of tearing flesh, and her helpless fingers spasmed. 

This time, instead of simply throwing it to the side, she held it up for Saryn to see. She pressed her eyes closed as tightly as she could. There was a wet smack as it hit the floor. She felt the tongs slide into the flesh around one of the bones in her leg, the smaller, slender fibula, breaking the muscle around it, going in deep so the Witch could get a decent grip. She wriggled it a bit, disconnecting it from it’s inner workings, and with no warning, ripped it out. This time, when Saryn tried to scream, she was allowed to, her voice echoing throughout the hall. The veiled shade was sitting, back against the pillar, knees drawn to her chest, hands over her face.

_ “You’re too loud.” _

_ “Please, stop!” _

The veiled shade was looking at the Witch, who had placed a hand over Saryn’s mouth. She shook her shadowed head, before turning her attention back to Saryn’s insides. The bone dropped to the floor, clattering among the scattering of toe bones. She wrapped the tongs around the much larger tibia, repeating the process of wriggling and shaking, pulling and twisting to free it of the protective cling of her muscles. She seemed to smile under the shadow, listening to the sounds of her infested muscles tearing and cartilage popping. Then, she wrenched the bone loose, brandishing it proudly at Saryn, who felt bile building in the back of her throat. She wanted to throw up. This bone joined it’s fellows on the ground, and this time the Witch didn’t even wait, shoving her hand up the empty tube of metal and flesh, digging and worming around until she gripped another bone, her kneecap, and violently tore her arm back, gloved in blood past her elbow, triumphantly holding the bone. She held it up for the veiled shade to see, who turned away, covering her eyes. 

_ “One down, one to go.” _

Her right leg was slowly dissected by the Witch, her malicious glee becoming more apparent with every bone she took. She flaunted them like trophies of war, relishing the sound they made when they hit the gold. The other one just hid, even letting out a small squeal when Saryn’s other tibia was dropped. 

_ “Please, no more!” _

_ “You are such a baby.” _

The Witch waved at her, and she was once again thrown out of the hall.

The moment she awakened, she doubled over and threw up...whatever strange infested bile Warframes still had in whatever organ counted as a stomach. She couldn’t even bring herself to scream, instead shoving her terror and anguish into another container in the back of her mind. She cleaned up and sat in the back of her orbiter, Snowball curled in her lap, and made a couple decisions. 

_ I’m never,  _ ever  _ going to sleep again, no matter how much I want it, and whatever happens, I can’t go back. At least not now. _

Letting the loneliness grip her heart in it’s cold talon, and shutting off her communications, she opened her star chart, beginning to look for a place to go.


	11. Snow and Solitude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the snow comes the strangers.

Kuda Delgis was a completely normal Kuva Lich. There was nothing special about her, and even the weapon she carried, Chakkhurr, though one of the rarer weapons among them, wasn’t any sort of defining feature. 

She’d only ever had one target, the Warframe called Loki. It had been a long and difficult struggle for both of them, she’d take her tax, and he’d take down her minions. Eventually, though, the time came to battle for the final time, and though they both fought long and hard, Loki fought harder of the two of them, and had bested her. She knelt, defeated, expecting to feel his parazon between her shoulder blades, but instead, she got the surprise of her life. Loki reached out his hand, and helped her to her feet. He spared her, in exchange for coming to his aid in the future, when he should require it. He hadn’t even wanted her weapon. He just wanted to be friends. Over their months of warring, he’s come to like her quite a bit, and wasn’t willing to kill her for nothing.

To this day, she was very fond of him, and they were fast friends. She’d helped save his life multiple times in return, but still felt a degree indebted to him, and always would. But the odd Warframe was an exception to a rule that was very prevalent on Uranus: Warframes kind of sucked. It was the general consensus that nobody liked them, with the exception of Kelpie, who most didn’t consider as bad as her comrades, and Loki, who got a bit of a special status as her friend. Other than them, however, they were considered sea scum, but they didn’t come around to Uranus very often, let alone Titania. 

Kuda was on her rounds, deep in thought. She wasn’t expecting to run across anyone this time of night, especially not in a snowstorm of this magnitude. Despite how beautiful it was, to watch it drift down from the dark, it was also  _ cold.  _ Really, really cold. That’s why she was inside, watching through a window, and not out there in the thick of it. She was trying to shirk this part of her patrol, but, seeing as how she couldn't see a damn thing out there, she’d have to go and check. Heaving a sigh, she pulled her helmet over her short, black ponytail and headed out.

Saryn stood on the edge of the above-water platform of Titania’s sealab, eyes glued to the sky as the snow fell gracefully. It was a breathtaking sight, watching the delicate little flakes appear suddenly against the velvety black of the night. She had been coming here for about a month now, isolated as it was, and she probably wouldn’t have stayed if not for the night snow. It made her happy, at least a little bit. It served as a very nice distraction to whatever was going on in her world. While she was here, she didn’t have to worry about the other frames judging her, or what they might be thinking, or seeing them turn and walk the other way if they saw her coming. Even Mari’s scorn seemed farther away.

It was paradise. A wonderfully cold, sparkly, snowy paradise. She felt light as a feather, for the first time in months, and she stepped and twirled, watching herself make footprints in the fresh snow.

Kuda walked forward, squinting her eyes against the snow, when she saw some red lights grouped together. Moving towards them, she was able to make out the dim shape of a figure, moving on the edge of the platform. Getting closer still, she was finally near enough to make out who it might be. At first, it was hard to put a finger on it, but when it clicked, her heart stopped in her chest. 

Warframe.

She backed up slowly and ran back into the safety of the lab, breathing hard. Reaching the relative safety of the indoors, she checked over her shoulder to see if she’d been followed. She hadn’t. So, that was the first issue taken care of. But there was still another major problem that needed a swift and decisive resolution. 

There was a Warframe in the compound. 

Giving it about two seconds of thought, she bolted back down into the lab, looking for Tyl Regor. She found him in a room, talking to Danya softly.

“Commander!” She slid to a stop in front of him, gasping for breath. “There’s-I-Warframe!” 

“Delgis, please calm down and try to put the words all in a tidy row, yes?” Tyl looked over at her. “What’s this about a Warframe?”

“I saw one, here! There’s a Warframe here!” 

Tyl stood up, giving Danya a pat on the head. “Go find Dakik, Dany. I’ll send for you when it’s safe.”

“But Dagh, I wanna see you beat up the Warframe!” she pouted cutely.

“I know, but it's dangerous. Go.”

She didn’t argue, just nodded and left. She knew it was pointless to try when he thought her safety was at risk. 

Tyl nodded to Kuda, and she led him through the hallways to the platform where she’d seen the frame. Luckily, the snow had slowed somewhat, and they could see out to the water. The Warframe was still there, just staring at the sky. Tyl clenched a fist.

“What’s the plan, Commander?” Kuda asked, looking up at him. “Think we could take her together?”

“Possibly, but I’m going to try and resolve this calmly first. If that doesn’t happen, well...keep your Chakkhur loaded.” He paused for a moment. “Has she been violent at all, that you’ve seen?” 

“No, not that I’m aware of. But, that doesn’t negate the possibility.”

“Alright. Be sure to stay on your guard.” 

“Will do, Commander. I’ve got your back.” she said, nodding to him, saluting.

The door was nearly frozen shut, but they got it open. The cold hit like a sledgehammer. Tyl walked remarkably silently, the snow cushioning his footsteps. Saryn didn’t notice, engrossed as she was in her own head. It was so peaceful. Quiet. It was finally quiet-

“What are you doing here, lizard?” Tyl said.

She stiffened, and turned around, slowly, backing up a few steps, her feet mere inches away from the edge. Seeing this, Tyl backed up a safe amount, as well.

“I only want to know who I’m dealing with, is all. No need to make any hasty decisions.” He made a placating gesture.

“I’m sorry.” She said, her voice high and shaking. “This was the best place I found.” she clasped her hands in front of her and hung her head.

“The best place for what? I must admit, I am curious as to why a Warframe would choose to come to my labs, instead of staying with their own pack of vipers.”

She desperately wished she had more room to back up. “I can’t!”

“Why’s that?”

She shifted from one foot to the other. “I…” she choked. “Nobody wants me around, and so I came here.” she said, clenching her fists. “Even if it is my own stupid fault.” 

“One of the lizards screwed up so badly she’d been ousted, eh? How’d you manage to pull that off? I thought you all reveled in being scummy.”

“T-that’s not something you need to know, Regor!”

“Isn’t it? Then why have you come to  _ my _ lab, if you don’t see fit to answer my questions?”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I just can’t answer this!”

“And why’s that? Is it too uncomfortable? Kind of like the situation you’ve put me in, right now?”

“I wasn’t trying to! I’m not here for anything in your stupid lab! I don’t care about that, or your stupid Tubemen. I’m...I’m here for the snow.”

“That’s all?” Tyl sighed. “Look, the way I see it, there are two options. One, we can fight, which would be long, tedious, and would end with one of us dying or limping away and feeling stupid. Or two, I let you go, and you don’t come back.”

Saryn was silent for a moment. “Is there no option where you let me stay, and I promise to not mess with anything?”

“Why the hell would I let you stay?” 

“I just want to see the snow, that’s all! It’s not the same on other planets, where my colleagues like to crawl about. It’s quiet, and I’m all alone and can watch it drift and fall on the waves. The snow makes me happy, and I haven’t felt that in so long…” she trailed off and shook her head.

Tyl took a deep breath, thinking. After some time, he spoke. “If I let you stay, what do you have to offer? I can’t just take your word that you’ll behave.”

“I’ll show you my face.” she said, without hesitation. His eyes widened. That was...an extreme gesture. Kelpie had told him once, about how sacred a Warframe’s true face under their helmet was. They only showed it to incredibly close friends or a significant other. A Waframe’s face, the remnant of what they truly were. 

“That's quite the offer.” he said, floored.

“It’s all I can really give. I’ve got nothing else. I assume...having a secret like this...what I really look like under here…” She tapped her helmet. “If you wanted, you could take a picture and release it to the whole System. Show everyone the most pathetic Warframe that’s ever been made. It’s the perfect blackmail for you. If I misbehave, you can out me to anyone you want.” 

“Show me, then.”

He wasn’t prepared for what he saw.

She was...remarkably pretty. Her hair and eyelashes were as white as the falling snow, her skin pale and smooth as porcelain, not touched by the Infestation in her blood at all. Her eyes though...they were...creepy. Her irises were fine enough, amethyst purple, but her scleras, the part that was usually white, were black as pitch, or tar. Other than that, she was completely normal, human, Orokin, whatever she was, or used to be. Her expression was hollow, sad, like she’d given up on something big, and was haunted by it. He'd seen that look before, on soldiers whose bases were more subject to Warframes attacking. That hopeless despair of watching everything around you die.

She looked away, finally, a bit embarrassed by his attention. He put a finger under her chin, making her look up at him. She flinched at the touch but didn't shy away.

Kuda's jaw was on the floor. She had never known that Warframes had faces underneath all that metal, and now she wasn’t sure to think.  _ What else might they be hiding, if they could keep that big of a secret to themselves for so long, _ she wondered.

"Is this acceptable?" she asked quietly, looking up at Tyl. He nodded, and let go of her face. She didn't replace her helmet.

"Just one last thing." He held up his hand as she looked like she wanted to protest. "It's nothing bad, calm down. What's your name?" 

"O-oh. My name is Saryn." she said, almost at a whisper. "I can stay then?"

“Yes, you may stay, as long as you don’t interfere with anything, and stay on this outdoor level  _ only. _ If I catch you inside, I'll cut you in half."

Saryn nodded, and bowed at the waist, showing respect. She was so relieved that she could stay, she couldn’t feel threatened by what he’d said. Not that she would go inside, after he’d shown her this kindness.

"Thank you." she said, moving away from the edge.

“You’re welcome. I sincerely hope that I’m not making a mistake by doing this. Don’t give me reason to doubt, and things will be fine. Fair?”

Saryn nodded again. “Yes, that's fair. Thank you, again.” 

He nodded and headed back in. "You coming, Delgis?"

"I'll follow you soon."

Then it was just Saryn and Kuda, who was glaring at her.

“So, Tenno. What’s your  _ real  _ plan here? I’ll confess, I’m surprised you managed to fool the Commander with that sad little lady act of yours, but you  _ never  _ fooled me.” she said coldly, fingers twitching towards her Chakkur.

“What ‘real plan’ are you talking about?” 

“You know, the plan that you’re keeping to yourself because you think that no one has the foresight to be able to spot it. That plan.”

“The hell are you one about?”

“Look, I know you’ve got some sort of plan, where you’ve been sent to infiltrate us, or whatever. It’s not going to work, so you might as well just leave.” Kuda was getting angry.

“ _ What?  _ What the hell is wrong with you! Like I told your boss, I’m here to be alone, not to touch whatever he’s got brewing down there. I don’t care! In fact, you’ve single handedly managed to ruin  _ everything _ .”

“Me?  _ Me?  _ I’m not the one trying to pull the wool over the Commander’s eyes! What did I do?”

“You fucking told him, that’s what! I wasn’t doing anything, just standing outside and watching the sky! You could have just left me alone! But nooooooo. You had to go and tattle to like a child who wants to get someone they don’t like in trouble. Tyl didn’t have to know! I’m not, and never was, planning anything. But instead, I had to show him my face, my fucking face, just to keep coming here and standing!”

“I reported you because that’s my job, my duty. I did nothing that I shouldn’t have, and besides, if one of us was to come to your relay, we’d be dead in minutes. I think that you should be thanking me for not blowing your pretty head to pieces.”

Her face fell, and she nodded before jumping down behind a crate and leaning against it with her knees to her just, shaking.

Kuda snuck around the side of the crate she’d seen Saryn disappear behind, curious as to what she was doing. Peering around the corner, she saw the frame with her head in her hands, crying silently. Kuda sighed internally, knowing that she’d gone too far. She looked up at the Lich, her black eyes laced with red veins.

“I’m sorry. Of course, you were only doing your job. Please, I-” She choked. “-didn’t mean it.” 

“Look, I suppose I’m just used to Warframes being schemers and strategizers. The majority of you, anyway. I’m sorry,” she said, holding out a hand. The frame hesitated, but took it after a moment.

Kuda helped her to her feet. “I’ll leave you be. I have responsibilities, anyway.”

“A-alright. I’m sorry, again, please…”

“It’s...it’s ok.” Kuda replied, patting her shoulder. “I can’t blame you for defending yourself, even if you were a bit rude.”

Saryn nodded slowly, wiping her eyes. “Thank you.”

“Anyway, like I said, I’ll leave you alone. I’ll be sure that nobody comes out here, alright?”

“A-alright….but you can still come out here...if you want.”

Kuda was taken by surprise at the frame’s offer. “Thank you, uh...later, maybe. After I’ve completed my rounds.”

She gave her a small smile, and turned back to the snow.


	12. Dark of Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Slow and steady makes friends with the Warframe

Kuda was surprised at just how normal the Warframe’s presence had become. In the span of a couple of weeks, she’d grown used to seeing the frame out on the platform, in any sort of weather. She wasn’t there everyday, but there was a nine out of ten chance that she’d be there, just staring out over the ocean. The Lich itched with curiosity to try and uncover her secrets, but that was more likely to drive a wedge between them. If she wanted answers, she’d have to get on Saryn’s good side.

Most of the time, Saryn only wanted to be alone. But, every once in a while, she’d invite Kuda out to talk with her. She’d always steer the conversation away from herself, only giving vague answers, and making it clear it was not something she wanted to discuss. She still came around anyway, because it looked like she needed a friend, and her boss turned out to be remarkably curious about what the frame had to say. He was already well aware of her less than stellar past, thanks to Kelpie, and wanted to know more about what had really happened between them. He had been surprised that Saryn was repentant. Him and Kelpie, while not being the best of friends, were still close, and his feelings towards Saryn had been...hostile to say the least, but meeting her, seeing that she actually felt remorse and a need to atone? That was heresy.

So here was Kuda, still attempting to crack her armor, so to speak, and get her to open up a little, even if it was just her going on about her blatantly obvious misery. It had been two weeks of almost nothing, but today, she had a good feeling about. 

It was still bitterly cold, but clear, and Saryn was in her usual spot at the very edge, her legs dangling over the side, watching the waves. Kuda sat next to her, legs crossed. Saryn didn’t seem like her regular self, and seemed to be very deep in thought, disturbed even. 

“Hey.” Kuda said, snapping her out of her trance.

“S-sorry, I didn’t notice you. My brain feels overstuffed.” the Warframe said softly, the breeze playing with the wavy strands of her white hair that had fallen out of her tie.

“Anything you care to talk about?” Kuda asked, scooting a bit closer.

“I-” She sounded like she was about to refuse, but stopped herself. “You know what? Yeah, I would like to talk about it. Out of everything wrong with my life right now, this comes closest to being the worst.”

Kuda was taken aback. She had mostly asked out of habit, but now, she was fully invested in whatever the frame had to say. “Why would you say it’s the worst?”

“Because, unlike most things, I can’t get away from it. Even if I don’t sleep, it lingers in my memory, and even time won’t dull it, like it usually does.”

“What is it?”

“Quite pathetic, actually. Nightmares.”

Kuda was quiet for a moment. “I don’t think that’s pathetic at all, for what it’s worth.”

“I should thank you for that then, but it is quite sad, a Warframe, of all things, being brought low by some bad dreams.”

Instead of replying, Kuda put an arm around her shoulders. Surprisingly, she didn’t shrug it away as she usually did, but let it stay there. The Lich wondered just how traumatizing these nightmares must be, if she was allowing this much contact.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what are these dreams about? If you remember them, that is, and not just the emotion that came with them.”

“I do remember.” She began slowly. “I remember everything. Every awful moment, I remember it.” 

“That’s...unusual. You don’t really remember dreams after you wake up. Are these that significant?” 

She nodded. “Sometimes...when I’m all alone...I can still hear it...the tearing, cracking, and crunches of my own body being taken apart from the inside out, constantly replaying, over and over and over, everytime I close my eyes, that’s all that’s there. I can’t stop thinking about it,  _ her.  _ Holding up my bones in front of my face like some kind of trophy...my own blood dripping across my face and chest...it’s all just a game to her. I don’t know why she’s come to haunt me, but she won’t leave me alone. I can’t sleep anymore, if I sleep, that’s when it comes and gets me.” her voice got quieter and quieter as she went one, her eyes darting around. 

“Is it that bad?” Kuda asked, her voice almost a whisper, and feeling rather dumb. Of course it was that bad. “Who's she?”

“The Witch.” Saryn said dully, shivering. “She comes and...doesn’t stop until she’s satisfied. It gets worse every time...she keeps going further, and I worry that...when she gets to my head, my skull...I am going to rot from the inside out. There won’t be anything of me left.”

“What is it she does that’s so horrible?” Kuda couldn’t help but ask.

“She cracks me open and takes out my bones. She always has some kind of tongs or pliers, makes me gape and bleed, then takes out my bones. She got farther this time. First it was my toes and feet and ankles. Now she took not only that, but my lower legs and my knees. I can’t sleep anymore, or she’ll keep going and going. She’ll take my upper legs, my pelvis, my ribs and spine, she’ll take my fingers and arms, shoulders, collarbone, until she finally breaks my head and I’ll be too far gone. She’s taking me apart like a jigsaw puzzle in reverse and I can’t get her out of my head. The worst part is that she looks like me, veiled in a shroud of shadow. I am taking myself apart, bit by bit, night by night.”

Kuda thought for a moment. “Well, I’m no expert, but...given your past, is that something that you think you deserve?”

“...Yes. Of course I do. If I can just redeem myself before she gets to my head, then my life will have had some meaning before I lose it completely.”

Suddenly, she was surprised by Kuda wrapping her arms around her, tightly. She almost rejected it, but somehow, she couldn’t bring herself to, and simply accepted the embrace. She quivered, feeling her eyes starting to sting.

“I-I’m alr-right.”

“No, you’re not.” Kuda didn’t let go, settling further into the hug instead. 

“I’ll be fine.” she said, voice cracking.

“Save that for later. Just let me help,” she said, still not letting go.

“I will never be worth the effort you put into that.”

“I’m not asking you to be.” Finally, Kuda released her. “But you can try, and that’s worth it to me.”

She said nothing, just looked away in shame, and let the wind begin to dry her tears.   
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Commander?” 

“Yes?” Tyl turned away from his experiment. Danya was sitting next to him on a barrel, worshipful as always.

“I found out something about Saryn today.”

“You actually got something out of her?”

Kuda nodded. “Just to let you know beforehand, it’s not pretty. But, I think it sheds some light on why she is the way she is.”

“Is she starting to warm up to you, or was she just desperate to spill this to someone?”

“I like to think she’s warming up, but it’s probably a little of both, if I’m honest. Not that I blame her.”

“What did she tell you, then?”

“Well, she’s having a recurring nightmare, in which a shade that looks like her deconstructs her from the bottom up, going further every time it happens. As in, cracks her armor open, then removes the bones, and so on.”

“Disturbing.”

“She’s also given said shade a name.”

“Oh?” Tyl looked up, interested. “What is it?”

“The Witch.” Kuda said, feeling like she was saying something foul.

“Indeed? I wonder how she got that name.”

“Damn, I should have asked.” She sighed. “So what do you think?”

“Well, it seems to me that she’s subconsciously punishing herself, which is understandable. It could also be related to stress. If you’re under enough of it, it can give you nightmares, that I know for sure.” He said, and she would have sworn she saw him shudder. “Now my interest is quite piqued. Keep an eye on this, will you?”

“Maybe you should let her in and talk to her yourself?” Kuda suggested.

“Not a chance, at least not yet. I can’t be the judge, jury, and Rathuum executioner, because it’s not like my past is squeaky clean, not with how badly I screwed up with Fenrir, but still. I would like to know more, don’t get me wrong. She both inspires pity and intrigues me in a way beyond just scientific curiosity.” 

“Well, I think that you should at least talk to her again. I believe that would do some good for her.”

“Maybe,” Tyl said, taking a long pause. “Thank you for telling me, Kuda.”

“Not a problem, Commander. And...whatever happened with the Wolf-Fenrir, wasn’t your fault.”

He gave a rueful smile under his mask. “If only that were true.”


	13. Gift of the Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashbacks are fun and games until they hurt.

Saryn had been absent for a while, and Kuda was starting to get concerned.

She’d failed to return the day after she had told the Lich about her nightmare, and she couldn’t help feeling like they were connected somehow. Tyl said that she most likely just had her own things to do, and he was probably right. But he might not be. So, she checked everyday, and everyday, she wasn’t there. Kuda couldn’t shake the thought that maybe she’d been too pushy, and had driven her off. 

So it was a massive weight off her shoulders when, today, she found the frame in her usual spot. In the pouring rain. Uranus’s weather could jump from snow to rain and back again in a heartbeat, and today it seemed like the sky needed a good weeping session, hard enough that Tyl had decided it might be best to lock down the lab to prevent flooding. She had tried to leave it alone, she really had, but her hope won out, and she’d gone to check, and there was Saryn, helmet off as usual, hair plastered to her head by the rain.

“Saryn?” 

The frame spun around, then saw Kuda. “Oh, hello.” Her voice was nearly drowned out by the thrumming of the rain, like millions of strings of glass beads being shaken and dropped. 

“It’s been a while, did something happen?” Kuda walked up next to her. 

“Nothing out of the ordinary, no.”

“Do you want to come inside and talk?”

“I can’t.”

“What do you mean?”

“Regor said I’m not allowed in the lab.”

“Oh, come on, it’s soaking wet out here. I’ll take responsibility,” she said, holding out her hand. 

“I’d rather you not get in trouble.”

“And I’d rather you not be stuck out in the wet and cold.” She crossed her arms.

“That’s very nice of you, but I’ve been...I’m in, worse. It’s fine.”

Kuda thought for a moment. “Look, don’t go anywhere. I’ll be right back.” She turned on her heel and marched back into the lab, directly to Tyl.

“Commander, Saryn’s out there in this storm, so can we invite her inside?” Kuda barged into the room, not even knocking on the door.

“She’s back?” 

“Back and sitting in the rain.” 

“Hm.” Tyl leaned back, thinking. “Do you think she’s causing any sort of disturbance?”

“No, I think you should let her come in. It’s pissing rain out there, come on!”

“Are you insane? Kelpie is one thing, but she’s a normal Warframe.”

“What do you think she’s gonna do, come in and just start killing things?” she threw up her hands. 

“You never know with Warframes!”

“You’re supposed to be the smart one!”

“And you’re supposed to see the potential danger in this decision. We can’t trust Warframes. Not one. What they’ve done to my work has proved that, time and again. It’s a risk that I am not willing to take again.” 

“What they’ve  _ tried  _ to do. They’ve never succeeded. And if that’s the case, why are you letting her stay here in the first place? You think she couldn’t find a way in if she wanted?”

Silence stretched between them. Tyl didn’t want to admit it, but Kuda was correct. Saryn would have found a way in if she had wanted to. 

“...Wait here.” he said quietly. Kuda nodded, and sat on a barrel next to Danya, who was staring out a window at the fish darting by. 

Tyl made his way through the compound and out the door leading to the outer platform Saryn was sitting on. The rain drummed on his armor, and Saryn turned around, her purple eyes looking hollow, but she gave him a small smile anyway. He couldn’t help but notice how much nicer it made her face look. 

“Hello, Saryn.” He moved next to her. “What’s brought you here?”

“Hello Regor. Nothing much, just needed to wash the Infested blood out of my hair.” 

“Looks clean to me,” he said, musing. “I have a sneaking suspicion that it wasn’t that bloody.”

“Ah, caught me. I don’t fight with my helmet off. You really are as intelligent as they say.” 

“Maybe, maybe not. If I’m as smart as you lizards seem to think, I would have realized that you’d be better off inside, and not out here,” he said, looking up at the dark clouds.

“I would have come in, but you said I couldn’t. I didn’t want to tread on your hospitality any more than I already am.”

“I insist, call it a lapse of judgement on my part.”

“Oh.” She said simply, looking down at the water. “Well...if you’re ok with it.”

“I am. I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t,” he said. She nodded and slid off the railing. 

“Thank you.” she bowed to him and walked in.

Kuda was waiting inside the door, and gave Saryn a pat on the back as she came inside. She flinched, before nodding to her. 

“So, why did you really come here?” Tyl asked her, as they made their way back down into the lab.

“Do you mean this time specifically, or just in general?”

“You were gone for a while, so this time. Is something more wrong that usual?”

Saryn looked down at her feet, her arms crossed under her torso. “I...had a talk with an old flame, and now I don’t know what to think.” 

“Maybe I can help work it out,” Kuda offered. “What happened?”

“Well…”

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   
“Hildryn, we’re friends, and usually I trust your judgement but...why did you bring Saryn along?” Equinox hissed in the shield maiden’s ear, her Tipedo prime clutched tightly in her hand as they made their way through the Infested-wrapped hallways.

“She’s not nearly as bad as everyone seems to think, and besides, she needs to go on missions.”

“With us?” Nidus asked. “Come on.”

“I know, I know, it’s not my best idea, but I had to get her out. She’s been gone for a week.”

“You could have at least warned us first.”

“Against what? That the frame nobody likes for invalid reasons is coming? Come on, it’s been months, and she isn’t the way she used to be.”

“I know you’ve come to like her, and as questionable as that is, I won’t judge you for that, but our reasons aren’t invalid.” he put a glassy arm on her shoulder, and she sighed.

“Maybe not, but you should see the effort she’s put into changing. She’s really trying.”

“I have seen it, but...do you really believe it?”

“I do, and I don’t see how you, and everyone else, don’t.” she huffed. 

“I’m surprised you trust her as much as you do. You’re normally one for caution.”

“I’m surprised at it too, actually.” she said, shooting an Ancient in the face with Larkspur. “If she is faking it, she’s doing a very good job.”

“It is strange how she did nothing that time with Kelpie and Ember.” Equinox interjected. “That doesn’t seem like the kind of thing she’d lay down and take, act or no.”

“Like I said, she’s changed. Let’s get this mission over and done with, then we’ll talk about it, alright?”

And so began the infested smashing in earnest. It was relatively simple, as far as survivals were concerned, and it should have gone smoothly, if Nidus hadn’t opened his big mouth and stuck both his feet in it.

At least in Saryn's opinion.

The two were alone, fighting Infested as they filtered into the room, lined with raided lockers and Infested growths. Saryn was trying to keep to herself, and not bother anyone. Not Hildryn, not Equinox, and especially not Nidus, and yet here she was, in the same room with him. The enemies had let up their attack for a moment, and he turned to her, the eyes on his shoulders staring.

“I want to ask you something.”

She hesitated. “What is it?”

“A few things, actually. Do you still hold feelings for me?”

“...Why are you asking?”

“There are things I need to know about you, and this is one of them.”

“No. I don’t love you anymore. I don’t think I can even feel love at this point.”

Nidus raised an eyebrow under his helmet.

“It’s better for me to not even try to feel it.” She shook her head, as if clearing it. “What else?” her voice was dull, detached. 

“Are you really trying to change?” 

“...You have to be joking.” she said, looking straight at him. “Please tell me this is a joke. I’d rather have you goofing on me then have that question be serious.”

“Well, I suppose that’s my answer then. Sincere or not.”

She ground her teeth under her helmet.

“Do you want to change? Or are you just doing this out of obligation?”

“Why do you even want to know?” she asked, turning away from him. “And I could ask you the same thing: are you talking to me out of obligation, or do you really want to?”

“What do you think?” 

“I think you’ve got your own agenda, and you’re trying to see where I fit in.”

“Hmm, maybe. Interesting opinion.”

“And yes, I do want to change. It’s ironic, that you were the one who made me realize that. You were the catalyst for everything, really. I fell for you, and I felt I wasn’t good enough, and I slowly changed for the worse while trying to do better. Now I’m trying to reverse that, again, all because of you. But you’re all safe and sound now. You have Equinox, and I’d rather not ever feel those feelings again, so no need to worry about my filthy emotions tainting your lily white ass. You’re safe.” 

Nidus was taken aback. He hadn’t expected Saryn’s feelings to run so deep on the matter, and had been gearing up to tell her she was in the wrong. But now, he found he had no response to her, and wasn’t sure what to think.

“Is that all?” she asked, her tone growing frosty. 

“No.” he said, shooting a charger with his Hema. “There’s one more thing.”

She glared at him. “What?” She turned her back to him, throwing her spores on an unlucky runner, which burst, and promptly began to rot it while it spread them to its allies.

“Why do you want to change? Don’t say because of me, because it’s not that, at least, not just that. What is it, truly? What’s at the heart of it?”

“Why does that matter? Who cares? Certainly nobody here.Why should you be privy to something like that?”

“So you don’t know?”

“Just because I don’t want to answer you doesn’t mean I don’t know! I just don’t want  _ you  _ to know. I don’t want anyone to know. Not you, not Hildryn, not even Lotus.”

“I’m trying to help.”

“No, you’re not. You’re trying to decide whether I’m worth the effort. No, wait, not even that. You’re trying to decide whether I’m worthy of another chance. Maybe you’re even trying to decide whether I’m worthy to still be alive.”

“You’re not making yourself look all that good by refusing to answer.” he pointed out.

“You don’t deserve an answer. Look, if you’re going to be like this the whole time, you could at least do it as far away from me as possible.”

“Why don’t I deserve the answer, because I rejected you?”

“Because it’s very,  _ very  _ personal, and something I’m afraid to admit, even to myself!”

“Maybe admitting it to me would help.”

Saryn was silent for a moment. Finally, she replied.

“Just leave me alone. I have no idea why you’re trying to dig through my secrets, but I will tell you this. If you all don’t trust me, I lose all the more trust in all of you.”

“Fine, but you’ll come to regret not opening up to your peers. It’s going to make things just that much harder.” He turned and stalked off, leaving Saryn alone to deal with the group of enemies. Not that she couldn’t take them rather easily, but it was the gesture that spoke volumes to her. She caught up with him after the easy dispatch.

“You act like I’m not trying to open up. Well, you’re wrong. I’m trying, but every time I do, someone kicks me in the soft spot. Last time it was Ember. Today, it was you. I want to open up, but why do I have to open up to you? Why do you have the right, above everyone else, to know the most personal and private thing I have to tell? Is it the fact that I used to have feelings for you? Or maybe that you’re just here on this mission? Whatever your reason is, it’s not good enough.” She sighed. “I want to tell someone. It hurts to think about. It hurts to keep in my heart, but you’re not the person to tell. Even if we were closer. There’s nobody I can tell about this. Nobody who would understand. I wish things were different, but this is how they are, and this is the way they’ll most likely stay.”

Nidus stopped, unsure of what to say. On the one hand, he did want to know, but on the other, Saryn definitely had a right to her privacy, and if she didn’t want to share her reasons, she didn’t have to. 

“Well, I...I hope things get better for you, Saryn.”

“No you don’t, but thanks for the sentiment.” She turned, walking away. Nidus watched her, mentally kicking himself. He didn’t have to respond to things the way he had, but he did anyway. Now, he’d gone and messed it all up, and he’d never get another word in edgewise again. A part of him, a small one, but it was there, wanted to believe that she wanted to change, because he remembered how she used to be. If she had stayed that way, he might have felt the same way for her as she did for him. Eventually.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tyl put his hand on her shoulder, briefly. He felt her shiver, but she didn’t move away. She nodded at him, but didn’t respond otherwise.

“Er, if you don’t mind me asking...what is your reason for changing, and wanting to change?” Kuda asked.

“I would prefer not to answer.” Saryn whispered. Tyl glared at the Lich.

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-” she cut herself off.

Saryn sighed. “It’s okay, you’re only curious. Innocently curious.” 

Kuda looked at Tyl, silently wondering what they should do.

“Well, I’ve some experiments to get back to. Kuda, would you mind showing Saryn around? We don’t want her getting lost.” He looked questioningly at the Lich.

“Yes, sir.” She was happy that Tyl had agreed to let her in. 

Tyl nodded, before walking off towards his lab. Saryn glanced around.

“I will admit, I’ve always wondered what this place looks like inside.”

“Well, there’s plenty of time to show it off.” Kuda gestured down the hallway, and set off, Saryn following along beside her. Maybe things wouldn’t be so bad, after all.


	14. Kuva's Blessing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grineer friends are weird friends.

And so the Warframe’s presence became a regularity. Sort of.

Whether she was there or not wasn’t the issue, rather, it was more complicated than that. Her presence caused rumors to fly among the soldiers, rumors that didn’t necessarily reach the ears of Tyl Regor. And although Saryn was used to the staring and the whispers to a certain extent, she still avoided the majority of them, when she could. It wasn’t like she went out of her way to bother anyone, usually just finding an empty room she could use for a few hours before leaving.

At first, the soldiers tried to spy on her, to try to see what she might be up to. After a couple days, however, they completely lost interest. Saryn would never do much, just sitting and thinking most of the time, or staring out a window at the ocean. It wasn’t long before the soldiers spared her nothing more than a passing glance, which Saryn actually preferred. It was a mutual ‘don’t touch me and I won’t touch you’ kind of thing.

On this particular occasion, she was staring out one of the underwater windows. The ocean was a beautiful dark blue, and she was mildly entranced by the peacefulness of it, wishing her thoughts and feelings could be as tranquil. She sighed unknowingly, bringing her thoughts back to the present. She didn’t want to think about what could have been, not right now. 

She went to turn away from the window, but out of the corner of her eye, a shape slid past. It was massive, black scales glinting in the underwater light. She watched it in awe, and, admittedly, fear as well. She counted herself lucky that they were on opposite sides of the wall. She stayed still for a while, amazed at how easily it seemed to move, despite its size, it’s body forming elegant coils as it swam.

She heard the sound of marching, rousing her from her reverie. A squad came down the hallway, patrolling on their rounds, and barely gave them a passing glance before turning back to the serpentine creature. One of the soldiers walked up next to her, also looking at the creature. 

“We call them Leviathans, there’s a few around here,” said the Lancer. She whipped around, startled. He raised his hands. “Sorry, sorry, didn’t mean to frighten you.”

Skal had never had much time for the commander’s pet Warframe, but he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t come to feel a little pity for her. There was a reason she was coming here, instead of staying with her allies, and so, against his better judgement, he decided to reach out a hand, so to speak, and see how she’d respond.

“I just didn’t hear you come up, is all.” Saryn took a few deep breaths. 

“I’m sorry, I should have said something.” He gave a rueful laugh. “Anyway, there’s at least three of them that we know of, and this one isn’t even the biggest.”

“He’s very beautiful.” She said, hands and face pressed up against the glass like an excited child at an aquarium. “I didn’t know Uranus had things like this.”

“The Commander wants to come up with a way to study them, but hasn’t ever found a way to without killing them. He says that’s not an option, and I agree. Creatures like these shouldn’t be put down just because we don’t understand them.”

“He seems...more level headed than the other commanders. Maybe lure them up with food?”    
  


“Well, the problem isn’t luring them, it’s making sure they get captured. They’re massively strong, I’ve heard. The last time the Commander tried, it punched a hole in the wall so big, we had to weld the door shut to prevent the lab flooding.” Skal shrugged. “After that, he decided that maybe it’s better to leave them be.”

“That thing...punctured a  _ wall _ ?” Saryn was awestruck; most walls here had to be at least two feet thick, possibly more.

“Yep, up on the top, so we had the ocean leaking down to the lower levels for weeks before it got fixed. Not to mention all the mold and rust it caused, as well.”

She nodded, turning her attention back to the leviathan. Skal was acutely aware of some of his fellows staring, but he didn’t mind too much. This Warframe wasn’t what he expected, like a Kubrow on a short chain. She was...very polite, friendly almost. Maybe having her here wasn’t so bad.    
  


“I’d probably better go. Got patrols to do, you know how it is.” 

She nodded. “Don’t let me keep you. I, uh...it was nice meeting you,” she said, poking her index fingers together.

“You too. See you around,” he said, waving over his shoulder. She gave him a small wave back.

“Hey, someone made a new friend I see.” a voice said after they’d left. Saryn whipped around once more, this time to see Kuda standing across the hall. 

“I don’t need more of that!” Saryn huffed. “Were you standing there the whole time?” 

“Most of the time. I just didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Oh, how thoughtful of you.” 

Kuda laughed. “Alright, I’ll lay off. It was nice to see you fascinated by the leviathans. You just show so little emotion, I didn’t want to spoil the moment.”

“Am I really so blank?” she said, wilting a bit.

“You can be. It’s not a bad thing, really, but it just makes it more noticeable when you show emotions.”

“I guess I’ve just been so used to not talking to anyone at all, much less being emotional around others...it’s too easy for someone to pick up on that and use it against you.”

“Well, I hope you don’t have to worry about that here. Not from me, at any rate.” She put a hand on Saryn’s shoulder, making her flinch. Kuda pulled her hand away.

“Sorry. It’s just been a while.”

“I’ll do what I can to make things better for you here. Just let me know if I can help, alright?”

“Sure...actually…” she hesitated. 

“You can tell me, it’s alright,” Kuda said, soothingly.

“I just want someone to talk to, I guess.” 

“Tell you what. I was going to head down, get something to eat, and meet a friend of mine. You wanna come? We can talk on the way if you’d like.”

“That...could be nice.”

“Alright, let’s go, then.” Kuda led the way down the hall, Saryn walking along beside her. She hadn’t expected Kuda to say yes, and so was pleasantly surprised when she’d agreed. “So, what’s been bothering you? More nightmares?”

“No, I stopped sleeping, so no more dreams.”

“You told me Warframes don’t need sleep, but still. Seemed like it helped you cope, I’m sorry you had to take such drastic measures.”

“It’s not the only option I have, now, thanks to you and Regor. I just...I guess I wanted it to be better than it was. I do miss my sleep, but...I never want to dream again. It’s very tempting, though.”

“I talked to him about it, and he said it might be stress related.”

Saryn paused. “Well, I suppose that makes sense, given that…” She didn’t finish the thought. “Nevermind. I guess...I’ve been feeling unworthy of your kindness, if I’m being honest.”

“What? Of course you’re worthy of it, especially if I have any say in the matter.”

“Why? You hardly know me, yet you’re being this nice, even though I was awful to you when we met.”

“Yeah, well…” Kuda absentmindedly rubbed the back of her neck. “I suppose I’m trying to make up for that. You were only defending yourself, after all.”

“That’s not really a good excuse. I was just a jerk.”

“Well, so was I, considering that the Commander said you could stay. What I’m saying is that I feel bad about how I talked to you, back then.”

“If you think so.” she relented, staring at the floor as they walked.

“What do you do when you’re not here?” Kuda asked, curiosity getting the better of her.

Saryn shrugged. “Most of the time, I’m on missions, or,” she cleared her throat. “Getting told off by my, ehm, comrades. Sometimes, though, I’ll just wander the Plains, or Orb Vallis, especially the latter. I like the snow.”

“Do you have nobody you interact with? Are you just hiding from your own all the time?” 

“You know how it went down with Nidus, and...I never did tell you about my attempt to apologize to Kelpie, did I?”

Kuda shook her head, intrigued.

“Well, long story short, I was laughed at. Then, when I persisted, they got angry, and I had to leave before things turned...violent. Technically they already did, as Ember threw her Glaive prime at me, for the third time.”

“Did you retaliate? At all?”

“How could I? I’d be taken down faster than I could draw my swords.”

“No, not like that. I mean...defend yourself, talk to them, get angry, do  _ something _ . If it were me I would have hulked out on them.”

“I was surrounded by at least a dozen of them, there was nothing I could have done.” She shook her head. “Whatever I had done, I would have come off looking like the villain. I don’t want to look like that anymore.”

Kuda sighed. “Fair enough, I see where you’re coming from.”

She looked down again, embarrassed. “Also...I thought if I did nothing...maybe I’d get some sympathy.”

There was a small pause before Kuda answered. “Don’t expect sympathy from those you know are against you. It does nobody any favors, and only serves to bring you down.”

“That would have been useful to know earlier.” She heaved a sigh. “I mean, it’s not like I have nobody, but...all my ties there feel very flimsy.”

“I can’t say I blame you, but...things aren’t always what they seem.” The Lich took a deep breath. “Sometimes, it’s more beneficial to both parties to make up immediately. But, other times, it’s better to give the other space and time, to prevent things from getting worse.”

“It’s been quite a long time already, at least to me. Maybe not long enough.”

“As much as I hate to say it, that does seem to be the case. Sometimes, it takes years for things to get better.”

“Y-years?” Saryn was unable to hide the dismay in her voice.

“Well, you know the old saying, time heals all wounds and all that.”

“Really now?” she said, feeling like her blood was being drained, the world around her seeming to tilt and spin. Her legs wobbled.

Kuda, noticing her tone of voice, looked over at her to see her stumble, and caught her just in time to keep her from falling over. 

“What happened, are you okay?” she asked, worried. 

“I-I’m fine. Just a bit...out of balance.”

“Right...do you Warframes eat at all?”

“We don’t need it, but we can...it all kind of depends, and it all kind of gets absorbed by the Helminth, so it’s not like it gives any benefits. If anyone does, it’s just for the sake of it, and the taste. Umbra has a thing for noodles.”

“Who is that? One of the other frames?” 

She nodded.” Yep. He’s...quite a character.”

“What do you prefer, if I may ask?”

“I’ve never really taken advantage of it. Why?”

“I was thinking it might help, calm you down and all that, and it feels rude to get a meal without at least offering you something.”

“Oh, uh...I mean, is it okay for you to do that? I don’t want to create trouble.” 

“If the Commander is letting you in here, I don’t think this will be an issue.”

Saryn hesitated before she answered. “I...I would like that. Although...I have no idea what you guys actually eat here. I’ve heard Grineer food tends to include...other Grineer, but Regor doesn’t seem like the type to condone that.”

“Well, you’re right. Elsewhere, that is the case, as it’s a convenient food source, albeit extremely gross, but here, it’s derived from fish, squid, shellfish, oceany type things, and there’s some hydroponic-grown plant material as well. It’s quite good, actually.”

“Is it?”

“Well, I think so, especially compared to some of the other things I’ve had to eat.” Kuda shivered. “Believe me, you don’t want to know.”

“I’ll take your word for that, I suppose.” She paused. “Maybe you’re right, I do need something in my system.”

Kuda smiled. “Let’s go, then.”

Saryn had expected it to be loud in the mess hall, the clatter of silverware on trays, talking, the usual. While there was that, it didn’t break her ears, like walking through a relay did. She was pleasantly surprised, if still a bit wary. Kuda noticed, and patted her on the back.

“Not what you were expecting, I know. Another thing that the Commander does differently, and admittedly, he’s not the only one, but he does it best.”

“You seem to like him quite a bit. I’ve never really heard of a Grineer being so attached to their higher-ups.”   
  


“Well, Tyl Regor isn’t your run-of-the-mill executive. He actually cares about his staff, and his soldiers. He’s constantly asking his people about their day. He even goes so far as to listen to their ideas on improvements that could be made to the sealab. Honestly, there’s no other Grineer like him.”

“It’s definitely unusual for the bunch of potato heads. I mean, most of your leaders are either really creepy, or...Vay Hek.”

Kuda nodded. “Some, yeah. Kela’s actually not bad either, but her and the Commander are friends, so I’d assume it rubbed off on her. That, and raising a human child, but I digress. Sargus is also decent, but that comes more from his desire to redeem himself after the Flamethrower Incident.”

“...I have several questions.”

“Kela found a human girl somewhere and thought she was cute, so she took her in and made her an assassin, because I guess mama Grineer can’t raise a bitch. And yes, that was her only reason. As for Sargus...well, the official name for it was ‘The Inappropriate Conduct with a Flamethrower Incident’, but that’s too long.”

Saryn was quiet for a few moments before it finally hit her. “...By the Lotus. Did he really?”

“Yep, he did.” Kuda tried not to break down into gleeful giggles. 

“Right...so where’s your friend?” she said, desperate to change the subject.

“You’d think it would be easy to spot the only other Lich here, but Kuldain likes to sit in shadowy corners for some reason.”

“I can’t say that I blame him for not wanting to be noticed,” Saryn muttered. “It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”

“I can’t argue there.” Kuda took another look around, finally spotting him across the room. “There he is. A small part of me thinks that he does it just to toy with me.”

“Why, do you think he likes you or something?”

“What? Why would he? We just work together, and besides, we’re the only liches here. I guess it’s only natural that we would hang around each other. But I don’t think he likes me, not in that way, at least.” _Not that I would mind,_ she thought. 

The Lich looked up as Kuda walked over, followed by Saryn. “So, this is the Warframe I’ve heard so much about?” He was similar in looks to Kuda, in that he was actually quite easy on the eyes, his face pale but well sculpted, eyes bright and cheery but slightly shaded by a thatch of thick black hair.

“Kuldain, meet Saryn. Saryn, this is Kuldain, the only other Lich anywhere in the Sealab.” She gestured to him in a dramatically mocking way.

He reached across the table, Saryn shaking his hand shyly. “Pleasure to meet you, Saryn. You’ve become something of an enigma, seeing as how nobody has a clue as to why Regor took you in, so it’s nice to finally get a look at you.”

Saryn wasn’t used to being talked with on equal terms, especially with any kind of positive connotations, and wasn’t sure how to respond. “Well...I’m not sure why he did either, really.”

”In that case, you can either start guessing, or see if one of the Tubemen will spill.”

“Or, you could just do the obvious and ask him directly,” Kuda interjected. “He would probably tell you. At least, I think the chances of him saying are higher than one of the Tubemen.”

“Not sure he’d be pleased about that. Besides, you know how stubborn he can be.”

“Well, could I convince one of you two to tell me?” Saryn asked.

“Would if I knew.” Kuldain shrugged. “Not that I’m opposed to your presence here, especially since you don’t seem to want to break anything or kill anyone, unlike most of your friends. It just takes a bit of getting used to.”

“I wouldn’t call them friends, but yes, I’m not here for that.”

“Forgive my curiosity, then, but may I ask why you’ve come here? This isn’t exactly a natural attraction for most people.”

“I…” She paused, unsure of what to say. “I wanted to be as far away from my own faction as possible. I mean  _ everyone.  _ Lotus, Ordis, my operator, every single other frame, Alad, and whoever else.”

“Did something happen?”

“Yes. Several things happened. Things I’d rather not tell anyone for fear of shattering the tenuous tolerance you have for me.” she expected him to press the issue, but he simply nodded.

“Fair.”

“You know it makes you look like a dick asking personal questions from strangers.” Kuda said, flicking him in the forehead and setting down a steaming tin in front of Saryn.

“I know, I know, but I just get so curious.” He started tucking into his own food. 

“It’s fine Kuda, really. It’s to be expected.” Saryn sighed. 

“So, how are you liking the base?” he asked, changing the subject.

“I can comfortably say it’s easier to navigate than most Orokin halls.”

“Is that so? I’ve never been there, how is it different?”

“Less gold, less marble, fewer death traps, and overall easier on the eyes. Not to mention the complete absence of those death sphere things. It’s better.”

“I see she hasn’t found the acid pits yet.” he said, completely straight faced.

“There are acid pits here?” she asked, worried.

“He’s only joking, Saryn,” Kuda said, reaching across the table and punching Kuldain in the arm, who snickered. “Tyl would not abide pits of acid being part of the lab. Too much danger.”

“Especially for a certain Tubeman.” Kuldain muttered.

“Who’s that?” Saryn asked, curious.

“Danya, you’ve probably seen her clinging to Regor like a shadow. She had a...less than pleasant run in with one of your colleagues and got a bit twisted, shall we say.”

“She’s a sweetheart, even if Kuldain finds her to be annoying at times,” Kuda interjected.

“I know she’s not in the best of conditions, but it’s not always easy to bend over backwards for her, and sometimes she can just be infuriating. I like her, don’t get me wrong, and I feel for her, but she can get in the way sometimes.”

“She’s absolutely delightful, don’t let Kuldain’s opinion get you down. She’s fun to be around.” Kuda said, looking at Kuldain.

“You say that because you don’t have to interact with her as often.”

“I choose to go see her, of my own volition. I think that counts for something.”

He sighed. “You are impossible, Kuda Delgis.”

She smiled. “I sure am, Kuldain Corlokk.”

“What does Tyl think of her?” Saryn interjected, putting her spoon down.   
  
“He’s like a mother Condroc, he’s very protective of her. And I really don’t blame him, as I would probably be the same way,” Kuda said.

“Makes sense. I suppose I’ll meet her eventually, if I’m here enough.”

“Be careful around her. You don’t want Regor angry with you, believe me.” 

“Well, he already threatened to cut me in half once, so I can believe it.”

“Just warning you. No one gets away with being mean to Danya.” 

“I’ll be sure to keep that in mind.” she said, quieter than she’d meant to. She let the Liches get absorbed into their own conversation while she turned back to her food, slightly weirded out by the fact she was actually eating something. The last time she’d actually done it was probably long before she became a Warframe.

Kuda, noticing her discomfort, spoke up. “It’s okay, Saryn. I promise the food is fine. See, even Kuldain is eating it.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, huh?” he protested, lightly tugging her ponytail.

“It’s not that, it’s just...it’s quite strange to be eating again.” She looked down at her food, still unsure about it. Then, she mentally shrugged. What was the worst that could happen?

To her mild surprise, it was rather good. It was warm, a bit salty, and settled nicely in her stomach. Lo and behold, the Grineer had managed to produce something edible.

“So, how is it?” Kuda asked, curious.

“Well, the first bite didn’t make me want to hurl, so much more pleasant that I expected.”

“That’s good. You want more?”

After a moment, Saryn nodded. “I could go for more, sure.”

Somewhere down the line, Saryn realized that she had made some friends. It was a strange thing to think about, accustomed as she was to being alone. There was a strange formality about Hildryn that kept her from opening up fully, and she’d only just begun to build a bridge with Harrow. It was a new feeling for her, and looking forward, suddenly, the future didn’t look so bleak.


	15. Worthy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baby Tubemen and big Tube Science boy make friends with sad warframe

“Kuda, can I ask you something?” Saryn ran up next to the Lich, falling into step beside her.

“Of course, what is it?” 

“Well…” she trailed off, unsure of what exactly to say. “I’d like to get into Regor’s good graces. He’s...polite, but it feels kind of...cold, formal. I don’t know...I guess I’d like to get him to warm up to me, if that’s possible. I am in his territory after all.”

“I don’t know, really.” Kuda paused, considering. “The only thing I can recommend, is to bring him supplies he might need. That might give you an in to start talking to him.”

“...I should have thought of that. Any ideas of what he might need?”

“Hm. Well, tellurium for one, it seems he’s always in short supply. Anything rare that you Tenno like to snatch would be another, so-”   
  
“-Orokin cells, ayatan stars and the like?” 

“Yeah, things like that. I’m sure he’ll be happy for them.”

“Thank you.”

One problem with rare materials, as it turns out, is that they’re rare, and you may or may not have a limited amount at your disposal at any given time. This becomes a problem when one wants to both donate and retain some of said materials, and this was the problem Saryn found herself facing, and she had three options. One, give them to him anyway, which might have been the wisest choice. He’d see that even with limited resources she was willing to provide something to back up her verbal gratitude. Two, she could give him some of her more common but still (she assumed) useful materials like ferrite. Three, and by far the least profitable, would be to drag Hildryn off somewhere and hope they got lucky.

So obviously she went with door number three.

“Hildryn? I’m sorry to bother you. Are you busy?”

“I can listen.” She said, putting away her modding work on Larkspur for a bit. “What’s up?”

“I’ve found myself needing some, er, harder to acquire materials.” 

“What is it you need?”

“The usual candidates. Argons, Gallium, Orokin cells, Tellurium. The ass pains.”

“Okay, I can’t help out right now, but next week will work. Is that okay?”

“Uh...can I ask what you’re doing that’s going to take a week?”

“I’m sorry, but I’ve made some promises to go on some missions with some of the others, and I’m booked until then. It's the dry season on Cetus, which means Eidolon season for the rest of us, and everyone needs me.”

After a moment, Saryn answered, quietly. “That’s nice, I suppose.”

“I’m real sorry about it. Would it help if I gave you some of the things you're looking for?”

She perked up a bit. “That would be helpful, yeah.” 

Even with Hildryn’s additions, it was a long, hard week of grinding before she had anything she felt was presentable, but it had been worth it. She had gained quite the crate full of the rare, annoying items that most Warframes took off their helmets and pulled their hair out over having to farm. And so, she showed up to the sealab, proud as a mother kavat to show him what she’d found. 

“You’ve been gone a while.” Kuda said, happy to finally catch her. “Where’ve you been?”

“Grinding.” she replied simply, hefting the crate in front of her.

Looking at it, Kuda laughed. “I’ll bet that took some time. Are you fully sick of it yet?”

“I was sick of it by day two, but I’m pleased with the results. I filled this thing and still had enough left that I wouldn’t be completely drained. Except the Argons. Either he finds a use for them today, or they’re gone.”

“I’m sure he’ll have several uses for them, he always does. Should I let him know that you’re coming?”

“Lucky him. I…” She looked down at her feet. “Uh, could you come with me?”

Kuda blinked. “Of course. Is something the matter?”

Saryn paused. “No, but...I would just like to have you there, if that’s alright.”

“Don’t sweat it.” She clapped the frame on the shoulder. 

Saryn perked up a bit, and soon they arrived at the door to Tyl’s lab. Saryn paused outside.

“Something up?” Kuda asked, curious.

“I’m just nervous, is all. Your boss can be intimidating.”

Kuda nodded sagely. “Yeah, he can be, but it takes a lot to get him angry, so you’ll be fine.”

Saryn sighed heavily. “I hope you’re right.”

Kuda led her down through a maze of equipment she couldn’t even guess the uses for, and several pods of cloning tubes. Tyl was in the midst of all this, covered in tiny, kuva-jester sized Tubemen.These were new, very young ones, and they were climbing all over their Dagh, clinging onto foot and handhold of his armor with their sharp little claws, and squeaking incessantly, aside from one, who was content to sit on Tyl’s head and stare at everything. 

It was quite possibly the cutest thing Saryn had ever borne witness to. She wanted to say something out loud, but Kuda beat her to the punch. 

“Aww, they’re so cute!” Kuda squealed, practically skipping over and picking one of them up. He squeaked and wriggled around in her arms to look at her, staring and putting his tiny hands all over her nose and cheeks.

Saryn wanted to join in, but her nervousness wouldn’t let her. Instead, she simply set down the crate, and watched.

"Careful with him." Tyl warned the Lich.

“Of course, Commander. I just couldn’t resist.” Kuda reluctantly set the baby Tubeman down, and he skittered back to Tyl's side. “As much as I like them, they’re not the reason we’re here.”

“Oh?” Tyl turned to see Saryn standing behind her, awkwardly shuffling her feet.

"Uh…" she cleared her throat. "Kuda brought up that you were in need of some rarer resources, so I got some." She set the crate down.

Tyl paused for a moment. “Thank you,” he said, eventually, giving her a pat on the shoulder. “I’ve been needing some things.”

She brightened a bit, nodding. “I’m glad it will be useful, it was a pain in the ass farming for them.”

“Where did you get all this?” he said, digging through the crate.

“Some from the void, some from my own stash, and some I pillaged from Sargus Ruk.” she chanced a small, mischievous smile. 

Tyl laughed at that, grinning under his mask. “From Ruk himself? You’re more tenacious than I gave you credit for.”

“I would say I took it out from under his nose, but I’m not sure he has one.” 

“He might, he might not,” Tyl snickered. “Maybe he keeps it in his pocket.”

“Does he have those?” 

“Everyone has at least one, except for me, because if I did, one of these little thieves would snatch anything in it.” Tyl gestured to the veritable pile of small Tubemen, who proceeded to stare at him in unison and quieted their squeaking for a moment. 

Saryn nodded. One of them wandered over to Saryn, pausing at her feet and looking up at her. The others quickly noticed, and soon she had a small crowd gathered around her, small squeaks filling the air. 

“No sudden movements or they’ll swarm you.” Kuda said, sounding like she really wouldn’t mind seeing that happen.

Saryn was careful to stay as still as she could, simply returning their stares. Carefully, she took a slow step back, but she must have moved too quickly, as she suddenly had several of them climbing up her legs, squeaking excitedly at the discovery of this new thing, whatever she was. She stayed stock-still, nervous that any small movement would cause more to make their way to higher ground.

“I think they like you.” Kuda offered, trying not to laugh. 

“Or they really don’t, and they’re trying to scare me off.” 

“Nah, they’re too young to be that malicious. Right?” she looked over at Tyl.

“Well…”

“Please tell me you’re kidding.” Saryn was getting increasingly nervous. “I don’t want to get smothered by mini Tubemen.”

“Just joking with you.” he replied gently.

Saryn flinched as she felt small hands on her shoulder, and looked over to see one of the Tubemen climb up and put its arms around her neck, snuggling up to her. She sighed and patted its little head.

“Alright, you’re not  _ so  _ bad.” 

The small Tubeman let out a quiet squeak, refusing to let her go. Tyl said something to them in Grineer, and they swarmed back to him, except for the one clinging to her neck, who lingered for a while before jumping off. 

“They don’t normally have that sort of response to new people,” Tyl said. “Most of the time, they’re shy, and they have to warm up to you. They took an instant liking to you, though.”

“It’s probably because they saw you acting positively to me before. If you’re comfortable with me, I assume they would follow your lead.”

“Sometimes, yes. But that’s not the way things went with Kuda.” Tyl gave her a look.

“Yeah, they wouldn’t come near me for weeks, and I was visiting daily. They warmed up eventually, though.” 

“Maybe they don’t like the reek of kuva on you. I’ve done enough siphons to know that it’s not a pleasant thing.”

“I never noticed any stench. Is there really, or are you pulling my leg?” She gave Saryn a suspicious look.

“I’m not, I swear. Excalibur’s mentioned it too. That strange iron-copper smell that’s almost like blood, but not quite.” 

“Hm. I’ll have to look into that. Maybe the Commander can find a way to counteract that particular side effect,” she said, looking hopefully at Tyl.

“The kuva’s a part of you now, I’m not sure there’s much I can do about it.”

“It’s not that it’s really bad, per se, just noticeable.” Saryn added.

“Well, if it’s noticeable, I’d still like to be able to do something about it. Maybe some sort of neutralizer?”

“I wouldn’t think you’d have to. It’s just another Lich thing, along with your weapons and personal enemies.”

Kuda sighed. “Well, I suppose you’re right, Saryn. But still, it makes me feel...dirty, somehow.”

Saryn reached up and patted her on the shoulder lightly, then turned away like it never happened. Kuda was surprised by the action, and couldn’t muster an appropriate response. A show of friendship? From Saryn of all people, who kept her emotions under lock and key? Well, this was certainly new, but not unwelcome.

On Saryn’s part, she was embarrassed that she’d shown that much emotion, especially positively. No doubt this would have some sort of negative impact, she thought. She had meant well, but...she knew that Kuva Liches were proud, haughty, almost Grineer royalty, gifted as they were by the queens. As much as Kuda claimed that she liked her, it was like a princess being friends with a peasant girl. In short; don’t touch. 

But, Kuda didn’t seem to be responding that way, and it made the frame’s brain fry. In fact, she wasn’t responding at all. She had expected to get swatted away, possibly slapped. It wouldn’t be the first time, but nothing of the sort happened. The Lich stiffened but didn’t make any gesture toward her. Saryn made a mental note to never do that again.

She returned the favor on Saryn’s unadorned shoulder before moving to help Tyl round up his hyperactive progeny. The frame decided she wouldn’t be much help with that, and made her exit, climbing back up to the surface level to watch the sky. She stooped, leading over the railing and enjoying the seabreeze on her bare face, smelling clean and mildly salty. 

After some time, she heard the door open behind her, and the distinct needle-like clicks of a certain set of prosthetic legs, and turned around to see Tyl standing there. “What brings you out here, Regor?”

“Getting some peace after the wrangling. You?” 

“Just enjoying the smell of the ocean on the wind, among other things.” She took a deep breath, savoring the scent. “It makes me want to come back more and more. It’s nice here, surprisingly peaceful. I expected things to be messier.”

“What do you take me for, Vay Hek?” She snorted, and Tyl felt himself smiling a bit under his mask.

“As if. You’re much more tolerable than him. If there’s one thing I’d like to congratulate Kelpie for, it’s taking the leg off that overgrown chicken.”

“That is the general consensus among us. We tolerate him, but let’s just say he doesn’t hold as much water as the rest of us. She really did help drive another nail into that particular coffin, although I doubt he’ll ever be fully relinquished.”

“Still, she did what she had to do.” Saryn replied softly, turning her head down to stare at the placidly lapping waves.

Tyl nodded. “That she did, and although he is Grineer, I would like to thank her for taking that bite out of him.”

She nodded in agreement, and they lapsed into a silence for a while, him leaning slightly over the railing next to her, hands loosely wrapped around it.

"May I ask you something, Saryn?" he turned to her, head tilted slightly to one side.

"E-eh? Of course, shoot."

"Have you tried talking to Kelpie since the whole...incident?"

At this, she froze, mentally kicking herself. She had conveniently managed to forget that he was friends with her. Of  _ course  _ he'd ask about Kelpie. From the recording Baruuk showed her, he liked her quite a bit.  _ Stupid, stupid.  _ How had she been so dumb as to overlook that? Maybe all his kindness to her had been nothing but a ploy to lure her into some kind of justice. She sighed. Maybe that was for the best.

"I tried...once. I wanted to try and patch things up, and it didn't go very well. I haven't attempted since. I can take a hint."

“You do regret what you’ve done to her, then?”

“I have never felt regret so strongly as I do now.” she gave him a hollow, dead look. “I don’t really know what happened to me, why I became that way. Thinking about it has kept me up, but I just can’t conjure up the root of the problem. Maybe it was always just there waiting for me to finally give up my morals.”

Tyl thought for a moment. “If you looked back, could you see a decision you made that would have been the start of it all?”

“Possibly my fixation on Nidus. That was...not a wise decision, but then, all of my choices after that were spiraling downward. There’s nobody I can pin the blame on for my current situation other than myself. It won’t do me any good to be looking for someone else to shirk the responsibility on, and it won’t help me get better.” 

He nodded. “Good. At least you recognize that.”

“Not that it means much. Thank you regardless.”

“It means more than you’d think. How many people go their whole lives without knowing or caring about how awful they ended up? Blaming everyone and everything but themselves. I’ve known people like that. I used to be a little bit like that, a very long time ago. You’re quite rare, actually. Both self aware of your issues and actively trying to fix it. Many wouldn’t bother to put in the effort. More wouldn’t even bother trying. There is one thing you’ve never made clear though. Why Kelpie?”

“Kelpie…” She swallowed, trying to get the lump out of her throat. “She...she reminded me of myself. My old self. My  _ good  _ self. Back in the day when people actually liked me, when I wasn’t this jumbled wreck of ugly personality traits fighting each other like a bunch of kavats tied in a sack. I hated seeing her like that, like me, and I wanted her on my level, and it soon developed into me thinking she wasn’t a real Warframe at all. Just a copy, a mockery, with no right to even exist, and I...I wanted to ruin her. I really believed she was some cosmic mistake, instead of a living thing. I was...still am...jealous of her innocence, everything that she is that’s better than what I managed to be. A constant reminder that I am not really worthy of being forgiven by anyone, no matter what I do. It’s funny that I thought Kelpie was the imitation. With the way I acted, it might as well have been me.”

Tyl was silent for a long while, his hands clasped behind his back. Eventually, just as Saryn was starting to get nervous, he responded. “I wish I could tell you that it gets better, or that things will be different in some way, in the future. But, that’s not how it is, when it comes down to it. I will always look back with regret, no matter what. But, that’s not what I try to be focused on. It’s not a good idea to view the past as though it were the present, and worry about what we did. Regrets are a part of us, and anyone who says they have none is lying.” 

“Makes me wonder what you have to regret. You have the kind of success most only dream of.” she pushed a stray lock behind her ear.

He had expected this question. Part of him dreaded it, being made to think about it, and wanted to refuse. She had no business knowing. His greatest failure, the catalyst for why he was the way he was now, disregarding age and wisdom, something that haunted him even now, and practically influenced every calculated finger twitch. The other part of him, however, was almost desperate to tell her this, this monstrous secret of his. To just lay it bare and get it off his soul. The longer a secret is held, the more difficult it becomes to say, to even put into words, and this was a shortcoming he’d clung to for years, something that hid behind many of his actions and decisions.

_ Fenrir… _

“I have more to regret than you’d think.” He went silent for a moment. “I wasn’t always like this. I had my younger, dumber years, where I was hotheaded and foolish. That was the pride that came before my fall, and that’s what taught me my biggest lesson. Much as I wouldn’t mind touting myself as some benevolent figure for the sake of it, at least in the beginning, that wasn’t the reason I changed the way I ran this planet.”

“I assume you’d rather not tell me.”

“I would like to tell you, actually. I will, but not now. Too much information all at once, and especially more than I’m comfortable sharing at the moment. But I’ll tell you. Someday.”

“Whenever you’re ready.” she said, finally looking him in the eye, even with hers flitting around now and again. “Whatever it was, it can’t be worse than what I’ve done. You could still be forgiven. You’ll always be better than me.”

Tyl reached out and put his hand on her shoulder. “It’s time you stopped comparing yourself to others, as there’s nothing to be gained by doing so. I would put it as equal or worse than what you did, not that it matters. The crime and outcome were different, but not easy to come back from. I still haven’t.” He added quietly, and shook his head. “Don’t consign yourself to the gutter just yet.”

Saryn didn’t answer for a long time, simply wrapping her arms around her torso, content to let the conversation lapse into a comfortable silence. 

“Thank you.”

Tyl roused himself from his reverie. “You’re very welcome, Saryn.”


	16. Questions Without Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelpie fights an interesting foe, and the most important question remains with a buried answer.

Alad, being the concerned father he was, never expected that hearing about Kelpie coming back from a mission covered in blood was a good thing. And yet, here she was, humming as she washed the blood off with her colleagues congratulating her, leaving Alad dumbfounded as to what might have happened. He realized that this was one of the first times seeing her happy since…

He shook his head, pushing the thought away. Instead, he resolved not to mention the incident, to hopefully prevent spoiling the moment. 

Staying out of the way, he saw Umbra walk up to her and give her a massive sledgehammer, and wondered what was going on. 

“Did I leave this behind?” she asked him, hefting the massive, brutal looking weapon.

“Well, the celebrations after you took him down probably distracted you.” Umbra said, patting her on the back.

Alad couldn’t hold himself back anymore. “What are you talking about? What happened, why were you celebrating?”

“I fought the Wolf!” Kelpie said proudly, holding the sledge up for him to see.

“ _ What _ ?” 

“I fought the Wolf of Saturn Six and I kicked his ass.” 

“She did very well, too. Held her own, and then some.” Umbra spoke up.

“You killed the damn Wolf?” Alad said, still not quite believing it.

“Well...not exactly. He got away before we were able to take him down, but he was a mess. I’d be surprised if he lived. Those teeth of Kelpie’s are truly something to be feared.”

Alad nodded carefully. “That they are. But that begs another question: Do I need to worry about the Wolf of Saturn Six coming after Kelpie?”

Umbra shook his head. “Aside from Kelpie taking him out, she has his weapon. He’s left with nothing to come after her with, even if he wasn’t beaten within an inch of his life.”

“Well, then.” Alad took a deep breath, looking over at Kelpie. “You’ve done well, and made me proud of you to boot.” He wrapped his arms around her tightly, stroking the webbed crest on the back of her neck. Kelpie happily returned the embrace, squealing delightedly.

After Alad let go, Umbra stepped forward and hugged her as well, blowing them both away in surprise. 

“Umbra, did Wolf catch you on the head with his sledge?” Kelpie asked. 

“Maybe, but I’m just happy and proud of you, as well.” He playfully patted her on the head, before looking up to see Garuda waving at him. “Looks like someone’s been waiting for me. I’ll see you later,” he said, waving over his shoulder at them.

“Well, that was unexpected. Not unwelcome though.” she said finally, watching him leave arm in arm with Garuda. 

After a moment, Alad agreed. “I’ve never seen him hug anyone, aside from Garuda.”

“Not even that. He seemed...actually happy with me. You sure he’s not sick?”

“I wouldn’t throw out the option, yet. Maybe I’ll call him in for a check-over, make sure he’s all there.” He tapped a finger against his chin. “Then again, maybe he’s actually warming up, instead of being an unemotional rock of a person.”

“It’s nice to see that change, then.” She sat quietly for a moment, deep in thought. “So, what’s the deal with this Wolf of Saturn Six? What even is Saturn Six?”

Alad let out a short laugh. “Well, first of all, Saturn Six is a Grineer maximum-security penitentiary, where the Wolf was held prisoner. Rumor has it that at first, he followed the rules, was a model prisoner, and all that. Eventually, though, he broke out alongside some other prisoners, who banded together to form a ‘pack’, with him leading it, which is also where he got the name. Word is, they took down the Warden, and are now out there somewhere.”

“What made him snap?” she asked, starting to sympathize with this Wolf, just a little bit. “People don’t just go crazy like that. Maybe it was the confinement? I know I’d go nuts if I was ever stuck in a prison.”

“Well, in my humble opinion, you’d have to be crazy first to even end up getting sent there. Not just anybody gets in. As for what made him break? Well, everyone seems to think they have the answer, as rumors and hearsay fly in abundance. However, I trust that the answer I have is the honest one, for various reasons.” He took a moment to clear his throat. “The Warden of the prison was selling off inmates to the Corpus for use in experimentation.”

“That’s…” Kelpie shook her head. “I guess even Grineer loyalty can be flimsy.”

Alad sighed. “Everyone has a price, Kelpie. It’s not always money, or fame, or power. But everyone has their breaking point, and there’s always someone looking to benefit from that. I know that better than most,” he said, giving her a strange look.

“That’s true. I have one last question about Wolfie though.” she said, returning his look with her head slightly cocked to one side.

“Sure, what is it?”

“What did he actually do to land him in Saturn Six? I mean...maximum security, he must have done something outrageously evil, at least by Grineer standards, to land him there. Right?”

“That is where things become complicated. I don’t actually know. Nobody does. There are plenty of rumors, speculation, and even conspiracy theories, but nobody knows for sure. There isn’t one scrape of solid evidence, not even a whisper, almost like it’s been covered up.”

Kelpie thought for a moment, then shook her head. “I guess we might never know, then.” She wrapped her fingers around the sledge’s handle. It felt good in her hands, like nothing she’d ever felt before. While it wouldn’t be replacing Nuckelavee outright, she would definitely be taking it out for a while.

“I wonder if any Grineer know what Wolf did.”

“Well, if anyone knows, they haven’t spilled. I suppose there’s only one way to find out.”

“Can I go ask Tyl? Please?” she begged, with the air of a little kid asking their parent if they could go out to play with their friends. 

“Is this because you want to ask Tyl, or do you want to see Dakik in person instead of sending him love notes?”

“You...you know about that?” she asked, blushing under her helmet. “...I left my coms open, didn’t I?”

“It’s kind of hard to ignore it when you see your daughter getting messages with... _ certain _ titles on them.”

“I never sent him anything dirty! Come on Dad, you know me better than that.”

“I do, yes. All I saw was the title and who it came from. He has quite the way with words, doesn’t he?”

She nodded quickly and turned her head away. “H-he does.”

Alad smiled knowingly at her. “Well, go on then. You’ve earned it. Although, it might be better for you to not go there right away. You remember what happened last time when you got caught with Tyl. Call first, see if you can get what you want without making the trip.”

Hearing this, Kelpie deflated slightly. “Yes, Dad, you’re probably right.”

He patted her on the head. “You’ll get to see your boyfriend again soon.”

“He’s not-how do you manage to make me so flustered over something so mundane?”

“I’m your dad, that’s how. And don’t try to tell me he’s not your boyfriend, I saw enough for that.”

“...Don’t you dare tell anyone else.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it. Honestly, it’s quite sweet, and I wish you well with him, as long as he does well by you. If not...” He patted Ragnarok.

“Dad, he’s been a perfect gentleman, I’m sure it’ll be fine. Please don’t shoot him.”

“Don’t worry your pretty little head about it, just go make your call. And don’t forget to close your coms!” 

“Don’t worry about that anymore. You’ve shamed me enough, I’ll have to triple check now.” she said as she walked off, the embarrassment from Alad’s fatherly teasing buried under an avalanche of happiness of the lovey-dovey variety. Any contact with Dakik was good, even if it wasn’t in person.

She waited with her fingers actually crossed, hoping he’d pick up. Then, after what seemed like forever…

“Hey, Kelpie. I’ve missed you.” came the sugary sweet, gentle voiceover the line. She nearly jumped out of her seat.

“Dakik!” She composed herself, at a loss of words for a moment. “How long has it been?”

“A couple of weeks, I think. At least, talking like this. I assume you got all my messages?”

“I did, even the voicemail, don’t worry. I missed you too, a lot, so it was nice to hear from you.” She said, neglecting to tell him about the points where she had been checking nearly every five minutes. “Sounds like you were busy. What happened?”

“Well, we had a series of pump failures, so we had some flooding. Everyone available was on bailing duty. Not a fun time, let me tell you. After that, Dagh finally pulled the new Tubemen out for the first time. I almost preferred bailing to chasing them around trying to catch them, slippery little things.”

“Hold on, baby Tubemen? And I missed them? Did you have time to take a picture?” 

“I should have, darn it. I’ll get it to you next time, I promise.”

“I’ll look forward to it.” She cleared her throat. “Listen, um, I have a question. I’m curious about the Wolf of Saturn Six, and my dad doesn’t have the answers I’d like. Would yours?”

“The Wolf? Why?” Dakik asked, trying to not sound suspicious. The Wolf was especially infamous among the residents of Uranus, thanks to the rumor that their boss had some kind of connection to him.

“I may or may not have whooped his sorry butt.” Kelpie said proudly, holding up the sledgehammer for him to see.

“Wait, is that what I think it is?” He couldn’t contain the awe in his voice.

“Yep! His mighty hammer, and it’s all mine! You got one like it?” if she had visible eyebrows, she would have been wiggling them.

Dakik burst out in laughter, almost falling backwards. After some time, he gained control of himself. “No, I can’t say that I do.”

“Ah well, I still hope to see it one day.”

“One day, possibly.” He looked away briefly. “So, what did you want to know about the Wolf?”

“What did he do to land him in Saturn Six?”

Dakik went silent, and Kelpie began to fear that she’d offended him somehow. Finally, he answered.

“Well, that’s the big question, isn’t it? If I knew, I’d tell you, but the only one I know of that might know is Dagh. I actually tried asking him once, but he changed the subject pretty quickly. I don’t know if you’d have much better luck but...it would give you an excuse to come out here.”

“Well, you know that I’d love to come see you, and I’d like to get some answers, too. I’ll see if my dad would be okay with it, and if so, I’ll come.”

“I can’t wait to see you again! But...maybe give it a week or two, just so we can all get a chance to adjust to dealing with the baby Tubemen, alright?”

“...Fine.” She pouted. “But you’ll talk to me more, right?”

“I promise I’ll do what I can. At the very least, I’ll message you daily.”

“Alright.” She reached forward to hug her screen, since she couldn’t hug him. “I love you Dakik.”

He returned the embrace. “I love you, too. Two weeks isn’t that long, really. I’ll see you soon.”

The call was ended, and Kelpie was left alone, feeling like she was glowing from happiness.


	17. Prodigal Son

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The prodigal son comes home

The Grineer who called himself Wolf was limping down the hallway, his wounds dripping, leaving a trail of blood. He clutched his side, wincing as pain tore through him, but he couldn’t stop. He couldn’t be seen, not yet. He willed himself onward, his footfalls heavy on the metal floor. 

Damn, he should have been more careful. Warframes, always dangerous prey, and this one...well he’d never heard of one having jaws like that. She tore through his armor like it was thin air, crushing his bones and mashing his flesh and muscle, her maw flailing open and closed, pulling and rending, like she was trying to eat him. Who knows, maybe she was. Her teeth had been like daggers, and a mouth like that couldn’t be just for combative purposes. She’d stolen his sledge and left him there, left him to crawl away like a maggot to the one place he knew he might have a shot at getting help from.

The Titania Sealab.

So now here he was, back in the lab that birthed him, the man who’d made him what he was now. It was the last thing he’d ever want, to come back. 

Yet here he was.

The lab hadn’t changed since he’d left, and he knew the layout like it was imprinted in his mind. It wasn’t long before he arrived at a certain door, and his breath hitched in his throat. He shook his head, not giving the emotions time to form. Instead, he squared his shoulders as much as his injuries would allow, and walked through the door. 

Tyl’s back was turned, absorbed as he was in whatever he was currently up to. The light was dim, and the cooler, salty air was biting into his wounds, making them itch and sting. He forced himself out of his hunched stance, despite how his body screamed and howled at him in protest. He spoke a single word.

“Father.”

Tyl stiffened as if he’d been shot, his blood turning to ice. 

"Fenrir?" He turned around slowly, knowing what he'd see, yet still not quite believing it. "How?" he finally managed to spit out, his throat feeling drier than Mars's sandy, arid surface.

Fenrir winced again, pain worming its way through him. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t need help. Don't think this is some fuckin' family call. Can’t the questions wait?”

If Tyl was anymore divided, it would be in a physical sense. “And I’m just not supposed to question the fact that you come back here, not out of any sort of familial connection, but because you think that you’re entitled to help? You think you can just waltz in here and make demands after everything?”

“What do you want me to say? ‘I’m sorry?’ No, you’re not going to hear that.” Fenrir crossed his arms. “You don’t deserve that.”

“I wasn’t asking for that, Fenrir.” Tyl replied coolly, sounding calmer than he actually felt. “I was asking what you thought gave you the right to make me clean up the mess  _ you  _ got yourself into. Especially after you said you were done with me.”

“That’s rich, coming from you. How about what  _ you _ did to  _ me _ , hm? How about that? Yeah, I said that, and trust me, I’d rather not be here right now, but do you really want to open that book, or can we just move on to the part where I don’t die?” he spat blood onto the ground.

Tyl was silent for a long moment, studying Fenrir’s injuries. In truth, he wasn’t sure about helping him, and didn’t want to put those close to him in that kind of danger. On the other hand, however, there would always be a connection between them, whether they liked it, or not, and a part of him longed to repair the damage between them, as impossible a task it might have seemed. Finally, after what seemed like ages, he answered with a heavy sigh.

“I will help you. But, make no mistake, this does not mean you are welcome to wander my lab, or that I will be assisting you in anything other than healing. Moreover, if you don’t do what I tell you, when I tell you to do it, it could cost you your life. This lab has changed since you were here, and you have no idea how dangerous it can be.” He crossed his arms, looking at him. 

“Whatever you say,  _ Dagh _ .” 

Tyl stiffened slightly, wondering if he’d made a mistake. Eventually, he turned, becconning Fenrir to follow. 

Getting Fenrir out of his armor had been the easy part. 

Underneath, the true extent of the mess he was in became painfully clear. His whole left side, from lower ribs to pelvis was just mangled flesh, limp muscles and tendons, barely held together by a couple of crude, but effective, tourniquets placed around his torso, and slightly making it difficult for him to breathe in and out, and slowly dripping veins with their connections severed. He would’ve bled to death hadn’t it been for these bloody things. The meat was peeled off the crook of his neck and both shoulders, slivers of collar bone showing through, his throat bearing marks that looked suspiciously like they were made by teeth. Big, sharp teeth made for brutality. His right hand was little more than a bloody, pulpy mass with splintered bones sticking out, and it would probably have to be augmented entirely. Add to that the innumerable bruises, and several long gashes made by either claws or a rather jagged blade, and Tyl was starting to see why Fenrir had seen coming home as the best option. It looked like something had used him as a chew toy, and some of the bite marks looked a tad familiar.

“Ok, time to spit out your big secret, what happened?”

“I ran into a group of Warframes, is what happened. Not that it’s any of your business,” he snapped.

“Warframes don’t bite. Or, most don’t.” 

There was a brief silence as Tyl got to work, his hands moving over the massive wound in his side, removing the crude field bandages, before beginning the job of reconnecting the severed blood vessels, while replacing the ones that couldn’t be saved with tubes that were sewn in. After some time, Fenrir replied. 

“Well this one did. Her teeth were as long as my finger and cut through my armor like paper.”

Tyl’s suspicions had been confirmed. “Kelpie.”

“Is that her name? Little bitch. Never has someone come as close to killing me as she has. Who the fuck thought it was a good idea to give her teeth like that?”

“The same idiot who thought Zanuka was a good name.” Tyl muttered. “She could get away with not carrying a weapon, if she wanted.”

“You say that like you know her.” he glared at him accusingly, red eyes positively smouldering.

“...You could say that.” Tyl said hesitantly.

“Damn you, you’re friends aren’t you?” he grunted, bearing his bloody, crooked, almost fang-like teeth.

“We’re not friends, really. But I know her rather well, yes.” Tyl smiled a bit under his mask. “She mangled one of my hands, quite a while back.”

“At least your hands can be fixed.” 

Tyl went quiet again as he focused on his work. All of the damaged flesh would have to come out, and get replaced by new and healthy tissue, which he always made sure to have in a cloning vat somewhere. It was rather shocking the amount of times he’d actually needed it. After what seemed like forever, the process was done, and he could begin work on stitching him back together. This also took ages, and it was a while before Tyl spoke again. 

“That’s true, but her teeth just tore my hand apart. Her jaw is possibly the most powerful one in the system. Not something you want to be on the receiving end of, which begs the question, what the  _ hell  _ were you doing poking Warframes?” he asked, looking at him curiously.

“I wasn’t  _ doing _ anything, I was only maintaining my territory. Then they came in, started making a mess of it, and I stepped in. Didn’t work, though.” He coughed up more blood, wiping his mouth clean on the back of his intact hand. “Why do you want to know?”

“Just curious, I suppose.” Tyl worked in silence for a moment. “I just can’t help but wonder how things could have been, is all.” His voice was barely above a whisper.

“Quit dancing around it, I know you’ve got something to say, so spit it out.” 

Tyl stopped, taking a deep breath. “Fine. I’m not looking for forgiveness, or redemption. I just want to say that...I treated you extremely poorly, and I regret that. I blame myself for what happened. I was inexperienced and stupid, but that’s not much of an excuse.”

“Not much of an excuse? I was like shit on the bottom of your foot, on a good day. A failed experiment. I think I can hardly be blamed for eventually trying to kill you.” Fenrir snarled. “And yes, I would take prison all over again. It was worth it.”

Tyl nodded slowly, looking away. “No, I can’t really blame you for that.”

“No argument?” 

Tyl simply shook his head. “In a way, you were right to do it. I’m not who I used to be anymore, because of it. It, in a very roundabout way, helped me.”

Fenrir’s eyes narrowed. “I find that hard to believe.”

He shrugged. “Well, that’s the truth. Maybe I can prove it to you someday, maybe I can’t.”

“I don’t remember you being the optimistic type.”

Tyl gave him a look. “And I don’t remember you being the type to get taken down by a single frame. But times change, as do people.”

“It was one bullshittingly powerful Warframe! Give me a break.” 

“And yet, you broke out of the system’s most secure prison, and got revenge on the warden. So what changed?”

“Warframes started growing mouths.” He gave Tyl a nasty look. 

“Kelpie is the only one who has a maw like that, although that’s far from the only thing that makes a frame dangerous.”

Fenrir grunted. “I know, I know, you don’t have to lecture me.”

“Then don’t act so shocked that one managed to take you down. They have been sticking their feet up the System’s collective ass for so long, I was barely out of my tube and the Grineer were already sick of them.”

“Old news coming from an old man,” He said dismissively. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Nobody likes to admit they got their ass handed to them.” Tyl smirked under his mask.

“Look, I’m not here so that you can constantly try to rile me up. I’m only here to get healed, then I’ll be gone, and you’ll never have to tolerate me again.” He gave Tyl a defiant look.   
  


Tyl was silent for a long time, hands hanging by his sides. Finally, he spoke. “Maybe that’s exactly the opposite of what I want. Maybe I would like a chance to make it all up to you.”

“Oh, is it now? It’s a nice sentiment, but I can’t say I feel the same way.”

After a moment, Tyl nodded slowly, careful to keep his emotions in check. Without another word, he got to work replacing the lower part of Fenrir’s spine with a titanium alloy replica, molded to help hold the flesh around in place, while protecting his nervous column. After that was done, he attached a brace to it, completely restricting any sort of bending or twisting motion. Only after he was done did he speak, his voice flat, and devoid of any and all feeling. 

“You’ll stay on this slab for a couple of days, as you won’t be able to walk for at least that long. If you can avoid tearing any of your stitches out, you can leave.” he said, in a tone that clearly implied that’s something he wouldn’t be able to do, as he took measurements on his intact left hand, once again left one part impressed, one part wary of Kelpie’s maw. 

Surprisingly, Fenrir didn’t say a word. He seemed content to let the conversation lapse into an uncomfortable silence while Tyl did his work, watching him with his face blank as sheet metal.

At least until Tyl pulled out the bone saw. 

“What are you doing?!”

“That hand’s not going to amputate itself.” Tyl gave him a dark look. 

“It doesn’t need it! You can just rebuild it, like you did my side!” Fenrir began to pull at his bonds. 

“They are completely different body parts. You’ll be fine, I’ll make you a new one. You really don’t have a choice in the matter, because it’s either this or that hand gets extremely infected, and possibly kills you.”

Fenrir swallowed. “Don’t you at least have painkillers?”

“Yes, I do. I forgot about it, actually.” He reached behind him, picking up a syringe, and Fenrir couldn’t tell if he had been serious or not. “Before I do this, I should warn you: these aren’t safe. They will numb the pain, but are also highly addictive, so I can’t give you too much. Still want it?”

“...How addictive is it, exactly?” he cocked his head. 

“Enough that I can’t give you enough to completely take away the pain, just dull it significantly. It’ll be better than nothing, since this might make what Kelpie did look like a splinter in comparison, but I wanted to give you the choice.”

Fenrir squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. “...Fine, do it, as much as you’d probably enjoy hearing me scream like a baby, I’d rather not give you that.”

“I can assure you that’s not something I’d like to hear.” Tyl pushed the needle into his arm, emptying the contents of the syringe. Almost immediately his sense of touch started to dull, and a large portion of his pain just dropped away, and the feeling of temperature and general surfaces was almost nil.

“Is that enough?” Tyl asked. 

Slowly, Fenrir nodded. Then, his eyes widened as Tyl picked up the bone saw again, but before he could say anything, it was cutting into his arm. The sound was possibly worse than listening to Kelpie crunch his bones, a wet, fleshy tearing noise that made his skin crawl. As for pain, while Tyl had been honest about it being almost completely absent, it still slightly felt like he was being stabbed with tiny, sharp needles.

Eventually, though, the deed was done, and Tyl quickly bandaged the bloody stump. “Alright, that about does it. It’ll take a day or so to make the cybernetic, depending on how busy I am. For now, don’t move, or everything I’ve done will fall apart.”

“The fuck do you expect me to do, go for a walk?”

“I expect you to stay put, but I thought that I’d tell you to, just in case.” Tyl turned to leave, when he had a thought, and stopped. “Anything you need before I go?”

“What, you think I’m still your child? Just go.” 

Tyl started to say something, but decided against it, simply nodding and making his exit.

_ You’ll always be my Tubeman, even if you hate me. _

A few minutes after he’d left, Fenrir felt himself regretting that he didn’t ask for water.

Dumbass.

It might have been midnight, or it might have been sunrise, Fenrir couldn’t tell. He’d been drifting in and out of an unsatisfying sleep for hours, trying to stamp his emotions and more unpleasant thoughts down, his wounds starting to itch like mad, and his throat dry and parched. He shifted again, dreading how stiff he’d be in the morning. He turned his head to the side, trying to stretch his neck out...

...And let out a scream so unmasculine that even Nef Anyo, the system’s reigning champion of girly shrieks, would cringe at.

Sitting next to him was what he assumed to be a female Tubeman, a soft, dusty rose pink bow on the left side of her helmet, staring at him with wide turquoise eyes.

“...What do you want?” he asked pensively, voice raspy.   
  
“Are you Fenrir?” she asked innocently. 

“Who else would I be?”

“Just making sure. You  _ are  _ the very big brother Dagh said came back today.” she said excitedly, hugging him around the neck.

“Yes, yes, now who the hell are you?” 

“I’m Danya.” she answered cheerfully, still hugging him.

“Danya, when are you going to let me go?” Fenrir asked, trying to pull away.

“Oh, sorry.” She let go. “I am not good with personal space sometimes. Your lips are very chapped.” She stilled for a moment, thinking. “I’ll be right back!” Danya leapt up and darted off into the dark of the lab.

After a moment, she was back, a clean, wet rag cupped in her hands. “Here, you can suck the water out of it.” she folded it into a little square and placed it on his lips. The water was actually cold, and didn’t taste like blood, mold, or dusty and tepid. 

“...Thank you.” he said, grudging but sincere. Danya beamed at him.

“You want more?”

He nodded, and Danya ran off again, returning rather quickly, this time with a bucket as well as the rag, re-soaking it every time it was dry, talking to him while she did so.

“You must have gotten hurt really bad for Dagh to be this worried. He’s been pacing and muttering to himself for hours, and when he talked his voice was very quiet.”

"So the old man actually cares, does he?" Fenrir said thoughtfully, head turned to watch Danya saturate the rag again.

“Yeah...as far as I know he didn’t even go to sleep yet, and it’s really late. He was working on something, I guess your hand when I snuck in to check on him.” 

“How late is it?” he asked. 

“Uh...in Earth time it’s two or three. Late enough that I should be asleep, but I wanted to talk to you.” 

Fenrir sighed. “Why’s that, I wonder?” he mused quietly. 

“I was curious, and I wanted to meet my brother. We’re very alike, you know?”

“If we are, I don’t see how. Especially in the fact that I’m basically tied down to a metal slab.”

“You were torn up by a Warframe, right?” She gave him a conspiratorial look. “Well so was I!” she jabbed her thumb into her breast.

He was surprised, and gave her a look of newfound respect. “You don’t look it. Honestly, I wouldn’t have guessed.”

“That’s cause Dagh fixed me up super well. He had a fight with a Warframe. First he was just kicking and shaking my tube...and then…” She fell silent for a long moment, and he thought she might have forgotten what she was going to say. “He broke it. I don’t remember very much from that, except it was really cold all of a sudden, and I hurt everywhere and didn’t know why. It was scary, and everyone assumed I was gonna die. I probably would have if not for Dagh. I have a fake leg now, cause one was shorter than the other, and a brace cause my spine was all bent and I was too young and weak to get a plate put in.” she turned around to show him.

He was silent for a moment as he took in the extent of her mods, surprised that she was alive after all of that. He was surprised that  _ he _ was still around, which was probably thanks to Tyl. “I’ll be surprised if I can even come close to the way I was before Kelpie took a chunk out of me.”

“It is strange, since Kelpie’s actually really nice, but you should be fine. It’s flesh wounds, not like me. Apparently my back and leg aren’t the only thing that Warframe messed up. I saw some of Dagh’s logs saying I have some sort of...cog-ni-tive, er, mental head issue, although I have no clue what he’s talking about. I feel and think fine.” 

Fenrir cleared his throat. “I agree, you seem alright to me.” Which was a blatant lie. Inexperienced as he was, he could tell she acted a bit too...immature for her supposed age. “Tell me, does the old man actually care, or is he just trying to get me out of here?”

“E-eh? Well...I think he does. He wouldn’t be so upset if he just wanted to get you out. I have seen how he acts when he just wants someone gone.”

“Well, that's a first, then,” he said quietly. 

“You and Dagh don’t have a very happy past, I know. I know you also probably don’t believe he wants to make things up with you, right?”

“If he wanted to make things up, he would have a long time ago.”

“You were in jail. He couldn’t really get to you. That, and things have been...messy, as of recently. Warframes, Sentients, one of the Tenno has nearly succeeded in killing Elder Queen, she’s holding on by a fingernail, Alad V the Jellyfish stealing tubes and information, and now he has new Tubemen on top of everything else.”

He knew it to be the truth, as much as he didn’t want to admit it. “Sounds like I got out about the right time, then.”

“Yes. I think what you did was very noble. With the Warden, I mean.” she pat him on the head, mussing up his hair a bit.

“He had it coming, that’s for sure.” He was slightly disconcerted by the headpats, but decided not to say anything. Danya nodded in agreement.

“I have a question for you...if you don’t mind.” 

Fenrir felt like he knew what was coming. “What is it?”

“What did you do that got you in Saturn Six?”

He sighed. Even though he knew this would come up eventually, he wasn’t sure what to tell her. “Before I tell you, can I ask you a question?”

“Oh, sure.”

“What kind of person is he now?”

“Do you mean to us Tubemen or in general?”

“Both. He wasn’t great to his men either, when I was young.”

“Dagh must have been very different back then…”

“Well what’s he like now?”

“To us Tubemen, he treats us like we’re his biological children., and he treats regular soldiers really well too. Nobody is disposable. He’s very calm too. I think I’ve only seen him get really mad once, and that was at Alad, who makes everyone angry anway.”

“So, he was telling the truth…” he mused to himself. Then, noticing Danya’s look, he clarified. “He wasn’t all like that when I was here. He didn’t care about me, or the fact that it’s normal to make mistakes. I was punished for the wrong twitch of a finger, and his temper would flare at the smallest thing. He was a lot like the other Grineer generals, actually. He was very proud and selfish, and would only take notice of me if I did something that benefited him directly.”

“But, what did you do to go to jail?”

“Well, the short answer is...because of all that, I eventually tried to kill him.” 

Danya was silent for a long time, but still gave him water, which he took as a good sign. She seemed to be considering his answer, and although he tried to tell himself that he didn’t care, he found himself getting slightly worried that he had offended her. 

“I’m not sure what to say.” Her voice was almost a whisper. “It’s awful that you tried to kill Daugh, but he clearly wasn’t the same person he is now...even he says he didn’t like the way he was back then, and you’re not...you’re not bad either. Neither of you are bad.” she sniffled a bit, swallowing hard.

After a moment, Fenrir gave her a small smile. “Thank you.”

“I guess...you’re both kind of right, and kind of wrong. But...Dagh would want me to still be nice to you, cause Dagh’s not mad at you, so I won’t be either, Fen.” She lifted her mask, wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, and pushed a few stray locks of her black hair behind her ear before pushing it down. “But...please at least consider forgiving Dagh. I wouldn’t blame you if you're still mad, but at least think about it.”

He heaved a sigh. “Fine, I’ll think about it. But only because you’re my little sister.”

“Yay!” She wrapped her arms around his neck again, and this time, Fenrir didn’t seem to mind. “Thank you Fen. I can bring some of the others here to meet you sometime, if you'd like.”

“Maybe later, I don’t want to become an attraction.”

“You’re not, you’re family.”

Fenrir didn’t have a response to that. He’d never expected to be called that by a sister he’d never met before. She hugged him again, tighter, as if to let him know he wasn’t alone in this sealab, before jumping down and putting a folded cloth under his head.

“I remember being stuck on one of those slabs for hours, too. It’s not very comfortable.”

“I’ve been in worse conditions, but you’re right.” He gave her a grateful nod. 

She peered out the door into the darkened hallway. “I should probably leave, but I can come and see you again if you'd like. I don’t want to annoy you, I know I can be like that sometimes.”   
  


“You aren’t annoying, Danya. I’d like to have you come back.” He gave her another smile, bigger this time. She tapped a finger on the tip of his nose, picked up the bucket.

“I will Fen. Sleep well!” she patted him on the head, standing on her toes to do so, and left. Fenrir found himself smiling, thinking about her. 


	18. Orchids and Waterlilies Can’t Grow in the Same Garden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Which isn't true, but they're not going to listen to reason at this point.

Kelpie stood on the upper level of the sealab, prancing in a circle from sheer excitement. She was finally going to see Dakik in person. Well, that and get some answers about the Wolf of Saturn Six, but it was clear where her priorities were. Still, she did want answers, just...Dakik was there as well. It was convenient, she told herself. 

So here she was, now sitting pretty on a crate and waiting for him. She hadn’t been there long, but was already getting impatient in her eagerness to see him. She checked again that she’d hit send on the message, and sighed, tapping her foot. It was hard to be patient sometimes, especially in this case. It felt like forever since she'd seen him, and now he was only steps away. What was taking him so long?

She waited a bit longer, then decided to take matters into her own hands, and go find him. She hopped up, and headed out the door. Jump down the long elevator shaft, turn a few corners. She knew this place like the back of her hand from the time she spent with Tyl so long ago, and it was proving useful here. She knew what to expect.

Except for Saryn, that is.

Saryn was not having the best of days. It had been relatively fine, until she started thinking.

Tyl had been warming up to her considerably since he'd first found her watching the snow, and she had warmed up to him as well. A little too much, it seemed. He made her happy in a way nobody else she talked to quite managed. It was a special kind of joy that lingered, that she thought about constantly, her brain wandering over to the subject of the very intriguing and kind scientist who bothered to give her his time of day and made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside with an irritating, but welcome, regularity. Then it hit her like a ton of bricks.

She was in love in Tyl Regor. At least, possibly, but that looked like the only explanation for her feelings. She shuddered, her shoulders slumped. These feelings were very,  _ very  _ wrong. If it had been another Warframe, there would be no issue, but Tyl was a Grineer. An enemy, and yet she couldn't convince her heart, or him, for that matter. She knew it would never fly with him, he'd never want her. But still, she let herself toy with the fantasy of him loving her back, just a little bit. Maybe it was possible. She shut her eyes, letting herself daydream about it…   
  
“Saryn?!” They flew open to the sound of Kelpie’s choked-sounding voice. “What the hell are you doing here?” she asked, her hand twitching towards the massive sledgehammer on her back.

Saryn couldn’t answer, seemingly frozen in place, like a deer in headlights.

“You’re here on a mission, aren’t you? You’re here to desecrate this place, right? Poison it like you do everything else.” 

Saryn slowly started to back away from her, heart in her throat, her brain fumbling for words.

“You’re here to ruin this place, just like everything you touch, aren’t you?!” Kelpie yelled, pulling out Fenrir’s sledge. Saryn’s brain had ceased logical function at this point, and she felt like her legs had been rooted to the ground. She wanted to bolt, but she couldn’t make herself move. Her biggest fear had come true, and she could do nothing to prevent herself from getting hurt.

Kelpie moved forward towards her, and Saryn felt like her heart would explode. As she neared, Saryn tried to move out of the way, but stumbled right into the path of the sledge, which Kelpie had decided to swing. It hit her square in the gut, sending her flying backwards and crashing into the wall, she slumped against it, dazed, before staggering to her feet.

“Why-” her question was cut off by Kelpie swinging again. This time Saryn dodged, and it hit the wall with a sound so loud it made her ears ring. She wanted to pull out her Cyskis, but officially engaging with her was a terrible idea, both because it was a fight she knew she would lose without using her abilities, and it would make her look utterly irredeemable in the eyes of their colleagues, like she wasn’t that already.

Saryn rolled around her side, trying to get out of range of the swinging sledge, rather failing in that regard. Kelpie knew how to take advantage of its reach, striking fast and hard, hitting Saryn a few more times. Her vision was starting to blur, either from pain, or the tears starting to prick her eyes.

“Kelpie, wait!” she finally managed to make her throat work, holding a hand out to block another strike, looking up at Kelpie’s poised form. “Please, I’m not here to hurt anyone or wreck anything!”

“Liar!” Kelpie brought the sledge down, and though Saryn tried to move, she wasn’t quick enough, with her hand lingering just long enough to get crushed by the force of the swing. There was an audible, ugly crunch, and a brief silence. 

And then, pain. 

Saryn screamed in agony, long and loud, her broken hand twitching and spasming like a dying insect with its legs in the air, purplish-red Warframe blood oozing out from under the hammer head. Kelpie lifted it up slowly, her arms shaking, the magnitude of what she’d actually done hitting her in the face, like the universe had turned the sledge back on her. She hadn’t meant to lose her cool this way, and seeing the injury she’d caused made her feel sick, even if it was Saryn.

Said hand was completely mangled. The white metal skin was cracked and flaking, like shattered pottery shards, pieces having been shoved into and sticking out of her flesh, some stripped off completely and lying on the floor. The fingers themselves were all bent at odd angles, shards of bone poking out of her meat. Blood dripped from the cracks in her skin, running down her stomach and legs as she clutched it to herself, cradling it like that would make it stop hurting, kneeling hunched over it. She’d started crying, ugly, heaving sobs that stuck in her throat and choked her for a few moments, tears running down her face and chin under her helmet. 

Kelpie felt stricken, her heart threatening to beat its way out of her chest. She couldn’t move if she’d wanted to, fear and shock for what she’d done hitting her like a punch in the gut. She couldn’t look away from the scene, seemingly frozen as the images failed to register in her mind. 

Suddenly, she heard the sound of running footsteps, and looked up just in time to see Tyl Regor come around the corner, Ack and Brunt in hand. Saryn didn’t even register it, her head addled by pain. 

Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks, seeing both Saryn and Kelpie together, the former kneeling on the ground, cradling her hand, while the latter stood looking at her, holding what looked to be Fenrir’s lost hammer. Seeing that Saryn didn’t seem to be able to speak, he addressed Kelpie directly.

“What happened here?” he asked, trying to keep calm. 

Kelpie looked up briefly, before her eyes were drawn back to Saryn. “S-she was going to...hurt someone, or ruin something, so I...I made sure she wouldn’t. I lost my temper...I shouldn’t have...I should have waited...I’m sorry...” 

“Hold on,  _ you _ did this?” he asked, incredulous.

Kelpie could do nothing more than nod, and even that was a tentative, nervous motion.

Tyl struggled to maintain his composure, but inside he was completely torn. He valued both of them, but he had to maintain appearances. Anyone who was a friend to Saryn was an enemy of Kelpie, that she had made painfully clear, but Saryn needed help, at the very least she needed someone to wrap her hand up until she could get proper help, and he had grown very fond of her over the few months she’d been coming by. He didn’t want her to think he was abandoning her for Kelpie, and he resolved to send Kuda to help her once he got Kelpie out of earshot.

He put a hand on Kelpie’s shoulder and led her out. Saryn was curled up on the floor now, not registering anything, and his heart twisted.   
  
“Tyl I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for this to happen, I just-”

“I know, I know, calm down.” he said, shuntering her into a storage room, before stepping out and sending Kuda a message to go help Saryn.

At the moment, Kuda was trying, rather unsuccessfully, to flirt with Kuldain. She just couldn’t seem to come up with something to say, so they were in the middle of another uncomfortable silence when she got the message from the Commander. After a quick apology to the other Lich, she ran off to find Saryn. 

Only to find nothing but some shards of Warframe skin and trail of blood.

Confused, she began to follow the trail, getting more worried by the minute. After going down a few hallways, it finally ended at what looked to be just another random room, one that was honestly pretty easy to overlook. Kuda quickly slipped inside. 

Saryn was passed out cold on the floor. 

Kuda’s breath caught in her throat, and she ran to her side. As she neared, she noticed the pool of blood, and her ruined hand. She knelt down next to her, getting nervous, which only increased when she tried to wake Saryn, only for her to be completely unresponsive. Raw, unfiltered panic took over, and she began to scream at her to wake up, for someone to help, anyone…

She took a deep breath, trying to not completely lose it. She was still breathing, so she was obviously still alive. The best thing to do would be to get her to an actual bed and stop the bleeding as best she could.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_ “And here I thought you were never going to sleep again.”  _ the Witch cooed, running her hands over Saryn’s face in a gesture that would have been kind, had it been from anyone else. The bones from the last two dreams still littered the floor, the blood dried, crusty, and more brown than red. Actually, the whole hall looked worse for wear, the gold’s shine faded and the marble looking more grey than white. Everything seemed to have decayed a bit since last time, and just like last time, she’d rather be anywhere else.

_ “You know this is helping nothing.”  _ the veiled one, whom Saryn had dubbed ‘The Moth’ for her white coloring, overall delicate, soft demeanor, and the nervous way she flitted and fluttered around when she wasn’t curled up against a pillar, pointed out, her voice low and shy.

_ “Dearie, who ever said this was helping?” _ The Witch walked slowly in a circle around Saryn, eyeing her up and down. Her hands were twitching slightly, excited to get her hands into her.

_ “If you keep doing this, you’re going to lose your plaything permanently. S-she’s had enough of this!”  _ The Moth nervously said, trying to assert herself.

“ _ And who are you to say so? Do you need a reminder as to who is senior here?” _

_ “That would be me, actually. I came first.” _

__ _ “No, you came before me, but you’re only the second.”  _ the Witch said, trying to cover her displeasure.

“ _ Just because you assert yourself better than I do, doesn’t make you superior!”  _

__ _ “You’re too spineless to help, so I  _ am  _ superior.” _

__ To this, the Moth had no answer, and the Witch turned back to Saryn, seemingly satisfied.

And so began the ripping and tearing. It was almost routine at this point, although it didn’t hurt any less. Saryn dimly wondered if what she had done was truly bad enough to deserve all this, then shook her head weakly. If what she had done hadn’t been that bad, she wouldn’t be in this mess right now. Her despair crawled up her throat and stuck there, making her feel like she’d swallowed a chunk of ferrite. There was nothing to do but bear it, bear it until the bitter, gorey end. Hers, most likely. Even the desire to scream was starting to abandon her, and she stared at the ceiling dully, looking but not really seeing.

_ “Well, this is no fun.”  _ the Witch pouted once she was back to where she left off from the last dream.  _ “Why doesn’t this hit as hard?” _

__ _ “Maybe it’s time to stop, if that’s the case.”  _ The Moth peered out from behind a pillar, her voice wavering.

The Witch laughed, a high-pitched trilling sound that pierced to the center of Saryn’s mind. “ _ That isn’t it. No, I’m going further this time!” _

__ Foregoing the forge tongs at the moment, she wormed her fingers into the flesh, making small gaps she could slip them into, grabbing hold of her left femur. Saryn shut her eyes tightly, trying to pretend this wasn’t happening. Taking no notice, the Witch continued working her fingers into the stump of her leg, forcing her to feel everything.

_ “Quite a stubborn thing we have here.”  _ she said, twisting the bone to loosen it from it’s rightful place. Saryn could feel each small string of muscle and connective tissue being torn, and the Witch made sure to make it slow, so she felt every bit peeling off, like a piece of duct tape being pulled up. With a sudden, quick motion, tore the joint of her femur from it’s socket in her hip.

Saryn couldn’t find the breath to be able to scream, but every muscle in her body was pulled taut, as tears welled up, then fell from her eyes as she mentally broke apart. The Witch looked up at her.

“ _ There’s the reaction I was hoping for. What say we take this all the way, then?” _ She gripped her femur, and with a twist and a jerk, pulled it out of her leg with a slimy sucking noise. 

“ _ There was no need to go this far,”  _ hissed the Moth from behind the pillar. “ _ You could have let things lie.” _

__ _ “If you think that, you’re a fool. Buzz off, you had your turn to be all touchy feely.” _

__ The Moth took no heed of the Witch’s words. “ _ This did not have to happen! But no, you couldn’t just walk away.”  _

__ The Witch said nothing, simply turned her back and started work on Saryn’s other femur. The procedure was the same, squeezing more tears out of her already stinging eyes. And again, she pulled it out with the same sucking sound, if a bit wetter. She felt herself bleeding, her blood running out in little rivulets, leaving her, abandoning her like even her own blood didn’t want to be associated with her. She couldn’t say she blamed it. The Witch took this femur, went up to the Moth and smacked her in the head with it, making her squeal.

_ “You know nothing about this, so stay out!” _

__ Instead of replying, the Moth retreated to a safe distance once more, her hair and veil sprinkled with drops of blood.

_ “Why must you do things like this?” _

__ _ “Because you must learn not to question things.” _ The Witch brandished the femur again, making the Moth cower into a corner. 

She regained her forge tongs and clamped them around Saryn’s hip, over the large hole of her pelvis.

_ “The femur is connected to the pelvis~♪”  _ she sang cheerily.  _ “Well, it used to be, anyway.” _

__ She began applying pressure, increasing it in increments of about a minute. Every minute it got tighter. And tighter. Then it was denting her skin. Breaking through, pushing its way into her flesh. It burrowed in deep, hooking around her bone, and all the flesh blocking it’s exit.

_ “You ready?”  _

__ Saryn panikedly shook her head, pleading with her eyes. She could anticipate exactly how much that was going to hurt.

The Witch looked at her for a moment. “ _ Well, it really doesn’t matter either way.”  _ With that, she gripped and pulled, accompanied by a wet tearing sound. Saryn arched her back, her throat choked with a scream she couldn’t let out. Her tormentor held up her prize, her blood-dripping pelvis, a huge chunk of meat sticking to one side, and her uterus clinging to it. She felt a sudden, blinding panicked terror seize her, one she didn’t quite know the origin of. She was a Warframe, infertile, yet all that w _ as  _ running through her head at the moment was  _ no, no, please, no, not my womb, anything else, but not that!  _ Her lower torso felt empty. Just a hollow, fleshy cavity that had housed something important, which had been stolen away.

The Moth’s eyes were wide with horror, a hand clasped over her mouth, as if even she never saw this coming. The Witch looked painfully smug as she transferred the bone and organ to her hand.

_ “A useless body part for a useless Warframe. It’s surprising you even had one.” _

__ _ “Don’t say things like that!”  _ The Moth cried, covering her ears.  _ “Please, if anything, don’t say that. That’ll only make her deteriorate faster, and you want to keep her around for as long as possible, right?” _

__ _ “Hmm, true, but it’s so much fun to watch her reactions. I’ll have to think about that. But for now...”  _ she turned to Saryn.  _ “It’s time for you to wake up. Your prince in blue armor is probably waiting for you. Not that you have a chance with him.”  _

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“No, no, don’t touch that, don’t touch my womb!” Saryn bolted upright, thrashing and holding her good hand over it, trying to protect it, and in the process falling off the bed, finding herself caught in the arms of Tyl Regor. Only then did she realize that she was in the waking world, and not back there in the...well, she was awake. 

“What happened? Tyl? What are you doing here...and Kuda as well...what’s going on?”

As always, Tyl’s voice managed to soothe her, somewhat. “You must have fallen unconscious after dragging yourself here. What do you remember?”

“I remember Kelpie breaking my hand...and my nightmare, but nothing else.” She relaxed against his chest slightly. He looked down at her subtly, a bit surprised, but he didn’t push her off, instead settling for gently putting her back on the bed.

“You must have been delirious, not that I blame you. There really isn’t much to tell. After your hand was smashed, I took Kelpie away while Kuda tracked you down. She found you and brought you here. Your hand isn’t...fixed, but the shards are out and it’s bandaged until you can get it to one of your own who can fix it.”

“T-thank you. Er...where is Kelpie?”

“Occupied, don’t worry.” By that, he meant the last time he’d seen her, she’d been in Dakik’s arms. “ _ Very _ occupied.” Saryn simply nodded.

“Forgive me, Saryn, but may I ask why you were screaming about your womb?” Kuda spoke up, slightly nervous that the question might anger her. 

“She took it out with my pelvis.” she replied, drawing her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around her torso.

Tyl and Kuda were silent for a long moment, looking at each other. Finally, Tyl broke quiet. 

“I take that as to mean that you do have a uterus?” he asked curiously. 

Saryn shrugged. “I would like to say yes, but...I’m not sure I want to find out, at this point. The Witch might have kept that bit.” 

“It was only a dream, Saryn. Whatever she took from you there, she can not and did not take from you here. You’re safe.” he said, his voice surprisingly gentle.

This was meant with only silence, and what he could only assume was a grateful look, considering she still had her helmet on and was infinitely harder to read. Kuda gently pat her on the back. 

Just then, Tyl received a message, and he stepped away to take it. After a moment, he turned back around, his shoulders slumped. Kuda noticed.

“What’s wrong, Commander?” she asked, her voice quiet. 

He sighed. “Fenrir’s wounds aren’t healing as well as I had hoped. There’s signs of infection, which must be treated immediately.”

Kuda nodded. “It’s alright, I’ll stay with Saryn.”

“Thank you.” he left quickly.

Saryn was still as a statue, finally having taken her helmet off, and staring ahead, not really registering anything she saw. Kuda, not knowing what else to do, reached out and wrapped her arms around the frame, tucking her head into her shoulder. It brought Saryn back to the present, and at first she was shocked, but then, something deep within her broke, and the tears finally came.

“W-why are you being so nice to me?” she wailed between her sobs.

“Because I want to.” She hugged Saryn tighter. 

“B-but...I don’t deserve it…” 

“That doesn’t matter to me. I’m being nice, and that’s the way it is.”

“You’re an angel, Kuda.” She said, sniffling. “I’m going to help you get with Kuldain for this, I promise.”

It was Kuda’s turn to be surprised, and she almost denied Saryn’s help. Almost.

“I’d like that, Saryn. Thank you.”

Saryn smiled weakly at her, hugging her back. After that, it was quite some time before either of them moved away from each other. The Lich patted her on the shoulder once they parted, and for the first time after one of her nightmares, she actually felt a little better.


	19. The Fenrisúlfr

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fenrir gets pets, Kelpie gets confused, Saryn thinks she gets what she wants.

“Oberon?” a quiet voice, wavering slightly like the owner was in pain, or on the verge of tears. Seeing as how Ivara was glaring over his shoulder, he turned around to find Saryn standing behind him, head down and shoulders slumped, her left hand bandaged, with all the fingers bending in the wrong ways and cradled in her right arm.

“What are you doing here?” Ivara asked, staring her down. Oberon put a hand on her shoulder, and she sighed but back up.

“I’m sorry.” Saryn squeaked, looking like a kicked kubrow puppy. “I-I need help is all. M-my hand’s broken, and I just need it healed. It shouldn’t take too long.” 

“Why didn’t you ask Trinity? She’s the one that usually deals with injuries like this.” he asked gently, trying to not be openly contemptful. In truth he felt a bit of pity for her, seeing her like this, and however he felt about her outside of his role as a healer, he still was one, and he saw it as his duty to help, no matter his personal feeling about the patient.

“I did ask her. She wouldn’t help me. T-told me to go jump off the relay, so I came to you. I don’t know of anyone else who could fix it.”

He clucked his tongue. “Shameful. Trinity, I mean. May I see your hand?”

She nodded, offering it to him, and he took it, slowly unwrapping the bandages, and flinching once he saw the extent of the damage underneath. “What happened to you?” he asked, not needing to feign his concern.

“It got smashed when some crates fell on it.” She said quickly. That, he decided, was absolutely a lie, but she didn’t look to be in any condition for an interrogation, and he resolved to look into it later. “Will you help me? Please? I can’t use this hand at all, and it really hurts. I’ll pay you if you want, I just need this healed.” she said, in a tone that made it very clear what she assumed the answer would be.

“ Sure, I’ll help.” he said kindly, and she looked up in shock. He sat her down and took his place next to her, holding out his hand. “Alright, lay your hand out flat on top of mine.” 

“W-why are you helping me?” she asked, doing as she was told. 

“Because you need it. You can’t function like this.” he replied, his other hand glowing with the activated Renewal. He began to brush his fingers over her injuries, and her eyes widened under her helmet, watching her wounds slowly start to knit themselves back together. He placed his hand over hers to speed it up, doing his best to keep her calm.

She grimaced under her helmet, as the action of bones and flesh putting themselves back in place is not a painless experience. But, soon enough, it was done. She stood, and bowed to Oberon, unsure of what to say.

“I-I wish...well...thank you.” she said, flexing her fingers, all bending the right way.

“It was nothing, really.”

“I-is there something I can do in return?” she asked nervously, looking down.

“You don’t owe me a thing, it’s fine. Just doing my job.”

She bowed again, deeper this time. “Thank you.” she said, hating the waver in her voice.

“You’re welcome.” He stood up and turned to leave, Ivara following. She watched, feeling like she had missed an opportunity.

“Why didn’t you rat me out?” Kelpie hissed in her ear. Saryn had retreated to an isolated corner of the relay to try and relax, but apparently she wasn’t as alone as she thought. She whirled around, finding Kelpie standing behind her, and her heart dropped into her stomach.

She stayed silent, not looking at her, hoping that she’d just leave. But, when she looked back up, she was still there, glaring down at her, hands on her hips. She sighed; it seemed there wouldn’t be an easy way out of this. 

“Do you really want to know, or are you just going to run me off like last time?” she muttered, looking down again. 

“You could have so easily ousted me for it, but you lied! Why? I don’t get it.”

“You think anyone would have believed me?”

Kelpie went to answer, but then stopped, thinking about it. If she had told them the truth, what would happen? Would they really believe that Saryn, the manipulator that she was, would be telling them the truth? Or would they simply turn their noses up at her, passing it off as another lie, just one more to add to the pile? As much as she hated to admit it, Saryn was right. 

“Even if they did, you wouldn’t be in any trouble anyway.” she continued, trying to think of a way to book it without seeming rude. 

“Of course I’d be in trouble!” she said. 

Saryn shook her head. “Think about it, you’re smarter than this. Even if you told them, they’d just hail it as self-defense, and I’d look all the worse for it, even though I didn’t raise a hand to you. You’re their golden child, who can do no wrong, and I’m the outcast, who can do no right. It wouldn’t have mattered, even if you killed me, because everyone here despises me, and until that changes, I’m an easy, wide open target.”

“But-” She stopped. Inside, she knew it to be right. 

“I’m not mad at you. I don’t blame you for doing what you did. You have every right to want to see me hurting and broken. Don’t feel bad about it, please. It’s not worth expending your emotions to feel guilt over me.”

Kelpie was completely lost for words, as what Saryn had said hit her. She didn’t like Saryn one bit, but...did she really deserve this? Why was she excusing this? What she’d done to her was inexcusable, yet here she was brushing it off like it was nothing.

“Besides, it’s not like I don’t deserve it.” Saryn murmured, looking down at the floor. “So it’s fine.”

Kelpie wasn’t fine with it. “W-what? But-”

“No, don’t worry about it. I’ve had it, and worse, coming for a long time now. I really am sorry for everything I’ve done, to you and others, and if this is the only way I can atone, so be it. I’ll live.”

Kelpie stood there feeling worthless. She’d smashed her previous tormenter’s hand, and in the process, committed the worst thing she’d ever done. But...Saryn had deserved this, right? So why was she feeling so bad about it? She looked up to see Saryn was gone, having left without another word. Kelpie decided she needed to talk to someone about it, and started to ponder who.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saryn breathed a sigh of relief as she made her way down into the Titania sealab. She hadn’t expected to have to talk the ordeal over with Kelpie, and wasn’t feeling her best. She didn’t understand why Kelpie had brought it up in the first place, but then, she didn’t know Kelpie that well to begin with, and she probably never would, so she couldn’t really judge. Pushing the thought from her mind, she focused on finding Tyl. She was seriously considering just confessing to him, not because she thought he reciprocated, but because she really didn’t have anyone to tell about her feelings other than him, and she felt it would help her to get it off her chest. Who knows, maybe he did feel the same way.

After a moment, she stopped. She could hear something, a faint noise, coming from the same direction as Tyl’s main lab. Moving closer, she recognized it as something similar to a whining kubrow, except much deeper. Curious now, she found the door it seemed to be coming from. Had Tyl gotten a new pet? Well...kind of.

She peered inside, and saw a figure tied down to a slab. A large figure. 

Suddenly, the figure spoke. “I can hear you. You may as well come in, instead of gawking from the doorway. I’m not going anywhere.” his voice was deep and gruff, but had a pleasant, smooth quality to it.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to...you’re...the Wolf of Saturn Six? What are you doing here!?”

He gave a rueful laugh, turning his head to take a better look at her. “Well, I could ask a Warframe the same thing. How about a trade: a secret for a secret?” 

“Fair enough.” she said, pulling up a barrel and sitting next to him.

“You first, as yours is probably easier in the telling.” 

“Hah! I wish. The short version is Tyl and I are friends, and he lets me come here, so I came. You?”

He took a deep breath. “I suppose I deserve that. Well, I was taken apart by a group of Warframes, well, one in particular, with a nasty set of jaws. A large chunk of my left side was ripped out, as well as having my right hand reduced to little more than pulp. I’m not allowed to move much at all, for fear of ripping out the hundreds of stitches holding me together. Thus, me being tied down to this slab, no food, no water, and nothing to do but lie here.”

“But why did you come here?”

“There was literally nowhere else I could turn to, and have even a small chance of living. That’s mostly because Tyl Regor is my father.”

“Wait...so you’re just a big Tubeman? Seriously?”

He sighed. “Technically speaking, yes. But more truthfully, I was an experiment, used to determine how likely the program was of succeeding. From the look of things, they outdid themselves.” He pulled against his bindings, trying to adjust to a more comfortable position, and failing. 

“You speak of him like you’re not too fond of him.” she said, helping him twist his ankles and wrists around a bit.

“I’m not, although I’ve been told that he’s changed since I was last here. Remains to be seen, though I’m not holding out much hope.” He nodded his thanks to her.

“So, this is what Tyl’s biggest regret is…” she murmured, almost to herself. “I don’t know much about how he was back then, but I do know him now, and he’s good. I don’t think he’s the kind to be starving you, so I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that you’re too proud to ask him for anything.”

After a moment, he nodded. “All of the Tubemen and other soldiers keep their distance, with a single exception, so I don’t really have much chance. You wouldn’t mind giving me some water?” he asked meekly. 

“You’re just a big puppy, aren’t you?” she smiled warmly, bringing him some in a metal cup, freeing his good hand and giving it to him. 

He drank deeply, and handed it back. “Thank you. I must admit, I’m not sure how to take that statement.”

“You’re a lonely boy who just wants attention. I get that.”

“That’s sweet of you. Maybe being here has made me too soft. I can’t wait to get out of here, if I’m honest.”

“I take it that means you want nothing to do with Tyl once you’re fixed up.”

“Correct. I hold no desire anymore for a relationship with him. Those dreams were stomped out a long time ago.” He looked away. “It’s not something that I let get in the way anymore.”

“Are you sure that’s what you want, Wolf?” she asked, finally understanding Tyl’s stress over the last few weeks.

“You can call me Fenrir, you’ve been nice enough for that. And, to answer your question, I used to believe that, without a second thought. But now, I’m not so sure. I mean, both you and Danya have given him basically glowing reviews, which wasn’t the case back then.”

“I suppose I should give you my name then. It’s Saryn, and if you want my advice... stick around and see how he is for a while before leaving permanently. I’m definitely biased in this situation though, so maybe I’m not the most trustworthy.”

“What, you got a crush on him or something?”

She blushed, looking down. “I-I mean, I like him, yeah.”

Fenrir laughed softly. “How about that, a Warframe has a crush on a Grineer. If he’s as good as you say, I hope it goes well for you.”

“Aren’t you a sweetheart under all that rough attitude?” she said, petting him on the head. 

“Not really, I’m just not as twisted as the rumors claim.” He gave her a wink. 

She blushed. “Are you hungry at all?”

He nodded. “I could definitely eat something, but I don’t want to trouble you.”

“Nonsense. I’ll be right back.” She skipped out the door, coming back sometime later with a tin of the same stuff she’d been given when she met Kuda’s friend. 

“So, they’re still serving this after all these years?” he laughed. 

“It’s actually pretty good. Better than what I’ve heard you guys are fed elsewhere.”

He took a few bites, and was surprised to find she was right. “This is better than I remember. Definitely better than it was back then.”

“It is the first time you’ve been home in years. Maybe you just didn’t remember. A lot of things seem so different after a huge change.”

“You’re probably right.” He continued eating like he was starving, which he probably was, Saryn thought. It didn’t take him long to finish. “That hit the spot. Thank you, Saryn.”

“Not a problem, Fenrir. Consider it a favor, because meeting you has brought so much context to some of the things Tyl’s told me, and I finally understand it now, at least a little bit.”

He nodded to her. “Perspective is a powerful thing. It’s helped me understand things about people that I wouldn’t have guessed at.” he said quietly.

Saryn ruffled his hair. “You too, eh?”

He gave a rueful laugh. “I suppose so. In all seriousness, thank you for being willing to talk to me. It helps pass the time, if nothing else.”

“Does nobody else come here? Just Danya and I?”

“Tyl will come every once in a while, just to check how I’m doing, but those visits last only long enough for him to give me a good look over, and nothing more. It’s little more than an excuse for him, I think. Not that I blame him, but...if he wants to say something, he should just come out and say it, instead of just thinking about it.”

“He probably expects you to just snap at him. I don’t think this situation is easy on him either, and what do you say to an estranged son who’s been in prison for years without so much as a postcard?”

Fenrir was silent for a long moment. “I suppose that’s fair. But, there’s also the fact that I didn’t want to come back into contact with him ever again. I felt like we’d both done too much to the other for things to be patched up, and I was content to leave it at that.”

“He didn’t agree?”

“Well, a lot can happen when you’re in prison for years, then on the run for several more. A lot can change in that time, and I suppose that it’s fair to say that from what I’ve seen, he isn’t what he used to be. If he was, he wouldn’t have taken me in at all, much less fixed me up. That, I can admit, at least.”

“But after everything, it’s hard to forgive, right?” she asked, her mind going back to her own issues.

“...Yes, it is. Very hard. I know he’s changed, but at the same time I can’t connect this version of him to the one I knew then, I can’t see them as different people, at least not now. Maybe that will change with time.”

“It seems to have changed a bit already, in the time you’ve been here.”

He took a deep breath, as if to rouse himself. “Yes, well, like I said: maybe I’m getting too soft.” 

Saryn shook her head. “That isn’t a bad thing, you know. And you don’t have to let it get in the way of what you do.”

“It won’t. First thing I’m gonna do is get my hammer back,” he growled. 

“Aww, but I like you soft. You’re a very pleasant conversational partner this way. As for your hammer...well...your chances of getting it back are slim, and not just because a Warframe has it, because  _ Kelpie  _ has it.”

“You know her?” he asked curiously. 

“I...I know her, yes. That story would take a lot of explaining, though.” 

“Sounds like you two have a rough history.”

Saryn didn’t answer for quite some time. When she finally did, her voice was soft and low. “You could say that.”

“If you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine.” 

Saryn shook her head. “It couldn’t hurt more than it already does.” She sighed deeply. “Well, it started a while back, when she stepped out of her tube. I didn’t like her for several reasons, none of which really matter. Suffice to say, she was different, really different. I got jealous, and started plotting against her, trying to get her to leave, or something of the like. All of a sudden, come to find out, my actions had turned basically everyone against me, including one frame I used to have a crush on. It was then that I truly realized what I’d done, and because of it, I was ousted in front of everybody, publicly humiliated, and even how, I’m hated by the vast majority of them. So...you could say I deserve the position I’m in now.”

Fenrir was silent for a while as he took in all of what she’d said. “Well, I can see where you’re coming from. But I have to say that it sounds like you think you’ll continue like this until the end of time, and I can’t say that I agree. I don’t think that you’ll be here forever, and though it might seem like a long time, it takes time for people to change.”

“I feel like it will continue forever, or at the very least, years, but thank you anyway. It’s actually how I ended up meeting Tyl. I ...want to find somewhere I could be alone, away from my comrades, and I started coming here, because it was surprisingly beautiful when it snowed. Then he caught me, but let me stay, and he’s been being so nice to me.

He shook his head. “I have to say, that’s not the Tyl I remember. Back when I was young, he would have killed you, no questions asked.” He went silent, considering. Eventually, he spoke again, his voice quiet. “Maybe I’ve been the one holding on to the past, and not him. I can see why you like him, at the very least.”

She nodded, her face going crimson again. “So, you’ll stay, then?”

“I won’t make any promises, but...I’ll think about it. And I suppose you’ll be busy thinking about my dad as well?”

“I was thinking of confessing, actually.” She said almost whispering “I don’t think he loves me back, but...I just want it off my chest, I guess.”

“I wish I could say which way he swings, but if this conversation is much to go by, then he’d be lucky to have you,” he said, smiling at her.

“You’re just saying that because I came in here and mothered you for a bit.”

“Well, that’s part of it. If you treat him like you’ve treated me, things will work out fine.” 

“I hope so.” she caught herself smiling again, and she smoothed his hair back. 

“You’ll be fine.” He was honestly enjoying her small touches, as they were something he’d never really received before. 

“You’ve been very sweet, and I thank you for that.” She found herself wishing that more people would treat her the same way, and pushed those thoughts down. She deserved the treatment she was getting now, and either it would let up, or it wouldn’t.

Suddenly, he yawned, and Saryn felt bad. “I’ve been keeping you awake, haven’t I?”

“I don’t mind. It was nice having someone to talk to like this. Danya’s really cute but she’s...not one for adult topics.”

“I haven’t met her yet, but I’ll keep that in mind.” She patted his shoulder. “I’m going to let you sleep, but I’ll come see you before I leave.”

Fenrir waved her off. “Go do what you’ve gotta, it’s not like I’m going anywhere. At least, not soon.”

She waved back to him as she left, then went to find Tyl. 

Lucky for her, he was alone, standing outside watching the sky, and the leviathans slithering through the crashing tide. She sidled up next to him, trying to appear calmer than she felt. In truth it felt like someone had used her stomach to bottle a hurricane, and she wanted to laugh at the irony. She could face down innumerable hordes of deadly foes without flinching, but she couldn’t conduct this one very simple interaction without her knees turning to jello. 

“Tyl?”

He turned around, mildly surprised to see her there. “Saryn, hello. I wasn’t expecting to come across you today.”

“Why not?” she asked, not expecting the comment.

“I had assumed that you’d heard all of what was going on, and that you’d choose to stay away.”

“I was talking with Fenrir, so I must have missed it. What, did a lot of things go wrong?”

“You could say that today hasn’t been one to write home about. Wait, Fenrir? You’ve met him?”

“Yeah, I heard whining and went to investigate. He’s a pretty nice guy, when it comes down to it. Just a big wolf puppy who wants some pets.” she said, trying and failing to keep the affectionate tone out of her voice.

“How is he doing?” Tyl couldn’t help but sound a little worried.

“He’s fine. Still bitter, but I think it's starting to melt a bit.”

“Looks like you’ve got my secrets all figured out then.” he said quietly, locking eyes with her.

Suddenly, she felt horrible. “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t intend to-” 

He waved her apology away. “They probably would have come to light anyway, seeing how Fenrir is back.”

Saryn’s voice was quiet. “I didn’t tell anyone, I swear. I...I’m just happy I understand you a bit better now. You’ve always been a bit of an enigma, not just to me, but all the Tenno, and it’s nice to know a little more about your past, even if it’s not pretty. My past is uglier than a rotting, maggot filled corpse, so it’s not like I’m any better, or in a position to judge you.” 

He sighed. “You’re right, of course. But, that still doesn’t make it comfortable. I’m sure you know what it’s like to have your past brought before your peers against your will.” He turned back to watch the sky, hands clasped behind his back. 

She nodded slowly, unsure of whether she’d offended him or not. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright. It was bound to happen, and I don’t blame you at all.” He swept a hand out in front of him, indicating the view laid out before them. “The sky is beautiful tonight, is it not?”

Saryn felt like all her built out confidence had been drained out of her, and was acutely aware of how he had seemed to just wilt. “Earth has better skies. It’s clearer more often, and closer to the sun, so dusk and dawn are always colorful, and at night you can see tons of stars. Not like here, where it's mostly stormy.”

“Fair enough, but there is a certain beauty in a storm, in the way it cannot apply itself to concepts such as fairness, loyalty, or honor. It simply  _ is _ , and to me, that in itself is a form of beauty.” He took a deep breath. “But, I digress. You didn’t come here to listen to me ramble.”

“I like listening to you talk about something you have a passion for. Would be nice if someone would talk about me like that.” she gave a small, rueful smile.

“Who’s to say nobody will?” he asked, turning to her. Saryn felt her chest tighten, and her heart may have skipped a beat. She couldn’t be sure. She hopped from one foot to the other like a jittery songbird.

“It’s a nice thought to play with. Once everything is said and done, maybe someone will be able to love me one day.”

“Maybe there’s someone closer to you than you may think.” He looked away again, back out across the ocean. 

_ Stop it Saryn, stop hoping. _

“I wish.”

They shared a comfortable silence for a time, simply gazing at the view together. The sky was turning to a light crimson, reflected in the ocean. 

“I wish it was you.”

Her words hit Tyl like a ton of bricks. She had a crush on him? He snuck a glance at her: she was turned away, eyes downcast, not looking at anything. It was more than a crush, she was completely smitten. He knew that now, he’d have to make a choice, lie and say yes, or say no and break her heart. He was fond of her, and maybe at some point that could grow into similar feelings, but at the moment, he couldn’t say he felt the same . But on the other..she was  _ deeply _ in love with him, and her mental state was so fragile. If he said no, even if it was in the kindest way he could, it might break her. He didn’t want to see her fall into a depression, or worse. Then there was the overwhelming thought of  _ she’s a Warframe, I’m a Grineer, holy shit this is so wrong, you absolute dolt, what have you done? _

And then there was the tiny, miniscule part of him that was starting to question whether he was just fond of her.

Saryn finally snuck a peek up at him. He hadn’t moved, hadn’t spoken, just...nothing. She sighed internally, trying to keep the tears from her eyes. She knew it was too good to be true, and yet, she went ahead and wanted it anyway. 

_ Stupid stupid idiot Warframe. You’re eternally unlovable. _

Silently, she turned to leave. She had hoped for too much, and should probably cut her losses. Wiping her eyes, she began to walk away. 

“Saryn, wait.” Tyl reached out and grabbed her upper arm gently.

She stopped and looked up at him, her tear-filled eyes questioning.

“I just wasn’t sure what to say, is all. I never expected to hear that from you, but I’m glad I did.” in actuality it had taken him a few moments to build up the will to lie straight to her face, and it felt more disgusting than he first thought, but she needed someone. 

Saryn’s face broke into the most delighted smile he’d ever seen on a person. “A-are you sure?” 

He nodded. “Yes, I’m sure.” 

Saryn let out a squee of joy, and ran up to him, wrapping her arms around him in the biggest display of emotion he’d ever seen out of her. Surprised, and slightly nervous to show too much, he wrapped one of his arms around her. 

He felt very slimy inside. He was, after all deceiving her, even if it was for her own good. He  _ knew  _ her psyche couldn’t take a rejection, and so he’d accepted. What else could he do? Maybe this would prove to be good for her. She needed support, support she clearly wasn’t getting from her allies, and if she was ever going to improve, she couldn’t be left alone. Once she was in a good place mentally, then he would tell her the truth. Hopefully, she would forgive him for it. He really was quite fond of her, after all.

“I love you, Tyl.”

He hugged her closer, hoping for his feelings to sort themselves out. 

As if things were ever that simple.


	20. In the Shadows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saryn and Tyl bond over ass kicking

There had been a definite change to Saryn in the past month. Anyone who interacted with her noticed it, although she’d still regularly avoid the other frames if she could. She seemed almost happy, like a wilting flower that had finally been watered regularly. Umbra couldn’t be sure, but he could have sworn that he’d caught her humming at one point.

Of course, she was doing her best to tamp down her newfound joy. If she showed it too much, the others would get suspicious, and she didn’t want to think about where that would lead, but it was difficult. After all, if someone found out, what would happen? She shook her head, trying to clear her mind. It wouldn’t do any good to dwell on it.

Umbra was watching her curiously from a distance, trying to work out exactly what had changed. It wasn’t like her to be upbeat and cheerful, something she was even communicating in the way she walked. No longer was she slumped over, looking at the ground, afraid to meet anyone’s gaze. She held herself up, looking forward, paying attention to things that happened around her. This wasn’t like her at all.

Finally, he decided to walk over and just ask her. Saryn looked up as he approached, trying not to shrink back. Umbra was close with Kelpie, and this could only spell disaster for her. 

“Hello, Saryn. How are you?” he asked, trying to keep things casual. 

“Er...fine. You?” she asked, desperately trying to bury her happiness in as deep a pit as she could conjure up.

“Not bad. You seem better these last few weeks.”

“W-what? I’m not, I promise I’m not.”

“Forgive me, but I’ve noticed that you seem to be different, happier, almost. I mean no offense.”

Saryn crossed her arms. “What, has something changed? Have you seen me talking to Kelpie, or hanging around the others? Because my talk with Kelpie was one time, and I’ve spoken to nobody but Hildryn and Harrow, so I don’t know what you’re on about.” 

Umbra sighed. He wasn’t going to get any answers from her, not that he blamed her. “Apologies, I was merely curious. I’ll leave you be.” 

Saryn watched him turn on his heel, and walk away, feeling like she’d just dodged a bullet. If word got out that Tyl Regor was her boyfriend, all hell would break loose. She couldn’t go through that again, let alone the fallout that would happen after the fact. It might even put Tyl in some kind of danger, and then who’s fault would it be? No, better to keep him safe. If she had his love, she had what she needed to be happy. She let out a happy sigh at the thought of him, letting her mind take her away. It was a new feeling for her, being loved in a romantic way, and she wanted to revel in it for a bit before calming down. 

Umbra glanced back at her. Yes, there was definitely something different about her. He decided to go ask someone else about it, someone who had been close to her before. 

“Mag?” 

“Umbra. What’s up?” She turned to face him, putting down the gun she’d been cleaning. 

“I wanted to ask you about Saryn. She’s not the same sad, self-loathing person she was, at least, not entirely, and I guess I just want to find out why.”

Mag immediately darkened when he mentioned Saryn. “No, I can’t say that I know about it. I don't interact with her anymore, you see. Manipulative bitch.”

Umbra nodded. “I understand. It just has me so confused, because her mood doesn’t change basically overnight, and yet, she seems almost...happy.”

“She doesn’t deserve it, I’ll tell you that. Maybe she’s drugging herself or something. She’s definitely scummy and desperate enough to stoop that low.”

“I don’t think so, she’s too smart for that.” He sighed. He’d hoped to find answers, but nothing was forthcoming. “Anyway, thanks for your time.” 

Mag gave him a curt nod. “Not a problem. You’re worth the time of day, unlike her. I wish she’d be miserable for the rest of whatever pathetic life she has.”

Instead of disagreeing, Umbra merely nodded in return, making his exit. If he was honest, he didn’t want to see Saryn down and out forever, and although what she’d done was horrible, he held out a small hope in the back of his mind that she’d make a recovery. 

Of course, with every recovery comes pain.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tyl was surprised at the effect this little scheme was having, making his guilt and his confused feelings grow in equal measure.

If he had to guess, this was as close to the old Saryn as he’d ever seen her. Cheery, sugary sweet, far more gentle, less cynical, even a little motherly, and helpful to a fault. That last one proved to be quite a blessing, as she was more than willing to pitch in wherever she could. Anything from getting him specimens and resources, to just keeping him company, even being rather adept at handling the little Tubemen once she got some training in her. He hadn’t realized just how much time he spent by himself, and was honestly rather glad for her company. 

Which was a bit of a problem.

He found himself wrestling with his feelings almost daily now. He did not love her, he did  _ not. _ And yet...if he was honest, he found himself smiling more while she was around, as well as enjoying all of the hugs. He didn’t quite know what to make of it, except that it was very, very wrong, and that there was no easy way out of the situation.

Saryn was merely happy to have Tyl, and she showed it. She knew it was wrong, but things would work out fine, as long as nobody knew. She didn’t detect the reservations he had, nor did she notice any indication that their relationship was unhealthy. For her, as far as she knew, things were fantastic.

For now, at least. 

“Tyl? You available? I need your help with something.”

“What is it?”

“Ok, I know this is a big thing to ask, but...would you go on a mission with me?”

“Why do you ask?” he wondered, curious as to why she’d ask the question.

“Both Hildryn and Harrow are busy, and it’s a mission on Lua. I hate doing those alone. They’re creepy.”

He nodded. “I can come, if we don’t take too long. I do have duties to attend to, after all.”

“Y-you will?” 

“I have some free time at the moment, and besides, it’s been awhile since I was out in the field.” He patted her on the head. 

“Er...have you ever fought the Corrupted before?”

He nodded. “A long time ago, yes. I’m more well-travelled than I seem.”

“Do you remember it, then? If it was that long ago, the experience might have slipped a bit. They’re...unpleasant.”

“I’m no pushover myself, you know. I’ve fought worse.” He smiled under his mask at the memory. “Story for another time, however. Just know that I’ll be fine.” 

“Alright, I’ll trust you. It’s not too hard, just kill some things on Plato and get out.”

“Sounds simple enough.” He picked up his Ack and Brunt, holstering the pair. “Whenever you’re ready.”

The trip to Lua was uneventful, except for Saryn feeling like there were ghosts touching her shoulders the whole time. Lua was creepy, and even just being near it was enough to make her shiver.

“I hate Lua.” she said, eyes already sick of the boring gold and white color scheme with almost nothing to break it up.

“It’s definitely not the best place to be.” Tyl patted her on the back. “You Warframes really don’t seem to like this place. I overheard Loki telling Kuda something similar.”

“It’s so...eerie and empty. Feels like it’s haunted. I don’t know, maybe it’s just us. This place doesn’t bother you, does it?”

He sighed. “It’s definitely not my favorite place to be, but it doesn’t hit my nerves as much as it does yours, I think.”

She reached out gingerly, clinging to his arm. “Let’s just get this over with, alright?”

“We’ll be fine, alright? It’ll be over before you know it.” 

Saryn released his arm, checking her Dual Cyskis before nodding at him. “I’m ready, I think.”

“Just...one question before we head in.”

“What is it?” She turned to face him. 

“What are the chances we run into one of your colleagues?”

“Fuck, I never thought of that! I mean...it’s not likely, since everyone hates Lua and tries to avoid coming here as much as possible, but...still, it could happen. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked you to come. I’m so  _ stupid. _ ” She hung her head, feeling ashamed. 

“Hey, it’s alright. Like you said, this place isn’t exactly somewhere the others go, so I think we’re safe. Besides, forgetting something doesn’t make you stupid.” 

“This could put you in danger, or it could put me in the path of some serious backlash.”

“Well, if that happens, we can pretend like you ran into me here, and we’re depending on each other to get through the mission. Unless you have a better idea?” he wondered.

“That seems good.” she said slowly. “Let’s just hope it doesn’t happen.”

Tyl patted her on the back, and moved forward, taking point. Saryn nervously fell in behind him, bringing up the rear, still just a bit worried. 

It wasn’t long before they ran into the first group of enemies, milling around a long, sloping hallway. Saryn cut through them easily, her spores eating them away. Tyl stood by, watching her work. It was mesmerising, in a way, her actions smooth and calculated, every movement having a purpose. Before a minute had passed, they were gone, and Saryn returned to his side. 

“Alright,we can move on.”

“Yes, we can. Also, that was very impressive.” he praised. 

“It was nothing. I can do far more impressive things, if I’m forced to.”

He blinked. “I don’t doubt it, not after that display. Moving forward, though.” 

She nodded. Tyl once again took the front, while Saryn watched their backs. They moved through a couple more groups of enemies with no trouble, Tyl only giving minor assistance, when needed. He admired the way Saryn moved, her measured confidence coming through in every action she made. It was almost like she was a different being altogether, one who didn’t have the emotional baggage that she did outside the mission, and her abilities showed themselves to be something truly terrifying. 

The thing about her abilities, Tyl thought, wasn’t that they focused on spreading toxic spores and miasma, it was the sheer amount of damage they inflicted, and the control with which she wielded them. She could move through a crowd, and they would melt to nothing seconds later, or she could slowly draw out a single enemy’s death. All in all, she was a one-person army, capable of wiping out huge clusters of enemies at a time. 

And suddenly, just like that, she was back by his side like nothing had happened. 

“I’ve not been letting you do much, sorry.”

“It’s alright, I haven’t really gotten to pay much attention to Warframes in action. You’re quite something to watch.” He patted her on the shoulder.

“I’m nothing special, really. There are others who are more capable than I am.” She took a moment to just breathe. “Well then, shall we continue? If you want to do more, just tell me.”

“I might as well, you did bring me along, after all. Honestly, I’d be content to just watch you work, if you’re alright with that.” 

“Uh…”

“But, I did bring my weapons, so I might as well use them.” 

She nodded quickly and turned away, trotting down the hall, and he got the distinct impression she’d rather he participate than sit back and watch. Well, he was more than happy to oblige. 

They kept moving forward, running into more enemies, Tyl sharing the load this time. At first, it wasn’t that bad, there being only small groups of them. But soon, there began to be more, and they started taking notice that their comrades were being cut down. They began to get swarmed by them, making Tyl realize why she’d asked him to come along. Being Corrupted, the enemies didn’t fall back, or retreat. They came in full force, and they kept coming until they were dead, blindly continuing to fight until fully dispatched of. He found himself wondering how any frame could do this alone. 

“How did you handle doing this solo?”

“I shut my eyes until my blades stopped meeting flesh.”

He nodded. “That’s a good way to go about it.” 

“It was scary, I won’t deny it. There were many times where I thought I was going to die, but I didn’t, so…”

“I’m glad you didn’t.” He took a moment to kill an enemy creeping up behind him. “I’m happy to be here with you.” 

“At least someone is.”

Before long, the massive swarm subsided, and the pair was able to take a breath. Tyl gave Saryn a pat on the back. “I think you hold up better than you give yourself credit for.” 

“Maybe.” she said, and he’d bet money she was blushing under her helmet.

“Anyway, are we done here?” he asked. 

“Almost. Just a few more-” she cut herself off as the light began to flicker, shadows filling their vision.

“Saryn, what was that?”

“S-stalker…” 

“Here?! What’s he doing?!” 

“He...he’s here to try to kill me.” She looked around, trying to spot him. 

“What? Why?”

“Oh, he does it to every Warframe sooner or later. He’s Hunhow’s lapdog you see. Everytime we kill someone important, he comes after us as some sort of vengeance. It’s kind of pathetic really, but he’s a bitch to kill.”

“He’s not getting away with it this time,” Tyl growled, as the lights flickered again.

“Oh don’t worry, I’ll be fine. You forget I can handle myself, if not emotionally, at least in combat. Besides, I want to show off for you.” 

“Well, if you get into trouble, I’m stepping in.” He looked her in the eyes, as the thought occurred to him that maybe he cared more about her than he’d initially thought. She smiled at him before replacing her helmet.

“Aww, look at you, big strong boy protecting his lady. How sweet.” she said, her tone both joking but sincere, as if she really did appreciate the thought.

He patted her on the back, about to say something when the lights flickered a final time. Stalker appeared out of a cloud of smoke, Saryn and Tyl backing away slowly, trying to make as much space as possible before he attacked. 

“I’ve got this,” Saryn whispered to him, and Tyl nodded. 

“Tear him apart.” he responded, and she proceeded to do just that.

Saryn nodded, and turned to face the Stalker. Raising her Dual Cyskis, she slowly moved towards him. Suddenly, out of nowhere, Stalker raised War, swinging it in a wide arc. She ducked out of the way, rolling towards him, and slashed her blades across his torso. To any other enemy, the blow would have been serious, but he just shook it off and kept coming. 

She had to dodge again, as he slashed his blade sideways in a series of small swings, energy flying towards her. Then, she stood, and ran towards him, this time rolling around his back, and slashing upwards across his back. Again, there was no noticeable change in him, but she knew he must be hurting. She slid away again as he swung around, his sword just missing her by a split second. 

Saryn switched tactics, casting her Miasma on him. It didn’t go as well as she had hoped, as he seemed barely affected. And so, she resumed her dodging, rolling attacks, wearing down his health, slowly and steadily. Tyl watched from a corner, more concerned about her than amazed at her fighting ability. Although, he had to admit that she was doing a good job of it. 

After some time, Stalker’s health was within a sliver of depletion. Saryn, with a final move, spun in front of him, hooked one of her blades around his neck, and slashed his throat. He wailed, dissolved into shadows and disappeared. She trotted up to Tyl.

“I did it!” she said cheerfully. “See, no need to worry.”

“Yes, you most certainly did. I won’t doubt you again.” He wrapped an arm around her. “I’m glad that you’re okay.” 

“Well, we both knew I’d be fine, but...thank you for being concerned anyway.” she said, hugging him.

“Yes, well, the Stalker is a difficult enemy, from what I’ve heard Loki tell Kuda, so props to you for taking him down.” He returned her embrace, guilt pricking his insides.

She removed her helmet again, a big smile on her face, and he caught himself thinking about how pretty she looked when she smiled, which was rare even now, then mentally slapped himself.

The rest of the mission went off without a hitch, except for his conscience poking him with a needle every time she showed affection. The thing was, he did feel a measure of affection for her, but was it enough for a relationship? She was smart, she could fight…

He cut off the train of thought. It couldn’t happen, they didn’t even belong to the same faction. Sooner or later, he’d have to break the news to her.  _ Only when she’s well enough to take it, _ he told himself. 


	21. Holding on but Only Just

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saryn has a bad case of eye water

Tyl had finally given Fenrir the clearance to get up and walk around, and… pretty much nothing else. He couldn’t run. He couldn’t put his armor on. He couldn’t even breathe too deeply. All he could do, it seemed, was walk around, flexing his new hand, not even enough to work up a sweat. Still, it was better than nothing, count your blessings and all that.

And so, he was out stretching his legs for the first time in weeks, after Tyl had finally deemed him clear to be released from the room. While being stuck there had a few bright ponts (teaching Danya to cuss for example, even though she wasn’t picking it up as well as he’d hoped), he was more than happy with just this. So here he was, just wandering around, thinking. 

And then, he heard a sound, difficult to place at first. Following the hallway, around a couple of corners, he suddenly came upon the source of the noise. 

It was Saryn, bawling her eyes out. 

This was not normal bawling either. This was the straight-from-the-heart absolute gut wrenching sobbing. The holy-shit-my-life-is-falling-apart kind of crying, the kind you really only do if you’ve been bottling things for a long, long time. At first, he wasn’t sure if he should just walk up to her, or leave her alone. But then, she noticed him, only giving him a moment’s glance before turning away and crying into her hands. He walked up beside her, maintaining a respectful distance. 

“What’s wrong, Saryn?” he asked, quietly. 

She looked up, furiously wiping her eyes on her arm. “Nothing special.”

He reached out, gently patting her on the shoulder. “It’s okay, you can tell me.” 

“N-no, it’s nothing, really. Just...had a bad day, I guess. I mean, even today wasn’t that special. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, and Tyl’s busy so I didn’t want to burden him with this.” She dashed the back of a hand across her eyes again. 

“Just had it bottled up for a while, then?” Fenrir asked, nodding to himself. “It’s okay. You can’t be faulted for that, especially considering your history.” 

She sniffled a bit, looking up at him. “It all just kind of hit me at once; all the memories, regrets, everything I ever did wrong, all of it.”

“I could drag him out here if you want.” 

“Tyl? No, I don’t want to bother him. I know he’s busy, and he doesn’t need me taking up his time.” She looked down at the floor. 

“Ok, I’ve never been in a relationship, but I’m pretty sure that’s a common thing.”

“W-well, neither have I, until now. I don’t know all of what it entails, and I just really don’t want to bother him with my problems right now.” As she spoke, her voice got softer, almost trailing off. 

“Let him be the judge of that. Besides, it might do you good to see your significant other right now.”

“It’s fine, really. I don't get why you’re so nice to me, anyhow.”

He sat down next to her against the wall, resting his arms on his raised knees. “I don’t have a reason not to be, especially considering our last conversation. Besides, I’m only returning the favor. Not all Warframes would be willing to sit down and have a talk with me. In fact, I know that to be the case.” 

“Still, I feel like you should have been more hostile when we first met. Unless you were hopped up on painkillers or something.”

“I was, yes. Enough painkillers that my memory of some days is a bit fuzzy, especially at first. You didn’t have to come in and talk to me, or share food or water. But you did, and I appreciated the fact. Still do. Besides, I was tied down to the table, as I recall.” 

“Seems like a bit of a rocky foundation for a friendship.”

He laughed. “And an unlikely one, at that. However, in what little I’ve seen, I’m already fond of you, and I would like to be friends.” 

“That’s weird.” she said bluntly.

“Would you rather not?” he asked, feeling a bit crestfallen, but hiding it well.

“What, of course I want to! I just find it strange, especially to feel something so positive for someone like me.” She looked up at him again, her eyes dry. 

“Is that so unusual?” Fenrir was surprised. “Do you have no friends?” 

“Right now I have two friends that are Warframes, and one who is a Kuva Lich. Also Ordis, I think. If he counts. Not a very impressive list. I used to have no friends aside from Ordis, so make no mistake, this is a big step up for me.” She clasped her hands in front of her. 

He blinked, staying silent for a moment, letting his eyes wander aimlessly around the space. Finally, he answered. “Everyone needs a friend, Saryn.” 

“I guess they do.” she said quietly, her gaze returning to her lap.

They sat in comfortable silence for a time, simply enjoying being around one another. Or, he was, at least. Saryn looked like she still had more water in her. Still, she wasn’t objecting to his presence.  _ Although Saryn would probably deny it, _ Fenrir thought. Not that he could blame her, quite the opposite. He knew what it was like to not be able to trust anyone, looking at everyone with suspicion. No, he could not fault her, nor would he.

Eventually, it had to end, and he stood up, stretching carefully so as to not tear his stitches. “Thank you for letting me sit with you, but I must be moving on.” 

“It was nothing really. Just tell Tyl to come by when he’s not busy.”

He nodded. “Of course, I need to talk to him anyway.” 

She gave him a small, gentle smile. “Thanks.” 

“Anytime. If ever he isn’t available, I probably will be, if you need to talk sometime.” He gave her a smile back. She nodded, and he turned towards Tyl’s lab, waving goodbye over his shoulder.

Tyl was working on something, as usual, when he heard a knock at his door. Opening it, he was surprised to see Fenrir standing there. “Something must have gone wrong to bring you to my lab.” 

“Your pet project’s having a breakdown. Just thought you should know since you’re pretending to care about her and all that.” 

Tyl huffed. “I do care about her, just not exactly in that way. Where is she?” 

“Your friend without benefits is sobbing in a random storage room that way.” He pointed. “Well...not entirely true, you’re benefiting from the resources and specimens she brings you because she thinks you care.”

Tyl simply glared at him in response, as he put down what he’d been working on. “She  _ is  _ benefitting, or she will be.” 

“What do you mean by that?” Fenrir asked, suspicious.

“She’s going to be in a much better place mentally by the end of this, and I’ll be able to tell her the truth.”

Fenrir paused for a moment. “You really believe that, don’t you?” 

He sighed. “Look, I don’t need to explain myself to you. So how about you just drop it, and we can just focus on what matters?” 

Fenrir snorted. “So much for wanting to fix things, eh?”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m trying to better her, not tear her down.”

“And what makes you think you’ll be able to pull that off?” 

“What makes you think I can’t? How did you even find out about it?”

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe my personal experiences with you? As for how I found out...I’m not stupid, that’s how. It’s pretty obvious if you know what to look for.”

“Is it? Enlighten me then.”

“Firstly, you may not be loyal to the Queens, exactly, but you’re very loyal to your own people. That in itself would prevent you from truly ever forging a relationship with her. Second, you show her no affection, like at all. I’ve only seen you with her a handful of times, but even then, it’s pretty clear she’s the one instigating everything. It’s a bit impressive how blinded she is to it.”

“I’m not the type for massive PDAs, Fenrir.”

“Except with your Tubemen I assume?” he raised an eyebrow.

“That’s a completely different relationship!”

“You’re getting defensive about this. Rightfully so, since you’re lying straight to her face, but still.”

Tyl shook his head. “Look, you’ll understand later. I’m going to go find Saryn, and comfort her.” Inside, though, he was torn. He did want to better Saryn’s psychological situation, yes, but why was getting so defensive?  _ Something to think on later _ , he thought, as he brushed past him, and headed down the hallway. 

He spotted her sitting in the spot Fenrir said she was, back against the wall, sobbing into her hands. Quietly, he walked up, sitting down beside her. 

“T-tyl?” she looked up at him. Her eyes were bloodshot, breaking up the black of her scleras, and blurry with tears. She was weeping in such a bitter, desperate way it made her whole body shake. Her chest heaved as she coughed and choked on her own breath, the low light making the wet trails on her reddened face shimmer.

“What’s wrong, Saryn?” He reached out, putting an arm over her shoulders. 

She simply shook her head, and scooted closer to him, wrapping both arms around his torso. Tyl pulled her in close, brushing her hair away from her face. 

“I...I don’t really know to be honest. I mean, sure, today was a little worse than usual, but nothing out of the ordinary happened. Just bad luck. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

He patted her on the head. “Sounds to me like you’ve been bottling your emotions up for a while, and they’re just all coming out today.” 

“Just...today was fine, and then it wasn’t.” She hugged him tighter. 

Tyl was silent for a moment. “Is there anything I can do?” 

“Just stay with me, please. I don’t...I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts, and there’s nobody I’d rather be with than you. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

He nodded. “I can do that.” 

He pulled her into an embrace, and Saryn accepted without any hesitation, crying silently into his chest. She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. In truth, he wasn’t exactly sure what to do, except this.

Maybe this was all he needed to do, for the moment. 


	22. The Oldest Foe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is not what you think it is

Tyl had the baby Tubemen out again, caring for them. At first, Saryn didn’t want to be around while he was doing so, but they had quickly grown on her, and soon, she found herself helping him out, and being on the receiving end of their relentless, yet somehow adorable, squeaks.

“They love you Saryn. You’re the Tubeman Whisperer.” Kuda said saltity, watching them.

“I’m not sure about that,” she said, blushing. “I guess I do have a way with them, though, but it’s mostly because of Tyl. They see the way we act together and probably assume that means I’m fair game.”

“Fair enough. I wish I was that good with them.” 

“It’s a mixed blessing.” she said, above the din of chirps.

“How so? They’re just so cute, how can there be a downside?” Kuda asked, somewhat sarcastically.

Saryn shrugged. “Well, they have very grabby little hands and very sharp little claws. Also, this is really my first experience with children, if you could call them that. But they’re too cute and they make up for it.” 

“They sure do. If only they came near me like they do you.” She sighed dramatically.

“I’m sure they'll warm up to you eventually. You’ve just gotta take it slowly.”

“Maybe so. Anyway, I have places to be, so I’ll see you later. Security doesn’t take care of itself.” Kuda waved, walking out the door. 

“It’s about time to put them away, anyhow.” 

“Damn...fine. You know best after all.” she peeled them off of her and handed them to Tyl.

He put them back in their tubes, one by one, although it didn’t take as long as she expected. Soon, they were all floating peacefully. 

“I miss them already. It’s a shame that you have to put them back so soon.”

“Well, they can’t stay out for too long. They’ve got to keep growing..” He guided her out the door, shutting the lights off. “Besides, I don’t want some sort of disaster to happen while they’re out, so I try to limit their time outside of their tubes, at least while they’re this young.”

“That makes sense. Still,” she cautiously slipped her hand into his. “I wish I could interact more with them. Maybe later?” 

“I’ll be sure to let you know when I pull them out next time.” he said, trying not to stare at their joined hands like he had a giant infested on his.

Saryn was oblivious to this, just overjoyed he hadn’t pulled away. She wished he was a bit more affectionate, but this was good as well. She was happy to finally have someone to be affectionate towards.

What seemed like seconds later, they got back to the upper levels of Tyl’s lab, and Saryn reluctantly let his hand go. Tyl went over to his workbench, and she sat down on a crate near him, content to watch him work, gazing at him like a lovesick schoolgirl. 

All may have been well for Saryn, but that was not the case with Tyl. On the outside, he was as impassive as always. But his mind was a different story. He couldn’t get his previous conversation with Fenrir out of his head, for some reason, and he kept going over it, trying to figure out why. He was right, that he wasn’t showing her much, if any, affection, but how could he? It would be meaningless and fake, even if it did make her happy. Saryn, lonely and despairing as she was, was very easy to please, wanting nothing more than some positive attention and affection, content with as little as a brief squeeze of the hand, and was too blinded to really notice his behavior.  _ You’re just doing this to help fix her mind _ , he told himself. But he wasn’t convinced. Maybe he’d gotten himself into a bigger mess than he’d thought. He'd gone into this already wrestling with his feelings in the back of his mind and now? He wanted to strip off his armor, jump into the ocean and scream.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t do that. And so, he took a small comfort in the fact that Saryn genuinely cared about him, although it didn’t get rid of the conflict in his head. 

She bolted upright suddenly.

“Did you hear that?”

Tyl joined her. “Yes, I did.” 

Saryn’s voice was quiet. “I didn’t know sentients came here, at all.” 

“Oh they’re a somewhat regular nuisance, scanning things and occasionally stealing or killing my men. It’s quite annoying, but they’ll leave soon enough.”

“I’m gonna go take them out.” Saryn stood up, checking her weapons. “They shouldn’t be here.” 

Tyl walked over to her, grabbing her by her shoulders. “You don’t have to. It’s incredibly dangerous.”

Saryn smiled at him. “I was made to fight Sentients. All the Warframes were. This is my  _ job. _ ” She laughed, sweet and genuine. “I will be fine. Tell your men to get to safety.”

“Saryn, please. There’s no need to.” He held her shoulders, looking into her eyes. “Things will take care of themselves, you don’t need to risk your life just to protect what little they might harm.” 

“It’s not little to you, I think, despite what you say. It’s very cute that you’re trying to protect me like this, but I’ll be fine.”

Tyl sighed. “I’m not going to be able to talk you out of it, am I?” 

“Nope!” She kissed him on the mask.

“Good luck then, Saryn.” he said, guilt stabbing him. She smiled again and left, while Tyl sent out the order to hole up and wait.

Saryn set out to find the sentients. Normally, it would have taken hours, but this time that wasn’t the case. She walked around a corner, and there they were, the one of them scanning everything it saw while the other three hovered ominously. One Oculyst and three Battalysts. Not too bad. She pulled out her Cyskis and sighed, bracing herself.

Luckily, they hadn’t noticed her, yet, so she stepped around their backs, and attacked from behind, swinging both her blades at once, and making contact with the first of the sentients. Hooking them into the gap of its top, she sunk the blades into it and pulled with all she had, tearing it asunder. There was an ugly, crunchy ripping around as it was separated from itself. Her comrades tended to use more traditional methods to fight the Sentients, wasting time and energy hitting them and letting them shore up their defenses and adapt to their attacker’s strategy. Not her. Brutality worked best. It was a language they understood.

The Oculyst promptly phased out, and two more sentients appeared in its wake. Saryn huffed, and her blades flew, taking large chunks out of another one, while doing her best to dodge all the damage she could. And then, the next sentient was down, and she moved onto the third. She tore off it’s “arms”, and stabbed them into it until it stopped twitching, and spun around an attack from the others, rolling towards them.

The other two were taken down just as quickly, Saryn efficiently dispatching them. Soon enough, all that was left was a mess of sentient parts strewn across the floor, which Saryn gathered up and chucked into the unusually calm sea before going to report her success to Tyl.

“I’m back!” she said cheerfully. Tyl was talking quietly with a few squads, one or two looking a bit shaken up.

“Already? That didn’t take long at all, are you sure they’re gone?” he asked, sounding more nervous than she’d ever heard.

“Dead as rocks. It was easy, really. Check your camera footage if you want.”

“...Alright, I trust you. Was it really that easy?” 

“They tore like wet paper. It was pretty boring, actually.”

“Somehow I doubt that.” He walked up to her, wrapping both arms around her in a tight embrace. “I’m glad that you’re alright. You really didn’t have to do that.”

“Didn’t I? I disagree. If I’m with you now, that lumps this sealab, and everyone in it, in with the places and people I’m meant to protect.” She hugged him back, still smiling at him. Her comments stirred up some whispers among the gathered soldiers. 

“Well, thank you for caring, Angelfish.” Suddenly, he clamped his mouth shut, as he hadn’t intended to let that term slip out, and he felt a bit confused as to why it had.

Saryn didn’t notice his turmoil, as she was too busy blushing a vibrant shade of imperial red. Embarrassed, she put her face to his midsection to try to hide it, rather unsuccessfully. Tyl dismissed the soldiers, and turned his attention back to Saryn. 

“Did you not like that term?” he asked, rather playfully.

“N-no, I did like it! It’s just...unexpected is all. You’ve never called me anything like that before.”

“I’ll keep using it then, Angelfish.” He patted her on the head. She blushed deeper.

“I never expected something so sweet to come from you, honestly. You’re very...reserved.”

“I suppose so, but this is a special occasion,” he said, trying to ignore the mixture of feelings inside of him. 

“Special how?” she asked.

“Well, for one, you’ve defended the lab, but also, they’re the first sentients killed here.” He patted her on the back. 

“That’s not that special, really.” 

“It is for us. You’ve given us a solution to a problem we’ve had for a long time.” 

“Have I?”

“Well, as long as you’d be willing to kill more sentients.” Tyl laughed. 

“More than willing. These ones, at least, are pathetic. A shame the rest of them aren’t like that.”

“Alright, then. You’re the official sentient slayer.” He gave her another embrace. “You’ve helped more than you know.” 

“It’s really nothing.” She hugged him back. 

“Well, either way, it’s appreciated.” 

Much to his frustration, it seemed that this one interaction increased her affinity for him tenfold or more. Now, she went out of her way to spend time with him, strengthening that attachment even further. It was ridiculous. Even so, he never seemed to mind having her around, even on the rare occasions that she got annoying. He was getting used to her being near him, almost. He didn’t like it. He didn’t like how close she was getting, and how he almost seemed to be responding to it. But what could he tell her? Nothing, for now. He’d gotten himself into this mess, and for now, he’d have to stay here, until he’d helped her get to a better frame of mind, because the more days and weeks passed, the more he felt himself starting to truly reciprocate. That was dangerous. 

“Hey, Tyl, you busy?” Saryn asked one day, a few weeks after the Sentients came by. She’d performed her task a few more times since then, earning her the nickname “Sentient Slayer” from some of his men. A bit cliche, but Grineer grunts aren't known for creativity most of the time.

“Not at the moment, what’s on your mind?” 

“I was wondering if you’d like to go to Earth with me.” she asked shyly, hands clasped behind her back.

He looked up from the terminal he’d been reading. “Interesting question. May I ask for what reason?” 

“Just...y’know...like a date.” she blushed.

“Oh, that’s what you mean.” He paused for a moment, considering. “I do have some time at the moment, although I do have to be back by tomorrow morning. Is that enough time?”

“Yeah, sure. I just want to do something with you.”

“May I ask where this sudden urge came from?”

“Oh! Uh...well...ok this is going to sound really silly, but I see Oberon and Ivara doing it all the time, and I admit, I’m a bit jealous of them. They’re just...such a perfect couple, cause they’ve been together for so long and know each other nearly as well as they know themselves.” 

“Hm. I can spare the time, yes. When would you want to leave?” He didn’t mention that he was feeling unsettled about her motivations, as he wasn’t looking forward to feeling guilty the whole time. Then, he mentally shrugged.  _ A small price to pay if it helps her _ , he thought.

“Let’s go now, please!” She grinned widely at him. “I know just the place.”

Tyl nodded, patting her on the shoulder. “Let’s go, then.” 

She led him to one of Earth’s many forested landscapes, except this one looked diseased, or just...off. The leaves of the trees appeared purple, instead of the usual green, even though the rest of the plant looked perfectly healthy, with long, sweeping branches that hung down like hair, some nearly touching the ground.

“What are those?” he asked her.

“Wisteria trees in full bloom. It’s a wonder they haven’t been killed or ruined in some way.”

“Is that the reason I haven’t seen them anywhere else?” 

“I read somewhere that they used to be common in more places, but now they only grow here. It’s very secluded, far away from any Grineer or humans, and it’s in one of the low toxicity areas of Earth, one of the areas that’s actually healing quite quickly. That would probably be why.” she explained as she led him under the canopy of soft, pale, twilight purple flowers. “So...what do you think?” she asked, hesitantly.

“It’s beautiful.” He looked around, gazing at the sights, but for some reason, his eyes kept returning to Saryn. He found himself staring at her, and shook his head to clear it. What was he doing? 

She led him to a small glade and sat down, watching the loose petals slowly drift down, falling on her head and shoulders. She gestured to him to sit next to her, which he did, and she rested her head in his lap.

“You can’t begin to imagine how long I’ve wanted to bring you out here.”

Tyl stroked her hair, his feelings torn. “Thank you for bringing me, it’s very pretty.” 

“I’m very happy you like it. I was worried you wouldn’t be interested.”

Tyl simply patted her head in response, unsure of what to say. A comfortable silence stretched between them, the sounds of the forest around them. 

“So...how are things going with Fenrir?” she asked, sounding concerned.

He sighed. “Well enough. He wants to go back to...whatever he calls what he does, but he simply isn’t ready yet. He still needs to get used to his new hand, as well as give his body time to adapt to the new spine. These things take time, and he needs to realize that.” 

“That’s good. Is he warming up to you? At least a little bit?”

“He seems to be, but I can’t be sure. I hesitate to ask, for hopefully obvious reasons. To be fair, it could be that he’s just being civil until he gets the chance to leave. I don’t have a way to know.” 

“I hope things turn for the best with you two. I’ve come to quite like Fenrir, and it’d be a shame if he just left like that. I think you two can still make up, but someone has to dig the hole to bury the hatchet first, so to speak.”

“Yes, I understand that. I don’t know how he’d react to me trying, nor can I wrap my head around the fact that he got attached to you very quickly. Apparently you can be quite charming when you’re in a good mood.”

Saryn smiled, and turned over onto her back, so that she was looking up at Tyl. “I don’t know, but he seemed to be fine, in terms of how he acted, and what he said. If I didn’t know that there was bad blood between you two, I wouldn’t be able to tell. It’s a shame, you’re a lot alike. As for charming him, well...I wouldn’t say that. I just mothered him a bit, which in truth, he seemed to enjoy.” 

“It seems that you quite enjoy ‘mothering’ people,” he said, smiling down at her. “Is that something you want to end up being?” 

“It might have been, at one point.” she said, her face falling. “But it can’t be anymore.”

“Oh? Why’s that?” he asked. 

“Warframes are infertile, at least in some way. I thought this was common knowledge.”

“I suppose it makes sense. I’ve never heard of little baby frames running around, although I have heard of new frames. I just always assumed that they woke up from their cryosleep, or something similar.” 

“If we did have kids, they wouldn’t come out as Warframes, at least I don’t think so. But we can’t, unless the infertility is reversible, or our fertility is just dormant in some way and can be reawaked. I doubt it is. I’d never-” she stopped herself. “It’s just not likely. Trust me, if we could breed, someone would have done so by now. If I had to place bets, either Umbra and Garuda or Oberon and Ivara.”

“Fair enough. I am mildly intrigued, I must admit. Although, since Alad is on your side, faction wise, I’m sure he would’ve figured it out if it were possible. He’s a very competent man, if not as much as me, even though he is surprisingly smart. I would like to take a crack at it, however.” He stopped, considering the possibility. “I will likely never have the chance, though.” 

“I would be more than willing to let you, because even if Alad ever found a way to restore our fertility, I am the one frame he would never grant that blessing to.” She sighed. “N-not that I want it or anything. I’d probably be a terrible mother anyway. It’s for the best I can’t breed.”

“I’m honestly not sure how viable the option would be. I’ll have to get back to you, after I’ve thought it through. Besides, don’t sell yourself short. You might just be overthinking things, when they might be simpler than you perceive them to be.” He patted her head, brushing her hair out of her face. 

“I doubt it. You’re the only thing that’s gone right for me in months. Thank you for that.” 

Tyl simply kept brushing her hair in response. He wasn’t supposed to fall for her, and yet, here he was, alone with her in a forest, on a date. He knew that they couldn’t work, and yet...he didn’t want this to end, for some reason. He felt something when he was around her, though he couldn’t put his finger on what it was. She was just satisfying to be around, like she filled a space that he hadn’t noticed was empty. They continued to just sit and talk, letting the hours slip away, Tyl mentally slapping himself the whole while.

Saryn never detected any of his mixed emotions or torn feelings, she just didn’t want the day to end. Together, they watched the sunset, the sky turning from blue to crimson, to violet, then finally dark, before leaving, and returning to Titania. 

“Thank you Tyl. For...everything really.” She threw her arms around him.

He responded with a pat on her back. “You’re welcome. It was fun to get out, I haven’t done that in a while.” 

“Would you want to do it again someday?” 

“I’d love that.” 

She grinned, hugging him again. “I can’t wait! Let’s do it soon, alright?” 

“We’ll see. I’m not sure when I’ll be free next, but I’ll be sure to let you know.” It was only a half-truth, and Tyl knew it. Although he had enjoyed his time with her, the overarching guilt he had ruined the experience. He knew he’d have to face his feelings for her sooner or later, or things would only continue to rot.

“I love you, Tyl.”

He pulled her into a hug, too disgusted with himself to say it back.


	23. Dynamics and Dialogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Good things can come from Lua

For the next few weeks, all Tyl seemed to find himself doing was wrestling with his emotions, and it was driving him up a wall. Sure, he cared about Saryn, and he enjoyed the time they spent together, to a certain extent. But, his increasing guilt wouldn’t allow him to take full advantage of the situations, and so he could never be fully relaxed, as he might let something slip that would compromise the situation, and he was getting more and more tempted to refuse her everytime she asked him to come with her somewhere.

He’d never actually managed to say no, though. 

It puzzled him beyond reason. He couldn’t figure it out; one minute, he’d be convinced that he’d tell her he couldn’t, the next, they’d be on their way, and he’d be wondering what happened. Saryn never seemed to take advantage of him, in any way, as she seemed happy to just have someone to love. Tyl shook his head. He’d never make sense of it on his own. He needed to talk to someone about it, someone he knew well.

If only Saryn would find what she wanted on this damn mission.

She had managed to drag him on another mission to Lua, with the intention of showing him something that seemed to elude her. They’d been here a while now, looking around the various rooms, hallways, and decaying ruins, and she still hadn’t told him what it was. 

“Maybe it would help if you told me what you’re looking for.” he suggested.

“That would spoil the surprise,” she teased. “You’ll know when you see it, though. It’s not like anything you’ve ever heard of.” 

“Heard of?”

She smiled. “You’ll see.” 

He sighed but conceded, and they wandered the silent halls for ages, not even the Corrupted coming out to break it. Nothing did.

Until he heard the faint sound of music slowly chipping away at the quiet that had grown and clung like ivy.

“Yes, this is it!” she celebrated, darting under an arch flanked by two spinning lamps, encased in what looked like a net made of gold, their light a pale blue.

Tyl stared in wonder. “What is this?” 

“The Lua Music Puzzle.” 

Tyl was silent for a long moment. “All this is a puzzle?” 

She nodded, delighted. “Yes, it’s my favorite of all of the puzzles on Lua. It’s just nice to listen to, and besides, you can make your own music with it. Well...kind of, at least. It has eight set panels, and if you don’t complete the puzzle right away, you can just jump around and make them sing.” 

“Wouldn’t a shawzin be better?” he asked, still amazed. “I mean, what’s the whole point of this?” 

“I can’t play very well, and I don’t really have anyone who’d be willing to teach me. Besides, I think this sounds prettier than a shawzin.”

“I’d teach you if I knew. Anyway, is there something you get for completing it, or is it just here for the fun of it?” 

“There’s a forma involved occasionally, yeah. I come here and do them because I think they’re beautiful, and it helps me relax, honestly. I...probably should have asked if you’d even be interested. I’m sorry.” she stared at her feet.

“No, don’t worry. I’m merely confused, is all. It sounds like a fun challenge.” He put a hand on her shoulder. “How do we start it?” 

“Just hit the console here.” she said, pointing.

Doing so, he heard a set of musical notes ring out. “Do we have to copy the notes somehow?” 

She nodded. “You have to see which platform plays which note, and jump on them in the same order as they’re played.”   
  


“Alright, sounds like fun. But, from what you said, there’s also fun to be had by creating your own music?” he asked, curious.

“I’m the only one who really does it, as far as I know, and there aren’t many notes to work with. Still...I enjoy it nonetheless, even if it is rather stupid.” 

“Would you rather do that, or just solve the puzzle?” 

“I...well I could do that, or we could just solve it and leave, if you’d rather do that.”

Tyl knew which she’d rather do, but asked anyway. “What’s your preference?” 

“I’d like to try to make music with you. I mean, only if you want to. I understand if you’d rather just get out of here.” She looked down. 

“Alright. You tell me where you want me, and I’ll follow your lead.” He gave her a pat on the head.

She looked up at him, smiling. “Aw, thanks! Just go stand on that platform, I’ll take care of the rest.” 

Once everything was set up, Tyl and Saryn spent quite some time coming up with melodies, Saryn even going so far as to record a couple of them. She sang along with a sweet, clear voice, and was pleasantly surprised at how willing he’d been to do this nonsense with her.

Eventually, though, they got around to solving it, as she proudly showed off for him. He was more than happy to let her solve it, not because he’d had enough, but she was having fun, and wasn’t in her own head. They grabbed the forma from the side room, and exited, Saryn bubbling over with excitement the whole way back to Uranus. 

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! I’ve never been able to show that to someone without getting looked at funny. That was...really lovely.” she said, smiling uncontrollably. 

“I enjoyed it, too. That might be the only tolerable thing on the whole of Lua.” He smiled back at her. 

“You’re probably right, it’s definitely the only reason I would choose to go there. It’s just so nice, though.” She walked up to him, tenderly hugging his midsection. Tyl returned the embrace, surprised that he’d enjoyed himself as much as he had. 

Then, as he thought back through the mission, he noticed something. He hadn’t been plagued by the massive throes of guilt that seemed to follow him around, when Saryn was involved. He’d simply enjoyed the time with her. What had happened? More confused than ever, he decided to find someone to ask about it. The question was who. Who could he go to about this kind of relationship with a Warframe?

He sighed, feeling like an idiot. Dakik. Of course.

He wasn’t sure, but since he had gone official with Kelpie, maybe he knew something. It couldn’t hurt to ask. Could it?

Rather than dwell on what might go wrong, he dismissed himself from Saryn, and went to find him. After a few minutes, he spotted him in the mess hall, next to Danya and Kuldain. 

“Hey Boss.” Kuldain tilted his head at him.

“Dagh, you’re back!” Danya ran up to him, throwing her arms around his waist. 

“Yes, I’m back. Seems like you missed me,” he said, crouching down so they were face-to-face. 

“I did. Though it wasn’t as long as when you went to Earth the last time.” 

“Well, I’m here. Although I’d love to stay, I need to speak to Dakik alone, if that’s okay.” 

“Wha-? Oh...fine.” She pouted. “Great, first you spend all your time with Saryn so I’m stuck with Dakik, and now I don’t even get Dakik. Stupid Warframe.”

“Don’t worry, you’ll get me all to yourself after this. I promise.” He patted her on the head, and she seemed to cheer up somewhat.

Dakik stood, excusing himself from the table, and followed Tyl back to his lab. “What do you need, Dagh?” 

“I’d like to ask you something. It’s a bit strange, so please bear with me.” 

“Of course, what is it?” He sat down on a crate, hands on his knees.

Tyl took a deep breath. “Well...it’s about my relationship with Saryn. I accepted her offer with the intention of trying to repair her mental state, then getting out of the relationship when she was stable enough to take the rejection. I’m almost constantly plagued by feelings of guilt. I know that I’m leading her on, and I accepted that as part of the deal. But, the thing is, I keep having...moments, in which I catch myself staring at her, or thinking back on moments we’ve shared, almost like I’m treasuring the memory. My emotions are torn, and I suppose that I’m just trying to make some sort of sense of what I’m feeling.” 

“And I suppose you asked me because of Kelpie, right?”

He nodded. “It made sense, as you have experience being in a relationship with a Warframe.” 

“You like Saryn, don’t you Dagh?”

“Well, she’s nice to be around, but not-” 

“No, I mean you  _ like _ her. Based on what you said, it sounds like you're torn because you actually have feelings for Saryn, but your mission of trying to fix her is getting in the way. Or maybe it’s masking it.” 

Tyl went to reply, then stopped. When he thought about it that way, it made perfect sense. “So, what you’re saying is that I actually love her, but haven’t admitted it to myself, correct?” 

Dakik nodded. 

He sighed. “Well, that definitely throws a wrench into things.” 

“How? Forgive me, but I thought this would be a good thing.”

“I cannot act as an impartial touchstone if I have feelings for her.” He sat down.

“You don’t need to be impartial, not by a long shot. You obviously love her, or you wouldn’t be here talking about it. The thing is, do you want to love her?” 

“What do you mean by that?”

“When you think about it, about Saryn, do you find yourself wanting to be around her, talk to her, et cetera? Or do you want to get away from her as soon as possible?” 

“I...I want to be around her. I think.” Tyl leaned forward, looking at the floor. “I tend to enjoy my time around her. The only bad memories I have with her are the ones I feel guilty in.” 

“Well, all that’s left for you to do, then, is admit to yourself that it’s alright to love a Warframe. I had to do it, so it’s not strange to have to go through.” Dakik reached out, setting his hand on Tyl’s shoulder. “Trust me, it’s worth it. Even if you won’t admit it, I’ve seen how lonely you get. You just mope around, trying to busy yourself with projects. I haven’t seen it when you’re with Saryn, though.” He shrugged. “Just something I’ve noticed.” 

After a long moment, Tyl nodded. “I think you’re right. Thank you.”

Dakik hugged him tightly, and Tyl reciprocated, a weight off his shoulders.

He just had one last thing to do. 


	24. Clair De Lune

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The moment you've all been waiting for.
> 
> Special thanks to III for his advice and help.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTfeMhyyy5o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clair de lune means moonlight in French :3

Fenrir was standing on the outer platform, watching the ocean. Today was a particularly windy day, and the sky was overcast, turning the sea frothy and angry, well suited to his mood. His mind dwelt on Tyl, and his relationship with Saryn. Even though he hadn’t been here long, he had seen that his father had indeed changed his ways, and things were looking up. But now, he’d lost all respect for him once again, with his willingness to lie straight to Saryn’s face, with seemingly no second thoughts. Maybe there was still a bit of the old Tyl in there, just buried too deep to ever get out. There was still a small part of him that hoped it wasn’t the case.

The sound of footsteps shook him from his reverie, and he turned around to see Saryn walking towards him. She smiled and waved as she approached, and Fenrir couldn’t help but smile back, though it was quickly doused out by his thoughts. 

“Hello Fen. You look a bit cloudy today. Something up?”

“No, not really. Just kind of in my own head,” he said, trying to appear as if nothing was on his mind. 

“I see. I know what that’s like.” she said, patting him on the head, ruffling his hair.

“Better than most, that’s for sure.” Try as he might, he couldn’t keep himself from smiling from her gesture.

“You’re nice, but I’m nothing special. I honestly can’t figure out what your Dagh sees in me.” 

“Well, you’re really nice, and just overall a lovely and considerate person. Even if you don’t see it.” He gave her a pat on the shoulder. She blushed.

“I’m not _all_ that.”

“Yes you are, even if Tyl doesn’t want all of it.” Then, realizing what he’d said, he quickly shut his mouth, silently berating himself.

“W-what?” she asked, eyes wide. “What do you mean by that?”

He sighed heavily. “Look, I wasn’t supposed to say anything. But, seeing as how it’s out now, I might as well finish. Regor’s only with you because he’s trying to repair your mind, get you to a healthier place, then end the relationship once he thinks you can take it.” 

A nail had just been swiftly struck into her heart, and even if she wasn’t bleeding out, it wasn’t necessary, her pain could almost irradiate through the entire place and be cast upon any others that came in contact with it. Discomfort, second-hand for the most part, managed to fill the scene and thicken the air, just as her lower lip started shaking in her utter disbelief as she took one single step back that could have easily been heard across the entire planet. Fenrir didn’t just stand there either, the hammer he used to bring despair to Saryn came back to him with just as much strength, filling him with regret before his mind could even start processing what he just did. He could practically hear her heart tearing in half and shattering. 

“T-that can’t be true.” she rounded on him, bracing herself without even noticing. “Tell me it isn’t true!”

After a moment, one single moment that almost felt eternal to Fenrir as the realization finally reached him to match his rising horror, he nodded. “I-I swear it is. Y-you can ask h-him... if you like...” He stopped, ashamed of himself, of Tyl. “I’m sorry, you weren’t supposed to know. Maybe he had you in mind, but I don’t know.” 

“I thought...I thought that....” she couldn’t finish her sentence, choking on her words. She dropped to her knees with all the weight of a bird shot with an arrow, banging them hard enough that it was a wonder her armor didn’t crack. The same could be said for her arms, which were gripped in a grip as tight as eagle’s talons, any tightly and her sword-steel skin would shatter, exposing the raw red muscle beneath. Asphyxia could have been a quick, effective relief from her misery, now brought to a whole new level in a single instant, had it been real, and not just a product of her distress peaking, as her pale cheeks receive the fruit of her horror in the form of her clear, painful tears slowly making their descent. But no, she couldn’t even get that, _you couldn’t even die there and then, but what did you expect? Come on, admit it to yourself, what did you really expect for yourself? Did you ever deserve anything good? Did you really, for at least a single instant of your pathetic existence, expect to be loved by your oh so cherished dashing Tyl Regor in his mighty armor and his oozing charisma, when you don’t even deserve your eyes to be met by the most putrid of Infested?_

He didn’t have anything more to say, speechlessly watching her slowly succumb to her new source of madness, and although the truth had finally come out, he desperately wished that he’d kept his mouth shut. _You’ve broken her, she’ll never be the same again. This is your fault_.

Saryn’s pain kept rising further and further up at an alarming rate, until, just like a rollercoaster, it came down with astounding velocity, as a new peace of mind came to her, not with another laughable justification to herself, but with acceptance, a kind of acceptance she could only muster up for the hardest things when she finally admitted defeat. Tears were still bringing an eerily breathtaking shine to her face, but her frown was gone, and the only thing left was nothing, just a blank stare, and the barest hint of a smile. 

“T-thank you f-for... telling me, Fenrir. Don’t… don’t blame yourself for anything, please.” she wiped her eyes fruitlessly, her voice choked and quiet.

“I’m sorry...” He was surprised as he felt her arms around him, just after witnessing her falling into a new kind of desperation he had never seen before. “What’s that for?” 

“W-well...this is goodbye, I guess.” She looked up at him. “I probably won’t be coming back... and I’ll miss you.”

If he was already regretting his actions before hearing these words, having to listen to her announcing her farewell to him almost made him prefer he was pummeled unconscious into the ground before his stupid mouth had to spew out all that venom. He could feel her arms shaking uncontrollably around his waist, not because of the cold, but thanks to him and the fruit of his idiocy at their best.

After a moment, he returned her embrace, feeling more guilty than he ever had. “I’ll miss you too, you… you don’t have to leave if you don’t want to.” She shook her head, most of her pain already hidden under a thin, fragile layer of false apathy. “It… it’s alright. Be good, please. I’d hate for you to run afoul of my colleagues.” 

“I will, don’t worry.” He began thinking about what he’d say to Tyl, quite the mighty piece of self-inflicted intrigue considering he didn’t even know how to assimilate what he just did, and if he himself couldn’t accept it, there was no way he could endure watching Tyl’s reaction. 

Saryn sighed. “Well...I’m off, then. Thanks for everything.” her tears flowed freely as she pet him on more time.

Part of him wanted to grab her tight by the wrist and keep her right in place, at least to tell her he just lied to her, and it was all his fault, but he could never bring himself to do such a thing, he didn’t want to go down to Tyl’s level, he wouldn’t have been any better than him, when he just… wanted the best for her.

He wanted to punch himself, if the pain that caused would measure up to what he’d unleashed on her, like a starving wolf on a rabbit, and take everything back. Saryn...how could he? Even if it was the right thing to do, even if he was sparing her future pain...she’d been so kind to him, how could he repay her with this? 

Saryn nodded, and stood up, shakily, like she was half-rotted and pulling herself out of a coffin, scrubbing her eyes fruitlessly. 

Fenrir watched her leave, then turned and booked it, for the first time in years, to find Tyl with an intent other than murder.

“Tyl! You second rate lab technician, where are you?!” he yowled, rounding a corner and nearly sliding into a wall.

“Quit running like a drunken Corpus roboticist, you’ll pull out all your stitches and ruin my work.” Tyl hissed, watching Fenrir’s near miss. “I know you don’t care about that, per say, but I’d think you’d take a little more caution as to not tear yourself apart again.”

“I have more important things to worry about right now! I fucked up big and now Saryn might be about to do something incredibly stupid.”

That pulled him up short. “What, what did you do? What’s going on?” He walked up, grabbing him by the shoulders, nervous. “Come on, tell me!”

“I told Saryn how you’ve been leading her on, and everything. I thought it was the right thing to do, but now…” He shrugged, the motion communicating just how useless the words felt. “She was bawling her eyes out when she left. You might want to do something,” he added quietly. “Or it’ll be her blood on your hands. You’re the one who started this whole damn charade. Why, I don’t know, probably for some selfish scientific end, ‘cause you can’t take off your goggles for five goddamn seconds and look at the consequences, but right now she needs you, probably more than you’ll ever need her, so go take some fucking responsibility.” he snarled.

Tyl released his grip, and took a step back, stricken. “You...you told her that? You never thought to ask me first, that maybe you could be wrong?” He turned away, head in his hands. Then, all of a sudden, he rounded back on him. “Of course you didn’t! Why would you, after all this time? Even if you did have some measure of respect for me, you’ve always been too impulsive for your own good!” 

“Wrong?” Fenrir had his head cocked to one side. “What do you mean? Don’t tell me you actually care for her...do you?” he asked, it slowly dawning on him that maybe his Dagh was right.

“Of course I do! Do you think I’d have gotten this angry if I didn’t?!” He went to say more, then stopped, the air seeming to go out of him. After a moment, he spoke, his voice quiet. “Do you know where I can find her?” 

Slowly, Fenrir shook his head, feeling absolutely pitiful. The kuakas that had plagued Saturn Six could carry themselves higher than he could. 

Tyl looked at him for a moment, then sighed, resignation beating its hammer into him. “Of course not, it’s never that easy. I’ll just have to hope to annoy her enough to answer a message.” He clenched a fist, and they both heard his unspoken words. _If she’s still around to get one._ The thought of losing her, in this or any other way, after finally being able to come to terms with how he felt made him sick. It would be a cruel joke indeed, the two of them getting this close only for her to be gone in a whirl of orchid petals. She deserved better.

Saryn was lying on the floor of her orbiter, head buried in her arms, crying as hard as she could manage. It wasn’t that she felt betrayed, exactly. It was the fact that Tyl had cared about her enough to do something like this, but he didn’t like her enough to love her. That’s what hurt.

_I am completely unlovable. I should have known. Why did I get my hopes up? Whenever I’m happy, it gets snatched away. It always gets ripped out of my arms as soon as I hold it. Alright, fine. I’ll never be happy, or loved, or wanted. I can live with that. I can live with being alone. I have before. Not much will really change._

Just then, she got a communications beep. _Tyl? What the hell does he want now?_ She rejected it, huffing. Whatever he had to say, she didn’t want to hear it. She went back to her dark pit of despair. 

Tyl ground his teeth when his call failed to go through, determined to keep trying, though maybe a new strategy was in order. 

Saryn started as she got the beep again. _Tyl, again?_ It’d only been an hour, what was he thinking? The next hour, it happened again. And the next. The process continued, on the hour, every hour. At first, it wasn’t so bad, but as time went on, it got annoying. She resolved to not crack under the pressure. She thought about leaving, but there really wasn’t anywhere she could go to avoid both him and her comrades, so she stayed, waiting for him between bouts of tears.

All told, she lasted two days. Eventually, it became too much, and she picked up just to make him stop calling. That was her intention, at least. 

“What the hell do you want?” she said, sounding angry but dull at the same time. She looked rough, her silky white hair a complete mess, her eyes bloodshot, her face reddened and painted with salt from her dried tears. “Haven’t you caused me enough pain?”

“Saryn, I need to talk to you. I know it looks bad, but just listen, please.” he implored.

“...Fine.” She crossed her arms. “I’m waiting.” 

“Would you be willing to come back here? This needs to be said in person.”

She shook her head. “I’m not going back.” 

He heaved a sigh. “Fine. Fenrir was wrong, about what he told you.”

“Fenrir...what? What do you mean? What, you weren’t even doing it to help me then?”

“No! He wasn’t wrong about that, he was wrong when he said I’m _only_ with you to help you.” 

Saryn was stricken. “So...w-what are you saying?” 

He sighed. “I’m saying that I love you, Saryn. I’ve been wrestling with the emotion for a while, and at first, I didn’t realize it. Dakik helped me understand what was going on in my head, and I’ve stopped fighting it. I love you.”

Saryn was completely lost for words. He loved her? But what about what Fenrir had said? After some thought, she answered. “So...if I agree to come back, are you still going to leave me when you think my mental state is ready?” 

“No. I’m not going to leave you, Angelfish. Ever.” he vowed, watching her start to tear up again.

“I’ll be there soon.” she whispered, ending the call.

Not long later, she was standing on the same platform she’d spoken with Fenrir on. Tyl was waiting for her, and she ran to him, jumping into his arms.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry, so sorry for being such an _idiot_.” she sobbed, her head resting in the crook of his neck as he held her up. 

“No, it was me. I shouldn’t have led you on like I did. I’m the one who should apologize. I’m sorry.” He embraced her, glad to have her back. He brushed a few locks of hair out of her face when she faced him finally.

“You...really meant it, right?”

“Every word, I promise. Never doubt it.”

Saryn nodded, wiping her eyes. “I love you, Tyl.”

Instead of replying, he pushed up his mask a bit with his thumb and kissed her. Saryn was so surprised she didn’t know what to do at first, but after a moment, she reciprocated. Too soon, it ended, and she heard Tyl say those words.

“I love you, too, Saryn.” 

Her heart melted, and she thought that maybe, just maybe, things would be okay. She knew that Tyl loved her, it was certain. Maybe that was all she needed. She pressed her lips to his again. For the first time, she felt that it was possible for everything to take care of itself, in the end. The future suddenly didn’t look so bleak. 

The two sat together, Saryn on Tyl’s lap, watching the night sky.

“It’s too far away to see Lua now.” she said quietly. “And Lua doesn’t shine as brightly as it used to, thanks to the Orokin.”

“I like looking at Uranus’s own moons better, anyway. Moonlight is moonlight after all.” He put an arm around her, pulling her close. “When it’s not too cloudy, anyway.”

“You know, humans say it’s romantic. Moonlight, I mean.” She snuggled into him.

“Well, they might be right. Would you like to find out?” He gave her a sidelong look, curious.

She looked back, and nodded. “Yes, that would be nice. How would you do that?” 

“I was just thinking we come out here every night, and wait to see if the sky will show off her jewels. Or, we could go to Earth, watch the sunset, and wait for it there.” 

“I’m alright with either, as long I get to spend time with you.” She looked up at him, smiling.

He smiled back, and they settled into each other, partly watching and waiting, but underneath, just happy to have each other's company.

“I have a question for you, Tyl.” 

“Hm?” He’d begun to doze off, Saryn’s words rousing him. “Of course, what is it?” 

“Someday...may I see your face?”

Tyl thought for a moment. “That would be fair, I suppose.” He went silent, considering. “I’ll think about it.” 

“That’s enough for now. Thank you.” she smiled up at him.

He patted her head, content. She rested her hand on top of his, both of them oblivious to the passing of time. 


	25. What Lies Beneath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Secrets meant only for Tyl's ears.

For the next few weeks, Saryn was happier than she could ever remember being in the past. Things seemed brighter, as the days passed, and she almost felt...satisfied. Was it alright to be this happy? Or was there something wrong? She pushed down the little thorns of doubt, wanting nothing to stain her time with Tyl.

Someone was already planning to do that anyway.

Mag couldn’t believe her luck at having caught them snogging on tape, and, while she didn’t want to push her luck, was seeing if she could get just a little more to drive the nail in the coffin. This was her revenge for all Saryn had done to her, and she was going to make sure it hurt like a bitch.

So here she was, watching the two of them watch Uranus’s nightfall, the sky booking remarkably like one of Earth’s sunsets, and listening for secrets.

Saryn and Tyl were sitting together, his arm over her shoulders, her head tucked into him. For the most part, they weren’t talking all that much, just being together. 

“You’ve got no idea how much of a blessing you are to me, Tyl.”

“I feel like I have an idea, but feel free to enlighten me.” He brushed a few errant strands of hair from her face. 

“Don’t tell a soul, alright?’ She gave him a serious look. 

“I won’t, I swear.” 

“The truth is...well...I’m scared, scared of being alone. You have no idea what it was like before I had you...I had almost nobody. My ties to the Tenno all felt very flimsy, and I dread the thought of having to toil for years to earn my forgiveness. That’s part of why I’m so happy to have you. I’m not alone anymore. I don’t feel as slimy and disgusting. I feel like, maybe I’m worth forgiving, that I really can try again. It’s been so long since I felt any kind of joy or love. Thank you so much, thank you for being able to love me, because nobody else can, and I sure can’t.”

Tyl didn’t answer at first, simply giving her a squeeze as he thought about what she’d said. After some time, he finally replied, his voice soft. “That’s a lot to go through, Saryn. I’m glad you’re here with me. If I’m being honest, I never realized how lonely I was until you were a part of my life.” 

“You? Lonely? I must confess, I never really thought of that, especially since you have your Tubemen, and all that.”

“I mean in the sense of a companion. That’s something I’ve never really had, and I never thought about it, until you asked me.” 

“I see...in that case, I’m happy to be there for you, like you are for me. I don’t even know how to express it properly. You make it possible for me to lock away even my blackest thoughts. To just not think them, to forget they exist. That’s a true blessing, and a relief. To not think the things I've had in my head for so long they’ve worn grooves...it’s like magic almost.”

Tyl patted her on the shoulder. “I’m happy to do that for you.” 

They fell into a comfortable silence for a while, before Tyl spoke up.

“What are these thoughts, may I ask? Is it your memories of your nightmares?”

“Some of them, yes. Others are worse.”

“Would you mind sharing them? Maybe it might be better to let them come out, rather than keeping them inside and letting them fester.” 

Saryn thought for a bit. “Maybe. These aren’t exactly happy in any sense, though, they’re quite the opposite. So maybe they’ll hurt just as much talking about as thinking of.” 

“Possibly, but I’d still like to know. I’m concerned now.”

She cleared her throat. “W-well…” Then she stopped, unsure where to start. 

“It’s okay, just when you’re ready,” Tyl said, after a moment.

"Do you remember when I told you about the conversation I had with Nidus?"

“Yes, I recall. What of it?” 

"Do you remember the one question of his I refused to answer?"

“His question of why? Yes.” 

“The answer to that question. That’s what it is.”

“That answer is not pleasant, I assume?”

“It’s not, but I’ll tell you anyway.” She took a deep breath, steeling her nerves. “There are two reasons why I want to change. The first is rather obvious. I despise myself. I am disgusted with my existence, and what I’ve become over time, especially after seeing the Moth in my dreams, and what I’ve done to her...what I’ve done to Kelpie, Mag, everyone. I cannot, in good faith, like myself, not until I manage to fix myself.”

“I see.” Tyl patted her on the back. “And you didn’t want Nidus, or anyone else, knowing these things, as they might prey to those weaknesses?” 

“Possibly, but more so I find it humiliating to admit. It’s a selfish reason to change, but I don’t want to hate myself anymore. It’s so tiring. I want to be happy again.”

“I would disagree on it being a selfish reason. You want to change because you realize you were a bad person, and you no longer wish to be like that.”

“I guess.”

“Your second reason?” he prompted gently.

“I…” She choked, standing up and walking over to the railing. She took a deep breath forcing her words out. “I feel that the only way I can truly redeem myself is by dying.”

Tyl froze, his eyes widening under his mask. “W-what?” he said, the only thing he could manage to spit out after forcing his tongue to work.

“I have to die. To truly cover all of my wrongdoings, I have to pay with my life. When I realized it...at first, I was opposed to the idea, horrified by it...but now, as time has passed, I’ve...I’ve come to almost welcome it. I’m ok with dying for this, Tyl. I want to die.” she looked back at him, barely held back tears falling down her face.

After a moment, Tyl pulled her into an embrace. “Please don’t, Saryn. I just got you back, and I can’t have you taken away. Not now. We’ll figure something out, I promise.”

“I don’t know if there’s anything you can do about this...it seems like it’s fate. Maybe I’ll end up like Xaku one day, splattered on the floor of an Orokin hall. No matter.” She bashed her head against his armored chest, starting to cry in earnest, ugly, gasping sobs that took her breath for a few moments. “Tyl, please, help me!” She wrapped her arms around his torso and squeezed as tightly as she could, clinging to him like he was the only stable thing left in the system. “Please…”

Tyl said nothing, just lifted her up and held her close, her head resting under his chin. He sat back down, stroking her back, kissing her forehead, and whispering sweet nothings to her like she was just a startled little bird while she broke down in his arms.

“I won’t abandon you, Angelfish. I’ll stay with you, even when nobody else will. I’ll be here. I love you, and I always will, Saryn. I don’t want to lose you. Please, please promise me you’ll never do anything stupid to yourself.” 

She sniffled, taking a few deep breaths. “I-I promise, Tyl. I love you, too.” 

Tyl held her close, looking her in the eye. “Whenever you feel that way, I want you to come talk to me, alright? Anytime, I’ll be available.”

Saryn nodded, leaning into him. 

“If you need to vent, or say anything else right now, please do. Don’t let it rot, it will only serve to hurt you further, and I don’t want that.”

Not trusting herself to speak, she nodded again, taking a few more deep breaths. After a moment, she spoke. “I-I just...don’t leave me alone, n-not right now, please…” 

“I won’t. I’m here, don’t worry.”

She simply embraced him again, her breathing rough. 

“I’d like to ask you something.”

“S-sure?” she said, molded against him.

“If you were thrown into the ocean right now, what would you do?”

“I’d...I’d try and get out.”

“Would you now? There you go. If you were drowning right now, you’d see yourself fighting to survive. It’s not that you want to kill yourself, rather, you want to kill something inside of you.”

“I guess so,” Saryn said quietly, looking away from him. 

Tyl leaned into her, planting a kiss atop her head. “You can do it, Saryn. I know you can.” 

“I wish I could believe that of myself as much as you do.” She let out a sigh, feeling crushed by a massive weight on her shoulders. 

He pulled her close, and whispered in her ear. “I’ll believe enough for both of us.” 

She simply bobbed her head and rested it back down against his chest, watching her tears fall on his armor.

“You don’t think I deserve to die, do you?”

“No, of course not.” He put a finger under her chin, raising her gaze to meet his. “How could I think that, when I just got you back?” 

She lowered her head again, blushing slightly. “I-I’m sorry. I guess...I feel unworthy of all your love and kindness, even though I couldn’t be happier to have it.”

He gave her another kiss. “Even if you don’t think so, I’m going to keep doing it.”

“Please do.” She nuzzled back into his chest, sighing contentedly.

Mag was practically beside herself with malicious joy. While Saryn continued to spill her guts out to Tyl Regor, she made sure to capture every word, every sentence of her beautifully crafted self loathing. It was perfect, too perfect. While she would show their comrades her and the Grineer, she’d keep these pieces to herself, and use them to break Saryn permanently. For all she’d done, all the time Mag had wasted on her, alone, wondering why all her colleagues felt like strangers, being at her constant beck and call...now, Saryn would get a taste of her own medicine, and her downfall would be a glorious work of art, a testament to her evil, blackened heart, because no matter how much she tried to change, Mag was determined to never believe it, and to make sure the others never bought it.

After all, she deserved it. Didn’t she?

Back on the platform, both Saryn and Tyl were unaware they had been watched, and were simply enjoying the sunset together, arm in arm. The evening was peaceful, and Saryn’s mind had been mostly put to rest, leaving plenty of room for her to be happy to just be with him. Even if the rest of her life crashed down, as long as she had him, she’d make it through.


	26. Only a Shadow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth is spilled on the floor.

Saryn truly couldn’t remember the last time she’d been this happy. After all, she had a loving partner, she had friends, and she had all the baby Tubemen she could handle. She flourished in this environment, her mental state improving by the day, as was her outlook on life. She grew to be more outgoing, to a point where it even surprised her, and she deemed herself well enough to maybe take a little walk around a relay.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Tyl asked, raising an eyebrow.

“What harm could it do that they haven’t already done?” she asked, flippant. “So little changes there day to day, I’m willing to bet that it’ll be almost exactly the same as when I left. Besides, I should probably go back one in a while, just to keep up appearances.” She looked up at him, smiling. “You know, I would give you a kiss goodbye, but you’re all the way up there.” 

He sighed and lifted her up. “If things go badly, come back straight away, please.”

“I promise.” She pecked him on his mask, and wrapped her arms around his neck before he put her down. “I love you.” 

“Love you, too. Come back safe.” Tyl watched her wave over her shoulder as she headed out the door, and the thought occurred to him that maybe he could watch her leave the port from the outer platform. He’d have to hurry, though. 

Five minutes later, he stood outside, watching Saryn’s ship shrink in the clear vastness of sky that blanketed Uranus. Once it disappeared, he sighed without knowing it, and turned back, walking slower than he normally would. The Sealab would be a very different place without her around.

Saryn wandered around Larunda for a bit, trying to keep her knees from shaking. She might be in a better place mentally, sure, but that didn’t stop this experience from being utterly terrifying. Her insides were tying themselves into tangles so intricate they might as well have been knotwork, and she felt something unpleasant and sharp tasting trying to climb up her throat. She swallowed hard, trying to tamp everything down. Things would be  _ fine. _

So far, nobody had even turned to look at her. So far, so good. She picked a spot near the entrance, and took a seat, far enough away that she wouldn’t be noticed, but close enough to listen in on conversations. She watched the relay intently, looking and listening for anything that might be out of place, something that might indicate she needed to make a quick exit. 

After some time, her gaze was grabbed by a certain frame calling attention to herself. She looked up to see Mag strutting around like a used car salesman, beckoning everyone over and seeming smug to an outrageously annoying level. Saryn felt herself growing more skittish, but she didn’t know why. At least, not until she started talking about what she was doing. 

“What do you want?” asked Harrow from the gathered crowd, eyeing her.

She gave him a smug look. “I have some ah, let’s say,  _ interesting _ information that I’ve unearthed, and it needs to be shared. Urgently.”

“Go ahead, then, instead of having us all stand here waiting.” Umbra spoke up, motioning with a hand. “Don’t string us along like it’s some grand announcement.”

She cocked her head at him. “That’s exactly what it is.” With a few deft motions, she pulled up the footage she had captured, letting it tell the story. 

Saryn watched, and felt her blood run cold. It was her shared kiss with Tyl, and the whole conversation before and after, the most private, tender moment she’d had with him, and here it was, out in the open. There was a collective gasp, then complete silence as it played. This was her putting aside her despair for one single moment and letting hope take root and grow, letting herself be vulnerable to someone for the first time in what might be years, counting her time as the Witch, and here Mag was, making a circus out of it. She felt like someone was peeling off her armor and rubbing salt on the raw, exposed muscle. Like someone had pried open her ribcage and punched her straight in her beating heart. 

Every part of her was screaming at her to run, run and never, ever, never in a million years come back, but the one masochistic part of herself made her stay and watch. Maybe she deserved it, being exposed like this. She tried not to call attention to herself, trying to make herself as small as possible, but it didn’t work. She was already getting stares, and there were plenty of frames mumbling to each other. She tried not to watch, tried to look away, but couldn’t. She had to see it through. It was like a ship accident: no matter how horrible it is, one can’t turn away. 

She sat through the whole thing, enduring the various looks and whispers. At the end, Mag simply closed the video and watched the chaos spread. If she wasn’t in a state of shock, Saryn would have left the relay far behind her. But, with having witnessed what she had, she was simply stunned beyond words, unable to process what had just taken place. 

She looked down at the floor, and with a heavy heart, resigned herself to the inevitable questioning that would take place. It always did, and as much as she wished it wouldn’t happen, hoping for that would be like hoping that the sun wouldn’t rise the next day. 

Suddenly, she heard a voice. A loud voice, and it sounded like it was yelling. “What the  _ hell _ , Saryn?” 

She looked up to see Nidus looking at her. Soon, more voices joined the chorus, becoming a cacophony that raged in her mind. Some of them started to approach her, gesturing angrily. She still couldn’t process things well at all, but even in this state she could detect the meaning behind the actions. Out of the blue, she felt the impact of something against her head, and turned to see Ember, Glaive Prime in hand, ready to unleash its full force on her. Saryn couldn’t take it, and stumbled to her feet, backing up against the advancing mob, before turning tail and fleeing back to her orbiter, like a doe with a pack of rabid wolves on her tail.

Shaking. All she felt was herself shaking, and the enormous gaping hole that had just been ripped in her heart. She supposed it was karma. It was always karma, wasn’t it? It was just fair. For everything she’d done, everyone she’d hurt, it was only fair that now Mag would be the one to throw her out into the open like this, to tear away the curtain she’d so desperately tried to keep closed. Playing back the heartfelt things she’d hoped only Tyl would hear. But everyone had heard them now. Everyone knew how weak she truly was in the face of her justice. She wanted to die. Just curl up like an insect and die, right there and then. Who would miss her, anyway? Who wanted her in the first place? What use was there for a Warframe who was a pariah? They worked in teams, they worked in groups, in packs like wolves. Nobody wanted her in their pack. Nobody  _ needed  _ her in their pack. Not even her own operator wanted her. She was a dead weight, to be discarded and forgotten about by history. She’d be a footnote in the Tenno’s story of triumph one day. 

Saryn thought, feeling tears run down her face under her helmet.

What was she still doing here? Why was she still here? She heard someone calling her name, and resisted the urge to look back. The only thing waiting was more ridicule. More hate, more tar and feathers being dumped on her head. How could she have been so utterly stupid? Of course Mag would want revenge, revenge for all the time she had burnt being her lapdog, all that time she could have spent making real friends and genuine connections, she’d wasted on her.    
  
Her legs burned, but she kept running. She couldn’t take it. She was too weak for them. Too weak to face the music, too weak to take her punishment with some kind of dignity. She was an ugly little wilted flower, to be crushed underfoot. Not even the Lotus could love her now. Maybe not even Tyl.

Tyl. She wanted him more than ever now, just wanted him to hold her and let her scream. Wanted him, the one person she couldn’t have the most. She’d ruin him, she realized. She’d poison him like she’d poisoned Kelpie, Mag, everyone she tried to interact with. All she brought was ruin and decay and misery, on herself and others. It really would be better if she just disappeared. 

She lay on the floor of her orbiter, looking at the cold stars that glared down at her like judging eyes, her tears pooling on the cold metal at the sides of her face, going over the list of people she’d hurt. It was a long one, like an anthem proclaiming how utterly despicable she was. _ How ironic, that I called Kelpie the abomination when really it was me, the whole time. Kelpie, poor Kelpie. What have I done to her? Why did I decide to hurt her? Kelpie had done nothing wrong, an innocent, but then I just had to come and turn her into a nervous wreck who hid with her father for most of the day the way a foal clings to its mother.  _

_ I’m scared.  _ She had told Tyl.  _ Scared of being alone. You have no idea what it was like, before I had you...I had nobody. I dread the thought of having to toil for years to earn my forgiveness. That’s part of why I’m so happy to have you. I’m not alone anymore. I don’t feel as slimy and disgusting. I feel like, maybe I’m worth forgiving, that I really can try again. It’s been so long since I felt any kind of joy or love. Thank you so much, thank you for being able to love me, because nobody else can, and I sure can’t.  _ She had told him, resting her head against his chest. He’d stroked her back, and reassured her. 

_ It’s alright Saryn, it will all be alright. I won’t abandon you.  _ He’d told her, his voice surprisingly tender. How happy it had made her to hear that at the time. Something she’d wanted someone to tell her for so long, and now she wished they’d never met, if only for his sake. It was time for her to stop reaching out, to keep her hands to herself. She wondered if it was possible for her to lock herself back into her cryopod and go back to sleep until the universe ended.

_ What am I going to do now? What am I going to do?  _ She wondered miserably. There was nowhere for her to go. Nowhere that the others didn’t crawl around at some point, but she really should have taken her leave. After all, what good was trying to be better if nobody noticed? 

“Saryn?” Ordis called finally, seeing her disappear into the Helminth Infirmary and not come out. No response. He called out again. “Saryn, are you alright?” When there was no reply yet again, he decided to check it out for himself.

He’d made no secret of the fact that he despised the Helminth room, but it was a necessity all the frames had to live with, so, steeling himself, he popped in, just in time to witness a set of infested tendrils shoving her off the chair in the center of the room. She collapsed in a heap, motionless.

“Saryn!”

After a moment, she made an effort to raise a hand, waving him off. He noticed her chest heaving at odd intervals, and one tendril reaching down to stroke her hair. Although this did nothing to help ease her mood, she did take some small comfort in it. If he could have, Ordis would have joined in, but such a thing wasn’t possible for a cephalon such as himself. 

_ “Mistress keeps trying to subsume herself.”  _ the Helminth whispered, more tendrils helping sit her up, rubbing her back and shoulders, and one wiping her eyes. 

“Saryn, no! What would we do without you?”

“Everyone would do a lot better without me.” Her shoulders were slumped, and she buried her face in her hands.

_ “Tell the Lotus mother to do something for Mistress. She is inconsolable.” _ the Helminth hissed, clearly annoyed. One tendril exposed a sharp, slim, needle like protrusion and slipped it unceremoniously into her neck, holding it in for a minute or two and slipping it back out again. If she noticed, she didn’t seem alarmed.

“And what would you have me tell her, that she- _ tried to kill- _ subsume herself?” Ordis said, indignant.

“ _ That Mistress is in dire need of support, as we are not able to console her.”  _ It kept stroking her hair, doing what it could to help, allowing her to hold one of its tendrils close, most likely pretending it was Tyl. 

After a moment, Ordis conceded. “Very well, I will contact her. Although, I am unsure of what she might offer to her.” 

_ “Stupid Lotus mother.”  _ it hissed. 

“Don’t insult her! She’s trying- _ to make Saryn stop being a biiiitch- _ her best.” 

If the Helminth could have shrugged, it would. “ _ I care not for intentions, only for results. And right now, Mistress is trying to subsume herself. I cannot allow this, and I worry for the state of her mental health. And so, Lotus mother should do something.”  _

“Yes yes, whatever you say - _ you blob of shiiii- _ Helminth.” he huffed, and called the Lotus.

Meanwhile, Saryn sat in its embrace, either not noticing, or uncaring about the world around her. She seemed a bit more calm than when he’d first seen her, content to let the Helminth pet her. The Lotus promised to try and smooth things over, but she didn’t really seem to pay much attention to what was being said, such was the shock and pain she was going through. 

_ “Saryn?”  _ the Lotus called gently.

She didn’t move, didn’t look up, didn’t stir. The only sign that she was awake was her irregular breathing. The Lotus tried again. 

“ _ Saryn, I have heard about what happened.”  _ she said slowly. Saryn nodded, not trusting herself to speak. 

_ “Please don’t try and subsume yourself again. I’ll take care of it.” _ Again, just a nod.

“I...I would just like to be alone now, please.” Her voice was quiet, choked from the sobbing. 

The Lotus sighed.  _ “Saryn, let me-” _

“Please?” she interrupted, turning her head to look at her. 

The Lotus was taken aback, Saryn’s words and actions having given her pause. It occurred to her that if she pressed the issue further, she just might unwittingly alienate herself from her, throwing away any sort of assistance she could give in the future. Resigned, her shoulders slumped a tiny amount, unnoticeable if one hadn’t been paying attention. “ _ Very well, Saryn. Please call me if I can do something.”  _

After another nod from the frame, she ended the call, soon resigning herself to fall asleep in the Helminth’s tendrils.


	27. Alas, The Moth Still Flutters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She's growing a pair it seems.

As Saryn’s bones fell to the ground like pattering rain, she couldn’t really find it in her to care anymore. Even when the Witch dug into her rib cage as brutally as she could and pulled out each and every one as slowly and tortuously as possible, she barely even twitched.

_“Nothing you do will come close to hurting her anymore, just give it up, please!”_ the Moth cried, pacing back and forth like a skittish mare.

_“When I’m so close? I think not,”_ the Witch proclaimed, seemingly in denial.

_“Are you really so blind? You’ve lost your power, at least for now. Why don’t you wait until things improve? Unless you’re so desperate so see blood that you’ll do it even if you know you won’t get anything out of it.”_

_“Dearie, who’s side are you even on?”_ the Witch turned back to face her. _“Are you saying that we should postpone our work?”_

_“_ Our _work?”_ asked the Moth, a sneer in her voice. “ _Since when has this been_ our _work? I am only here because I do not have another choice. I’m the one trying to get you to back off. You’re killing her, and if_ she _dies,_ you _die too. Idiot.”_

_“Temper temper little girl.”_

_“I’m older than you!”_

The Witch turned her back, not deigning to respond. Instead, the sound of more bones hitting the floor filled the room. The Moth kept up her fevered pacing, hands clasped behind her back, occasionally glancing over to see what was happening, but immediately turning away again. 

_“Why are you doing this?”_ she asked finally. _“I mean...what’s the point of all this?”_

_“Someone’s got to be the mother around here. Someone has to do the punishing, and since you’re too fragile, I will.”_

The Moth hesitated. “ _Punishing? For what?”_

_“Sweetheart, how absent can you be?_ Everything! _Every last little sin she’s ever committed, from driving Kelpie into an Eidolon’s arms to falling in love with Tyl Regor. Everything.”_

“ _Has she not suffered enough? Besides, what kind of punishment is it if she can’t be bothered to acknowledge the pain?”_ She stalked towards the Witch, anger beginning to overcome her hesitation. 

_“Well, her checking out of reality at the door was_ not _part of the plan, you dolt!”_ The Witch crossed her arms, impatient with the delay. 

_“When will you learn that a good plan can change to fit the circumstance, not the other way around? Or don’t you care?_ I _care whether she lives or dies, but do you?Again, if she dies, we both go with her.”_

The Witch didn’t speak for a moment, the fingers of her right hand tapping her left arm. “ _You_ are _suggesting I stop, then, aren’t you? Now that I think about it, that’s what you’ve wanted all along, isn’t it? Tell me, what happens if I do, hm? Do you think that she’ll just go back to living her life, being happy, doing as she pleases? Tell me that you really believe that. Come on, I’m waiting.”_ She cocked her head at her. 

_“What do you even mean? Quit talking in riddles.”_

She sighed, sounding exasperated. _“I need not explain myself to you, nor am I sworn to do your bidding.”_ She turned, returning once more to extracting bones from Saryn. 

This time, the Moth was not content to just sit and meekly accept her hand. She grabbed the Witch’s forge tongs and wrenched them, trying to pull them free.

_“What is your problem!?”_ yelled the Witch, surprised. 

_“Explain yourself you bitch!”_

She tried to grab her tongs back, to no avail, the Moth simply spinning away. After a moment, she stopped chasing. “ _You’re just as worthless as she is,”_ she said, indicating Saryn. _“Now give them back!”_

_“Explain yourself first!”_

She sighed angrily, almost hissing. _“Fine, since you won’t be satisfied either way. What I’m saying, is that there’s no way she can be normal now, not after what she’s gone through. She has nobody, and no one will care what happens to her, not now. Just look at all she’s done, everything she messed up, all the times she fucked up things that nobody else would have. She’s worthless, and deserves worse than she got.”_

The Moth bristled. _“Worse than she got?_ Worse than she got?! _What can you possibly mean by that? How could she have gotten_ worse _? Aside from the fact that she’s been part of a living hell, she can’t get away from it while she sleeps, thanks to you! Just because you have to live out your petty blood fantasy. You disgust me.”_

_“Ah well, weak as you are, you would say that. This is something that needs to be done, whether you have the stomach for it or not.”_

_“Do not mistake kindness for weakness. I would think that you’d know better.”_ she said, stepping closer to her. 

_“You_ are _the weak one, whether you want to admit it or not, because if you weren’t you’d be joining me up here. You still think she can be saved. Look around! This hall is rotting just like she is, and as soon as I’m done, she’ll have gotten her justice.”_

_“This is not justice. This is sickness. She had her justice long before you got hold of her, and now, you want nothing more than to destroy her, destroy_ us. _Just because you feel like it_ .” The Moth shook her head. _“I’m done. I refuse to watch you do this, let alone be a part of it. This stops now.”_ She brandished the tongs at her. 

_“That would be a very noble statement, except you can’t. You can’t leave, you can’t stop it, you can only sit and cover your face. There’s nothing you can do to restore her to the way you used to be. She was too far gone even before we got to her. Why do you care so much? She’s not worth preserving. Let it go already.”_

Nervous and shaking though she was, Moth refused. _“Not after this.”_

The Witch smiled at her, dropping Saryn’s collar bone onto the floor, where it broke in half upon impact. _“Whatever you say dearie, but I know you’ll be back. You always are.”_

“Please help, my inner demons are arguing.” Saryn whispered, letting the Helminth pet her snow-silk hair as it cooed to her softly.


	28. If I Don’t Make it Home, Wrap the Orchids ‘Round my Bones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This wasn't worth it.
> 
> Please read the notes.

_“You’re alone”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“They’ve abandoned you.”_

_“Come to us little one.”_

_“Join us.”_ _  
_ _  
_ Mesa could feel her heart hammering against her ribs, and her legs shaking so badly she was having trouble walking. Touching down onto Larunda, she tried to relax. She’d find help here, hopefully. She made her way in slowly, trying to bring herself down. This wasn’t so bad, surely. Surely.

“Mesa!” she turned to see her dear Limbo running to her, his coattails flailing. Suddenly he was grabbing her shoulders and pulling her close, and she readily sank into his embrace. “You were gone for ages, what happened!?”

“It’s a long story. I’ll tell you later, promise. I just...I need to know who to warn about this. This is bad, like really really _bad_ , and I don’t know who to go to.”

“Alad, maybe, or Lotus? I’m not sure other than that. It would help to know what exactly was wrong, you know.” 

She rested her head against his chest. “I’ll tell you, promise. Maybe Alad for now, since he'd be the expert. I think. Well...maybe Lotus already knows? Ugh, this is a gigantic fucking mess.”

“Alright, maybe you should just take a few deep breaths, and try to think rationally about this.” He rubbed her back, trying to calm her down. 

She nodded. “You’re right. I think Alad is the answer, for now.” She gave him a quick embrace, and ran off to find the scientist, him on her heels.

"Alad, you damn nerd, where are you?" Mesa hissed, poking around his seemingly empty lab. Limbo looked up from petting Galatea.

"Try looking under his desk. He likes falling asleep in weird places."

"Well fuck me." She said, peeking underneath it to find the good scientist sleeping like the rocks she often accused his head of being full of. "Hey, wake up Sunshine! You're still on the clock!" she poked him in the cheek. 

He almost immediately, if groggily sat up, conking his head on the bottom of his desk and cussing loudly in Corpus. After a moment, he looked up to notice her there, and connected the dots. “What did you do that for?”

She stood back up, crossing her arms. “There’s something I really need help with, and you’re probably the only one who has enough experience with it to do anything.” 

"Alright alright, keep your spurs on, what happened?" Alad brushed himself off. 

"Saryn's infested."

The words brought him to a halt. He took a moment to process what she’d said. “Are...are you sure?”

She nodded. "Saw it with my own two eyes! She nearly killed me. This is most likely where she's been these last two months."

"How...no, it's possible but...where did you find her?" Alad practically jumped to his feet, pulling on his long black coat. 

“Oestrus, on Eris. What are you going to do?” she asked, nervous. 

"Someone's gotta go grab her and bring her here. As much as I hate to say it, she has to be cured or contained. With her spores, it's too dangerous to leave her Infested. She could spread the Infestation like wildfire if we leave her be.” He paced around his lab, thinking. “I’m open to ideas if anyone has any.” 

“I suppose we get a team and grab her. Maybe you could make some kind of tranq? Put it in something that could pierce her armor, and give it to me. I could definitely hit her.”

“I don’t doubt that, Mesa, but I don’t have anything for a tranquilizer ready to go.” His face brightened as he was hit with an idea. “What if you brought along Harrow, and he did his chains thing? You’ll need others, as well, of course.” 

“We could bring Harrow, but she’ll still be squirming and writhing, and her spores might be able to corrode his chains.” Limbo pointed out. “She definitely won’t come quietly.”

“Alad, do you have any tips for us regarding the infestation? Considering that you’ve had it, you know?” Mesa asked. 

Alad considered the thought. “Don’t trust anything she says, and don’t get closer to her than you absolutely have to. You can’t trust her, and there couldn’t be a more dangerous person to get infested. The Infestation loves to fill your head with lies, they’re like an abusive relationship, only worse. When they’re in your head… while you can barely hear yourself think, they can hear everything. If you’re not fully invested, not fully committed, it hurts like a bitch as well, while they’re digging in, ripping and piercing to rearrange your whole body into something as twisted and foul as the rest of them. There’s a reason I lost two and half limbs to them, a reason they couldn’t be saved.” he shook his head. “Saryn’s just about the only person I'd wish it on. Not even Nef, not even Frohd Bek, the absolute bastard. Of course, we can’t leave her like this, much as she deserves it.” 

“Topic for another time, Alad. The sooner we get her back here, the sooner we can save her.” Mesa checked her pistols, fussing over them. “So, Harrow, if he agrees, and myself are going, who else?” 

“How about we just send out a call for volunteers?” Limbo suggested. “The relay’s pretty full today, just go out and yell for people. You’re good at that, Mesa.”

She gave him a weak punch in the arm, and he laughed. “Alright then, I will.” She marched out, and hollered for attention. Once everyone was gathered around, she laid out the details. 

“Listen up, someone went and got herself infested, so I need Harrow to come along, as well as two more that have the balls for tracking down and capturing her. I’ll answer any questions, just get over here.” 

There was a long moment of silence, then Chroma raised his hand. “Who’s infested?” 

“Saryn. I don’t know how it happened, but I ran into her yesterday, and was barely able to escape. It’ll be dangerous, but it’ll be even more dangerous if we leave her there to spread the Infestation. With her abilities, it would be all too easy.” 

The room was quiet as a coffin, the tension so thick you could put a Corinth bullet in it, as the gathered frames whispered among themselves.

“Do we have to? Remember what I showed you all? How she’s probably a traitor, or worse. This could be for the best.” Mag piped up from the back. “Do we really want to waste time and resources saving _her?_ ” To Mesa’s annoyance, a few other frames seemed to agree. Sure, Saryn’s...relationship was nothing if not completely batshit, but leaving her to either die or become a full fledged Infested beast? That was a bit harsh.

“No, not an option. I understand why you’d feel that way, really, but she’s too dangerous this way to be left alone.”

“Then why not just kill her?” 

“ _Kill_ her?” Mesa was taken aback that she would suggest that. Then, she was furious. “Are you mad?! No, out of the question. I don’t care what she’s done, who she's snogging, or how much you _or_ Kelpie despise her, we’re not killing her. Try getting that over with Lotus. She’d probably sooner wring your neck!” she was almost growling at this point, making it very clear she’d hear no more talk of this sort. It fell silent again, Mag getting a very dirty look from Hildryn.

“I’ll go.” Chroma spoke up, raising his arm again. 

She sighed, relieved. “Thank you. You were Infested once, right?”

“Yes, and that’s why I’m going. Nobody deserves that fate. If I can save one soul from it, then I will be able to die happy one day.”

_“Chroma, no!”_ Titania whispered, sitting on his shoulder in pixie form. “ _How can you be willing to take that risk again?”_

“I’ll be fine, don’t worry,” he murmured to her, patting her head with a clawed finger. She hugged it tightly. He then stepped forward, joining Mesa at the front. 

“Thank you, Chroma.” She gave him a pat on the shoulder. “Anybody else?” 

After a prolonged silence, another hand went up. “I’ll do it.” Hildryn said, stepping forward as well. _I owe her that much._

Mesa nodded at her. “And thank you, as well, Hildryn. Now, does anyone know where Harrow is?”

“I’m here,” said a quiet voice behind her. She spun around, startled. 

“You didn’t have to do that, you know.” She sighed. “But anyway, now that we’re all here, we should get going as soon as possible. We leave as soon as Alad gives the ok, so grab your gear and get ready.”

He nodded, and Mesa dismissed everyone with her thanks.

“I didn’t think anyone would volunteer to be completely honest.” she said, leading them back to Alad.

“I want to see her back, safe and sound,” said Hildryn. “I’m worried about her, and I feel kind of bad that she’s gone as far as she has.” 

“To be perfectly fair, she made her own decisions,” said Harrow. “But, I agree. I too would like to see her back among us.” 

“You say that like she got Infested on purpose!” Hildryn said, smacking him in the back of the head.

“Are you saying that is not a possibility? We do not know, not at this point. I hope she did not, but...from my perspective, it is entirely possible.”

“I have to agree with the pope.” Mesa said. “The infested salvage is a very dangerous mission, and it’s so, so easy to lose track of your status and become vulnerable. That and...the Infestation, once it’s in your head, is very hard to resist. I know, and with Saryn being in the position that she was...well, she was vulnerable in more ways than one. I could see how it could be very alluring.”

Chroma nodded. “I can second that. It was like I was hypnotized into it, and I couldn’t do a thing about it. Props to you, Mesa, for getting away.” 

“Honestly, if I had stayed another couple of minutes, I would have surrendered and gotten infested again. That’s...not something I want. Come to think of it, it’s pretty lucky Alad joined when he did, with the remnants of the cure he made from Tyl Regor’s...whatever Oberon’s team gave him, or I would have been in an even worse spot.”

“Speaking of, we’ll be in a much worse spot if we don’t get over there,” Hildryn spoke up again. 

“You’re right. We should get going,” Chroma said. “We should get this done as quickly as possible.” 

Mesa nodded. “Alright, let’s go then.” 

She poked her head into Alad’s lab to find him running around like his coattails had caught fire, doing...whatever science stuff he was doing.

“You’re acting like Rygge when I accidentally step on his foot, what’s going on?” Hildryn called.

“The sooner I finish this tranq, the sooner you four can be on your way.” He looked up briefly. “Do you have a plan?”

“Not really, not yet. We can plan on the way.” 

Alad shook his head. “Recipe for disaster, right there. You should start now, while I’m getting this ready,” he said, indicating the tranquilizer-in-progress. “Also, Lotus wants her brought back alive, no questions asked. I checked. So if any of your have any ideas on how I can get on Tyl Regor’s good side, please tell me.”

Mesa sighed. “Okay, you’re right.” She turned to the group. “So, how should we go about this?” 

For a moment, everyone looked at each other, unsure. Then, Harrow spoke up. “I think a quiet approach would be best,” he said, gently swaying his thurible back and forth. “Avoiding combat seems to be the best option. Tell us, what did she look like? How badly has the Infestation crawled over her?”

“Shit...I didn’t get too good of a look at her, it was really dark most of the time. She looked taller though, and very...infested, basically. Also, there was this weird clicking noise whenever she walked.”

“I hate everything about what you just said.” Alad called.

“So do I, man. It’s too bad Umbra or Garuda didn’t raise their hands. A strong melee combatant like one of them would have been useful. So would his Radial Howl, or Excalibur’s Radial Blind. Damn.” she looked up at Hildryn and Chroma and backtracked. “Not that I’m not grateful for you two!”

“No, it’s okay.” Chroma patted her on the back. “You’re right, they would have been useful. We must make do with what we have, however, which I think is still pretty darn good.” 

Just then, Alad spoke up. “Alright, it’s done. I modeled it to fit in your pistols, but I don’t have time to make more, so you’ll only have one shot. If you miss, just...improvise, and mind the needle. ” 

“I’m sure we’ll find plenty of metal beams.” Chroma joked, receiving glares from the others. “What? You were all thinking it!” 

Mesa shook her head. “Anyway, thanks Alad. Let’s go.” She headed out the door, closely followed by Harrow and Hildryn. Chroma sighed, then quickly followed, not wanting to be left behind. 

Soon, they arrived at Oestrus, and Mesa found herself to be extremely nervous. 

“This place is creepy.” Hildryn said, shuddering. “More so than usual, knowing what’s lurking.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Mesa said, her voice shaking. 

“Do not worry, we will be alright.” Harrow patted her on the shoulder. “Trust yourself, and your skills. Things will work out.” 

“They’d better, or Saryn’s fucked.” Hildryn reminded them, hefting Larkspur.

“We’d better move,” Chroma spoke up, slinging Gram prime over his shoulder. “We don’t want to be caught unexpectedly.” 

Mesa nodded her agreement, and motioned them forward, taking point. Staying in a tight group, they made surprisingly little noise, as the only sound was the slight tap of their feet on the floor, weapons at the ready. Slowly, they made their way through the compound, listening for any out-of-place sound, watching out for movement. 

The minutes went slowly by, turning into an hour. Then two. Still nothing. Worried, but still determined, the group pressed onward, carefully. Two hours turned into three, and still there was no sight of her. Hildryn finally got up the courage to speak, the sound of her voice, though soft, ringing like a bell through the area. 

“Do you think she’s gone?” 

“That would certainly complicate things. Let us hope not.” Harrow responded, calm as ever.

The darkness seemed to crush them, holding them tightly in a fist with only the Infested tumors glowing softly to break it up. It was dead quiet except for the Infested scuttling around, groaning and shuffling. And then…

_Click click click._

“By the Lotus…”

“Mesa what is it?” Chroma asked.

“That’s her. That’s the sound she made.”

_Click click click._

Mesa froze in place, her breathing quickening, hands shaking. She didn’t dare move for fear of making a sound that would draw her to them. She felt a hand on her shoulder, and nearly screamed before turning to see Harrow there, reassuring her. She nodded, and took a few slow, deep breaths. 

_Click click click._

“Is she circling us?” 

After a moment, Harrow nodded. “It seems so. She might have already noticed us. No sudden moves, we don’t want to frighten her.” 

“We also don’t want to get stabbed by her.” Mesa muttered, clenching her Regulators. “Let’s see if we can find a room or something, lure her there, then have Harrow chain up the entrances and exits. Maybe have a vent or something we can escape into if need be.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Hildryn said, barely above a whisper. She started inching backwards, trying to look everywhere at once. Chroma patted her on the shoulder.   
  


“It’s alright, we’re all nervous. Don’t let it take over, alright?” 

She nodded, stopping and breathing before moving again. “I guess I’m just worried about her. I mean...she’s my friend, and I haven’t helped her at _all._ Maybe I could have prevented her from feeling like her only resort was a Grineer.” 

Nearby, they found a suitable room, and everyone got into position. “How do we get her here?” Mesa asked Chroma, curious.

“Easy. We bait her.”

She cocked her head. “What do you mean?” 

“I’m going to get her to chase after me and lead her here. Then, Harrow will do his thing with the chains. Hildryn, try and hold her down and keep her from squirming, and Mesa will take the shot.” 

“I hope she doesn’t hit me, instead,” she muttered, moving against the wall. 

“Don’t worry, I won’t miss.” _Hopefully,_ she added in her mind. 

“Right, that’s settled then. Places everyone, I’ll be back soon.” Chroma waved over his shoulder as he headed out. 

Following his ears, he soon found her, curled up in a nest of sorts made of Infested tissue and metal bits. He couldn’t make out much, only heard the strange clicking noise, and saw the luminous purple nodes glowing all along her...oddly lengthy form. 

“Saryn?” he called, keeping his tone gentle. Her head shot up almost instantly, her movements jerky, feral. “Saryn, it’s me, Chroma. I’ve come to take you back to the relay.” He activated another Antiserum charge, chasing away the red mist from his eyes and the voices from his ears. He took another step closer. It was a step too far. 

He had to roll out of the way as Saryn leapt towards him, that clicking following her, letting out an awful scream that was halfway between her normal voice and the Infested’s shrieks and wails. Chroma didn’t look back, merely getting to his feet and running. 

His claws left gouges in the metal-and-flesh floor as he sprinted, forcing himself to go faster. He could feel her presence on his tail, possibly mere inches behind him, but he didn’t dare look back, for fear of tripping or running into something. No, this was too important. Better to keep going, gawk later. He rounded a corner, his feet nearly slipping out from under him, and he felt something strike him between the shoulder blades. Pulling it out as he ran, he discovered a long, purple and black quill.

_As if things weren’t bad enough._

He passed through a familiar doorway, yelling “Harrow, NOW!” and jumping onto a suspended walkway. Harrow chained up the doorways just in time, leaving Saryn with nowhere to go. 

“What the fuck is _that?_ ” Mesa yelled, readying her Regulators.

Saryn stood before them in all her monstrous glory, shrieking in that awful, haunting way that only the Infested really could. It was hard to say where her armor stopped, and the Infestation started. Not much had changed from her waist up, aside from the gradual growth of infested tissue, vine-like ribbons hanging off her where it had overgrown, glowing nodes breaking up the hard grey carapace. One skein of it had managed to burrow into her neck, although the extent of it’s reach was impossible to tell. Sticking out of the hardened, sinewy grey flesh that gloved her arms were the same smooth, purple and black quills as the one that had nearly pierced Chroma through, almost as long as her forearms and as sharp as one of their blades. From the waist down, however...well, Alad’s legs have received kinder treatment. They seemed to be uncased in the lower half of a Carnis, her slender, scythe-esqe legs making that infernal clicking when she walked. 

She turned, looking at the four of them, and screeched again, her movements shaky, her head darting. Suddenly, in a blink, she lunged for Mesa, arms reaching out to grab her. She would have gotten her, too, had Hildryn not been paying attention. The bulky frame grabbed hold of Saryn from behind, her fingers digging into her infested flesh, yelling for Harrow. Seeing his moment of opportunity, he cast Condemn, Hildryn releasing her just in time to not get chained up with her. 

“Mesa!” he yelled, getting ready to cast Condemn again if need be.

She said nothing, simply triggering Peacemaker and aiming for Saryn, hands shaking violently. This shot would normally be child’s play for her, and if Saryn would just stop thrashing around, things would be much easier for her.

“Get closer if you have to, just take the shot, nice and easy,” Chroma said, trying to calm her. She nodded, and took a few deep breaths. Although the shaking didn’t stop, it reduced significantly. It was just enough. 

She took a deep breath, and forced herself to squeeze the trigger. There was the usual retort, and a wail from Saryn, who’s thrashing became even more frenzied, before finally keeling over, Carnis legs twitching and spasming like a dying centipede's. 

There was a long moment of silence, then a collective sigh of relief when Saryn didn’t wake right back up. Mesa bent over, hands on her knees, just relieved that it worked. 

“You did well, Mesa.” Chroma said, offering a hand, which she took.

“I wasn’t sure that it would work, even if I did manage to hit her.” She shook her head. “I’m glad it did, though.” 

“We all are.” Harrow said, coming up behind her. “It was quite an impressive shot, and we are all grateful you made it.”

“It’s definitely going to be easier to drag her to Alad now.” Hildryn joked halfheartedly.

“I guess one of us has got to carry her, unless someone has a better idea?” Mesa asked, looking around. 

Chroma lifted her up gently, mindful of her odd lower half. “I got it.”

She nodded her thanks at him. “Let us know if she gets heavy. Let’s go, then.” 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They had messaged Alad ahead of time, so he knew they were coming. He’d prepared a table for Saryn, laid out all his tools, supplies, and anything else he might need. Now, he busied himself with pacing around the room, waiting for them to show up. 

“Remember what we talked about, Alad.” Michi called, sticking her head through the doorway.

“Yes, I’ll leave my prejudices at the door, you don’t have to worry.” He sighed. “I just wish they’d come faster, so we can get started on this.” 

She came in and kissed his cheek. “You’ll be fine.”

“I hope so,” he said, giving her a quick hug. “Otherwise, I might as well lay down science. If I fail at this, there’s no coming back, especially since I’ve been infested before.” 

“I’m sure that you’ll do fine, dear.” She patted him on the back, before heading back through the doorway. “Wait, does Lotus know?”

Alad shrugged. “I didn’t tell her. I don’t know if one of the others did, but I wouldn’t bet on it, being they were busy with bringing her back.”

“You’d better tell her, she might have some advice.”

He was silent for a bit, then conceded. “You’re right, as always. I’ll contact her right away.” 

She smiled at him. “Let me know if there’s anything else you need, dear.” She turned, and headed back inside, leaving him alone with his thoughts. 

He called up Lotus, who was, to him, surprisingly distraught at the news, and he marvelled at how she could still are for Saryn, even after everything she’d done. 

“ _How did this even happen?!_ ”

“I’m not sure, Lotus. All I know is that Mesa came here after coming back from Oestrus, talking about how Saryn had chased her, almost killed her, and now her, along with Harrow, Chroma, and Hildryn, are bringing her back here.”

_“You’re going to help her, right?”_

“Of course I will, I’m not some cold, black-hearted fool who does whatever he wants, without thought of consequence or how it might affect others-” He cleared his throat. “I am sorry, Lotus, I didn’t mean to let myself go like that. I will help her, yes.” 

_“Thank you Alad.”_ she said, sounded extremely relieved. _“I never intended for things to go this far. If I had known, I would have stepped in sooner. Imagine, lonely enough for Tyl Regor. I-”_

“Alad get your nerd hands ready!” Hildryn shouted from somewhere outside.

He turned, and saw Chroma walk in, carrying Saryn over his shoulder. Or, something that looked like her, from the waist up. He briefly said goodby to Lotus, before jumping to get things going. Chroma set her down on the table, and stepped back.

“Was she...like this, when you found her?” Alad asked, looking her over, trying to shake some unpleasant memories out of his head.

“Yeah. It’s...I don’t even know how to describe it.” 

“It’s disgusting.” Alad finished for him, inspecting one of her Carnis legs. “One of you go get Ember, and a heat dagger.” he ordered, strapping Saryn down to the table. “Oh, and Oberon. Can’t do this without a healer.”

“What are you doing?” Mesa questioned, slightly concerned.

“I’m going to burn/cut this massive Infested part off of her, as well as take out that piece from her neck. It’s the only way, without dozens of hours of surgery, and there isn’t time for that, because if this isn’t taken out as soon as possible her mind will fall to it. However, without a healer, it will kill her, so please bring Oberon back with you.” 

“Alright,” she said hesitantly, before running off, bringing the two requested people and one requested sharp object five minutes later. 

“By the Lotus…” Ember stared in horror.  
  
“How the fuck?! Alad, are you sure you found her like this? You did nothing to her?” Oberon asked, his hand twitching towards the Bo prime on his back.

“Despite my absolute loathing of her, no I did not, and I have four witnesses who can vouch for me. I need the two of you here to help me undo this, in fact.”

“Oh.” Oberon looked around for a bit, then nodded. “Where do you need me?”

“Somewhere you can do what you need to do to heal her, but without getting in the way of Ember or myself. Speaking of, Ember, I’m going to need you to start burning the Infested tissue, and before you ask, burning because the Infested really don’t like heat or fire. I’ll cut away the dead stuff and anything excess. This is going to be very difficult and time consuming, so I hope neither of you had any plans.”

They got to work, first removing her Carnis legs, pulling them off with a nasty snap that made Ember shudder. The Infested tissue seemed to have a mind of its own, and twitched violently whenever Alad or Ember came anywhere near it, as if it knew the fate it had. They cut through the Infestation in sections, starting at the tail, and moving up. It was an intensive and slow-going process, everyone having to do their part. At times, Hildryn, Chroma, and Mesa would have to hold her down, despite her being unconscious.

Eventually, with most of the tail removed, they got to her feet, which immediately complicated things. They didn’t want to burn Saryn, or cut into her, so they slowed down considerably to make sure that wouldn’t happen. 

“Yeah, this is taking too long. I have a very affective but potentially stupid idea.” Alad said, standing back and throwing his coat on the floor.

“What idea is that?” Ember asked, stopping for a moment. 

“I’m just going to make one big cut up the front and peel it off.”

There was mass silence, then Oberon spoke up. “It couldn’t be worse than what we’ve already done, right? Go for it.” 

“I agree,” said Mesa. “It may not be nice, but it’ll get the job done quicker.” 

He simply nodded and took a deep breath before making the incision. Saryn twitched and whimpered softly, clearly feeling it. He then lifted the flaps of tissue with one hand and started severing connective meat with the heat dagger, helped along by Ember turning it black and crispy wherever she could. With Oberon healing her, in addition to the others holding her down, things went rather well. 

Although this was a much faster process, it was still a while before they got it off, but once it was, everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief. 

“I hope we never have to do that again,” Alad said, wiping his forehead. "Now all I have to do is take out the bit from her neck, and make a cure. One of those things is doable. The other...not so much."

“Which is which?” Oberon asked. 

"I can take the piece from her neck after a night of binge-drinking virgin tequila and screaming at Nef for roughly three hours."

"Wait, then how did you cure yourself from the Infestation? Or Mesa for that matter?"

"Neither of us were fully Infested, so the 'cure' I dredged up from Regor's research worked quite well. Saryn is...much farther along than either of us, so that would only work a slowing agent. I am nearly certain she can be cured, but it will take something much stronger."

Oberon thought for a moment. “Couldn’t you ask Regor about it, then? Being that this is Saryn, I’m sure he’d be willing to help.”

“Of course he would, even if it means working with me, but here’s something else that hinders this. For this to work, and I know it sounds ridiculous, but bear with me...well, she kind of has to _want_ it gone. She has to already be fighting it’s influence for any kind of cure to really work. It can be resisted, it’s very possible, and it has two effects. One being that you stay yourself longer, obviously. The other is that pushing at it, trying to keep it from corrupting you fully assists any kind of treatment. It’s basically like built in antibiotics. Saryn...from what I can tell, she doesn’t want to be cured.”

That brought everyone up short. Not wanting to be cured of the Infestation? 

“But…” Oberon started, then stopped, realizing he had nothing to say. Everyone was thinking the same thing, but it was Mesa who put it into words. 

“How can she not want to be cured? I mean, come one, she’s a Warframe.” She gestured uselessly at her form. “There has to be a way.” 

“I don’t know for sure yet, and it’s only a guess, so don’t get too riled up. We’ll have to see what she says when she wakes up, if she’s lucid enough. For now, leave her be. I’ll call you if you’re needed.” He said, careful to keep his voice devoid of emotion.

“You won’t do anything while we’re gone?” Oberon asked after a moment. 

Alad sighed. “No, Oberon, I won’t put her down, if that’s what you mean. Much as I’d enjoy burying my fist in her gut…” he trailed off. “No matter. She’ll be fine.”

“Thank you, Alad.” Oberon patted him on the shoulder, before exiting the lab, the rest of the frames following after similar gestures of thanks. 

Once he was alone, Alad let out a long, heavy sigh, glancing around the lab before his gaze settled back on Saryn. He had a long night ahead of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mesa's little misadventure with Saryn will be added in a flashback.


	29. Corrupting Influence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The hat couple has a chat.

“Hey Mesa.” 

She looked up from her position seated against a wall with her knees drawn to her chest to see Limbo, tipping his hat at her.

“Is the spot next to you open, my lady?” he said, in his usual gentlemanly way, and she felt herself smiling under her helmet.

“It is. Sit down already, you slimy flirt.”

“But it works.” He sat down, patting her on the shoulder. 

“It’s the hat. You’d be less charming without it.” 

“Good lady, you wound me so.” he laughed, putting his hand over his heart dramatically.

She laughed with him. “You wound yourself, more often than not.” 

He put his arm around her and pulled her close. He felt her loosen almost instantly and rest her head on his shoulder. “Enough banter. Tell me what’s wrong.”

She sighed heavily, her head and shoulders drooping. “I’m just shaken up by what happened with Saryn.” Her voice got quieter as she continued. “I mean, if I’d hesitated a moment too long…” She stopped, rocking back and forth slightly.

“Oh, Mesa…” he pulled her into a tight embrace, stroking the back of her head under her hat. “Would you like to tell me about it?”

Hugging him back, she nodded, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, actually. That might be nice.”

“If it becomes too much, just stop, I understand.” He rubbed a hand along her back, soothing her. She shook her head.

“No, it’s fine, I need to spit this out.”

He loosened the embrace, but didn’t let go, not that she minded in the least. “In your own time, then.”

_ The darkness seemed to drape over her in a shroud, wrapping her up in a death-tight grip that didn’t allow her to see more than a few feet in front of her, so black that it seemed a physical object that she could touch, and that blocked out all sounds except the shrieks and clicks of the Infested, and her own pounding heartbeat. _

__ _ Just a little longer and she’d be free to leave. That was her deal with the Lotus. Just ten minutes. _

__ _ She knew she could make it, at the rate things were going. It wasn’t that the mission was extremely difficult, although it wasn’t exactly easy. It was time consuming, and so, the Lotus had agreed to put a time limit in place, so that things wouldn’t take too long.  _

__ _ Mesa was doing rather well, all things considered. Especially since she was taking it solo. She’d taken down dozens, if not hundreds, of Infested, and managed to keep all three data consoles clear at the same time, for the most part. Other than the weird thing that seemed to be flicking among their midst, nothing was out of the ordinary, and even that was probably just a stray leg or tendril. She didn’t worry about it.  _

__ _ At least at first. The feeling that she was being watched, however, didn’t leave. It stayed, sitting on shoulder like an irksome ghost, pulling at her thoughts, nagging her to constantly look behind her, forcing her to pay attention to it. But there was nothing out of the ordinary. Yet it felt like there was.  _

__ _ She was heading to another console, when she heard a clicking sound behind her, not the regular Infested type, but louder, sharper, and...deliberate, almost. She rounded, raising her Regulators, ready to fire when, suddenly, she saw what, or who, it was.  _

__ _ Saryn.  _

__ _ She would have lowered her pistols, but something was off about her. She seemed...taller, somehow. She went to take a step forward, when Saryn threw her head back, and a sound came out of her, reminiscent of... _ oh no.

__ _ That blood curdling screech that was somewhere between a sob and a wail, like someone was being choked to death with a silken ribbon while simultaneously screaming their lungs out. The sound that comes out of a throat twisted and elongated, morphed into something a thousand times more hideous than it originally was, by an entity that stopped for nothing and considered no one. _

__ _ After a slight moment’s hesitation, Mesa turned on the spot, and desperately started running, abandoning the mission completely. She panicked as soon she heard the clicking start to pursue her, all logic and reason leaving her far behind. She sprinted along corridor, after room, after corridor. Not daring to glance behind her, she quickly darted outside, onto a pathway of infested branches and metal scrap. Her blood pounded in her ears as she felt the life support leave her like it was peeled off, weakening her by the second.  _

__ _ Still hearing the same noises coming from behind her, she continued sprinting forward. Suddenly, she heard a pinging sound come from the wall next to her, and she slowed down to look at what had made it. Not noticing anything at first, she kept moving, but then it happened again. This time, she noticed an arrow-like object embedded in the wall next to her. It was black, but faded to dusky purple towards the sticking point, and completely smooth for ease of entry. If she hadn’t already been panicked, this would have started it. Since she already was, her survival sense kicked in, and she almost tripped in her haste to increase the distance between her and Saryn.  _

__ _ She weaved back and forth in an effort to avoid the quills, not out of any sense of logic, but simply because of her powerful instinct. She had to get away from her, she just  _ had _ to, she couldn’t go down like this, leaving her comrades one ally short, leaving Limbo all alone. No, she would not do that, she  _ could  _ not do that. Death or infestation were not options for her.  _

__ _ As she dodged and wove along the hallway, she weighed her options. She could either try to circle back to extraction, though her chances of getting there in time might be pretty low, or she could try to face Saryn. After a moment’s consideration, she came to a conclusion. She would go for extraction, and if it became clear that she wouldn’t make it in time, she’d face Saryn. Better to go down fighting than running.  _

__ _ “Mesa! Extraction is on your left! Just run, you’re almost there!” came Ordis’s cry over her coms. _

__ _ The news reinvigorated her, and she quickly found the right branch, giving the final sprint everything she had left in the tank. Even so, she heard Saryn coming up behind her. As before, she didn’t dare turn around, depending on her adrenaline to get her there in time. She felt the Infested...thing behind her take a swing, and she shut her eyes tight and made one final leap...  _

__ _ And fell through the door, scuttling rearwards on her back as the door shut, watching the thing that was Saryn screech as she saw her prey get away from her. Mesa watched her raise her arms, and fire, only a couple of quills making it inside before the hatch closed, luckily missing her. Only then did she let out a sigh of relief. _

__ “And that’s what happened. Or, the bones of it anyway. I just...I don’t want to talk about it too much. Saryn...she’s not doing well.” Mesa said, cuddling close to Limbo.

Limbo slowly ran a hand along her spine, comforting her. “Do you think that something can be done?” 

“I don’t know. She’s definitely in a lot of pain from the Infestation trying to twist her body, but I don’t know if she even wants to get better.”

Limbo said nothing, simply holding Mesa close. Sometimes, it is better to say nothing, and let your actions speak for you. 


	30. Together We Can Work Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Working together to ask questions
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vXSq34-1vg

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long.

As another shrill scream split the air around the relay, Excalibur found himself shifting uncomfortably. He wanted to leave, truly, because he wasn’t some weirdo who enjoyed listening to someone in immense pain, but it was one of those things that seems to captivate you in some filthy way, hooking claws into your brain and making you stay.

It was gut wrenching, to say the least.

Of course, he’d heard all about this particular side effect of the Infestation before. Nerve-fraying agony as the disease tried to break and twist you into something nightmarish that only the most depraved human mythologies would dare spit out. But being told about something and bearing witness to it are two very different things, as he’d come to learn.

He wrung his hands in his lap as another scream drove all thought from his mind. He couldn’t focus on anything, not even on cleaning his weapons. He sighed, knowing what he’d have to do for peace of mind. After a moment, he stood, and all but forced himself to the door of Alad’s lab. He was surprised to find Mesa there, tapping her foot impatiently. He slowly walked up beside her, unsure of what to say.

“You here to scout, too?” she asked, flicking the brim of her hat.

“Yeah. I guess I’m just curious, but I wish I wasn’t. You?”

“Answers.” she replied, not elaborating further. He sighed.

“So what’s keeping you?”

She turned to look at him, then shrugged, the motion seeming awkward. “Not all questions should be answered. I’m trying to decide if mine are worth the trouble.” 

“You’re not concerned for her at all?”

“I am, I really am, at least, in the way you’re usually concerned for your comrades. It’s just...I’m not convinced that she won’t try to chase me on sight.” She sighed, her head drooping. “I mean, it doesn’t make sense that she would, not now, and I really want to find out what’s going on. I guess the only thing holding me back is my own head.” 

“She’s probably tied down or subdued in some way.” He pointed out.

Mesa nodded slowly, taking a deep breath. “That would make sense.” 

Excalibur thought for a moment. “You want to go inside together? Just clench your fists and do it, y’know?” 

After a brief pause, she gave a curt nod. “Fair enough. Lead the way.” 

He hesitated for a moment before steeling his nerves and walking in. 

Saryn was secured to an operating table with heavy manacles, thrashing and writhing like she was possessed. Infested tentacles growing off her back and hips whipped and grasped, while Alad did his best to grab them and cut them off before they did any damage. Oberon closed her wounds, and Hildryn helped pin her down as necessary. Alad himself was wearing an old, white coat and covered head to foot in Infested blood splatters, bits of tissue, and nicks from his blade. He looked up briefly as they entered. 

“Don’t just stand there with the door open. What do you want?” he snapped.

“We want to know what the hell is going on in here! It sounds like you’re killing her.” 

“If you mean killing the part of her that shouldn’t be attached to her, yes, that’s exactly what I’m trying to do.” He cut off another tentacle before it could take a swipe at him. “If you’ve come to gawk, just be quiet and don’t get in the way.” 

“Don’t take it personally,” Oberon spoke up. “He’s just stressed because things aren’t going as smoothly as he’d like.”

“How long does it take someone to go on a tranquilizer and painkiller run?” Alad ranted. 

“Would you like me to go?” Excalibur spoke up. 

“You stay here and don’t touch anything.” he hissed between the hilt of Icefall clamped in his teeth, hands occupied with mixing chemicals at a desk on the far side of the room.

“Okay, just trying to help.” He backed away, raising his hands submissively. 

Just then, Michi burst through the door, and gave Alad a package. “I’m sorry it took so long, but it’s ready to go.” 

Alad tore it open to reveal an array of huge syringes, their needles looking big enough to pierce even a Sentient’s hard armor, all filled with a neon blue liquid. He picked one up, and stabbed it into Saryn, ejecting it’s full contents into her, and making Excalibur wince slightly. It didn’t take long for her to stop moving, at which point, Alad breathed a sigh of relief.

“Sweet unholy fucking profit, I thought she’d never go down.”

“I’m still awake.” Saryn interjected quietly.

Alad looked awkwardly at the others. “So...only the Warframe part of you is awake, then?” 

“...For now. It still hurts...and it...it will wake up. You’re fighting a losing battle.” She winced as she spoke. 

“And how would you know?” he asked, unsettled by how calm she seemed to be.

“Because...you can’t fix what...what doesn’t want to be fixed.” She coughed weakly. “Forcing it will only cause further breaking.” she said slowly, forcing her words out from the haze of drugs in her system, sounding slightly slurred. 

“Sometimes, it is necessary to break something in order for it to heal properly,” Oberon said quietly. “Otherwise, being either healed improperly, or not at all, it will cause needless pain.” 

Saryn simply shook her head, the motion seeming pained, and turned her attention back to Alad. “I can’t...stop you from...from trying, but you’ll never succeed.” 

He stopped, and set down his tools, sighing. “Look, Saryn, I know you don’t want this, and you don’t think we can do it, but trust me when I say that we will cure you of the Infestation, because if we don’t, our options are either finding a place secure enough that’ll hold you for eternity or killing you, because you’re a danger to everything else that’s alive and not Infested in this state. Understand?” He gave her a harsh look. “So don’t give me that crap.” 

“Either of those...would be better alternatives, really.” She coughed again, wheezing. 

“If that’s what you end up wanting after this is done, do it yourself. Until then, I’m going to save your life. Even if it is against your wishes.” He picked up Icefall, motioning to Oberon and Hildryn to resume their positions. 

“Alad, don’t encourage her to off herself,” Mesa spoke up. “She’s got enough to deal with as it is.” 

“He’s not wrong.” Saryn said, giving Mesa a look.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” Oberon said, placing his hands on either side of her head. “For now, let Alad do his work.” 

“Which I wouldn’t need to do in the first place if she hadn’t been so stupid.” he murmured.

“Alad…” Oberon warned. “This is not the time to go there.” 

“What? Are you saying that I’m wrong?” he challenged. “Don’t you shut me up, this needs to be said, and I think it would do her better to hear it, if only for her to understand the magnitude of how badly she fucked up.” he shook his head.

“You were Infested, too. You fell for...the same tricks I did.” she said, almost defensively.

He leaned over her so they were looking each other in the eyes. “You’re really going to pull that card? I may have gotten infested, but I didn’t try to cling onto it. That decision, that mistake, is the reason I have one and a half real, flesh and blood limbs, the reason I resorted to cutting off my own arm. It nearly destroyed me. What’s your excuse?” 

“You were still in the same position as me when it got you, weren’t you?” she asked, her voice wavering. “That’s what the Infested are made for. To be predators. Weak prey is easy prey. You and I were the same to them, a favored target. An  _ easy  _ target. Don’t pretend like you didn’t walk into the same trap.” 

“I managed to pull myself out of that trap.” he responded, trying to keep his cool.

As the painkillers in the shot started to take effect, Saryn was able to breathe, and found it easier to speak. “Not exactly. You got pulled in ankles first and came out the other side without them. Not what I’d call ‘pulling yourself out’. More like, you got spit out.” She replied, with equal coolness that leaned towards frigid.

“Oh, so now you think that just because you’ve become Infested, you know all about it?” His voice rose as he spoke, his gestures becoming sharper, angrier. “Of course you would. Forget the fact that I’ve studied it, not to mention surviving it in the process. You know what? Forget that I know anything about it, apparently. You must know enough on your own, the way you’re talking, so why do you go ahead and cure yourself?” 

“We both know what would happen if that was left in my hands. You’d prefer it that way, I’m sure. Too bad the Lotus won’t let you just leave me in a cage somewhere.”

Alad looked at her for a moment, then turned away. “She’s the only thing that is keeping that from happening.” 

“At least you admit it.” Her voice went hard, cold as ice, sharp as broken glass. “Now stop putting up a front of being concerned about what happens to me, your lack of sincerity makes my stomach churn.”

He rounded on her. “Think outside of yourself for one damned minute. I’m concerned for the Tenno as a whole, just because you got yourself Infested. You’ve put everyone in danger, because you couldn’t see past yourself!” 

“You’re right, how could I have been so selfish? How couldn’t I have been aware that killing myself would be such an egotistical act from me? How couldn’t I have seen that it would put the whole System in danger and lead to the collapse of the universe or something? You see how that sounds, you ex-Corpus fraud? It sounds wrong, doesn’t it? I am  _ so _ sorry that I wanted to get my utterly pathetic existence out of all of your lives. I thought that’s what you were all gunning for. Don’t tell me I’m wrong  _ now.  _ The only reason they call suicide a selfish act, is because it cuts open the hearts of everyone who cared, but I don’t have that problem, now do I?” she spat.

“Wait, but the Infestation wouldn’t have killed you.” Excalibur interjected, and immediately wished he’d kept his mouth shut.

“Oh, wouldn’t it? Wouldn’t the consciousness of a putrid psychopath, everything that she is, be completely erased and absorbed into the hivemind, that festering sea of cancerous flesh? Purging her of everything she was, everything she’s done, every sin marked in the status logs of her peers, who have long since dumped her into the cold recesses of the Void anyway? If you couldn’t tell, it’s not death, but it might as well be.”

“What about Regor?” Alad said, giving her a look. “You bent over backwards to be with him, you gave no fucks to your own faction, your comrades, and what they would think, you disregarded any advice or judgement you were handed. You did everything in your power to stay by his side, and now, suddenly, after all that, you throw it, and your life away like it meant nothing.”

“Don’t bring Tyl into this!” she shouted, strained at her bonds.

“Why? Did I just remind you that he matters to you, and now you can’t find any way to justify your death?”

“Don’t bring him into this, don’t pretend like you even begin to scratch the surface of my motives,  _ and don’t fucking pretend like you care about him or me! _ You’re just seething on the inside, because I managed to find someone who actually tolerates my existence!” she shrieked, heaving against her manacles.

“Did you even bother telling him where you were going? Did you tell him of this little scheme of yours?” Alad asked her. She stared back at him, silent, and he shook his head. “Of course you didn’t. Why did I even ask?” 

“Shut up, just shut up!”

“You didn’t even leave a note, did you? You would have left him to find out through rumor, if he got the news at all.” When she wouldn’t meet his gaze, he grunted dismissively. “And you claim you love him.” 

“Shut the fuck up before I get loose and  _ strangle _ your skinny, pale, worthless ass with my bare hands, pop out your bulging eyes and  _ eat them! _ You know  _ nothing, nothing, NOTHING! _ ” She strained once more against her binds, wildly, breathing hard, trying to suppress the sob building in her chest that fluttered like a caged bird. 

Saryn fell quiet, her breathing evening out. There was no use in continuing. They’d never understand. Heck, she wasn’t quite sure she understood it herself. Even if she was able to explain it, they wouldn’t listen, most likely. 

Surprised by her outburst, Alad took a few steps back, suddenly having second thoughts about having pushed as far as he did. He brushed those aside quickly. She didn’t deserve his pity or mercy.  _ Anyone’s _ , actually.

Excalibur looked at Mesa for a moment, before stepping forward and sitting next to Saryn’s table. “I suppose I should start from the beginning. Why did you want to become Infested? What happened, what led to all this?”

She gave a bitter laugh and looked over at him. “Where do you want me to start? The isolation or the slow degrading of my sanity?”

“Whichever came first, I suppose,” he answered, after a short pause. “I mean, was there a single incident, or a chain of events that brought you to this state?” 

"I feel like this should be obvious, but then…" she stopped herself. "Well, let’s see. I had my life crash down around me, I've been verbally beaten up by one of only two men I've ever loved, been a pariah for the last several months, been completely alone except for Tyl, Lotus hasn't said one fucking word to me in age, my hand got crushed, I can't sleep anymore, I thought I finally found happiness only to have it ripped away and shredded because Mag had to stalk me like the creepy blank faced bitch that she is, and my will to live has took itself out back and shot itself like a lame horse. Does that answer your question?"

Excalibur had no response, and simply nodded after a moment, looking elsewhere. 

“It should be clear now that I really had no plans to survive this, so thanks for throwing the wrench into things. Jerk.” she said, glaring at Mesa. “You could have left me alone, could have left me to my fate and nobody would have cared, but nooooo. You just had to go and blab. Should’ve kept that big mouth of yours busy doing something more useful, like wrapped around Limbo’s-”

“Ok Saryn, you’ve made your point.” Mesa interrupted. “You’re mad that I saved your life, fine.”

“I didn’t want nor need it saved.”

“Could’ve fooled me. Getting Infested is a pretty shoddy way of offing yourself if you ask me.”

“Ah well, I’m not really brave enough to put a gun in my face.” she replied dismissively. “If I was, I probably would have done that a long time ago.”

“So you’d rather just let yourself rot into the floor? How is that preferable?” 

“Anything’s preferable to continuing to live this way. Fact is, I have no reason to keep living. I am useful to no one and needed by no one. Every time I tried to change things I got slapped in the face and sent back to my corner. I’m tired of it.”

“What about Regor, then?” Mesa asked quietly.

“I’m not allowed to have him, that much is clear. Even if Mag hadn’t decided to play detective, either we would have gotten busted in some other way, or he’d have gotten sick of me. All because I’ve been cursed by this metal skin that has come to define nearly every aspect of me, and what am I, really? Just a human. Human wrapped in cold, unfeeling steel, a suit of armor I never asked for, and despise living in.”

“We all have that same outer coating, and yet nobody else has this problem.” Mesa pointed out.

“Then I guess you’re all that much more redeemable than me.”

“Why? You think that any of us have nothing that we regret?” she said, motioning around the room.

“You stupid little girl, do you think any of that is comparable to everything I’ve pulled? After everything that’s happened, it’s quite apparent that my life is now of a lesser value than any of yours. Maybe it used to be worth something, a long time ago, but it’s not anymore. I’ve ruined myself, the way my spores rot things away. All I’ve really done is shoot myself in the foot.”

Mesa shook her head, exasperated. “You’re really convinced of that, aren’t you?” 

"Where's your evidence otherwise?" 

She went to answer, then realized she didn’t have anything to say. Instead, she huffed, and turned away. 

Saryn continued. "I mean...nobody other than Hildryn and Harrow even tried to talk to me, much less bring me back into the fold, and I was too afraid to keep either of those fires burning for very long. I've been so alone for so long, feeling this black despair chewing holes through me. I overstepped my allowance by trying to reach out or find love again. You can rest assured I won't be doing that again."

“Doesn’t Regor at least deserve to know?” Oberon spoke up, looking at her. 

"You can tell him if you'd like, but he's better off without me. I should have never come to him in the first place, and I’d rather he not come after me."

"Why him?" Hildryn asked, spitting out the question they were all thinking. "Why Tyl Regor, of all people?"

"Don't be like that, as far as Grineer go, I could have done worse. As for why, I really don't know. He was just unfortunate enough to run into me at the wrong time, but he was good to me, and he made me happy for the first time in ages. I should have never gone there, but hindsight is twenty twenty, and it's mocking me."

“And why did you never come to me with any of this? I thought we were friends, in a way.”

“I’ve figured out your angle, I’m sorry to say. I didn’t feel safe, because who knows what you’d tell the Lotus?”

“What!? How did you-” she gaped.

“It took a bit of thinking on my part, that much I will confess. To put it simply, you were suspicious from the beginning, and I just didn’t notice at the time because I was desperately lonely. I was being shoved aside, threatened, physically assaulted, thanks to dear Ember, and it wasn’t very safe for me to lower my guard and trust anyone, except maybe Ordis. Then you come along, the only person to come along, offering one hand, and the knife strangely absent from the one behind your back. In hindsight, it was very fishy, and I figured either it was a conspiracy to ruin me further, or the Lotus had set you up to it. I settled on the latter, and it appears I am correct, yes?”

“...Yes. I’m sorry, if that’s worth anything. I did come to like you, even with Lotus’s meddling.”

Saryn had nothing to say in response, only feeling the lump in her throat grow.

“And now I suppose we should address the water horse in the room. What about Kelpie?”

Almost on instinct everything went dead silent and all eyes turned to Alad, who had gone rigid, arms crossed. “Let’s hear it then. Tell us, what do you have to say for yourself about her?” he scoffed, his silver eyes gleaming angry.

“...What about Kelpie? Why does it need to come back to her? This has nothing to do with her, and she doesn’t have a hand in this situation, and it always seems like it has to come back around to her like a snake biting its own tail. Fine, so be it. What  _ else _ must you know about your precious little predator?”

“Why do you hate her so much?” Oberon asked, in his usual calm tone. “Because really, this does all go back to her. It started with you deciding to toy with her, so what is it?”

“I don’t hate her anymore. I don’t feel anything for her, actually. The only emotion I can conjure up when I think about her is a blank, empty void of nothing traced with regret. The worst thing I ever did was try and go after her. That was my fatal mistake, in that you’re right. What could I even say? She was everything I wasn’t, and everything I used to be.”

“Is that your only excuse? Envy?”

“Did you seriously expect anything better from me? It’s not like I was in the best mindset at the time, although now it’s significantly worse. I mean...what did you expect? Oh, it goes deeper than mere envy, but that’s not something I think any of you would care to hear, and it’s not the point, and I don’t see why we had to bring up Kelpie in the first place. Hers is just another example of the series of fuck ups and failures that make up the miserable life that is mine.”

“When will you stop this endless loop of self pity? It’s pathetic, even for you.” Alad huffed.

“It’s not self pity, because I don’t feel bad for myself at all. This is just karma. All of it, every single laughable tragedy that has taken place, I have brought on myself, in one way or another. It was only a matter of time until the hammer fell, sooner or later.” she said, with no trace of uncertainty, but her voice was quiet, nearly a whisper.

Her final comment brought everything to a halt. What else was there to say? They all thought that, didn’t they? She was just bringing voice to that. Alad agreed, and thought she deserved worse, Oberon and Hildryn agreed, but believed she could do better, Mesa was just a bit divided, and Excalibur, despite everything, wanted to help. In what way, he didn’t know, but her words had brought a noticeable somberness on him, all of them. 

  
Eventually, Saryn got her wish to be left fully alone, dosed with more tranquilizer to keep her Infested mind sleeping, although there was no way the rest of her would follow. In the silent darkness, she left her helmet off and began to weep.   



	31. King Arthur and Mordred

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Excalibur talks to Saryn

“That was...enlightening.” Oberon said, breaking the group’s silence as they sat around, trying to process everything.

“Not the way I’d put it,” Hildryn spoke up.

“Same here. That was depressing.” Excalibur said mournfully.    
  
“I can’t say that my questions weren’t answered, but…” Mesa trailed off, unsure of what to say to describe the way she felt. 

“She needs help.” he finished. 

Oberon nodded thoughtfully. “I agree, but I’m honestly not sure what to do to help her. I mean…” He stopped, lost for words. 

“You mean, none of us have ever seen someone take things that far,” Hildryn added. “Not even close.” 

“No one has ever been in Saryn’s position before.” Excalibur said, knees drawn to his chest. “Someone could have helped her a whole lot sooner, so she didn’t feel like she had nobody to turn to, and none of us did.”

“Don’t go blaming yourself now.” Oberon advised, tapping Bo prime on the ground rhythmically. 

“But it is my fault.  _ Our  _ fault. I could have at least tried. I was considering it, but I never did, and now look what’s happened. Who knows if she’ll even live to the end of the week? Trying to cure an Infestation is already hard, but trying to convince her to let us help in time? Unless Alad went to Tyl Regor for help, but he'd never do that. He essentially wants her in a grave, and he’s too proud to ever work with Regor, especially since it’s Saryn’s life on the line. He’s only attempting this because Lotus is making him. ” 

Oberon stood up and walked over to him, sitting beside him. “I promise that you’re not the only one thinking that, but you can’t think about what could have been, or you’ll find yourself going down the same path that she did. Just learn from it, and move on. Think about what you can do now, because that’s what matters.” 

“I don’t see anything else we could do, except getting Regor involved, and that’s a can of worms I am very hesitant to open.”

“I agree, that could go very wrong,” Mesa interjected, fidgeting with her pistols.

“It doesn’t look like Alad will be able to fix her unless he gets help, but Alad will never go to him. So someone else has to ask. I think.” Hildryn suggested.

“I’m definitely not the one for that,” Mesa proclaimed, grunting. “Honestly, who here would be up for that?”

“...Kelpie?” Excalibur offered tentatively.

“Interesting…” Oberon said. “Why her?” 

“Her and Tyl are friends of a sort. At the very least, they like each other, and if Alad finds out who tattled, he’ll probably either be less mad, or let it slide because it’s her.”

“Fair enough, I suppose. I can ask her.”

“Sounds like a plan. I’m going to try and think of something else to help Saryn. I should have done so a lot sooner.” he vowed.

“We all should have,” Hildryn said. “But, Oberon is right. Let’s focus on the future. Like how we can get her to cooperate with us.”

“She needs to feel like she has a life beyond getting cured. Like there’s something worth going back to.” Excalibur mused, almost to himself. “I’ll see if I can think of anything and get back to you all.” he said, getting up to leave.

“Then I’ll go talk to Kelpie.” Oberon said, giving Excalibur and the ladies a nod before taking his leave, Excalibur following suit, leaving Hildryn and Mesa talking quietly while the latter messaged Limbo.

He took a deep breath, and entered, trying to keep focus. This was not an easy favor to ask. Sure, Kelpie was friendly with Tyl, but not Saryn. Who knows, maybe she’d want Saryn Infested just as much as Alad seemed to.

“Hey, Oberon. What’s up?” 

The voice startled him out of his reverie, and he looked into the corner to see Kelpie floating serenely in her tank. He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry, my mind is somewhere else right now. How’s things with you?” 

“They’re alright. It’s been peaceful, aside from Saryn’s...issue. She’s making Dad lose sleep because of her constant screaming.”

“She’s in a lot of pain, you realize. I doubt she wants to be howling her throat out like a crazed wolf.”

“I suppose you’re right.” Kelpie said quietly. “How have you been?”

Oberon went silent for a moment, gathering his thoughts. “I’m hanging in there. Dealing with Saryn hasn’t been...easy, since Trinity won’t do her bloody job and let me off the hook for a while, so I don’t really get much of a break when I’m needed, but I am a doctor first, complainer second, unlike her. If nothing else, watching Alad lose his shit is...entertaining, to say the least.”

Kelpie gave a very horse-like snort of laughter. “It is, it is. I assume this isn’t just a social call, though. What brings you here?”

He shuffled a bit, not eager to bring up the subject. Taking a deep breath, he willed himself forward. “I have a favor to ask, and I’m not sure how you’ll take it.” 

She turned to face him, her head cocked to one side. “I won’t know until you tell me. What is it?” 

“It...well...you’re still on good terms with Tyl Regor, right?”

“Seeing as how I’m dating one of his Tubemen, yeah, we’re on good terms.” she laughed. “Why?”

“I need you to talk to him, and to tell him about Saryn’s...condition. He might be the only one who can help fix this.” Oberon said, more forcing his words out. 

“I...what? Why? Why  _ me _ ? We’re not friends, Saryn and I, I’m sure you know that.” she asked, shocked.

“Yes, I know, but we need you because you’re on good terms with him, and as a bonus, if Alad finds out who spilled, he’ll be less angry, or even let it slide because it’s you, and he loves you, and if he thinks you thought helping Saryn this way was a good idea, I think he’d roll with it. Aside from that, Saryn is a danger to the whole System if she gets fully Infested, with those spores of hers. She needs to be cured, there’s no other way.”

Kelpie was silent for a while, staring at nothing while she thought it through. “Alright, I’ll help,” she said finally, her voice quiet. “I supposed it’s not much, just sending a message, so it should be alright.” she said, quickly pulling out her comms and typing it up.

“How long do you think it will take him to respond?”

“I don’t know. Depends on if he’s working or not.”

“I can stick around for a bit while we try to be patient. You have anything in mind to keep us occupied?” he asked, tone noticeably brighter.

“I got some new pieces for my shelf. You wanna see them?” she asked eagerly, practically bounding out of her tank, shaking off water.

Oberon nodded, and she proudly led him over to her display. Around ten minutes later, Kelpie’s comms sounded off, and she opened it to find one little sentence from Tyl.

_ Warn your father. _

“What does that mean?” she wondered aloud. Oberon looked a bit more concerned.

“Maybe you should go tell Ala-”

_ “You motherfucker!” _ came the voice of the Grineer scientist in question from the general direction of Alad’s lab.

“Heh...he got my message.” Kelpie said, trying to repress her laughter.

“I hope he isn’t too hard on him. Alad’s already been through the wringer.” 

“And  _ I  _ hope they can both pull off the ‘I-hate-your-existence-with-every-fiber-of-my-being’ goggles and try to work together.” she said, trying to focus on the gravity of the situation.

Oberon nodded. “That’s the hope. I’m not sure how things will go if they can’t work together.” 

“I think they’ll be fine. Dad is the more stubborn one, so if Tyl can convince him to set his ego aside, things will work out.” 

“Let’s hope so.”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Excalibur strode through the neon maze of Fortuna, trying to not talk himself out of his idea. It...admittedly, was not a great plan, but it was the best he had. Saryn needed a reminder, so he’d get her one. An unconventional one, but at this point he wanted nothing more than to remedy his mistake, so he was willing to go through with this ridiculous, and somewhat embarrassing, quest. 

Still, he took his time greeting everyone he knew around the underground city. He’d become quite popular, stopping by just to talk or help with tasks. A Warframe’s strength and speed was always welcome, and his cheery personality lent some levity to the usually grim denizens. 

Too soon, he came across The Business, known to everyone else, aside from Limbo, as Biz. He took a deep breath, steeling his nerves.

“Hey Biz!” he called, waving. 

Biz swivelled his rather brick-shaped head over, waving back cordially. “Excalibur, how do you do?” 

“I’ve...been better, you?”

He nodded agreeably. “I’ve been well, nothing out of the usual. What brings you here? You seem a bit...wary. Something up?” 

Excalibur glanced around, uneasy. “I’m looking for an item, and I’m hoping that you’re able to procure it for me,” he said, his voice quiet as he leaned forward. 

“And it’s embarrassing and or weird, right?” he laughed and pat Excalibur on the shoulder, shaking his cybernetic head. “Come now, I’m sure it can’t be that bad.”

Taking a deep breath, the frame nodded. “I...” he sighed. “I need a floof of Tyl Regor.” 

“Well.” Biz thought for a moment. “You’re the first one to come asking for one of those, I’ll tell you that much for free.” 

“It’s not for me, it’s...for a friend of mine. Well, she’s not really my friend, but she should have been, if I hadn’t been such a milksop.”

“...Don’t you already have a girlfriend?” he asked, curiously. 

“Yes, this isn’t for Wisp, it’s for someone else, and not in a romantic way. She’s already romantically involved with the Grineer in question.”

“If you’ll forgive me, it sounds like you’ve gotten yourself into a rather complicated issue with this mystery being,” he said slowly. Then, nodding, he continued. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m not asking you to explain yourself, merely stating the facts as I see them.” 

Excalibur shook his head. “I feel too awkward not to explain myself. One of my...er...less well-liked colleagues got Infested, and she...doesn’t want to be cured for some...depressing reasons, lets say.”

“And the floof?”

“A reminder.” Excalibur said simply.

When he didn’t elaborate, Biz nodded, the movement seeming awkward. “Well, I can say that I should be able to get one of those for you.”

“Oh, thank you so much. How much?” 

“I’ll tell you what. Since you’ve helped me out quite a bit, and since we’re friends, I’ll give you half off my usual price. Just this once, since you’re going through a difficult time.” 

“You’re making things much easier on me.” Excalibur handed over the credits, relieved.

Biz slapped him on the back. “You’ve done me favors in the past, so it’s the least I can do. Before you go, how soon do you want it?” 

“As soon as you can get it. This...might help save a life, as dumb as it sounds, and trust me, I know this sounds insane, but just...trust me.” Excalibur let out a heavy sigh. 

“Don’t worry, you know I trust your judgement.” He took out a datapad, and did some quick calculations. “I can have it to the relay in two hours, does that work?” 

“Yes, it does. Thanks man, I owe you one after this.” The frame let out a relieved sigh, and shook his hand heartily. “That takes a load off my chest.” 

Excalibur sat quietly in his orbiter, stroking Verdandi’s soft, white, turquoise striped fur, trying to

push down his jitters. He was second guessing himself big time.

“Who knows if this will even help? I mean, how is she going to react. What if she thinks I’m mocking her or something?” he said, to nobody in particular. Verdandi gave a whine and nuzzled him. He absentmindedly pet her, coming to no conclusion. “What do you think, girl? Am I doing the right thing?”

She barked happily, wagging her short tail and placing a paw on his knee. “You really think so, huh?” He scratched her behind the ears. “I guess I am overthinking things. Should I just go and give it to her?”

She barked again, licking his helmet. 

“Tonight, then. I don’t need any...questions.” He turned the plush over in his hands. “I hope she likes it, at least. Maybe if she’s reminded of the man who loves her enough to risk his position to be with her, she won’t feel so alone. Still, it’s a very big gamble.” 

Verdandi butted his thigh with her head. 

“You’re right, I’ll stop second-guessing myself. Tonight, I promise.” 

She rested her head in his lap, and he scratched her behind the ears, deep in thought. On paper, it seemed like it would work. He looked at the floof again. It was the spitting image of the scientist, while lending him a cute, soft look he definitely did not have in real life. It felt good to handle, the kind of floof you just want to squeeze, even if you’re an adult. He sighed, still unsure about it. The only way to know how it would go was to do it, he thought. 

Several hours of impatient waiting later, Excalibur stood outside of Alad’s lab, holding the floof. He’d been hesitating here for some minutes now, more nervous that he’d been in his orbiter. The relay was dark and quiet, letting all the non-Warframe inhabitants get their sleep uninterrupted, which served his mission well. 

_ Enough indecisiveness, you came here to give it to her, so do so! _

Steeling himself, he opened the door, and slipped inside, trying to remain undetected. The less he had to explain himself, especially to a certain ex-Corpus, the better. He poked his head in a few dark rooms before coming across a locked door, the lock quickly palmed and opened. He found Saryn, still tied down, looking wilted and miserable. Her head constantly turned to look around, the regrowing Infested nodes on her body lending a pale, eerie luminescence to her figure.

“If you’re going to gawk, you might as well come up close.” she said quietly, making him jump.

“Er...sorry, I didn’t mean to seem like I was spying.” he apologized sheepishly. 

She sighed. “I guess it’s fine, since everyone else has been by to stare at me, too. You coming in, or not?”

He stepped inside, noticeably uneasy. “Sorry. I’m not here to gape like a fish, promise.”

“Then why  _ are _ you here?” she asked, her tone not cold, just...flat. Emotionless. 

“I..uh...I brought you something.” He went to give it to her, then remembered that her hands were tied, but the mechanism wasn’t all that complex, and he had them freed quickly. She stretched them a few times, before crossing them over her chest, nodding her thanks. He untied the floof from his belt and handed it to her. She stared at it for several eternal moments.

“E-Excalibur...what is this?” Saryn questioned, sounding close to tears.

He clenched his fists, scrambling for his explanation, and settling for what he told Biz. “A reminder.”

She continued to stare at it in silence, no words coming to mind for what she felt. 

“Thinking about what you said, and it made me think. Tyl’s risking a lot to be with you. He must love you, and you love him. A lot, and I thought that maybe...since I don’t think bringing him here is an option...if you could have some kind of reminder, something to prompt your memory of him, then maybe you’d try and fight this...if only for his sake. I don’t know about him, but if Wisp was Infested, I’d want her to be cured more than anything. I’d wager he feels, or would feel the same if he knew.”

Saryn looked from him, to the floof, and back again, trying to hold back the sobs building in her throat. She hugged it tightly, clutching it to her chest, unable to speak. 

“I thought it might...help. You, I mean.” He looked down, not sure of what else to say. 

“T-thank you.” she whispered, genuinely unsure of what else to say. It was a gesture so kind it left her reeling, not sure of what to think. As much as she hated to admit it, Excalibur was right on the mark, at least towards her feelings. She missed Tyl, missed him and everything about him, and she desperately wanted to see him again, even if she felt this disgusting and unworthy of his love.

“It was no trouble at all.” 

“C-could you leave me untied? Just this once? I want to hold him for a while.”she turned to face him, as best she could, and he nodded. 

“Yeah, that’s not a problem. If Alad has a problem with it, tell him it was me.” 

“I won’t rat you out like that...not after something like this.”

“Alright.” He took a deep breath. “I hope he doesn’t cause you too much trouble, then.” 

“It’s worth it.” she said, barely audible, the floof’s face pressed to her own.

Excalibur nodded slowly. “I’ll leave you be, then.” He turned to leave. Before he could, Saryn spoke up again. 

“H-hey, I-” She cut off, shaking her head. “Thank you,” she said, simply. 

“You’re welcome,” he replied quietly, then quickly took his leave.

Saryn hugged the floof to her chest, wishing she could go to Tyl, wanting to disappear into his arms, so much it hurt. But, as she couldn’t do that, this was the next best thing, and so she treasured it with the whole of her being. As painful as it was to be there right now, Excalibur’s gift had made it bearable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If there's a dip in quality, it's because we still haven't found a new beta reader. Sorry.


	32. For Which There is a Cure, and For Which There is None

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Getting better and worse

Saryn was spending most of the next few days high off her ass due to the mix of painkillers and sleeping meds Alad was keeping her hopped up on, which was just fine with him. It let him focus on the task at hand without having her scream in agony. The worst she did on her little drug cocktail was ramble occasionally in her sleep, and while it was weird, it didn’t sound like she was being murdered in cold blood.

As for the cure, deconstruction of the Infestation biology was probably some of the most fun he’d had in ages, and it would be even more so if he wasn’t stuck working with the most unbearable Grineer in the System. He sighed. _Something was better than nothing_ , he thought, drumming his fingers on his desk, thinking back to his betrayal at the hands of his own daughter. The reaming he’d gotten from Tyl had been spectacular, for lack of a better word, and all he could do was sit there and bear it. If it had been literally anyone else he would’ve tried to be at least _slightly_ professional, but after the incident with Kelpie and Tyl’s cloning tube, the fact that she was casually dating one of his Tubeman (y’know, as you do), and the fact that being professionally passive-aggressive counted as being professional in his book, he was in no way inclined to give Regor an inch.

He would have never caved if not for Kelpie (in her third act of backstabbery he couldn’t quite bring himself to be too furious over) and the Lotus teaming up against him. Kelpie had made the call, then the Lotus had intervened on Kelpie's hopefully _not_ potential father-in-law’s behalf, pointing out he really couldn’t do this alone. The last time he’d dealt with the Infestation (his own, in fact), he’d needed Regor’s help, and that that had been ages ago. Tyl might have resources and knowledge he didn’t (though he doubted it), and the two of them working together could get Saryn cured faster, thus getting her off his back for good (if he was lucky). Worse, Lotus had been willing to allow it. So, he was outvoted. 

Suddenly, Alad looked down to notice Galatea staring up at him, and he realized that he’d been zoned out for some time. Standing, he stretched, his gaze wandering idly around the lab. Regor hadn’t called yet today, and there wasn’t really anything he could do until he did, so he was stuck with being bored until something happened. He scratched his feline companion behind the ear absentmindedly. 

Suddenly, the sound of his communications going off startled him, and he glared over at it before hitting the button. “I’ve been waiting for your call.” Alad said tonelessly.

“Imagine, a Grineer Commander waiting on a Corpus scientist. How ironic.” Before Alad could reply, Tyl continued. “In all seriousness, how is she?” 

“High. Like...she could probably rival Neffy with how, for lack of a better term, stoned she is right now. It’s basically the only way I can keep her sedated, and not screaming bloody murder.”

Tyl inhaled sharply. “Do you remember your own Infestation? It hurts, and I’m surprised you weren’t shrieking like Nef. I didn’t expect much, and yet you still manage to disappoint me. Can you not afford any empathy at all?”

“What else am I supposed to do?” Alad asked, impatience etched in his voice. “You haven’t given me any sort of formula to help her with the pain, so I’ve been left to my own devices. I can’t have her screaming all the time, it’s not healthy for either of us, more importantly me. As for empathy, over my dead body.” He made a dismissive gesture. “That is something she is beneath getting.” 

“The only painkillers the Grineer have are highly addictive, what did you want me to give you?” Tyl’s voice rose in annoyance. “I'm not going to risk her getting hooked on it. Things are already falling down around her, she doesn’t need a drug dependency as well.” Tyl was angry now. “And that’s rich coming from you. What if Kalo had said the same thing and left you to rot?”

“Putting aside the fact she brought all those problems on herself? She's the one that went out and found the Infestation, not the other way around!” cried Alad, his temper rising with his voice. “And why would you imply that I didn’t have a plan for getting out of there myself?” Alad stopped and took a deep breath, keeping his temper and tone in check.

Meanwhile, Tyl cracked a grin under his mask. ‘Because I _know_ you didn’t have one,” he said tauntingly. “I know how the Infestation works, seemingly better than you, even though you’re the one that had their tendrils so far up your ass, they could make your mouth move like a sock puppet. They would have wrung you dry if you even started thinking of a plan like that.”

Alad ground his teeth,but decided to change the subject. “Getting back to Saryn, do you have any formulae to contribute, anything at all? She can’t stay drugged on my operating table forever.”

“He asks, knowing he had it stolen from me.”

It took all of Alad’s self control not to disconnect from the Grineer. “I merely obtained it, and it’s the reason I’m still here. _You’re_ the one who developed it, so why not just make it again? Why is that so hard?” 

Tyl sighed. “Maybe because it requires materials that are obscenely difficult to obtain, Salad. Materials, but even more importantly, time, and it won’t work if she gets too far along. You know as well as I do we can’t exactly do a little limb extraction like they did with you, and, by the way, your cybernetics are extremely shoddy work.” 

“You _fucking-_ ” Alad took a deep breath. “Ok fine, how long do you need me to keep your precious from going full blown tentacles?”

The Grinner thought for a moment. “At the absolute earliest, a few weeks, if not a month. The gallium and argon crystals will be the easier bits to get. I also need nitain extract, and I couldn’t get it to work without an Orokin cell.”

Alad blinked in shock. “The _fuck_ do you need an Orokin cell for? What does any of that have to do with curing the Infestation?”

Tyl shrugged, and looked him dead in the eye. “I guess you’re just not on the level needed to comprehend it yet.”

Alad’s eye twitched _“What?!_ ” 

Tyl smiled sickeningly “If you have to ask, I suppose that tells you everything you need to know.” Alad heard him say something to someone, but it was too quiet to understand. “I’ll get you the cure as soon as I am able. Until then, keep her stable, and I’ll call periodically to check up on her.” 

Tyl ended the call and Alad slumped in his seat, groaning. “Please kill me now.”

“What was that?” Michi called from another room.

“I said kill me now! If I have to work one more day with Tyl or Saryn I’m going to flip.”

After a moment, she walked up behind him, putting her arms around him protectively. “Things will be fine, you’ve just had a hard day.” 

“You can say that again...how long do I have to sit here rolling with Tyl’s punches? I could be doing any number of more useful things.” He took a deep breath, letting it out in a long sigh. “Kelpie wants to be away from here as much as she can since Saryn is here. Although it’s more likely her screaming is the problem. I don’t blame her.” 

“You’ll get through this.” Michi said gently, patting him on the head.

Alad sighed. “Maybe, yes, but how many scars will I have before my efforts are completed?” 

“You’ll be fine. I don’t think Saryn wants to cut you up, despite how unkind you’ve been.”

“It’s not like she doesn’t deserve it. Putting the whole of the Tenno in danger like this, she’s lucky she’s not dead.” He sat down, resting his chin on his chest. “Maybe that would have been for the best,” he said, his tone unusually weary. 

“I know you hate her, and you have every right in the System to hate her but just...try and think. You heard what she told you. She had a reason for this.”

“I know, I just…” He trailed off. 

Michi rubbed his shoulder reassuringly. “Besides, she’s had just as hard a time as you have, if not worse. Remember when you were first getting situated here?”

He nodded slowly. “It seemed like Valkyr hated me more than everyone else combined. Scratch that, she _did_ hate me, and I suppose if I looked at it from that angle I could understand. But I feel no obligation to give her an inch when she never spared Kelpie the same mercy. This is karma, pure and simple. Maybe one day those feelings will change, but for now? Not a chance. At least I tried to atone. She went and got with Tyl Regor.” 

“She went and got with someone who genuinely cares about her,” Michi said quietly. “You can’t honestly blame her for that.” 

Alad said nothing, merely nodded resignedly. Michi gave him a kiss on the cheek before returning to what she’d been doing, giving Alad room to think his thoughts. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Staring up at the ceiling, and judging he might as well give up trying to sleep, the System’s most disgruntled ex-Corpus rolled out of bed, pulled on his coat, and decided to try and do something productive.

Funny how listening to a Warframe talk to herself can throw a curveball into a plan like that.

Much as he told himself he didn’t need to check on Saryn, that she was _fine_ , he still felt compelled to. He didn’t know why. There had been a noticeable slowing in the Infested growth on her from day to day, so clearly Excalibur’s...gift had worked, and she probably wouldn’t need anything cut until tomorrow. Still, maybe he should check. Just in case she was screwing something else up.

He knocked on her door, giving her a moment before entering. A few feet in and he heard her murmuring to herself, the floof clasped to her chest as always. He had decided to leave her hands unbound thanks to some very heavy convincing on Michi’s part, so naturally Saryn was stroking the back of its head like something far more valuable than it actually was. _You’re being surprisingly noisy for someone who’s supposed to be sleeping,_ he thought, stepping quietly.

Moving closer, he could hear her whispering to the floof, her voice surprisingly soft and tender. “I’m sorry, Tyl...I should have told you, said something, instead of being strapped down to a table in Alad’s lab.” she said quietly. “I felt like things would be better off without me in the equation, things would run smoother without me in the way to mess things up.” she gave a small, choked laugh. “Look how well that turned out. I’m not even brave enough to take my helmet off and lean my head on the barrel of my Tigris prime, give you some peace, so now I’ll come crawling back to you like some kind of curse, once this is all over.”

Alad stayed silent, not daring to interrupt her. Even though he’d made his feelings clear regarding her, something in her words, the way she spoke, gave him pause. 

“My fault. All my fault,” she continued. “Everything bad that’s happened over these last several months…” She stopped. “I’m not even sure how long it’s exactly been. The days have blurred together in an incohesive mess, and time doesn’t really seem to mean anything anymore. I’m sorry that I’ll be coming on all fours back into your life soon. Maybe I shouldn’t, but I don’t know if I can keep myself from doing it.” she stroked the back of the floof’s head.

Alad wanted to disagree, wanted to say that she shouldn’t go back to him, that it made her look like a traitorous whore, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak up.

“I wonder if you’d understand...my reasons. Or justifications.” There was a pause, as she fell silent. “I...I really miss you, a lot,” she added quietly, hugging the floof as tightly to her chest as she could. “Please, forgive me. For everything. You’re the only one who would even consider it. I told you about the last time I tried. It went poorly, and I ran away instead of facing it with some kind of grace. I’m really pathetic, aren’t I?” 

There was a longer silence, before Alad heard a new sound, unfamiliar to him at first. He took a glance around, not seeing anything out of place, and almost went to walk into Saryn’s room before he finally realized what it was: it was the gasping breath one draws when they are desperately trying to push down the sobs building in their throat.

He pulled back, feeling awkward for having heard. He hesitated, unsure whether he should stay or leave. 

“Fuck, I miss you.” 

He peered around the corner to see her on her side, curled around the floof as much as her bound legs would allow, her limbs trembling slightly as her chest heaved with the weight of her emotions. 

“I’m sorry. If that-if it means anything.” She sniffled, gasping another sob out. “I-I just want the pain to end.” 

Alad took a deep breath, feeling completely out of place. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, he was feeling a bit sorry for her, and resolved to push those feelings down. Whatever remorse she felt now didn’t make up for what she did. Right?

He shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. 

“I...what have I done?” she whispered, shaking her head. “With myself. With everyone. How do I keep living with myself now?” Unable to hold back her tears any longer, her sobs broke free, and she wept, for herself, for what she’d done, for Tyl, the kind of bitter, ugly crying you do when nothing else seems to be getting your feelings out, the kind that sticks in your throat and makes you feel like you’ll choke from the pressure of your own despair.

Alad looked at the floor, feeling ashamed, despite his best efforts. Her words had gotten to him, piercing his ironclad justifications for despising her to the extent he did. Watching her shudder and wail silently, he considered knocking her out. It’d be a mercy, for sure. 

But something about it didn’t feel right. Yes, she was hurting, but...he couldn’t bring himself to put her under because of it. Instead, she should have the chance to work through her emotions, feel them. 

It was just karma.

He let out a sigh, and turned, heading back to his bed. Once there, he laid awake for quite some time, staring into the blackness, listening to the occasional sound from the direction of Saryn’s room, wondering what exactly he’d gotten himself into. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had taken far too long for Alad’s liking, but finally, _finally_ , the thrice damned cure was done. All he had to do now was give it to her and he could be rid of Tyl for good. If he ever had to work with the ornery Grineer scientist again, he’d eat both his prosthetic legs.

He really had to wonder what Kelpie saw in him that made her think he was so tolerable. He wondered what Saryn saw in him that made her love him. He let out a deep breath, and put his thoughts out of his mind for the moment. He had work to do. Tyl had finally finished the antidote, with Alad refining it a bit before it was fully produced and ready.

He stared at the canister like it was an Infested maggot crawling on his hand. He still held a vehement hatred of Saryn, but...he couldn’t get her words out of his mind. 

_I miss you._

The way she’d said it, just three simple words strung together probably hundreds of times in a single 24-hour period, just the way she’d said it had made him think of a ghost. Some lost spirit who couldn’t move on and watched her loved one from limbo. Was that how she’d been feeling this whole time? He didn’t know her well enough to make that call, but it still nagged him, and he didn’t like the fact his hatred for her seemed to be softening a bit.

He shook himself from his reverie with a sigh, turning back to his work table. Opening the container, he filled a large syringe half-full with the liquid and walked over to Saryn’s unconscious, sleeping form. She looked more peaceful there than she ever had in the time he’d known her. He took the large needle, and with considerable force, shoved the sharp end into the spot where a tendril has previously burrowed into her neck, pushing the plunger down. It went about as smoothly as it could, about as smoothly as any injection could really. It found her vein with surprising ease and nothing was rejected. It seemed almost too easy, for the gravity of the situation. 

And waited. 

He’d half expected some sort of convulsions to start, or she’d wake up immediately, something along that line. Sure, he’d been Infested himself, but she was completely different from him in what made up her body now, and there was no way for him to predict the outcome. But nothing happened. She continued to lay there, as tranquil as before. He took a moment to measure her vitals; her breathing was normal, heart rate steady. For now, he surmised, all she needed was more sleep, and to let her medicine do its work to clean the Infestation out of her system.

It would take a while, as he would come to find out. Even with her newfound will to live, the Infestation did not want to give up such a lucrative weapon like her, and for a few weeks he’d spend an hour or two watching her, the new growths shriveling and falling off at sooner and sooner intervals. It was like watching a time lapse of a plant’s life. Growing and wilting, the old ones slowly, so slowly succumbing to the poison that would ultimately save the host’s life.

Finally, after what had felt like an eternity, although it had only been a couple months, her blood came back clean and her body hadn’t been growing anything new for over two weeks. She was cured, albeit unwilling to do much yet but sleep. He had cured her Infestation, if not the bigger problem she had. For that, there might not even be a cure

Alad felt his emotions conflicting again and shook his head. No, he was only happy because she was going to be out of his, and more importantly, Kelpie’s, hair. He didn’t care that she would survive, and that she could go back to her Grineer. She could stay miserable for all he cared.

Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to our lovely new beta readers YourNeighbor and TheDiamondFox


	33. The Wolfsbane's Roots

“Saryn.”

She lifted her head groggily to Alad shaking her awake, more gentle than she would have expected from him. She was a bit stiff but still rather comfortable, and getting up was not something she was in the mood for. Her sleep had been deep and dreamless ever since she’d come here, and it had been wonderful to not see the Witch or the Moth whenever she tried to rest.

“Yegh?” she replied, still trying to pry her eyes open.

“Your Infestation doesn’t seem to have surged in any way, so you're free to go.” he said, straight to the point, but shockingly polite.

“You sure?” she asked, blinking in the light of the lab. 

“Yes,” he said, nodding in affirmation. “I’ll give Regor one thing: he knows how to cure the Infestation.” 

“I guess he does. I’ll have to come back and get whatever you were giving me to keep me sedated. I haven’t slept so long without those awful dreams in ages.” She sat up and stretched, trying to keep her distance from him without seeming rude. He hated her, she knew that, and she was just being accommodating. 

“It’s a tad too addictive for me to give out freely.” he said carefully. 

Sighing, she gave a defeated nod and stood up. “It was worth asking, I guess. Thank you for fixing the mess I made myself into.”

After a moment, Alad gave her an awkward nod. “The Lotus will be happy with your recovery, I’m sure.” A silence stretched between them, and what he hadn’t said was clear: he still loathed her existence, but he could refrain from his usual dickery. 

Not knowing what else to say, she dismissed herself and stepped out into the relay, a bit disappointed. She had almost hoped for a moment Alad’s icy demeanor towards her had started to crack a bit. No such luck. Oh well.

Here she was. Out. Healed. Completely cured of her Infestation. For every step she took forward, it seemed someone was there to take her four steps back. For a brief moment, she entertained the notion of going back to the Infested, but then she pushed the thought from her mind. That ship had sailed, and sunk. No point in trying again. She would only be rescued again, and besides, the pain hadn’t been worth it on either front. That left her with one option, and the one she was best at. Shutting down completely. Nothing could hurt her if she couldn’t feel. 

Of course, that would mean not saying anything to Tyl. On one hand, now that she had been unceremoniously shoved out of Alad’s door, she was free to run into his arms. But something nagged her everytime she tried to get excited about it. She felt icky, unclean. Definitely didn’t feel like she was even worthy to be in his presence. Who knows? Maybe he didn’t even want to see her anymore. She wouldn’t blame him one bit. It was probably better for her to stay away. Far away, although she’d miss him so.

But she couldn’t let anybody see her missing him, and give them emotional ammunition to use against her. Lotus knew they already had enough of  _ that.  _ Any display of emotion could be used against her, could be a weakness. She didn’t enjoy the thought of changing to adapt to this circumstance, but didn’t see another way to keep surviving in her present state. Especially without Tyl. She wondered what he was up to now, and hoped he was ok. She only wanted the best for her dearly beloved.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Saryn’s only been out for a day and she’s already acting strange.” Excalibur noted sadly to his teammates.

“What’s she doing?” Valkyr asked, becoming attentive and sitting up.

“I tried talking with her, and...well…”

_ Excalibur was surprised at himself. He was genuinely happy to see Saryn out and about. Sure, he didn’t know her very well, but after giving her the floof, he felt they had connected a bit, and he was eager to continue to remedy his mistake of not reaching out earlier. What he hadn’t expected was… coldness. She had seemed closed off, her hands clutching her forearms in a defensive posture. Her demeanor had changed into one of guarded apprehension. Despite this, she had brushed him off rather brusquely, as if his presence invoked massive pain. It startled him, and his attempts to pursue the matter were met with cold impassiveness.  _

_ “Saryn!” he’d called out to her, concerned. _

_ “Yeah?” she asked. Her voice was so devoid of emotion, of  _ life,  _ that if it had a color, it would be grey. Dull, flat, motone, like she’d locked all her feelings away in a chest somewhere.  _

_ “Are you okay?”  _

_ “I’m fine.” she’d said dismissively, turning away.  _

_ “A-are you sure? You seem-”  _

_ “I’m fine.”  _

He shook his head fiercely, trying to rearrange his thoughts and get back into the conversation at hand when he noticed Oberon, Valkyr, and Loki staring at him. “Sorry, zoned out for a bit. She’s gotten...very frosty. Absolutely frigid is a better term, actually.”

Oberon thought for a moment. “Maybe she just needs time to get reoriented. Having gone through what she did, I can’t say that I blame her for being that way.” 

“I doubt it will be that simple.” Loki said, gently draping an arm around Valkyr. She leaned her head on his shoulder, purring.

“I agree.” she spoke up. “People won’t start being nice to her just because she got Infested.”

“I was being optimistic,” Oberon hedged, nodding at the pair. “I still hold out hope that she’ll make a full recovery, both physically and mentally.” 

“Not if the judges have anything to say about it.” Loki said, jabbing at the collective of their comrades milling around the relay.

Oberon sighed. “You should try being more positive, Loki. It might do you some good.” 

“I’m not being negative, I’m being realistic.” he replied. “Kelpie is, at best, conflicted, and most of the others still think she’s scum.” 

“She’s not though. She’s just had a hard time with things.” Excalibur interjected. 

“I’m not denying that, but then, I never had any personal conflicts with her, so I don’t carry the same seething hatred of her.” 

“Loki’s right. Most of us don’t know enough to be able to fully understand where she’s coming from.” Oberon let out a deep breath. “Myself included. It’s strange, actually, that I fought with her for so long but know barely anything about her.” 

“She holds her secrets tightly.” Valkyr mused. 

“I can’t blame her.” Loki added.

Excalibur began pacing back and forth, concerned. “There has to be something we can do to help her, right?” 

“I think only time and her actions can really do anything now.” Oberon said. Excalibur hung his head.

“Dammit.”

Oberon patted him on the shoulder. “No matter what, you can’t help everyone. Trust me, I know. You try your best, but sometimes, it hurts more than helps.” He paused, remembering Xaku.

“I want to help her more, though. There must be  _ something, anything. _ ”

“We’ll do what we can, but she has her freedom to choose. You can’t make her be happy, and I wouldn’t force anyone to be.” he told him gently.

“She’s not choosing to be unhappy, Oberon. Nobody chooses that.”

Oberon took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “Would that I could still believe that.” 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tyl felt like he was being choked, and it took him a few moments to realize the feeling of being on the verge of tears. Saryn was better, but not doing well. 

He missed her immensely. 

She hadn’t responded to any of his messages, let alone calls. It was like she was actively trying to stay away from him, and he couldn’t figure out why. Maybe she just needed time, to collect herself, or whatever it was. He was worried about her, regardless of the reason, and wanted her back, back and safe with him. It was like a chain around his heart being pulled tighter the longer she was gone. This was a new feeling. Of course, his romance with Saryn was the first he'd had in his life, but the two undeniably had a tight bond. The last time he'd had quiet panic even remotely similar to this was when Danya needed her operations.

But worrying about her wouldn’t get his work done. He would have gone looking for her, but aside from the fact that she was probably at the relay among the other Warframes, he’d been so tied down with responsibilities that he couldn’t get away. And if he could, he still couldn't track her down for fear of risking exposing their relationship.

“Commander!” 

He spun around to see a lancer standing in his doorway. “Yes, soldier?”

“Lich Delgis requested your assistance, sir.” he said, saluting quickly. “Something about a security breach, but she didn’t give me the details.”

"Ah fuck." he hissed under his breath. "Tell her I'm coming."

Two hours later, after having dispatched a massive shark trying to break into a window, or more accurately, bonking itself against the glass and making his men freak, he was back in his lab with nothing to fill his time except brooding. He could easily re-absorb himself into his work, but he felt like letting his emotions have a bit of rein for a while. 

He wanted to speak with Saryn, if only to hear her voice, hear her say that she was okay and just otherwise occupied. He couldn’t force her, and it would be nasty of him to try and push it if all she wanted was time alone, but he couldn’t shake the feeling something was up, just like he could tell if Danya was planning something...less than advisable.

He heard the door open, and turned to see Kuda walking in. “Delgis, how can I help you?”  _ You have awful timing, by the Queens!  _ he thought, just wanting to be alone for now.

“Sir, back there you seemed...kind of distracted. I just wondered if you were alright? Actually, you’ve been rather distant for a while now.” 

“I…” he contemplated telling her. It would be nice to spit some of this out, just get it out of his system. Maybe it could help, even. “I am distracted, yes.” 

“Is something up?” she asked cautiously. It wasn’t really her place to be asking after her higherup’s mental health, but she liked him, and it wouldn’t do for him to fall apart.

He let out a long sigh, giving a nod after a moment. “I’m sure you’ve noted Saryn’s absence around the sealab?” he asked, not looking at her. “It’s been eating me. More so now that she’s been cured, yet I haven’t heard a peep from her.”

After a pause, Kuda cleared her throat. “I’m no expert on Warframes, but maybe she’s trying to sort herself out. You know, just getting back up to speed, or something of the sort.” 

“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell myself. It’s not working.” He leaned over on the table, sighing. “I mean...I just want to know. At the very least, if I knew where she was, and why she wasn’t coming back, I could at least have closure.” 

“That would do it, yeah…how about I try and talk to her for you?”

“Why? What could you accomplish that I couldn’t?”

She took a nervous step forward. “I don’t know, but maybe it’s worth a shot. That’s all I was thinking.” 

“You can try if you think it will help, but I doubt it will.” he said, sitting down and burying his head in his arms.

Kuda wasn’t sure what to do. If he hadn’t been her Commander, she would have stepped forward to comfort him. Being that was the case however, she wasn’t sure how acceptable that would be, so she simply stood there waiting to be dismissed, watching his back and chest start to heave. Unable to help herself, she stepped forward, and gently patted him on the back. 

“T-thank you.”

He propped up his mask a bit, letting his tears fall on the desk, and Kuda turned her head away out of respect. If the Commander ever meant to show his face to her, he’d let her know. He held his sorrow to a few moments, before setting his mask back into place and straightening. “If you hear from her, please don’t hesitate to let me know.” he said, his voice quiet. 

“I will. Promise.”

He nodded his thanks, and she quickly saluted and took her leave. He waited a few moments before taking his mask and helm off completely, letting his bare forehead rest against the cold metal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to our beta readers once again :]


	34. Fanning the Flames

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ember doesn't know when to back off
> 
> Thank you very much to my lovely beta readers YourNeighbor, and TheDiamondFox ! <3

Hildryn was sitting in the relay, polishing her Larkspur. She’d just been through an Infested survival mission, and had returned covered in the general unpleasant gunk that comes with slaying the Infested, not to mention her weapons. She couldn’t let them stay in that condition, so she’d set to cleaning them, even though she’d already done so the previous day, and it gave her an excuse to sit and look for Saryn without coming off as a complete weirdo.

Half an hour later her gun was clean, and there was still no sign of Saryn. After a moment’s deliberation, she decided to go look for her. Having heard about her ordeal and subsequent release from Alad’s lab had concerned her deeply, and she was nervous about Saryn’s state of mind. Sure, their friendship had been an arranged one, but like she’d said before, she genuinely liked Saryn, odd as she was, and felt honor bound to look after her.

It didn’t take her long to spot her, sitting alone by a lotus pond, absentmindedly stroking the petals of one of the snow-white flowers and looking like she’d had the life sucked out of her. Even her colors had been changed, making her shiver just looking at the frigid wash of her armor. Still, she was determined to check up on her.

“Hey Saryn, how are things?” she asked, walking up to her. 

She looked up, the movement slow and forced, like a puppet jerking it’s own strings. “Could be worse.”

Hildryn went to pat her on the shoulder, but pulled her hand back when Saryn shrugged her off. “What’s wrong?” she asked cautiously, keeping a respectful distance. 

“Nothing. Everything’s...normal,” she said tonelessly, stroking the petal of a nearby Lotus flower. 

“I don’t mean to bother you,” Hildryn sighed. “You don’t seem like yourself, is all.”

“I am myself, Hildryn.” she said simply, a hint of morose acceptance seeping into her voice.

“Whatever your normal state is, it’s not this.”

“Why do you care, anyway?” Saryn turned to face her, her voice rising slightly in anger. “I already know about your deal with the Lotus. I already know you don’t actually care.”

“You actually believe that?” Hildryn asked surprisingly. Then she sighed. “Look, at first it was like that, yeah. But as things went on, and we went on more missions together, I got more attached to you. I truly did.” Hildryn sighed again. “We all care about you, even the Lotus.” she asked tiredly

Saryn huffed angrily, looking away. “You know as well as I do that no one cares what happens to me. The Lotus hasn’t lifted a finger to help me throughout all this shit, and I don’t believe she did this for any other reason than to get me out of her hair. She doesn’t care about me. She hasn’t for a very long time.”

“Yes she does!” Hildryn exclaimed.

“Then why hasn’t she tried to help me?” Saryn retorted.

“I...well…” Try as she might, Hildryn couldn’t think of something to say.

“Stop pretending that you care!” Saryn shouted, her voice audibly rising in increasing fury. “If not even the Lotus cares what happens to me, what makes you think you can trick me into believing that you do?”

Hildryn stood there in shock. “Why do you think the Lotus hates you?” she asked quietly, her voice breaking in shock and sorrow. “What has she done to warrant this?”

Saryn exploded in anger. “She fucking abandoned me like this! She became nothing but a gigantic hypocrite! And then she has the _audacity_ to be surprised when I turned elsewhere for companionship to keep my sanity in check?” Saryn was beyond reason now. “Somehow, dear Mother Lotus never saw it coming!” she continued. “Never helped me, but instead expected me to just bend over and take it from everyone who wanted to throw it at me!” she pinned a glare at Ember from across the relay. “Forcing me to sit and take the heat from that _wretched thing_.”

“You can’t seriously be blaming Lotus for this.” cried Hildryn desperately.

Suddenly, it was as if the fire igniting Saryn’s fury was swiftly put out. “I know,” she said, her voice hoarse and broken. “Everything was my fault. I only blame her for not caring, for not offering water when I was being burnt at the stake, but I suppose I can’t even hold that against her. I don’t care about me either. I only wish she hadn’t pretended that she did.”

“And what would you have her do?” Hildryn asked, her own voice rising now to match Saryn’s previous fury. “Just tell the others to stop? That would only make things worse, and you know it.” 

Saryn shook her head, her anger slowly reigniting. “They revere her like a goddess! They listen to her, and even if she didn’t do that, she could have done or said something _to me_. But it doesn’t matter, it’s far too late for anything to be done, and I just have to live with it.” She sighed, her anger washing away again. “Karma’s a bitch.”

Hildryn was silent for a long moment, just staring at Saryn. “Knowing what you’ve said to me previously, I’d be surprised if you’d pick up a call from her.” she said sarcastically. “So don’t go blaming her for that.” 

Saryn glared at her. “Maybe, maybe not. It doesn’t matter at this point. It’s too late.” Saryn simply stared into the pond, defeated. 

“Come on, don’t be like that.” moaned Hildryn. “It’s never too late to change something.” Hildryn reached out again to pat her on the shoulder, but Saryn simply flinched and shied away.

“Don’t we all wish that were true? It’s too late, at least for me.” She lowered her head to stare at her feet. “Too far gone.”

Hildryn thought for a moment. “What if you went to Tyl again?” she asked simply. “I’m sure he’d be happy to have you back.”

Saryn stiffened like she’d been stabbed. “No. I can’t. I can’t do that to him.”

This brought Hildryn up short. “Why not? He probably misses you a lot.”

Saryn glared at her again. “Don't pretend like you know anything about this! He’s better off without me!” she stated, her voice seething with venomous anger.

Hildryn was silent for a long moment, having difficulty understanding why Saryn wouldn’t allow herself to go see him. She wasn’t _allowing_ herself to see him. It made her brain hurt, and as she was chewing through this new piece of the puzzle that was her friend, they got some...somewhat unwelcome company.

“What’s going on?” Ember asked, walking up to them. Hildryn noticed Oberon trailing after her, most likely to make sure she didn’t do anything stupid.

“Oh, hey Ember.” Hildryn lifted a hand in greeting. Saryn visibly stiffened at the sight of her. 

“What’s up?”

“I was just wondering how Saryn’s doing now that she’s out.” she said sardonically.

“Since when did you care?” Saryn hissed, hands twitching like she wanted to reach for her Cyskis.

“ _Maybe_ since you endangered the whole of the Tenno,” she replied with false cheer. “You should have thought about that before doing something so selfish.” 

“Ember.” Oberon said, his tone warning. “Don’t start now.” Translation: Don’t fucking do it.

“Hey, you’re the one who chose to tag along,” she shot back at him

“Only to keep you from putting your foot into your big mouth.” he replied calmly, before turning to Saryn. “Ignore her. How have you been holding up?”

“I’m...surviving. I guess.” she said hollowly before turning away from them, looking at the floor. 

“Ember, if you’re going to be like this, just walk away.” Hildryn said, raising a hand warningly. “You’re not doing anyone any favors.” 

“I’m only here to scout, as it were. Calm down Dryn.” Ember said jovally, quickly backpedaling.

Hildryn huffed. “No, you are here to satisfy your own morbid curiosity,” she stated accusingly. “Don’t pretend otherwise.”

Ember raised her hands in a defensive gesture. “Hey, everyone else has morbid curiosity too, I’m just the only one with the stones to follow through on it.” She gestured at Saryn, who was looking more and more like she wanted to take her hand and tear it off. “I mean..your friend here is the only Warframe to ever willingly Infest herself. That’s a bit strange, isn’t it?”

“You have a very bad habit of inserting yourself into situations that you neither belong in or have the intelligence to comprehend.” Saryn said, her voice quiet and cold.

Everyone stood in shock at the statement Saryn just said.

“Oh?” asked Ember defintly. “And what’s so hard about your little blunder to comprehend, eh?” 

“Maybe it’s the fact that you’ve never been in the mental position that I have, nor had the entirety of your own people hate you.” Saryn said, rounding on her aggressively. 

“Because I’ve never been scummy enough to make everyone despise me.” Ember said tauntingly. She glared at Saryn with sadistic glee. “Listen _‘Ryn_ , just because Alad somehow managed to cure you doesn’t mean we’re all going to go back to pretending you’re not a terrible person, that your attempt to change isn’t unbelievably pathetic, and you’re only trying because you're lonely.” She paused to let the message sink in, before continuing. “Just because you were Infested don't expect any special treatment. If you even think about trying to act like nothing's happened, try to act like you're one of us-" Ember started.

"You'll what?” Interrupted Saryn. “Push me away? Cheat me? Pull out every dirty trick in the book to make me feel disgusting? Maybe even try and get me to solo an Eidolon?” Her voice rose in defiant anger. “Fine, we'll go down to my level, where I'll beat you with experience." Saryn said sadistically.

"Listen here, you Grineer-fucking whore-"

"No no, you listen to _me_ ,” Saryn cried. “The fact of the matter is I've been pushed down so low you have no material to work with. I _know_ how this will go. You'll remember how strong I am, use me when it suits you, because my abilities make missions very convenient, then put me back on my shelf, all while pretending everything is covered, so I don’t catch on to the fact that this new goodwill is a sham, and you all still hate me behind my back!” Saryn’s voice was beyond shouting now, her fury reaching the highest it had been. “That's the most redemption I can expect to receive. All the lies I've told to all of you don't even begin to cover the magnitude of the one you've told me."

Oberon subtly got between the two in preparation of things getting ugly. "What lie would that be?" he asked calmly. He didn’t sound angry, or accusatory, he sounded...concerned, almost.

"That I could change, and all would be forgiven in time." she answered, refusing to remove her piercing glare from Ember’s face.

There was a deep, profound silence as Saryn and Ember stared daggers at each other. 

“I’ve accepted my position,” she said after a while, her rage boiling down. “Either I never get my redemption, or it takes so long I forget I was even trying.” Spent, she sat back down. “I give up. I’m not sure it was even worth trying in the first place, for all it got me.” Her voice was barely above a whisper now.

“It got you Tyl, didn’t it?” Oberon asked quietly. “That has to count for something.”

“It got me him for all of five seconds.” she said dejectedly. “You really think I can just go back now that everyone knows? You think I can just waltz back into his lab after everything that’s happened?” She focused her tired gaze on the healer warframe. “What kind of wretched thing do you think I am, to put that burden on him when I’ve been going around claiming I love him?”

Oberon looked shocked. “Why not?” 

Saryn gave a drained sigh, like this should be obvious. “Thanks to Mag, everyone knows about it now. Do you have any idea the massive risk that would be? My reputation is already beaten bloody and lying unconscious on the floor. Going back to him now would be like filling it with an entire magazine of shotgun rounds. Aside from that, it’s a risk to him. If I could ever claim I loved him, why would I do something so foolish it can’t even be laughed at?”

“If your reputation is already that bad, why do you care?” Ember asked piercingly. 

“For the same reason you keep poking me even though you claim to hate me.” Saryn said tonelessly. “Very deep down, you do care, and it makes you seeth inside, so you put up a front that you _don’t_ care, that you’re just gathering intel, when you really want ammunition. As for me, I’m pretending I don’t care until I _actually_ don't care. If that day ever comes, maybe I’ll finally have the guts to do something about my situation other than curse at the wind. Go back to Tyl, leave the System completely, I don’t know.”

Hildryn put a hand on her arm, trying to calm her down. “Hey, things will work out, alright? It’s not like-”

“Not like _what_ , that I’ll end up a self-inflicted bloody smear like Xaku?” Her voice rose as she continued. “Who are you to say? Who are any of you to say how things will work out?!” 

The others fell silent, looking everywhere in the world but at Saryn. Huffing, she sat back down, her back to the group. “Just...leave me alone. Nothing I say or do matters anymore.” After another moment, she stood up and walked away without another word. 

Hildryn turned to Ember. “Thanks for that, you really helped out,” she said sardonically.

“Hey, you did half of it, at least.” Ember responded piercingly before shrugging indifferently.

“ _At least_ ?!” She leapt up, yelling in Ember’s face. “I’m not the one who showed up just to satisfy my own curiosity! She’s not some spectacle you see on display, she’s a living being! And _now_ , she just might kill herself!” Hildryn held her hand up with full intent of slapping Ember, then thought better of it. Instead, she stalked off in the same direction Saryn had taken. After a moment, Oberon decided to come with, leaving Ember standing there. 

Oberon soon found Hildryn in the launch bay, her eyes staring towards the vacuum of space as a red and white orbiter left the bay.

“Fuck! Missed her.” Hildryn cursed.

“Not for lack of trying,” Oberon sighed. 

“Maybe, but there has to be something we can do for her.” 

“Indeed. The solution, however, is not obvious at this point.”

“What stake do you have in this?” she snapped, then sighed. “Sorry.”  
  
He made a negating gesture with his left hand. “It’s okay. I was with her nearly 24/7 for a while. It gave me some perspective on her, let’s say. I definitely can’t speak for anyone else but myself, but I pity her.” 

Hildryn looked over at him, about to say something when he continued. 

“However much evil she did, nobody deserves that kind of pain. The Infestation is a horror, and...I feel like maybe she’s had enough punishment. I should have done a better job of controlling Ember, but I honestly didn’t think she’d overstepped a line just yet, and...I confess, I was curious as well.” 

Hildryn was silent for a moment. “She can’t get just a single moment’s peace, can she?” she asked, her voice quiet.

“No, but then, that’s typical for us Warframes.” He put a hand on her shoulder. “You’re doing your best.”

“And it’s not good enough.”

He put his arm around her shoulders, and they just stood for a while, trying to make sense of it all.


	35. A Cry in the Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Weakening a little
> 
> Thank you to my lovely beta readers <3

It was very strange, how something that had originally been so hellish had become so completely normal and acceptable.

The Orokin hall of her nightmares was even more decayed now, the walls a pale grey, the gold dull and even starting to flake a bit. In the past it would have inspired unbridled fear.

Now she couldn’t care less.

She kept silent as the Witch did what she’d always done, not batting an eye or opening her mouth. It was like she couldn’t be bothered to care. She looked around for the Witch’s white companion, but she was strangely absent. The bones slowly piled up, her tormentor becoming more and more agitated at the fact that Saryn wasn’t reacting in the least bit. 

_ “You’re going to die if this keeps up, and you’re not even twitching.”  _ she said, grinding her teeth wrathfully.

Saryn merely shrugged as much as she could. The Witch growled, raising the tongs to hit her. But just then, she was interrupted by a voice behind her. 

“ _ You can’t seriously expect her to keep being scared of you after this long. _ ” the Moth hissed, almost painfully pale against the darkness.

The Witch turned around to face her, tongs dropping to the floor. “ _ So, now you finally decide to show up? _ ” she snarled. 

The Moth gave an almost casual shrug, but the rest of her was tense and angry.  _ “Your little binding didn’t manage to hold tight enough, so here I am. Someone has to try and stop you, after all, since  _ she  _ clearly won’t even try.” _

__ _ “Stop me? You?”  _ The Witch gave a bitter laugh.  _ “You couldn’t bring yourself to even touch her before, and now you’re  _ standing up _ for her? What went wrong in that little head of yours?”  _

__ The Moth crossed her arms, standing up straight.  _ “I’m tired of sitting and cowering in the corner, and I’m tired of letting you get away with your evil. I thought you’d be gone since she decided she didn’t want to be you anymore, but no, you’re still kicking, and now I have to rein you in before you do anymore damage.”  _ She leaned forward, putting her hands behind her back. _ " _ That’s _ why I’m here, I know that now.” _

__ The Witch bent down, retrieving the tongs from off the floor.  _ “You won’t be here for much longer if you keep this up,”  _ she threatened, clenching her jaw.

_ “You can’t kill me, and I can’t kill you, did you forget that?”  _ she paused for a moment, thinking.  _ “No, is  _ that  _ your plan? Rot her from the inside out until only you’re left or she goes completely mad? Is that it?” _

__ _ “Your mind is too small and limited to even begin to comprehend what my plan is!”  _ the Witch shrieked, brandishing the tongs. 

_ “Or do you not have  _ any  _ plan and you’re just here to be as self-destructive as possible because you think you deserve it?”  _ the Moth countered, taking a step towards her.  _ “You’re breaking yourself from the inside because you can, because you want to. That’s it, isn’t it?” _

Screaming in frustration, the Witch swung the tongs at Moth, hitting her across the face. She flinched backwards, stumbling a bit. 

_ “I’m right, aren’t I?” _ Moth said, touching her fingers to her face only to see them come away crimson, her gauzy white veil stained the same.  _ “You want to tear yourself to shreds because you feel it will help pay for damages.” _

_“No, you’re not! You know nothing, you wretched thing!”_ the shadow-faced wraith yowled, blood from the crack on her forehead dripping down both sides of her face. She blanched. _“H-how?”_

Moth stared for a moment, then gave a bitter smile.  _ “You can’t harm me without hurting yourself.”  _

_ “Why are you fighting so hard hard for her? You know we could just end this now, and not have to deal with anything anymore? She- _ we  _ can’t be saved, so how do you still believe there’s hope?” _

_ “You don’t mean to just let it go,”  _ Moth said, eyes narrowing.  _ “You mean to finish what you started, and I’m not going to let that happen.” _

_ “It’s too late to stop anything anyway, so we might as well not leave the job half finished.”  _ The Witch angrily gestured at the form of Saryn behind them. _ “I mean, if I do leave her alone, she’ll just be a half broken little thing, and I don’t see how that’s any better.”  _ she replied, angrily kicking a rib across the dull, dirty gold floor.

_ “At least she’ll still have some semblance of herself,” _ Moth retaliated.  _ “Which is better than nothing at all.” _

_ “Herself, technically, is you, and she hasn’t resembled you in so long that I don’t think she even remembers anymore.”  _ Witch shook her head angrily. _ “There’s no going back, No redeeming, no fixing this mess. It’s better to just end it here, to go mad and never have to think about all our sins ever again." _

_ “That’s not going to help anything! Dying will not fix anything, and neither will driving yourself insane! What would the others think?” _

_ “The others don’t care!”  _ Witch’s anger was sparked again, and she brandished her tongs again, but Moth caught her hand and looked her dead in the eyes.

_ “What about Tyl?”  _ she asked pointedly.

The Witch froze like a deer in headlights, and for a split second the shadow wreathing her face flickered, showing harsh, jagged lines before disappearing back under a tide of darkness.

Upon hearing that name, Saryn decided she really didn’t want to stick around for the rest of this conversation.  _ Wake up, wake up, this is just a dream, only a dream, WAKE UP! _

_ Wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up _

_ wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up _

_ wake up _

Saryn bolted upright with a screech, her limbs flailing and scrabbling for purchase before she finally calmed down, her chest heaving and fear-sweat dripping down her face. She looked around her orbiter, the lights dimmed so she could get some actual rest without being disturbed, and sighed.

She has a lot to think about.

She pulled the floof of Tyl close to her, having kicked it away when she woke up, and curled up around it, clutching it tightly. She’d never truly considered the  _ why  _ of her nightmares until now. Was her old, snow white self right? Was she the one controlling the shade and doing this to herself, just because she could, and felt she had to? The root cause, was once again her, and while she didn’t understand all of it, she did know one thing:

_ I don’t want to be like her anymore. _

__ It didn’t matter who or what had made the wraith. It didn’t matter where she came from or what her true goal was. All Saryn knew was that it was her worst aspects personified, and she didn’t want to be associated with that anymore. That would mean shrugging off the grey, cloudy blanket of pure apathy she’d been wrapping herself in, kicking herself into gear, and ending her ouroboros cycle of pain.

Fine, so be it.

She would do it, dammit. She would.

She mopped her face with a rag and stood up to stretch, letting her pounding heart return to normal. Taking a deep breath, she looked around her Orbiter and spotted Snowball lying on the floor close by. He flicked an ear and padded up to her, rubbing himself against her leg and purring loudly, happy to see her. She lifted him up gently.

“Hey kitty. Been a while, hasn’t it?”

He bonked his forehead against her and mrewed, blinking his lovely yellow eyes. She rubbed behind his ears, under his chin, and along his chest. She sat on the floor, and Snowball immediately crawled up beside her, putting his head in her lap, and she ran her fingers through his snowy fur. His purrs had a calming effect on her, and soon enough she was in a better mood, even grabbing his brush off a shelf and working out the tangles in his fluff.

Despite having a somewhat clear (well, clear _ er _ ) picture of herself, some things were still murky, and while she brushed Snowball and listened to his bone rattling purrs, she was deep in thought.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tyl’s metal fingers practically bounced as he drummed them on the desk, his eyes narrowed and his whole frame looking rather tense. His worry about Saryn was coiling him tighter and tighter with each passing day she was missing, to the point he was checking reports from his colleagues and even ones snatched from the Corpus for any leads. The results had been disappointing thus far, and it was starting to grate on him.

He sighed, berating himself silently for not thinking of something, anything he could have said or done to have prevented all of this. Danya seemed completely oblivious to all of it, just happy to be perching on his lap while he absentmindedly stroked her head. 

“Dagh, are you okay?”

He looked down at her, meeting her eyes, wide in worry. “What makes you think something’s wrong?” 

“You’re acting funny.” she said simply, reaching up to pat him on the shoulder.

He tried to smile, but it felt...strange. Sickly. Wrong, almost. “I’m sure things will work out, Danya.” 

“You sure, Dagh? You miss Saryn, don’t you?” she asked innocently, her voice soft.

He sighed, nodding after a moment. “Is it that easy to tell?” 

“Yeah. You’re all...droopy.”

“Yeah, I suppose your Dagh is feeling a bit droopy.” he said, patting her on the head.

“Oh Dagh!” Danya pouted under her helmet, hugging him tightly around the waist. Her arms didn’t even reach around him halfway.

He stroked her back. “I’ll be okay, Dany. Don’t worry, I’m sure Saryn’s fine.”

“If you don’t know where she is, why don’t you just go look for her?” she asked, looking up at him. 

He opened his mouth to reply, then hesitated. He was, if not the most intelligent person in the System, at least in the top three, and yet somehow, s _ omehow _ , he’d never thought of that. Danya, with her childish-ness, had just laid out the simplest and probably the most effective solution right in front of his face.  _ Danya. _

He gave a genuine smile under his mask. “I’ll do that, Dany. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome Dagh.” she said happily, snuggling up against him like a kavat kitten, and he stroked the back of her head, feeling the familiar twinge of sadness that always came along with moments like this. “Will you leave right away?” she asked quietly.

“No. I’ll stay with you a little longer, don’t worry.” He asked, pulling her a bit closer.

She let out a giddy squeal, hugging him tightly. “Thank you, Dagh!” 

“Anything for you little one.”

They stayed like that for a long while, Tyl trying to keep his mind off everything that was troubling him for at least a small amount of time. Danya eventually fell asleep, and he let her rest against him for a bit, brushing her head with his fingertips and watching her back gently rise and fall before putting her to bed.

Which gave him ample time to pace a trench in the floor, laying plans to go after Saryn.


	36. What is Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Girlfriend Quest™️ start

Lua was as cold and unwelcoming as usual, but the effect seemed...neutralized somewhat by memories. The empty, broken halls didn’t seem quite as foreboding when Tyl had spent so much time with Saryn in them, stripping back the effect of the unease they could generate.

Surprisingly, all was quiet as he walked the corridors, there being no corrupted units to be seen anywhere, let alone anyone else. He let out a defeated sigh. 

_ Another dead end _ , he thought to himself. Seems the Orokin enjoyed making mazes with enough gold to sear your eyes as much as they liked making things that would come around to bite them in their collective asses later.

As he turned back the way he’d come, he thought he heard notes in the distance. The sound triggered a memory, one of Saryn and himself completing a music puzzle. It felt like that had happened years ago, with all the junk that had followed, when in reality it had been months. Still a long time, but it felt far longer than it should have.

Unable to help himself, he moved onward, searching for the puzzle. It was more elusive than he remembered, and took a while to find, but eventually he found the tell-tale pale blue lamps that marked the entrance to the puzzle room. He hesitated for a moment, then stepped inside. 

It was just like he’d remembered it: white and gold like every other Orokin structure, the large column in the center with the odd, luminescent branches coming out of it like pipes, and the three ledges that held the panels that played those beautiful, haunting notes when you stepped on them. That was something he’d never forget, nor the day he spent with her.

He stood there for some minutes, wishing Saryn was here with him. It felt like someone had turned all his memories of his time with her into bricks and was actively throwing them into his bare face. He lapsed into a set of thoughts so familiar by now that they’d worn grooves in his head. He should have done something, said something. He should have never let her leave that day. Just a slow turning of regrets like some interesting pebble found on the beach.

Suddenly, he heard a succession of notes come from a platform above him, shaking his mind out of the ruts in his head. He stood stock-still for a moment, the realization that he wasn’t here alone hitting him like a sledgehammer. Gathering himself, he cautiously walked up the flights of stairs to the upper balcony, hoping against hope that he’d see her…

“Excalibur, you klutz!” 

The scientist sighed. No, no that wasn’t her. 

He turned to leave, feeling wholly defeated. Before he went two steps, however, it occurred to him that the frames might know where he might find Saryn. He decided that there was nothing to be lost by asking. He turned to leave, tip-toeing carefully so as not to be detected by the Tenno. Nonetheless, his mighty armor clanged rather somewhat noticeably. Tyl cursed himself, wishing he had gotten a better idea of where he could potentially teleport to.

“I know I shouldn’t step on them, but they sound really nice.” Excalibur said quietly, looking sheepish.   
  
“Yeah they do.” Hildryn agreed. “Actually...they sound a lot like Octavia. Her voice, I mean.”

He nodded. “I wish I could catch her singing more. Wait...you think this is her? Like a recording?”

“Maybe.” Hildryn said, putting a hand on her chin thoughtfully. She would have continued had she not noticed a large Grineer trying (somewhat noisily) and failing to extract himself. For someone who could be downright graceful in combat, he was no escape artist.

“Regor!” Excalibur shouted in surprise, pulling out his Exalted Blade. Hildryn pulled him back while Tyl rapidly backpedaled, attaching Ack to his right arm.   
  
“Whoah there ‘Scally, don’t jump the gun.” she warned, crossing her fingers and desperately hoping this didn’t come to blows. He reluctantly shoved his sword back into his palm, the room darkening a bit without it’s vibrant blue glow.

Luckily, Tyl seemed to feel the same way, reattaching his hand once the Exalted weapon was out of sight. “It seems there’s been a misunderstanding.” 

“It would seem so,” Hildryn said warily, keeping her Larkspurr close. 

“Explain what you’re doing here then.” Excalibur said, trying to keep the hostility out of his voice and failing. “And you don’t call me Scally!”   
  
“Why me? Since when did you own Lua?” He spat.   
  
“Since when did you come here in the first place?” Excalibur retorted.

Hildryn facepalmed. “Gents, please. Lua is neutral territory.” She paused to consider. “I think, anyway.” she shook her head. “That doesn’t matter right now. If you’re not here for us, why are you here?”

“I’m here for Saryn.” Tyl said simply. 

The two frames looked at each other, lost for words. Finally, Excalibur broke the silence. “Why here?”

Tyl sighed. “Because I’ve been all over the system, that’s why. This is one of the few places I haven’t yet checked.”    
  
“So...you do care about her, then?”

“Yes.” He replied, voice frigid. “I do, and I never stopped.” 

“Uh…”

“Excalibur, shut up. Your foot is wedged deep enough in your mouth as it is.” She chastised, then turned to Tyl. “Saryn hasn’t said anything to you at all?”

“I’ve received no messages, calls, or anything to indicate that she’s alright. As far as I’m concerned, she’s missing in action.” 

“She’s alive. As for ok...how loose of a definition do you accept?” she asked slowly.

“Oh no.” He slumped, gaze moving to the floor. After a moment, he moved to a pillar and put his back against it. “Just give it to me straight. I’d rather know than not.” 

Hildryn took a deep breath. “Okay...her body is alive and well, and physically speaking she is in excellent shape, especially since she’s just come off the heels of being badly Infested. However, the same can’t be said of her emotional state, not by a long shot.” She paused for a moment before continuing, sadness creeping into her voice. “She’s withdrawn, cold even. She doesn’t respond to messages, and it appears that she couldn’t care less about much of anything.”

Tyl took a deep breath, then another. Suddenly, he turned and smashed his fist into the pillar, leaving a web of cracks across its surface. “I should have been there for her,” he said quietly. “And I should have never let you all poison her the way you did.”

“ _ Us? _ Aren’t you aware of what she did? Look, I feel bad for her too, but she’s not completely innocent here!” Hildryn exploded. “She nearly got Kelpie killed!”

“I assure you, I’m  _ fully  _ aware of that.” He looked up at him, unmoved. “Is your little band of half-cracked rebels aware that she’s repentant and has been so  _ for over a year now with nothing to show for it? _ Nothing except an Infestation and a slap in the face. For trying to do what you’ve all wanted for her to.”

Excalibur kept his mouth shut, even nodding in agreement. Hildryn, however, didn’t. 

“You are aware that she made her own choice?” 

Tyl stood and walked over to her, his masked face inches away from Hildryn’s. “Are  _ you _ aware that the Warframes as a whole are doing exactly the same thing to her as she did to Kelpie? Or are you too blinded by your own ignorance to see that? The choice she made was to better herself, and as far as she has been shown, it’s not working, let alone not worth it.” He turned, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “You are doing the exact same thing as she did, and arguably the effect has been worse because Kelpie had more of you on her side. As far as I'm aware, up until she got Infested she only had Hildryn, who was made to do it by the Lotus in the first place.” He leveled a finger at her. “She is  _ more _ isolated than Kelpie, and she hasn’t even hit her cut off point yet. Your  _ genius _ decision making has birthed side effects that I bet you didn’t even know about.”

Hildryn was completely lost for words. After a brief moment, she turned away and crossed her arms, her gaze on the floor.

Excalibur cleared his throat. “If you like, we can take you to her.” 

Hildryn suddenly looked up, livid. “I did _ not- _ ” 

Excalibur held up a hand, silencing her. “No, shoosh, this is a good idea.” He turned back to Tyl. “It’s just like my floof theory but with the real one.”

“Uh-”   


“Don’t ask.” Hildryn said, irked.

“Fine. Where is she?” Tyl asked, trying not to appear overly eager.

“She’s at Larunda, most likely. Just follow us back, and we’ll make sure you don’t get jumped,” Excalibur said, fixing Hildryn with a stare. 

“What am  _ I  _ going to do? Don't’ look at me like that.” she hissed.

“Don’t worry, it’ll be easy.” he said, patting her on a massive shoulder.

“Easy?  _ Easy? _ To ninja a ten-ton brick shithouse of a  _ Grineer general  _ onto a  _ relay?  _ Are you out of your mind?!”

“Okay, you can stay here if you want to.  _ I’m  _ going to give Saryn back her boyfriend.” He turned, motion for Tyl to follow.

"Not without me." Hildryn said finally, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Excalibur faced her, nodding after a moment. “Come on, then. We can talk about plans on the way.”

Shock of all shocks, it turned out that sneaking a ten-ton brick shithouse of a Grineer general onto a Tenno relay wasn't so easy after all. Who would have guessed?

In the end, they decided to stash him in a back room like a sack of potatoes with Excalibur, while Hildryn went to find Saryn. Being that they had ample time, Tyl asked him to clarify something.

"Alright, since Hildryn isn't here to clap her hand over your mouth, what's this whole deal with floofs?" he asked the Warframe, getting straight to the point.

"Oh, that! I got Saryn a floof that looked like you while she was Infested." he replied, his tone implying he was aware of how weird it actually was.

"A floof."

"Yes."

"Of  _ me. _ "

"Yes. It was all part of my theory, and I turned out to be right, so as downright strange as it was, it may have saved Saryn's life." Excalibur replied, sounding...proud of this.

“Where did you manage to find a floof of  _ me _ ?” Tyl asked, confused.

“Uh...Fortuna?”

Tyl narrowed his eyes but didn’t force him to elaborate. “Which brings us to the  _ why?  _ What in the System gave you that idea?”   
  
“It’s pretty simple, actually.” he shrugged. “I thought if she had something worth surviving the Infestation for, she'd start fighting it. Obviously it would be you, and I got her the floof to...prod her memory, if you will.”

“Why? What stake did you have in her recovery?” Tyl asked, trying not to sound as suspicious as he felt.

“None whatsoever. I just wanted her to get better, and help her see that doing so was worth it,” he said. His voice got quieter. “I could have done something much earlier to help her, but I didn’t. That’s on me. Maybe if I had reached out sooner I could have prevented her getting Infested entirely. I wanted to mend my mistake.”

Tyl was silent for a moment. Suddenly, he reached out and patted the frame on the shoulder. “What matters is that you tried, and I appreciate that.”

Excalibur stiffened, unsure of how to respond to the physical gesture. “Thank you...I think?”

The two sat in silence for a while, until Hildryn burst into the room, breathing hard. 

“Dryn, what happened?” Excalibur asked, jumping to his feet and glad for an alleviation of the awkward silence.

“I...things went down, let’s just say. The good news: I found Saryn.”

“And the bad news?” Tyl asked, not even bothering to mask the fear creeping in his voice.

“She...well, you may want to see her for yourself.”


	37. Sentient Slayer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Sentient Slayer does what she does best
> 
> Takes place in tandem with Chapter 36
> 
> Massive thank you to my lovely beta reader TheDiamondFox for helping us write a good chunk of this.

Kelpie trusted Oberon, she really did.

  
Not only had he been there to heal her everytime she got herself downed in some stupid way, but he was always kind to her, always had been, even in her early days, and was more than happy to guide her through whatever new layer of contrived the Warframes had to deal with on the regular.

But this...she wasn’t so sure about. 

He’d invited her on a mission to Lua, which she was fine with. Sure, it was generally agreed upon that Lua sucked, but as the stress from her...run in with Saryn faded and healed, she was growing wearier and wearier of hiding in her tank, and was looking for excuses to get out. She also didn’t question Titania coming along. Sure, the fairy could be plain weird, but she had an odd charm about her. Maybe it was the pixie form.

What she had to question, however, was Oberon inviting _Saryn,_ of all people. Kelpie was at a point where she could tolerate being in the same room with her, that was true. That didn’t mean she wanted to start getting buddy-buddy with her. Being completely honest, she wasn’t sure of what she thought of Saryn at all. 

It was strange being so torn on something she felt she should be more decisive on, but here she was, tossing around her feelings and reasonings on Saryn like her father throwing empty cases of shotgun shells. It was confusing. She felt like she should hate Saryn. Nobody would blame her for wanting to see the disgraced frame in the same grave she’d tried to put Kelpie herself in, and maybe at one point, she did (highly unlikely, as Kelpie definitely wasn’t _that_ heartless). Having seen Saryn at her lowest and most helpless, however, had complicated things.

That, and the sound of her hand crunching under the Wolf’s sledge still played on repeat in her head from time to time.

That sound haunted her, taunted her. Not the sound itself, per say, although it was certainly unpleasant. It was the implications of it. The anger that had shot up the moment the two had locked eyes, her willingness to hurt Saryn, even though she couldn’t prove she’d actually done anything wrong, and the twisted _thrill_ she’d felt for a moment when she’d crushed Saryn’s hand. It made her feel and think very ugly things. _You liked it, you liked hurting her and you didn’t want to stop at just her hand. You’re a monster, and you enjoy seeing her getting hurt, being in pain. You want to inflict more pain on her, punish her, get the real justice you never truly received, for everything. She deserves it, deserves to be forced to squirm like the little corpse-maggot she is, worthless, filthy, wretched thing._

Kelpie didn’t like thinking like that. She didn’t like being cruel, but that brief, dark thrilling feeling had scared her, and the worst part was she didn’t know who to ask about this. Normally she would have gone straight to Alad, but, well, Alad wanted Saryn dead. While it wasn’t a sentiment Kelpie shared, she supposed since she wasn’t a parent, she couldn’t really make a good judgement on the matter. She bet her bottom credit Alad would give her that very ‘what-it’ scenario if she brought it up.

She'd seen Saryn injured, heard her crying in the night while tied to her father's operating table, begging forgiveness from _everyone_ and praying for a respite of the agony she was in. She knew that at one point there had been a stretch of months where Saryn hadn't interacted or even seen anyone. Not a soul. Completely, utterly alone. She remembered the time she'd been offered some kind of apology, to open some kind of path atonement, and her slinking away like an abused Kubrow afterwards. 

She remembered opening that message from Mag, and that secret, unshown footage it contained. She remembered listening to Saryn say that she wanted to die, if it made things right. 

She remembered all this, and more. It bothered her, but she didn’t expect to have to confront these feelings for a long time. 

So that turned out to be wrong.

She stared at the pale frame, trying not to appear as deer-in-the-headlights as she felt. Not because she was afraid, but because she was completely out of her depth. Not knowing how to deal with these emotions had led to a sort of truce between them, where they both went completely out of their ways to avoid each other. Saryn, for her part, sat away from all of them, her shoulders slumped slightly. She looked tenser than a bunched spring, ready to jump if anything so much as poked her.

“Oberon, are you _sure_ this is a good idea?” she hissed to him.

“Just trust me. Besides, I could use both of you on this mission,” he said, patting her on the shoulder. “Everything will be fine if we work together.” 

“It’s not that I don’t like her. Honestly...I don’t know how I feel about her.” Kelpie gave Saryn a sidelong glance. “But I don’t know if shoving us together so soon is a good idea, because even if she doesn’t hate me anymore, she definitely doesn’t like me. I don’t think we’ll even be on friendly terms, actually.”

“Looking at Saryn, she obviously doesn’t want to be here, either. If either of you don’t want to come, you can just walk away,” he offered. “Nobody would think less of you if you did.” 

“I do want to come, though. I want to spend time with you, whatever this mission is, and I won’t let her mere presence chase me away.” 

Oberon leaned in close. “I don’t mean this in a bad way, but have you thought about how she might feel the same way?” 

Kelpie hesitated, then simply shook her head. 

“I guarantee you that though she doesn’t feel exactly like that, it is something similar. Both of you seem to be scared that the other will bite first, and so avoid each other. I know you don’t plan on doing any such thing, just like I know the same of her.” 

“Alright, I’ll drop it for now.” She took a deep breath. “So, what’s the mission, and who else are we waiting for?”

“We’re going scouting on Lua, and if necessary, we’re going to kill some Sentients. There’s been some big spikes in Sentient activity there, and since that’s where the Operators are...not good. As for who we’re waiting for, that would be Titania, so it might be a while. She’s either very early or fashionably late.”

Kelpie nodded.

“Don’t worry.” Oberon said gently. “I won’t let anything happen between you two.” he rested a hand on her shoulder. 

“Alright,” she said quietly. “I trust you.” 

And that ended the matter. Titania had arrived, and they were on their way.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nothing good ever came from or happened on Lua, and every Warframe and Tenno knew this, including Saryn herself.

So if someone could explain to her how she let herself get roped into a mission on it, that would have been great. But no, here she was, wasting her time on a forsaken rock of a moon, with _Kelpie_ of all people. 

Needless to say, Saryn was not having a good time. 

The stress was getting to her. It had already taken everything she had just to come to the relay, and to _not_ run in the opposite direction when Oberon approached her and asked her to join his mission to Lua. She hated Lua, but she’d said yes anyway. Why? She didn’t know. She should have bailed when he mentioned Lua, but she didn’t, and then who should join them but _Kelpie._

Her rational mind told her that she had absolutely no reason to fear her. Kelpie wasn’t evil enough to just try and kill her (she hoped), and if she was, someone would stop her (probably). Saryn was also rather sure she could take the younger frame if it came down to a fight. Nothing to be afraid of. Her irrational mind spoke differently, and it was speaking louder.

_Maybe I’m not afraid of just Kelpie. Maybe I fear being around her in general._ Saryn thought, trying to distract herself. _Nothing good ever comes from that, either. Interacting with Kelpie, or merely existing within the same space as her is a hazard to my health, it seems, if I’m not already falling apart._

She took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. _I haven't come on the mission to worry about Kelpie. I came to do the mission, so I’d better do it._ At least, that's what she was trying to tell herself. The pressure was mounting, and she’d curled up as much as she could so nobody noticed her, arms wrapped tightly around her torso. _Maybe that’s it. Just being in a social situation after everything that’s happened._ _I feel disconnected from everyone. Like a stranger, or a ghost._ She was scared of the potential reaction her presence would cause.

_I don’t like being scared of nothing. I don’t want to live like a rabbit. I said I’d change after that last dream, dammit! So why am I still terrified? I don’t bloody know!_

Nothing would happen, surely, is what she was trying to convince as the blood roared in her ears. Everything would be fine, completely, _utterly-_

The scent of iron filled her nose suddenly, and something hot and viscous dripped over her lips and down her chin, putting a rusty, metallic taste on her tongue and making her jerk in surprise. Not even bothering to check if anyone was watching, she let her helmet come off and wiped her face with the back of her hand. It came away smeared with crimson.

Blood. Her nose was bleeding. Quickly, she replaced her helmet, hoping that nobody had noticed, trying to ignore the fact that her heart sped up at the sight of it. Something about seeing her own blood outside of her like this made her feel sick.

“Saryn?” Oberon tapped her shoulder. She snapped out of her haze and looked up. “We’re going.”

“O-oh, alright. I’m coming.” she replied, hoping her voice wasn’t shaking, and inconspicuously wiped her fingers on the nearest surface. Looking up to see Titania following along, she groaned inwardly. As if Kelpie wasn’t enough. 

“Are you ok?” he asked, concerned, and fuck him, he actually sounded like he meant it.

“I’m good, promise.” she said, trying to make herself sound more confident than she really was. 

Oberon gave her a look, but didn’t press, and she let out a small sigh of relief. _Don’t have to spill everything yet,_ she thought. 

All too soon, they arrived. Saryn looked around at the dusty, univiting silver surface, and the marble-and-gold hellscape that towered over them. Why could they just move this stupid rock back into the Void, she didn’t know. Her nose had finally stopped bleeding, and she felt a little better, being free from the relay, even if this hunk of lunar junk was arguably worse.

“I want you all to keep your guard up. We’ve got no idea where they are or what ‘lysts are there.” Oberon said, his Bo prime clenched in a hand being used as a very fancy walking stick.

They kept close together, being careful to not make any unnecessary noise that might give them away. 

“Y-you don’t think the Operators are actually in any danger, do you?” Kelpie asked, her step a bit more nervous and twitchy.

“I don’t believe so,” Oberon said reassuringly. “But I haven’t always been right, and it’s better to make sure they’re alright than to take for granted that they are.” 

Titania perched on her muzzle. “Look on the bright side. We were made to fight Sentients, so if there are any here, we’ll be fine.”

“Get off my face please.” Kelpie said, irked. Oberon reached over and flicked her off, causing her to let out a small screech before flying up and trying unsuccessfully to smack him. 

“We’re here on a mission, not to play around,” he chastised. 

“Bah, you’re not fun.” she pouted.

“And you’re unfocused. We need to depend on each other here,” he reiterated, glancing at Saryn while motioning them forward.

Titania pouted, behaving herself.

Saryn hung back, her hands so tight around her Cyskis hilts that if her knuckles had been flesh, they would’ve been white. This place always got to her, and though the others weren’t as affected, she felt everything. Maybe it was something buried deep that was lurching in it’s cage every time she came either here or the Void.

The grave-like silence of the cold, long dead bone-white halls was torn away by an ear-splitting wail that was both hellish to bear witness to and all too familiar. The call of an Oculyst.

“Get ready, we’ve got Sentients inbound!” Oberon called.

He clutched his Bo prime tightly, his gaze never settling in a single spot. Titania fluttered back and forth, her movements jerky and sporadic, and Kelpie threw constant glances behind them, while stepping as quietly as she could. 

The group broke into a nearly silent run, one gold and white room giving way to another. The ruined halls seemed to never end, and as time wore on, tensions rose within the group. Nobody spoke, nor made any unnecessary noise. Even Titania’s seemingly untameable sass had been toned down. 

Finally, the halls gave way to a large, open room, the high walls studded with a few balconies. Battalysts were hovering ominously in various positions around the space. They all turned to face the frames, their mechanical bodies clicking and whirring as they moved, sounding off to each other with their hums and whines.

After a long moment of both groups not moving a muscle, the uneasy stillness between them snapped like a broken twig.  
  
As the Battalysts moved to attack, the group quickly scattered to find cover, except for Saryn, who pounced on the nearest one and started shredding it. She refused to be the weak link on this mission. Oberon and Titania were doing their part as well, dodging the beams and using what power they could bring to bear against the Sentients.

Kelpie, however, was in no position to fight back. Separated from the rest of the group, she was stuck trying to overcome the Sentient’s immunities before they took her out first. She wasn’t a stranger to fighting Sentients, but she wasn’t the master some of her comrades were. While they were firing and fighting back, she was cowering behind cover, too afraid of getting injured to take any sort of decisive action. 

“Titania!” Oberon called. “Go help Kelpie! If she dies, Alad’ll kill us!” 

Titania nodded as she disengaged and flew towards the trapped Kelpie. As she neared the Sentients, she changed her size to match those of her fellow warframe and thrusted her Pangolin Prime forward, using her weight to impale one of the Battalysts. As it started to fizzle, she quickly shifted to her Corinth Prime and proceeded to Annihilate the remaining Sentients, their resistances unable to keep up with the constant barrage of the Orokin Shotgun.

“You okay?” asked Titania, her usual sarcastic tone replaced with that of concern. 

Kelpie could only nod mutely, still shocked over how efficiently her fellow warframe obliterated the ancient machine. 

“Look sharp,” chirped Oberon, finishing his own Battalyst. “We got more incoming.”

Titania nodded, then proceeded to shrink back down into her pixie form and dart down the hall.

Oberon shook his head, conveying his fatigue and amusement, before holding his hand out for Kelpie to take.

She took it, smiling graciously despite how embarrassed she was.

“We’ve all been there,” Oberon said sympathetically, sensing her emotions. “Sentients aren’t easy. It takes patience and practice to kill them as efficiently as we do.”

Kelpie nodded, her confidence rising.

Oberon seemed to smile underneath his helmet. “Let’s kick some Sentient ass.”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A slash, a tear, a pulling apart of another artificial body. To say this was child’s play for Saryn would be an understatement.

She was living up to her title as “Sentient Slayer.”

She grumbled as her Cyskis impaled the glowing core of another Battalyst, her Toxic Lash doing wonders to break the immunities of these Tau tin cans. She quickly shot a spore at another Battalyst before Molting and bullet-jumping into the air. Switching to her Corinth Prime, she unleashed a barrage of firepower onto the stunned Battalysts, causing them to collapse one-by-one in a shockwave of Sentient energy. As she landed gracefully on the ground, she let out a deep breath to steady herself. It had been a while since she had broken so many Sentient bodies. 

Needless to say, she was in her element. Even enjoying herself, for once. She grit her teeth and shook her head, trying to clear all the ugly thoughts clawing in the corners of her skull. Her vision flickered for a moment, her Heads Up Display most likely representing the inner turmoil of her mind.

_Wait._

She looked up and saw that it wasn’t just her headset. The lights had flickered.

Saryn started to panic. Usually that would mean many things depending on where she was. Flickering lights were the calling card of many a-nasty foe, like the wails of the Juggernauts on Deimos, the Grustags come to insult Umbra’s scarf, or the Stalker’s bloody glow, or even some Syndicate leader feeling petty. However, neither of these showed up on Lua of all places. Deadlocked between Corpus, Grinner, and Tenno control, no faction truly had dominance on the barren rock. This could only mean…

Saryn needed to get to the others immediately. 

Molting again, Saryn used her increased speed to bullet jump across crevices and shafts, worrying taking over every portion of her mental processes. Soon, she spotted more Sentients converging on a flanked Oberon. Saryn shot her spores into the crowd, giving Oberon the upper hand. She barely registered his “Thanks” as she continued on, her mind focused on the flashes. She maneuvered down the halls, sporing and using her Miasma to control the tide of Sentients.

 _This wasn’t normal_ , came an errant thought. Saryn almost paused. _Since when are the Sentients actually effective, much less strategic?_

Saryn’s eyes widened as another frightening thought came to mind. If the Sentients were organizing…

She came into a music puzzle room. Memories of her time with Tyl, how they played together, stung at the dark recesses of her mind.

Currently, what lied there was instead the prostrated form of Titania, her size normal in stark contrast to it’s tiny chipper form. Her weapons laid scattered on the ground, their pristine Orokin designs scratched and battered. What Titania was covering, however, was cause for greater concern. Her body was hunched over the prone form of Kelpie, the newest Warframe seemingly unable to get up. There was a jagged gash on her leg, starting at the back of her knee and curling around to the top of her ankle, so deep a few pearly slivers of her bone showed through her flesh. She could see her chest rising and falling rapidly, her whole body tensed in pain.

However, Saryn’s attention was drawn towards the massive thing looming above them.

To say it was a monster was an understatement. To Saryn, it was evil personified. It was Sentient. That much was true. Indeed, there was nothing else Saryn could really think it could be. However, it’s form was different. Where the torso of most Sentients were, it had nothing more than an amorphous black orb, it’s borders shifting in and out, and it almost made her sick to look at. It looked...wrong, like it shouldn’t exist, in this System or Tau, or anywhere. While there was a light giving way to it’s core, Saryn couldn’t tell how it was supposed to work, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to know. 

That question was quickly answered as a massive, inky tendril of whatever material the thing was made out of jutted outwards from its inky shape. It shifted between multiple different weapons. The cannon of Battalyst. The Melee club of a Conculyst. The enlarged laser of the Symbilyst. Until it settled on the jagged form similar to the War Sword, only… different. Where the blades of the War Sword were straight, this blade curved evilly to the sides, with each split edge forming jegged spikes and easily around two thirds her height. Isolated, each side of the sword reminded Saryn of the primitive khopesh of the pre-Orokin era. Together, however, Saryn had no doubt the blade could easily shatter any weapon that attempted to split it. 

As it chose its shape, Saryn couldn’t help notice it solidifying its darkened ooze to cease its rapid changing. Suddenly, it raised its sword-arm, preparing to strike the prone Titania. Quick as lightning, Saryn Molted and bullet-jumped into the fray, intercepting the blow with her Cyskis. Suddenly, Saryn seemed to fold as she shifted her feet to land firmly on the ground, gaining leverage to keep the darkened blade from hitting the Warframes.

“Get out of here, Titania!” said Saryn through gritted teeth.

Titania looked at her in shock.

“I said Get out!” Saryn yelled, shooting her Miasma outwards in hopes of staggering the huge Sentient.

To Saryn’s utter surprise, it had no effect.

Correction: It has an unintended effect.

To the bewilderment of the Warframes present, the Sentient’s entire body morphed. It’s tar black form began to take on a more humanoid form. Small outgrowths began to perforate outwards like limbs. Two massive tendrils jutted to the floor before thickening, growing outwards to resemble legs. As the Sentient continued, Saryn became more and more shocked as the form began to become more and more familiar, before its transformation was complete.

Standing before Saryn, bearing the weight of some amalgam War Sword, was Saryn herself. Although the colors didn’t precisely match, as the hues were an odd conglomeration of Sentient reds and whites, the form was unmistakable.

“Titania,” said Saryn, her voice unnervingly devoid of emotion.

Titania had rarely, if ever, heard Saryn so deathly serious. Completely dead inside or apathetic, sure. Nothing like this.

“Take Kelpie, and go,” Saryn finished.

Titania looked at her in utter bewilderment.

“I’m going to buy you as much time as I can,” said Saryn. “But I need you to…”

She got no further as the pseudo-Saryn released a Miasma of their own. Saryn visibly recoiled, as the shockwave of her own ability hit her. Titania wasted no time, as soon as she felt the ability go off, she moved. Picking up the semi-conscious Kelpie, she booked it as fast as her normal legs could carry her. 

The pseudo-Saryn paid them no mind, its eyes on Saryn.

 **“To think it was this easy to duplicate you pathetic machines,”** came a semi-robotic voice. It’s voice reflected Saryn’s almost, but the metallic infliction separated the difference.

“What… are you?” Saryn asked with baited breath, the thing’s Miasma still coursing through her body.

 **“I am Allagiyst,”** said the pseudo-Saryn. **“And I will be the undoing of the Tenno.”**

Saryn, now suitably recovered, released her own Miasma, it’s shockwave spreading. However, the Allagiyst seemed to not be affected. She felt she should’ve been more horrified, but honestly? The only thing she felt was a pure, hot wire of rage coil around her heart and squeeze. This...thing, this Orokin _mistake_ not only could turn into her, but it had the absolute gall to try and turn her own power on her. When her’s had had no effect on it. The sheer arrogance of this _creature_. It had her powers for less than a minute and yet it seemed to think it was stronger than her, who’d had them for literally centuries, probably longer. 

She clenched her Cyskis tightly, wanting nothing more than to drop them and tear the bastard to pieces with her bare hands.

 **“Your little Tenno Tricks won’t work on me,”** said the Sentient. 

Saryn ground her teeth irritably. “Go die in the Void you cosmic accident.” she hissed. 

She proceeded to Bullet jump into the air and release her spores onto her double. She was slightly satisfied to see that the spores had an effect on the sentient, as it visibly took a step back from the impact, starting.

Her victory was short lived, as she felt her spores suddenly die all at once. As if to confirm her suspicions, her double swiftly deployed spores of her own, once again bathing Saryn in a fresh wave of burning agony.

 **“You cannot defeat me, Infested Puppet,”** the Allagiyst stated tauntingly. 

As Saryn crashed to the ground, her head swam from pain and agony. Suddenly, she heard a weezing, grating sound. Through blurry vision, she attempted to find the source of it, only to realize: it was coming from her double.

It was _laughing_.

Rage boiled inside of her as the noise continued, memories swimming underneath her vision. Memories of pain, of anguish, of torment. The Witch’s torture in her dreams, the taunting and leering of her fellow tenno, the shame and guilt of her relationship, her urge to kill herself, to believe she _needed_ to. 

Her pain, her torment brewing over however long she held it in, had finally reached the breaking point.

Through unbridled fury and anger, she Molted and charged at her double, her speed catching it off guard. It’s laughter ceased in shock for only a moment, but that moment was enough. Corinth Prime in one hand, Cyskis in the other, she charged with all her might at the Sentient. The Sentient, shocked, swung downward with its sword arm, only for Saryn to catch it with her Cyskis. It stopped for a moment. A moment Saryn took to swiftly unload her entire clip into the changeling. As it ran dry, she felt her double grab the barrel of the shotgun and deftly toss it away. Not missing this moment, Saryn deftly jumped and kicked off the Sentients chest, preparing for a repeat.

Only for her to get yanked back.

The double’s sword arm refused to let go of her Cyskis. Saryn turned to see her Cyskis, her favorite weapon, that she’d had for ages, start to melt against the blade. In an act of shocked desperation, she let go of the blade, only for her double to catch her arm in its empty grip. 

Saryn tried to tear away, but its grip was too strong.

 **“Infested Doll,”** said the Allagiyst with finality. **“The Noise you make will be silenced, now and forever.”**

As the meaning to those words dawned on Saryn, she could do nothing as her double’s sword swiftly impaled her, its acidic touch burning into and through her chest. Saryn gasped and coughed as blood welled up in her throat and dripped from her nose. She felt the Allagiyst prop her up as it looked into her eyes. It’s face started to melt as it proceeded to move its helmet, showing a perfect copy of Saryn’s face, save for its eyes, which gleamed with the rusty red of old, dried blood instead of the true Saryn’s vibrant amethyst.

The face, _Saryn’s face_ , grinned at her. **“Any last words, Puppet?”** it cried gleefully.

Saryn strained to speak the words that came to her mind. “They’re... _dual_ Cyskis.”

Confusion crossed the Allagiyst’s face before Saryn plunged her other Cyskis straight into the doppelganger's chest.

Right into its Sentient core.

The Allagiyst froze for a moment at the realization of what just happened. A moment Saryn took to swiftly and deftly extract her blade around the Sentient Core. With a hearty and tired tug, she tugged the core free of its body, letting it fall to the ground with a dull thud. She felt a pang of sadness in her heart at the sight of the Cyskis, now ruined, starting to melt into the ground, but soon Saryn barely registered the scream of the dying Sentient as she faded from consciousness, her last thoughts of Tyl.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

_Once there was a Warframe named Saryn._

_She’s had a few different faces over the centuries, changing as her heart did._

_She’d hoped this one would have time to stick, but it looked like that wouldn’t be the case._

_Such a lonely, sad little girl. Trying to plug the holes in herself with only her fingers, and no help._

_So, so tired. When would it finally be over? She wanted to rest now. This wasn’t...had never been worth it. She could let go now. She’d done enough, surely. Maybe one day someone would look back and realize they missed her. Some day…_

“I’m sorry…” 

Saryn’s eyes flew open, greeted by a cool, smooth grey floor against her bare...skin? She sat up and looked at her hands. Long, pale, delicate fingers curled gently towards her. She turned her hand over, revealing light pink nails giving way to a short crescent of white. She looked over the rest of herself. Real, skin, unbroken by scar or sword steel. She traced a finger between her breasts, where the Allagiyst had stabbed her. There was nothing. She ran her hands over herself, over where specific parts of her armor had been. Nothing but smooth skin. She looked down at her feet. She curled her toes in and out a few times. Finally she looked at her face in the pristine, reflective surface of the floor, with not even a print to show where her body had been.

Elegant, delicate features stared back at her. A few locks of her snowy hair had escaped their tie, and draped themselves over her forehead. She blinked a few times, long lashes brushing her cheeks before pulling away to reveal white scleras and her own amethyst purple eyes. 

She stood up straight and looked around. Behind her was black, but it seemed familiar, somehow. In front of her, however…

A soft, shadow grey curtain fluttered in front of her. It looked to be made of layers of a light, airy tulle fabric, enough to take away the translucent quality of it, and it was covered in little glimmers, like someone had scattered millions of tiny diamonds all over it, like stars. It fluttered in some unseen, unfelt breeze, revealing an opening just big enough to be noticed. Beyond it? Nothing but white.

She walked around the room in a slow circle, trying to process what she was seeing. This place felt important, somehow, but she couldn’t put a finger on why. It gave her a deep, dull ache in her heart, and she remembered everything. _Everything._

She remembered the Allagiyst’s blade through her chest, she remembered the feeling of the Infestation’s grip finally releasing her, she remembered the horror as it had first begun to take her over and twist her body. 

She remembered Tyl’s arms around her, his gentle hands stroking her hair, his lips on hers, his kind words in her ear, how he’d made her happy, so, so happy.

All the scorn, all the pain, every nick and scratch and bullet wound, every time she’d taken off her helmet and rested it against her gun for a few moments, wondering if she should just get it over with. All her schemes, all her lies, her almost painful love for Nidus.

She remembered crawling out of her cryopod, and the Lotus’s soothing voice.

She remembered the agony of the Helminth creeping through her blood, turning her skin to steel, all while whispering apologies to her like she was nothing more than a frightened bird.

Saryn took a few steps back, shaking her head, and trying to keep the thoughts of Tyl in place. She made another lap around the room, before glancing at the fluttering curtain again. Surely it wouldn’t hurt to just take a look…?

Cautiously, she parted it with her hands and stepped forward a bit. 

Her fingers and toes became translucent, and her whole body felt a bit...ethereal, for lack of a better term. There was nothing behind it, just the darkness slowly gradienting to white at the end of a long, smooth hallway. She wanted to sprint down it, to run towards that light and never look back, but…

If she did, would she ever see Tyl again?

It felt silly, to her. Ignoring what could be her ultimate fate for the sake of a man she loved, but she couldn’t shake the thought loose. She wanted to see him again, hear his voice and feel the warmth he always gave her. She missed him, missed him so desperately it was starting to hurt, and as she went down that hall she had a gut feeling that she’d never see him again.

That she wouldn’t even remember him.

She stepped back through the curtain, the gauzy fabric clinging to her skin. The room changed, now decorated with long vines of blooming white orchids all over the place, a scattering of fallen petals brushing her bare feet, being kicked up and fluttering in the flight breeze. She plucked one, and using the mirror-like floor, wove it into her hair. She gave a small smile seeing it, her face looking far less tired and sorrowful.

She took one last look at the room, at the orchid blossoms growing all over, at the starry curtain fluttering in the invisible breeze. 

Saryn turned and ran, her feet slapping against the smooth, grey, mirror floor.


	38. Despair and Grace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stabbed through the chest, and you're too late; darlin' you give love a bad name

“Shhh Kelpie, easy, don’t worry, you'll be alright.” Oberon said soothingly, stroking her muzzle as he cast Renewal on her while Titania fluttered about anxiously, back in pixie form.

“Hurry up Oberon, we have to go back and help Saryn!” the fairy squeaked, tugging on one of his antlers. “Seriously, I don’t think even she can hold that thing off for very long by herself.”

“I need help too, you know.” Kelpie snorted, irked. “Did you heal it all the way?” She asked, turning to him.

“I’ve done the best I can, but Alad’ll probably have to fix it when we get back. I think you could walk, however. I’ll help you if need be. If you want to come along, that is. You are in no way obligated to.” he offered gently.  
  
“No, I’ll come, I’ll come.” Kelpie stood up shakily, putting an arm over Oberon’s shoulder. “I don’t know how much help I’ll be but I’ll do what I can, if anything.”

Oberon nodded, and the three slowly made their way to Saryn, the only sounds coming from the fluttering of Titania’s wings and the clips of Kelpie and Oberon’s hooves. It was a tense trip, but not like the one before. This was thick with a different kind of dread for what they’d find there. A corpse, sure. Who’s was the question that nagged at the three of them.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saryn peeled her eyes open, slowly coming back around. To say the pain was unbearable was an understatement. She was impaled halfway on one of the Allagiyst’s blade, her upper half suspended by it. Her mouth tasted like iron, and she could feel blood slowly running from her nose down her chin and neck. She heard it dripping down the blade from the wound and falling on the golden floor.

Still, she was alive, if only barely. Breathing felt like inhaling glass shards, but she could do it, and so she did, practically forcing herself to. She’d turned away that curtain, and by the Lotus she wasn’t going to go back there. Not now, it was far, _far_ too soon.

Besides, how could she just leave Tyl like that? With nothing, no warning, no clue to where she’d gone, only to find out she was now a corpse. She claimed to love him, so how could she do that to him? No, she would not die here, she _would not_ …

She wheezed again, her vision blurring, and her body shivering weakly. Determined as she was to live, unless someone came to help her soon, she was pretty sure she wouldn’t.

_I guess this isn’t...such a bad way to go. It’s heroic, in a way. I saved Kelpie and Titania. I...managed to redeem myself a little bit, by doing that. I destroyed that awful monster. I...I chose to go back when I was at those curtains, if that was even real. I just wish I could see Tyl one more time. If I die here, I can’t imagine how he’d feel. I just...I hope it won’t hurt too much. I love you so damn much, you overly-intelligent Grineer…_

“Saryn!”

She perked up a bit, slowly and painfully turning her head to look in the direction of whoever had shouted her name. Kelpie was kneeling next to her in a moment after, visibility shaken. Oberon followed, Titania sitting on his shoulder.

“It’s dead.” Saryn said simply, trying to avoid gurgling on the blood in her throat.

“You killed that…thing?” Titania asked, her voice shockingly gentle.

“Yep. The Allagiyst is dead.” She coughed weakly. 

“H-how bad is it, Oberon?” Kelpie asked, trying to tamp down the fear in her voice. 

He looked her over methodically for a moment and inhaled sharply before answering. “It couldn’t be much worse, to be honest. It looks like the blade pierced her right lung, which would explain her wheezing.” 

“Right in the tit.” Titania winced. “Thank you, Saryn.” she said, hovering over the supine frame’s face. “I...I won’t lie, I didn’t expect that from you, but, well, thank you.”

Saryn gave the slightest of nods. “Don’t bother dancing around it. I’m going to die, right?”

“I-I’m not sure.” Oberon said, his voice quiet. “I don’t want to give you false hope, not like this, but I could...I might be able to keep you alive long enough to get you to Alad, who could definitely patch you up the rest of the way.”

“As long as the Lotus makes him.” Titania reminded them.  
  
“ _I’ll_ fucking make him!” Kelpie cried. “Y-you saved my life, and Titania as well. After everything, why…?” 

Saryn tried to prop herself up on one elbow, but Oberon pushed her back down gently. She laid back, coughing and sniffling. “Least I could’ve done. I...owe you a lot more than that, and if...I die now, that’ll...covered.” She coughed again, tasting blood. “M-my life...for yours. Was...always worth more...”

**_“NO!”_ ** Kelpie shook her head fiercely. “That’s not...Saryn, how can you think that?! You’ve been trying so hard to change, so don’t give up now! I...I saw you trying, I saw you working your ass off, doing the missions everyone hates, trying to make up with me, and how badly you were being received. I could’ve stopped it. I could’ve helped you, I could’ve accepted your apology that one time, you remember that day, don’t you?” Kelpie turned, choking up as she spoke. “I didn’t. I...I crushed your hand, I let you go half mad, I’m so sorry, I let Dad be so awful to you _when you were Infested of all fucking things_! I didn’t stop anyone from anything. My life isn’t more valuable than yours, and you don’t have to die to redeem yourself!” she finished, breathing hard. 

Silence stretched between them for a moment as Saryn processed her words. She coughed again, blood gurgling between her lips. 

“Why… apologizing? Shot...first.” she wheezed finally, her tongue feeling sluggish. “Don’t... deserve it.”

“Because you tried to get better! And nobody would give you the time of day!” Kelpie huffed, indignant.

“I hate to interrupt this heart to heart, but Saryn doesn’t have a lot of time _._ ” Oberon said firmly. We’ve gotta get her out of here and fixed up as soon as possible or we’re going to lose her.”

They both fell silent.

“Titania, you pull it out, and for the Lotus's sake be gentle and slow. I’ll be casting Renewal the whole time so hopefully she doesn’t drown in her own blood. Grab it, and don’t start pulling until I tell you.”

Titania nodded slowly, changed back to her normal form, and delicately grabbed the hilt of the brutal-looking blade. Oberon’s fingers lit up as he cast Renewal, holding them just above one side of her wound. 

“Now!” he called, making a V with his fingers and placing two on either side of the gash, letting his Renewal do it’s work.

Titania didn’t think she’d ever been this stressed in her life. One wrong move and that stupid sword of that Lotus-forsaken Sentient might slice right through Saryn. With a heave and a hearty tug, Titania yanked the sword free. Saryn gasped and choked blood, but Oberon’s Renewal started mending the damage upon the sword's exit.

But it wasn’t enough. The acidic residue of the sword prevented Saryn's wound from healing completely, and despite the potency of Oberon’s Renewal, it wasn’t enough to completely heal the wound. Titania dropped the sword as Saryn started to fall, the sword no longer propping up her right side. As Titania moved to support the injured Warframe, the sword’s hilt started to melt, until the only thing left were its two blades. Kelpie noticed this, and gingerly picked them up.

From there, it was a race against the clock.

Oberon and Titania held Saryn while they made the maddest dash possible, with Kelpie limping behind and taking out anything that got in their way on the best she could. Even with the Allagiyst defeated, the Sentients were still up for a scrap, and had moved on from smacking them to beating up the Corpus that were trying to stake a claim on this particular corner of this thrice-cursed rock.

Saryn had just enough time to register the fact that there seemed to be more enemies coming before passing out completely.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Saryn was getting truly sick of waking up here.  
  
The Orokin hall was fully decayed now. The walls were a dirty grey, tendrils of the Infestation were starting to entwine themselves around the place, and the gold was _rusting._ The air felt thick and heavy, like a tomb that hadn’t been opened for centuries.

Surprisingly enough, the Witch wasn’t up to her usual tricks, instead sitting and watching the Moth pacing a groove in the floor.

_“This is all your fault, you know that right?”_ the Moth said. She didn’t sound angry, just...resigned. The Witch nodded, knees drawn to her chest.

_“I know.”_ she said simply, her voice quiet, sad. _“I never imagined it would be like this. I went too far, didn’t I? It’s just like you warned me about. Now we’re both going to die.”_

The Moth crossed her arms and nodded solemnly. _“Most likely, anyway. So, what do you propose we do now, oh wise one?”_

_“Don’t you even start you wretched thing!”_ the Witch shot to her feet. _“Besides, there’s nothing we_ can _do. Nothing except hope it’s fast and somewhat painless.”_

Saryn let out an annoyed sigh. She might be on her last breaths, and still all they did was bicker? _By the Lotus, get your priorities straight!_

_“At least it’s going to be over soon. Maybe it’s not the best ending, but it’s what we would have deserved.”_ the Witch said, calmed again.

_“Oh don’t be like that. You’re both just as guilty and innocent as I am, as she is. It’s like a chain. One good part links to one bad part and so on. I was good until I fell for Nidus, you were bad until you decided to change. As for her...she hasn’t really had much time to do either, unfortunately.”_

Had neither of them considered Saryn really did not want to die? Her inner demons were much slower than she thought. It was a bit strange to her, even with the minor epiphany she had after the dream before this, that she wasn’t running into death’s arms like they were Tyl’s, but here she was. She was sick of this, sick of being strapped down in her own head like she was back on Alad’s operating table, wondering if he’ll defy the Lotus and stab her in the gut. She jerked upwards, surprised to find she wasn’t glued to the altar anymore. 

_Well that’s new. Not that I’m complaining._

“You two realize I don’t want to die, right?” Saryn piped up, sitting cross legged. They both paused and looked at her, shocked.

_“When did_ that _happen?”_ the Witch spat, the shade over her face starting to flicker.

“Happened a while ago. You’ve been in my head this whole time, how’d you miss it?” Saryn said, giving her a grin.

The Moth was grinning widely, looking around at the walls that were starting to crack and fracture. _“Ah well, it seems this is where we’ll part ways for now.”_

The decaying hall was fully starting to collapse now, huge chunks breaking off into gravel once they hit the floor. The bones on the floor were all a riot of blooming white orchids, growing out of the bones themselves. The force of this final crashdown sent the shadows finally melting off the Witch’s face. 

It was...shattered. Her left eye was gone, in its place nothing but a black, empty chasm. Cracks and fractures spiderwebbed out from it, covering her whole face. 

“That’s the side where Nidus slapped you, isn’t it?” Saryn blurted, gesturing to her missing eye. The Witch only nodded, before turning to the Moth.

_“Well played, Actias Luna. I suppose you win this little game of ours. If nothing else, you did not disappoint.”_

_“In the end I was working for the good of all of us, not just myself. Don’t worry, we can still be friends.”_ the Moth said, flipping up her veil for a moment and giving her a sweet, genuine smile. The Witch heaved a sigh, and turned to Saryn.

_“I’m sorry. For everything.”_ she said, real sorrow on her face.

Saryn nodded in acknowledgement.

As the hall crashed down around the three of them, the Moth and the Witch both gave her a look; the former’s was one of...pride, of all things. Pride, and warmth, like she really was happy for Saryn to finally reclaim a bit of herself. The latter was remorseful, had always been to some degree, tears leaking from her hollow eye. Her work had helped no one, and it was very hard to let go, but she was sorry, truly.

They both dissolved in a whirl of white orchid petals, and Saryn was left in the peaceful and quiet dark of her sleeping mind for the first time in what felt like years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actias Luna is the scienyific name of the Luna Moth


	39. Absolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One more before the curtain call.

Of all the things Alad expected to hear from Kelpie, “Saryn saved my life” was not one of them.

So when she came charging in spouting exactly that, with Oberon and Titania right on her tail carrying Saryn’s frighteningly limp body, and the former  _ aggressively  _ working his Renewal on her, he blanched.

“What... _ precisely  _ happened here?” Alad asked for the fifth time, trying to process Kelpie’s explanation as Oberon gently set Saryn down on his operating table (yet again).

“Kelpie’s told you four times already.” Oberon replied calmly.

“Saryn killed Leggy and saved Kelpie and I.” Titania joined.

“‘Leggy?’” Alad questioned.

“Yes.” Oberon sighed. “Kelpie was badly injured and Titania couldn’t fight off the  _ Allagiyst. _ ” he shot a glare at the faerie. “Some new type of Sentient. Saryn managed to distract it enough for the two to escape, but she’s badly injured. My Renewal isn’t enough, and she needs help  _ now  _ or she’ll die!” he said, his voice raising considerably. “So can you please stop asking stupid questions and do your thing?” 

“Keep your antlers on, you irritable cervine! I’m trying to make my brain process all this! You’re seriously just expecting me to just  _ accept  _ that this wretched creature is one, not completely evil anymore and two,  _ that she saved my daughter! _ Do you have any idea how absurd this all sounds to me?”

“Dad, it's true.” Kelpie said quietly, nickering to him softly. “She’s not...she’s not bad anymore. At least, not like she was before.” she said, trying to placate him. She fiddled with the dual blades of the Allagiyst. Alad heaved a sigh.

“I’ll do it, I’ll do it, don’t lose your head.” he conceded. “Set the blades down somewhere, I’ll look over them later.”

She nodded and nuzzled him, whickering softly. “Thanks Dad.”

He cracked a small smile at that. “Yeah, yeah. Now everyone gets out, and someone tell the Lotus.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<>{◇}<>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Oberon, is something up?” Hidryn asked him, swiveling her head back and forth to watch him pace along with Ivara. “How long has he been at this?” she asked the jellyfish-like frame.

“Couple of hours now, without stopping.” she said matter-of-factly, Uteki, her pet white frog, clenched between her hands delicately to keep him from hopping off to Lotus-knows-where. “After he brought Saryn back, he’s been like this and I haven’t been able to snap him out of it. I tried everything, even sticking Uteki on his face, so it’s pretty damn serious.”

“Wait, Saryn?” Hildryn froze. “What do you mean ‘brought her back’?”

“Oh right, you wouldn’t know. He went on a mission with Kelpie, Titania, and her, and brought her back with a giant gaping impalement wound in her chest.” Ivara shuddered, her tone turning serious. “She’s with Alad now, and as far as Oberon’s told me she’s gonna be ok, but…”

“When the  _ hell  _ did this all happen? How did I-wait, never mind.” She stopped herself and took a deep breath, remembering that she was smuggling a Grineer general onto a relay with Excalibur.

_ Dear Lotus, since when did I accept that? _

“I have to go do something.” Hildryn spouted, dashing away.

Ivara stood there for a moment, blinking under her helmet.

“You got any idea what that was about?” she asked Uteki. He croaked.   
  
“No idea.” Oberon called.

“I wasn’t asking you, Bambi, I was asking the frog, since he actually responds.” she replied snarkily, and he sighed. 

Not even five minutes later, the monstrous (and impressive) form of Tyl motherfucking Regor himself came barreling toward Alad's accursed little corner of the relay, Hildryn and Excalibur sprinting after him, bickering.

“I told you this was a bad idea!” she shouted at him.

“How was I supposed to know he’d react like that!?” he shot back.

“You couldn’t have guessed? Come on Excalibur, you’ve got to be smarter than that!’ Hildryn said in exasperation. 

“What the hell is going on, you two?!” Oberon interjected suddenly, sliding in front of Hildryn while Excalibur kept running.

“ _ Why is Tyl Regor here?!”  _ Ivara added, desperately trying to keep her grip on Uteki.

“I promise I’ll explain everything, just not now!” Excalibur called over his shoulder. Hildryn heaved a sigh.

“Seriously Hildryn, what’s going on?” Oberon asked, his tone taking on his usual doctor’s concern.

“It...complicated. I promise I’ll explain later.” Hildryn swore before bolting off after Excalibur.

Oberon and Ivara watched them trail after the massive Grineer general, confused looks scrawled across both of their faces under their helmets.

It didn’t help matters when the Lotus showed up, and it  _ really  _ didn’t help matters when she showed up  _ in person _ .

Hearing the sound of calm yet purposeful footsteps behind them, the two turned around and came face-to-face with the Lotus in the flesh. She wasn’t much taller than they were, but the inch she had served to heighten the effect of awe and reverence her mere presence caused.

“This is a strange situation we find ourselves in, isn’t it?” she said, her voice just as tender and kind as it was over their comms.

They both nodded simultaneously, looking up at her, wide eyed.

She gave them a gentle, reassuring smile before heading in the same direction.

Ivara looked to Oberon with a shocked expression, only to see Oberon matching her look. For a moment they stood there, utterly perplexed, before Ivara asked the question that was on both of their minds: “What the fuck just happened?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<>{◇}<>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tyl and Excalibur sat in silence for a while, the Grineer mulling over everything the frame had said to him. It was...strange, to him at least, that someone who barely knew Saryn went to such embarrassing lengths to save her life. Still, it bought the frame next to him some goodwill, so he was content to sit with him for the time being, at least until Hildryn burst into the room, breathing hard, and generally wrecking the relative peace. 

“Dryn, what happened?” Excalibur asked, jumping to his feet and glad for an alleviation of the awkward silence.

“I...things went down, let’s just say. The good news: I found Saryn.”

“And the bad news?” Tyl asked, not even bothering to mask the fear creeping in his voice.

“She...well, you may want to see her for yourself.”

“Hildryn, let’s not be vague here.” Excalibur said, giving Tyl a nervous glance. “What happened?”

“She’s uh...how do I put this nicely? Been impaled. By a Sentient blade.” she said hesitantly. Tyl, surprisingly, didn’t seem too shaken at first.

That is until he grabbed her by the shoulders and got all up in her business.

“Where is she?!”

“Alad’s lab.” Hildryn said, rooted in place.

Tyl turned on his heel (or, he would have if he had heels) and booked it, bolting out and down the hall.

“He’s shockingly fast.” Excalibur said, watching him go.

“EXCALIBUR, WE JUST LET OUR GRINEER GENERAL LOOSE IN A RELAY!” Hildryn yowled, holding his head between her hands.

He stood there for a moment, realization slowly dawning on him like he’s just been hit in the face by his Lich’s Kuva Shildeg. “We should probably go after him.”

“You don’t say!” she cried. “Oh hey, let’s bring Tyl Regor onto a fucking relay!’ You are the Parvos Granum of bad ideas!” 

“Hey, how about instead of insulting me, we follow him?” he asked pointedly. She let go of his face and ran out without another word, grabbing him by the belt and dragging him along.   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<>{◇}<>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
The Warframes dealt with a lot on a daily basis, and as such, nothing really surprised them anymore.

However, sometimes it seemed the System was more than willing to throw them a curveball every once in a while. Case in point, a massive enemy general dashing through their relay. That got their attention pretty quickly. Needless to say, everyone was shocked to some degree, and if, somehow, that didn’t quite suit their definition of absolutely insane, his questions certainly did.

“Where’s Alad?”

The worst part was that he sounded genuine. Whatever he needed from the ex-Corpus, it was clearly gnawing through him.

Once the shock wore off, most were pretty sure they knew what he was there for, or, rather, whom. 

Saryn.

Everyone was thinking it, even if they didn’t say it out loud. Of course he’d be here for his supposed girlfriend who just got run through by a Sentient. It would have been rather sweet had it been one of the other frames, and not one of the Tenno’s many enemies. As such, most were either too shocked to answer, or refused to.

But finally, he did get his answer, because thankfully there was at least one Warframe with a cooler head on his shoulders.

Loki stared up the Grineer commander, completely unfazed. The same couldn’t be said for Valkyr, who had jumped onto a ledge, gotten down on all fours and was hissing angrily while Loki stroked her head and did his best to calm her while dealing with Tyl. 

“It’s down that hall and to the left.” he said, pointing. 

Tyl rushed off in the specified direction, his stilted legs making ticking sounds on the floor as he ran. 

“Loki! Why would you just tell him?” Valkyr asked.

“Cause I know Tyl, thanks to Kuda and all. He’s really not that bad. I mean, Kelpie and Saryn both have nothing but good to say about him, which should count for something.” Loki replied, scratching her back, sending her into a tizzy of purrs.

“Yeah, but...you know that he and Alad have some bad blood, too. What if things go south between them?” 

“He most likely cares more about Saryn than about Alad. I wouldn’t be surprised to see Tyl ignoring him altogether.”   


Valkyr continued purring as Loki stroked her back. “I know, but still. Let’s keep an eye out, just in case. Rather not get caught lying down.”

“Alright you kavat, if that’ll make you feel better.” He scratched under her chin. “He’d have to be an utter fool to try to pull anything in a relay full of Warframes, you know.”

“True, but we’d also be pretty stupid to just take for granted that nothing will go wrong,” she countered, her purrs sending vibrations up Loki’s arm. “Even if he’s here just to see Saryn.” 

He nodded. “Fine, I can’t argue with that logic,” he conceded. “Still, I wish the two of them luck. Lotus knows Saryn needs something good to happen to her finally.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<>{◇}<>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Need to...stop ending up...on your operating table...like this.” Saryn said, giving her attempt at a half-hearted joke. Alad said nothing, just tried not to recoil as he looked at her wound.

It was an ugly, painful looking thing, the flesh and chitin around it having melted thanks to the Allagiyst’s acidic blade. Where once one of her breasts laid prominently on her chest, instead a massive, jagged gash of infested tissue and gore splattered across it, the wound pulsing as Saryn's punctured lung tried to inhale to no avail. Nearly the whole right side of her torso was covered in congealing blood. Alad has seen bad injuries, hell, he’d cut off his own arm once, but this? He didn’t even want to look at it.

Occupational hazards of working with Warframes, he supposed.

“You...you’re not...saying anything,” she wheezed, her strained voice sounding wet. “Can be fixed...right?”

He remained silent, thinking hard. Yes, he could patch it up. It wouldn’t be easy, however, it was doable. But…

He didn’t exactly  _ want  _ to.

After all, it was her fault that Kelpie had ended up in a do-or-die mission fighting a Hydrolyst. It was her fault that most of the frames, nearly all of them, now kept a close eye on his daughter. It sounded awful, he knew, and she’d die if he didn’t help. But Alad wasn’t the forgiving type, never had been, and now he had a chance to rid them all of her. It would just be karma for everything she’d done, to Kelpie, to him, to the Tenno, to  _ everyone _ . The System could live without her.

“No, it can’t be.” he said, looking her straight in the helmet where he knew her eyes were.

Saryn went still as a corpse, not looking at him, not looking at anything.

“At least...managed to...do something good with...this absolute... _ shitshow _ of a...a life.” She leaned back on the slab, her voice quieting. “A life for...a life. It’s...karma.” 

Alad stopped cold, her words bringing back a memory. A memory of Saryn, tied to this same damn table and clinging onto that floof of Tyl that Excalibur had gifted her for dear life, like it was the only stable thing left in the System. How he’d used those same words to justify letting her work through those emotions, instead of sedating her to end the crying. 

Was he really doing the right thing?   
  
Before he could question further, Saryn started speaking again, her voice sounding more strained than before. 

“I’m...sorry.” she whispered, choking briefly before continuing. “I’m so... _ fucking _ sorry for...all of this. I don’t...know how many...times I have to...say it before it actually...means something...coming from me, and I...out of time to...get to an adequate...amount.” She paused briefly, a sob escaping. “This life has...been nothing but...a waste, and I...suppose I should be lucky...I got the chance to...even try...fix things.”

Saryn went silent, only broken by a wheeze and a cough. Alad didn’t speak, didn’t move, didn’t even breathe for the fear that if he did, he would shatter the moment like a pane of glass. 

After a moment, Saryn suddenly let her helmet off, blood dripping slowly from her lips as a result of her coughs. Her face was pale, paler than it usually was, and there was a look in her eyes of nothing short of raw despair, and they looked wet. 

“There’s nothing...for it now, I guess...just wait until I...can’t get anymore air. I don’t even...get to see Tyl...one more time, but...that’s fair. At least I...I tried. Tried...so damn hard, and...even if I’d known...would end like this...still would have, just...to make something of myself before...had to...leave for good.” Another choked sob escaped past her lips, and she paused to catch her breath before continuing. “I’m...sorry for what I’ve become. Maybe once...I’m gone I’ll be...forgotten about, along with...everything I did wrong. That’s...best I can hope...for...only...redemption I’m likely...to get.”

She was trying very hard not to start sniveling, but it was a battle she was rapidly losing. She could help it, the only things running through her head were her rapidly darkening thoughts.

_ You’re going to die, you’re going to die, everything you’ve done was for nothing, your attempt to change was pathetic, it meant nothing, it was never genuine, you’re going to die now and pay for everything, you worthless, wretched thing, just die already, just die, just die finally! _

Silence stretched between them again. Alad could think of nothing to say, nothing that didn’t seem awkward or completely ignorant, so he stood there and watched as she shuddered, head down. That feeling was redoubled when Saryn gave up trying to hold it all in, her tears finally breaking out, flowing freely down her face, and she was rapidly reduced to a sobbing mess, wheezing and choking out more blood.

Alad was torn. He wasn’t sure what to do anymore, his emotions now conflicting with his previous decision. If he did nothing, she would die, that much was certain. But...could he really let himself stand by and watch while the frame who ultimately saved Kelpie’s life drowned in her own blood and tears? 

“Saryn, wait, please.” he said gently, trying to cut through the awkwardness he felt, and get her to stop crying before she overworked her wounded lung trying to breath and clogged her functional one with phlegm. 

For her part, she at least made an effort to calm down, nodding and sniffling. He cautiously put a hand on her shoulder and squeezed it.

“Don’t...don’t lose hope just yet. Let me take another look, I might have missed something,” he said, handing her a rag to wipe the blood off her face. 

Saryn said nothing, but lay still as he looked over the wound again. Or, pretended to at least.

_ At least try and make it look convincing, you dolt,  _ he thought to himself, trying to not make it obvious he was grinding his teeth _.  _

He made a show of rechecking her wound, trying not to recoil too obviously. The closer inspection actually managed to confirm his initial thought that he could fix it, which was both a relief and another sucker punch of guilt.

Alad took a deep breath and looked at her again. There were still tears, but not anymore life-threatening. She just looked...defeated. He didn’t blame her. After she’d gone out of her way to move mountains and change herself, she’d been told it was all for nothing. He’d been there before, been the one that had to adapt and cut out all the rotten parts of his personality, with her mocking him the whole way no less, making sure he knew that nobody thought he’d make it.

_ Oh shit. _

__ _ I’m the biggest hypocrite in the System. _

__ “Would you look at that, it’s not as bad as I first though, and I know that sounds ridiculous, cause you’ve been stabbed in the lung and all that, but you’re a Warframe-”

“C-can...be...fixed?” Saryn asked, almost quiet enough that he couldn’t hear.   
  
“Yes, it can be. I’m...sorry for giving you such a scare earlier, I should have been more thorough before making judgement.”

Saryn’s face brightened at that, not by much, but it still made a whole world of difference in her looks.

_ “Saryn!”  _

The two looked up to the hulking form of Tyl Regor in the doorway, his yellow eyes wide with what Alad could only guess was fear that seemed to instantly melt into relief upon seeing that the frame in question was, for the moment at least, alive and well. 

“Tyl!” Saryn cried, wheezing and reached a hand out to him. He ducked under the doorframe and was by her side in a heartbeat, holding her close as gently as he could manage. “Oh Tyl…I’m so...sorry.”

“Shh, it’s alright, I’m here now.” Tyl cooed to her, stroking her back.

“Where the  _ hell  _ did you come from, and how did you even get here?” Alad said, sounding more annoyed than anything else, as if Tyl just casually showing up on a relay was a normal occurrence. 

“Uh...I brought him here.” Excalibur said, shuffling in sheepishly, followed by Hildryn.

“ _ Why?”  _

“That’s what I-” Hildryn started, before getting an elbow from the other frame. 

“Because he’s been combing the System looking for her, and was worried sick.” Excalibur interjected. 

“You’ve been...looking for her.” Alad said slowly.

“Is that so hard for you to believe?” the Grineer hissed, giving him a dirty look. “Factions aside, I love her, and so I decided to take matters into my own hands.”

Saryn whimpered a bit and wrapped her arms around his neck as tightly as she could. “Missed...you.”

Tyl gingerly hugged her back. “I missed you, too.” he said, holding her back so they were face to face. “Where were you?” he asked, his voice strangely muddy and thick. 

“Hiding.” she said quietly, avoiding his eyes.

He said nothing, just pulled her close again, letting her rest her head on his shoulder.

Alad cleared his throat. “This is touching and all, but I’m in the process of trying to fix the  _ giant gaping hole in her chest, _ so if you could just let me get back to that so she doesn’t die, that’d be appreciated.”

Excalibur and Hildryn both quickly left, leaving Alad to his work, but Tyl made no move to follow them.

“You haven’t changed much.” he said, giving Alad a serious look. “I’m not just leaving. If you mess up, you’ll have more than a few angry frames on your hands.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, you’ll crack my spine over your knee like a glowstick,” groaned Alad. “Now, if you would please leave…”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Tyl said with finality.

Alad blanched at his stern reaction. For a moment they simply stared at each other vehemently, before a quiet voice interrupted their thoughts.

“Tyl…” came the faint whisper of Saryn. 

Tyl turned to see Saryn trying to maintain her grip on him, but she was visibly becoming weak.

_ “I do believe you should help her, Alad,” _ came a feminine voice from behind them. The two scientists turned to see the form of the Lotus standing before them. Both men looked astonished.

“L-Lotus?” Alad sounded like he’d been punched in the throat. “Y-you...here?”

_ “I felt this wasn’t something I could let play out on its own any longer.” _ She walked into the room, her gaze falling on Saryn.  _ “I should have stepped in sooner, much sooner. Oh, Saryn…”  _ The Lotus’s voice was filled with regret, and she kneeled next to her, taking her hand.

“Didn’t know...you actually...cared,” Saryn choked out, looking away.

_ “I’ve always cared, Saryn. I just...did not go about this the right way. I left you all alone. I’m sorry.”  _ Now it was her turn to choke up.  _ “Oh, Saryn…”  _ The Lotus wrapped her arms around the frame and hugged her as tightly as she could without causing her further pain, stroking the back on her head.

“Not mad…anymore.” With some considerable effort, Saryn tilted her head up to rest on Lotus’s shoulder. “It’s...past now. Just wish....sooner.” 

_ “ I know, and you’re right. I’ve let you down, but I promise it won’t happen again.I’m proud of you for getting this far.” _

__ “Thank...you.” she said, wheezing. 

The Lotus nodded and held her for a bit long before she released Saryn's hand and sat next to Tyl. _ “Go ahead, Alad. She’s waited long enough.” _

__ He nodded wordlessly and got to work, Lotus and Tyl trying to not make it obvious they were watching him argue with the small Helminth strain he kept in what was essentially a glorified flower pot while they talked in whispers.

_ “You really came all this way just for her?”  _ the Lotus asked.

“I love her,” he replied quietly. “And besides, where else would I be while she’s getting worked on by the only other being in the system capable of not fucking it up completely?” 

She gave a small laugh.  _ “You have a point. Still it’s...how should I say...the two of you are a rather unusual pair, you know?” _

__ “I chalk it up to circumstance, but I wouldn’t trade her for anyone else.” He shot a glance at Saryn’s still form. “She’s helped me more than even she knows.” 

_ “How did you meet her? It's a bit unusual that she didn’t try and hit you with her spores right away, considering I have essentially put a hit out on you.” _

“One of my Liches found her one day sitting alone on the outer platform of the sealab. She didn’t seem to be violent, and so I went out and talked with her for a bit.” Tyl sighed, his tone wistful. “Turns out that she just wanted to get away from the stares and whispers that followed her around the relay, and so I allowed her to stay. It was mostly just dumb luck that had us get closer.”

The Lotus gave a small smile.  _ “I will admit, I am curious as to how she went from sitting outside to having free run of your lab.” _

__ Tyl leaned back, turning thoughtful. “Well, she’s really good at looking miserable in the rain. She hadn’t done anything even remotely suggestive of violence, so I let her inside. Things just grew from there, I suppose.” 

She nodded.  _ “I suppose I can’t fault you for that. You seem quite attached to each other. It’s cute, honestly. You two make quite a good pair.” _

__ Tyl stared at her, shocked. “You...you think so?”

_ “I do.”  _ She reached over and patted him on the shoulder.  _ “Since you two will be together, may I suggest a truce between our respective factions?” _

__ Tyl took a deep breath. “I can’t really speak for all the Grineer, but I’m willing to call one between my people and yours, if it means I can stay with Saryn.”

“ _ I’ll make sure they know you’re not to be harmed, then. In exchange, I assume I won’t have to listen to them complain about your Manics anymore?” _

__ “Consider it done.”

They lapsed into silence for a while after that, watching Alad bustle around, taking care of Saryn. 

“Are you really a Sentient?” Tyl asked her suddenly. 

_ “Yes, but you’d be surprised how little that’s come to matter.” _

“Is that so? Your Warframes don’t care?” he asked, surprised. 

The Lotus nodded.  _ “I’ve proven time and time again I will always take their side,despite whoever comes for me. Ballas, Hunhow, it doesn’t matter. Both of them think I’m someone else. I love the Tenno and the Warframes, truly I do. I’m happy to guide them and watch them grow stronger, and I’m proud to fill that role.” _

__ Tyl nodded, feeling an odd sense of kinship with the Lotus. After all, he felt the same towards his Tubemen. They were his children, like the Tenno were hers.

Eventually it was done, and Alad lay on the floor, groaning.

“It’s done, I’ve saved your girlfriend.” he said. “She should be up in about an hour or so.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<>{◇}<>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
Saryn made her way out the door slowly, her legs shaking for a reason she couldn’t put her finger on. She supposed she should feel a bit calmer, but for some reason she felt sick, and nervous. To be fair, her history with relays wasn’t the best. The last time she’d come here, she’d been roped into a mission on Lua and been stabbed in the chest, the time before that she’d been ripped into by Ember, the time before that she'd been publicly humiliated by Mag, and before that she’d tried to apologize to Kelpie, which hadn’t ended well.

_ Why it’s always me who ends up dealing with this junk, I’ll never know. _

__ As soon as she was outside, Tyl was next to her, sliding his hand into hers and calming her. 

“Thanks, but I don’t have a good history with relays, and being here is activating my fight-or-flight response.” She looked up at him. “Can I hide behind you?”

He patted her on the head. “Don’t be like that. I’m sure you'll get a little leeway.”

She shook her head. “If they didn’t before, why would they now?”

“You saved Kelpie and Titania, took out a massive, dangerous Sentient, and got impaled.” 

“Stop being so reasonable.” she pouted. 

“It’ll be okay, Saryn.” He pulled her close. “I promise.” 

She sighed. “If you say so.” she slowly looked up, only to come face to face with Ember. “Tyl, you lied to me.” 

“Wait, wait, don’t sic your massive boyfriend on me just yet!” Ember squealed, backing up. “I’m not here to cause trouble.”

“Then what are you here for?” Saryn asked her, handing instinctively going to her Cyskis hilts...before remembering they weren't there anymore.

“We’ve gotta talk.” she replied simply, hands resting casually on her hips.

Saryn crossed her arms, eyes narrowing under her helmet. “What about?” 

“I’ll let you when we get there just...come with me, please?” 

“Yeah, I think the fuck not. I’m not going to fall for whatever trick you have planned. What, are you going to throw  _ actual _ tar and feathers on my head this time?”

Ember waved her hands in front of her. “Nononono, I promise it’s not a trick. I can get people to vouch for me.”

“Saryn, don’t worry. I’ll come, too.” Tyl reassured. 

“Right! Besides, if it turns out that I am lying, both of you can beat me to a pulp. Fair?” Ember responded. 

“It would be pretty satisfying after all the times you threw your stupid Glaive Prime at me.” Saryn said thoughtfully. “Fine.”

Ember nodded, and waved for them to follow her. Soon, they turned a corner, and before them was a group of Warframes. Saryn immediately stopped in her tracks.

“Ember, what are you planning?” she demanded. 

“Nothing! C’mon Saryn, you know I’m not intelligent enough to plan anything.” Ember let out an exasperated sigh. “Please, just...trust me on this.” 

“I think she’s telling the truth, Saryn. Besides, the Lotus is still around. Why would any Warframe do anything like this while she’s here?” Tyl asked. 

“I told you to stop being reasonable.” She said, pouting again. He simply patted her on the head. She took a deep breath. “Fine, okay, let’s get this over with.” 

Ember nodded, leading them forward. Once the other frames saw her, she was greeted with a very enthusiastic and tight hug from Kelpie.

“What... _ is  _ this? Why do you suddenly not despise me all of a sudden?” she asked the younger frame.

“You saved my life, Saryn.” Kelpie said quietly. “I can’t thank you enough for that. You’ve really changed since...well...you know.”

“See?” Ember asked. “It’ll be okay.” 

“Alright, I can’t wait any longer.” came a voice from the back. Vauban stepped up, her beloved Melia sugatra clutched in his hand. He held it out to her. “This is yours. I shouldn’t have taken it. I...look, we’ve had a rocky relationship in the past, and I’m sorry for abandoning you when you’d just watched your life fall apart, but I hope...maybe we can be friends again someday.”

Saryn simply nodded, having no words to say, and took the sugatra with shaky hands. “T-thank you.”

He nodded and stepped back. Ember stepped forward next. 

“I’m...I’m so sorry about how I treated you,” she said, embarrassed. “I don’t really have anything to say. I mean, Kelpie’s like my kid, and I was a bit overzealous in defending her. Uh...sorry for constantly chucking my Glaive at you...and generally being a dick.”

Saryn was lost for words once again. “I...thank you.” she finally replied. 

“You wanna throw my Glaive at me?” Ember offered, holding the weapon out to her.

“M-maybe later,” she said. 

Ember patted her on the shoulder and stepped back.

After that, the apologies seemed to blend together. There was Valkyr, Umbra, the rest of Kelpie’s mothers(Ivara, Equinox, and Garuda), Hildryn, who gave her a bone crushing hug, Excalibur, Mesa, Harrow, Oberon. They just kept coming, until Nidus stepped forward. 

“Hey, uh...it’s been a while.” he started, one pair of arms crossed while the other played with its thumbs, glancing at Tyl. 

The massive Grineer reached over and pulled Saryn closer to him. The gesture didn’t escape Nidus, but he carried on, regardless.

“I’m...sorry for the way I treated you. It was...shitty, I can’t deny that. I could make the same excuse about Kelpie, because I care about her, but...you tried to make amends, and I just brushed you off like so much dirt. I...if it means anything, I’m glad you were able to move on and find someone else.”

Saryn looked down at the floor. “Thanks, uh...I wish you well with Equinox.” 

“Thank you.” he responded, nodding. He stepped back into the crowd, being replaced by Chroma, with pixie-Titania clinging to one of his horns. 

“I’ve never really had a way with words outside of sales pitches, so I’ll keep it short.” he handed her a stack of blueprints.

“W-wait, these are-”

“Your prime parts, yeah. I’m still looking for the Syandana, and whatever other pieces you have, but I’ll get them to you as soon as I find them. I hope you put it to good use.”

Saryn said nothing, just hugged him, briefly but tightly. He snorted in surprised, sending out a cloud of ice crystals, but he let her.

“I won’t waste it, I promise.” she said, tearing up a bit under her helmet. “Thank you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<>{◇}<>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mag entered Larunda through the main entrance, her Boar still smoking from the Extermination she was just on. She was not in the best of moods, that being amplified tenfold upon entering and the first thing she saw being  _ Saryn. _

By the Lotus, could this day get  _ any _ worse?

The answer to that question is always a yes. 

The reason being that apparently nobody had noticed that Tyl Regor, of all people, was also here. Standing right next to Saryn. Who was surrounded by a veritable crowd of other Warframes. 

Maybe they had noticed, after all. 

“Which one of you idiots let  _ Tyl fucking Regor _ in here?” she hissed, striding up to them. 

The group went quiet. Finally, Hildryn answered. 

“Excalibur brought him, and Lotus is fine with it, so just cool your jets for a minute.”

“Are you kidding me? Why do you continue to stand up for this wretched thing?” Mag said in disgust, jabbing a finger at Saryn, who winced.

“Because everything’s been resolved now.” Vauban interjected, stepping up to her.

“ _ Like hell _ it has,” Mag said, stamping her foot. “Do you not see what she’s doing? Bringing an enemy into our midst, on top of everything else she did.” 

“We’ve got a truce with him.” Umbra corrected, glaring at her with his exposed eye. “He’s  _ fine. _ ”

“We’ve  _ what?! _ ” 

“ _ Do you have a problem with that, Mag? _ ” came a voice from behind her, the tone being the textbook definition of ‘strict mother voice’.

Mag whirled around to see the Lotus herself, in the flesh, towering over her.

Mag gave it approximately ten seconds of thought. “Yeah, I do.” she growled, pulling out her Dakra and charging towards Saryn.

Tyl was there in an instant. With blinding speed, he grabbed the charging frame’s arm, lifted her, and tossed her away like a sack of flour. She landed with a thunk, but was almost instantly back on her feet, only to find herself tangled with the limbs of Mesa and Nidus.

“Slow down there, Magnets.” Mesa quipped, holding her back. 

“ _ LET ME GO!” _ Mag screamed, thrashing her limbs in a vain attempt to free herself. “ _ THAT BITCH NEEDS TO PAY!” _

“Maggie, she’s been stabbed in the tit, let it go.” Titania said from her perch atop Chroma.

_ “You disappoint me, Mag.”  _ the Lotus said quietly.  _ “Saryn has more than earned her redemption. Hopefully you’ll learn to forgive one day, as the others have.” _

__ “Alright, time for you to go.” Mesa said, dragging her away with Nidus’s help.

“Wait!” Saryn said, stepping forward. Everyone in the room turned to her like she’d just gotten another blade through the chest. 

“Why? She just tried to kill you.” Nidus questioned, giving her an odd look.

“Because it’s my fault she’s like this.” She walked up to Mag, but stayed out of arm’s reach. “Please, let her go. Just for now, at least.” 

Mesa and Nidus looked at each other, then shrugged. 

“Mag I...fuck, there’s no good way for me to say this that can make up for what I’ve done to you. I’m sorry. I’m really fucking sorry. I have no excuses for it, no defenses. It was disgusting of me. I don’t think you’ll want to forgive me, and I don’t think you ever will, and I accept that. It’s just a consequence, but at the very least I hope you can be happier now.”

Mag was still as a rock for a long moment, before letting helmet off. Saryn took a step back. Mag was...so young looking. Her fluffy black hair framed her pale face, and her steely greenish-grey eyes were staring piercingly at her. For a moment she seemed almost pensive, before promptly spitting in Saryn’s face, and even though it was just on her helmet, it still cut deep.

“You’ll never change.” Mag’s voice was low and poisonous. She turned the rest of them. “She’s faking it, you’ll see.”

With that, she stalked off.

“You don’t...you don’t believe her, right?” Saryn asked, wiping her helmet and backing up slowly until she felt Tyl’s hand on her shoulder. She let him pull her close.

“Pfft, course we don’t. Nobody would just  _ let  _ themself get stabbed in the tit.” Titania said brightly. There was a collective sigh.

“Y’know what? I’ll take it. Thanks Titania.” Saryn said, trying to take a few deep breaths and calm her racing heart.

“I aim to please.” said the faerie, fluttering her wings happily.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~<>{◇}<>~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Saryn's frigid colors for these last few chapters  
  
  



	40. Epilogue: At The Road’s End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Congratulations, White Orchid Maiden, you made it. It's over.
> 
> For now
> 
> (Ft. the Jellyfish and the Squid)

“So what’s this I hear about you and Saryn being on good terms?” Michi purred, plunking herself in Alad’s lap. He grumbled but let her, wrapping an arm around her.

“Yeah, I saved her life, and now we’re friends or whatever.” he said.

“Oh? You sound very dismissive. There must be more to it then that. C’mon, talk to me.” she cooed, resting her head against his chest.

“Alright, alright, you can stop rubbing against me like you’re Galatea when she wants to be fed. The entirety of it is that I lied to her.” He took a deep breath.

“What do you mean?”

“I lied to her and told her she was going to die, when I could’ve easily fixed her wound. After that, she well...she broke down. I convinced her she was going to die, and she just...shattered. Poured her heart out.” He sighed, taking a moment before continuing. “I...I’m glad I heard it, although I regret tricking her like that. I backpedaled so I could tell her the truth. Long story short, she’s very grateful to me for saving her life, and I hope that’s enough of an apology for lying to her first.”

“Glad you heard her break? Why?” Michi questioned.

“Fuck, that sounds worse than it is. I mean...I nearly let her die. Just...sat back and let her die, after she saved Kelpie no less.” He rubbed the back of his neck slowly, the gesture seeming unsettled. “I’m not happy she was in that much emotional pain, but because she went on that rant I was able to recant my stupid, foolish desision, if that makes any sense.”

“Yeah, I get it. Just...if there’s ever a situation like that ever again, don’t just willingly sit by and let someone innocent die, alright?” She looked him in the eyes. “You’re better than that, I know you are.”

“Thank you, Michi.” he said quietly.

“Besides, Saryn earned her redemption. You realize that, don’t you?” she asked him, her gaze unwavering.

“Of course I do. The Saryn I knew before would’ve never saved Kelpie, and trust me, I’ve known her long enough for that. We’ve had an...ugly history even before Kelpie.”

Michi nodded, satisfied. “Maybe you ought to own up to her about it. After all, you won’t feel better until you do.”

Alad took a deep breath, letting it out in a sigh. “I don’t feel like I need to. I reneged on that decision, and I feel guilty for even considering it. I suspect it’s going to sit on my shoulder and haunt me for a long time, and I’ll most likely try and find some other way to make it up to her, but I...can’t tell her that.”

“Why not?” Michi asked. “I’m not judging you, promise, I’m just curious.”

“I mean...she’d probably go back to hating me for it, not that I’d blame her.” His gaze dropped to the floor, his voice quieting. “We just made up. I don’t want to risk ruining everything. And just...telling someone you nearly let them die when you could’ve saved them...that could fuck her up.” 

Michi nodded. “I understand. I’m sure things will work out, one way or another.”

She might’ve imagined it, but she swore she felt him pull his arm around her a bit tighter. “No idea why you’re always so encouraging like this.”

“I just know things will be okay, is all.” She leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder. “I mean, I’ve stuck with you so far, haven’t I?”

He blushed. “That’s true, I suppose. I’m not quite sure what brought you here in the first place, but you don’t seem interested in leaving, and that’s good enough for me.” 

She leaned over and planted a kiss on his cheek. “No, I’m not interested in leaving.  _ So hurry up and ask already. _ ” she muttered. 

Alad was taken aback. “W-what?” 

At that moment, Kelpie walked in. “I’m back. Saryn loved the blades, named them ‘Broken Orchid’.” 

Alad breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m glad she likes them. That Sentient blade material was the toughest stuff I’ve ever had to work with, and the only thing I was doing was putting hilts on them.”

Michi gave him a look that screamed ‘this isn’t over’. “I’m sure she’ll find them very useful.” 

“I’ll be in my tank if you need me, Dad.” Kelpie moved off in the direction of her room, leaving the two of them alone again. 

“So, you were saying, Michi?” Alad asked her, bracing himself for another one of her ‘Why have you not fucking proposed yet’ rants. 

Surprisingly, she just sighed. “We’ll talk about it later, alright? You look tired enough as it is.” 

Alad breathed a sigh of relief, and gave her a quick kiss. Maybe he would end up popping that question.

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It felt fitting to return to this particular forest. The wisterias were still blooming more vibrantly than ever, and the twilight lent the woods an ethereal, silvery outline. Tyl and Saryn were sitting together under a particularly gnarled trunk, letting the soft, amethyst petals decorate their heads and shoulders. Saryn held a hand out to a huge white luna moth, which gently landed on her fingers, fluttering its wings slightly.

“It’s been too long since we first came here.” Saryn said, happily resting her head in Tyl’s lap. 

Tyl stroked her hair, nodding. “It has. A lot’s happened since then, hasn’t it?”

“Too much, if you ask me. At least it’s over now, and I get to stay with you.” She sighed happily.

“How does it feel to not be hated by your own?” he asked.

She was silent for a bit before answering. “I’m not sure, honestly. I suppose I’m just happy everything’s worked out. That I really did manage to change.”

Tyl smiled under his mask. “You seem happier, more content.” 

“That’s because I’m with you.” She shuddered. “By the Lotus that was sappy, wasn't it?”

“It was very sweet despite that.” He pushed his mask up a bit and kissed her forehead.

“I can’t believe you made a truce with the Lotus of all people. What will the queens think? This won’t come back to bite you will it?” she asked after a few moments.

“That truce is beneficial to me in more ways than just being able to have you, and I would’ve been a fool not to accept her offer. My Tubemen won’t be in danger from your comrades, and I’ll be able to work without them coming in and wrecking everything. No more getting my resources stolen or my men killed either. As for the queens, or, queen rather, well, I’m basically the only competent scientist and smart guy she has, and because of that, she tends to be a tad more lenient with me.” he paused for a moment, letting her climb onto his lap and rest herself against his chest.“Besides, it’s not like I’ve joined forces with the Lotus. As for you, well...what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”

“You’re too clever for your own good.” she purred. “You don’t sound too fond of your resident monarch. I thought your genes told you that you had to love her.”

“Ah well…” Tyl thought for a moment. “Let’s just say there’s plenty of things you don’t know about me yet and leave it at that for now, alright?”

“Fiiiiine.” she groaned jokingly. 

“Thank you. Besides, I have more important things to talk to you about.”

Saryn looked up at him. “Such as?”

“Do you still want to see my face?” he asked.

Saryn seemed to straighten up at that. “A-are you willing to show me?”

“Of course I am. It’s only fair, considering what I want to ask you afterwards, and the fact you’ve shown me yours. It’s high time I make good on that promise.” he sighed. “You Warframes aren’t the only ones with hangups about your faces, but I owe you.”

“You don’t have to show me if you don’t want to.” she said slowly. “But I do still want to see it if you’re fine to show.”

Tyl said nothing, just pat her on the head before slowly removing his mask and helm.

Saryn stared at him for a long time, trying to process everything. Even by non Grineer standards he was a good looking man, the few gene rot scars he possessed looking old and clearly cured. His eyes were different from a normal Grineer’s, still yellow but not as...diseased looking, instead bearing a much brighter, more vibrant shade, and if she looked closely, she could pick out a few flecks of blue in them. He had a strong, pronounced jawline, high cheekbones, and his mouth had an easy smile. His nose was just slightly crooked, like it had been broken at least once and not healed entirely properly, but to her it looked rather charming. His hair was very thick and well groomed, coal black streaked with silver.

She reached out and placed a hand on his cheek. “I didn’t expect you to be so handsome,” she said, half-jokingly. He actually  _ blushed. _

“Y-yeah, well...I didn’t expect you to be as pretty as you are under your helmet, so we’re even.”

This time it was her turn to get flustered. “I’m not  _ that  _ pretty.” she said, looking at the ground.

Tyl put a finger under her chin and lifted her face so her eyes met his. “You are. Maybe I don’t have as much experience with pretty women, considering I’m Grineer, but I’ve still seen some in my day. I know men who would’ve given their left eye to have someone as heart-stoppingly beautiful as you.”

Saryn blushed a deeper shade of crimson at that, and looked up at him, her voice quiet. “D-dammit Tyl, you don’t have to be this charming, you’ve already landed me.”

“I want to keep you though, don’t I?” he responded, grinning. “Why do you think I showed you my face? Gotta make you sure you like it.”

“Tyl, I would’ve stayed even if you weren’t as silver-tongued and ridiculously cute as you are.” Saryn reassured him. “You could look like Vay Hek or worse under there, and I’d still stay with you.”

Only when he stopped shaking did he realize how nervous he’d actually been about that. Mutated or not, Grineer were Grineer, and so they tended to look like moldy sponges at best, most of the time at least. 

“Sooo…” Saryn tapped the tips of her index fingers together. “You said you had something to ask me?”

“I do, in a moment. Just let me…” He trailed off, before pulling her face close and kissing her. Saryn’s eyes widened in surprise, but it only lasted a moment before she realized that  _ Tyl was kissing her _ . She wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. Eventually they broke it off, both of them blushing just a little deeper.

“Ok, you've been teasing me for too long, what do you wanna ask?” Saryn pressed, perching her hands on his chest.

Tyl took a deep breath, letting it out in a long sigh. “This is going to sound absolutely insane, but I got the idea while I was looking for you, and I haven’t been able to convince myself it’s bad.” He paused, fidgeting, then stopped, looking her in the eye. “Would you want to marry me someday?”

Saryn sat stock-still for several moments, simply looking at him. “You...you did ask what I think you asked, didn’t you?” she questioned carefully.

“Don’t worry, you’re not going crazy.” Tyl stroked her back. “What do you say?” 

Saryn fiercely threw her arms around Tyl’s neck again. “Did you seriously expect me to answer anything other than yes? ‘Cause if you did, you were wrong . Oh Tyl...” She paused for a moment. “What do you mean by ‘someday’ though?”

He stroked her hair as she hugged him. “We really haven’t been together very long at all, and I feel like we should get to know each other better before taking on a commitment like that.” He gave her a reassuring smile. “I have no doubts about the eventuality of it, but I’d just like to spend more time with you before taking that step.”

“I suppose you’re right.” She grumbled. “Aaaahhhh, it’s gonna be so hard waiting.”

“Don’t worry,” he said, his voice soft and comforting. “We’ll get there, I promise. I love you, and there’s nobody I’d rather spend my days with.”

“We’d better.” she muttered, before putting her hands on his cheeks and kissing him. “I love you too, Tyl.”

~End 🦋  
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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all very much for reading this! Seriously, 40 fricken chapters. It's been a hell of a ride. Thank you to my lovely beta readers and my co-writer.
> 
> Stay tuned for the next story, hopefully coming soon. This time, Alad gets the spotlight for a hot minutes ;]


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